When StarClan Gets Bored
by Chucklez-Lives-On
Summary: This is a story about what happens when StarClan gets bored of the Clans' boring lives! Wacky things are about to occur! WARNING: RANDOM :). Read and review please, but please don't flame! Okay, I stink at summaries! But PLEEZE READ. Rated "T" just in case.
1. Let the Randomness Begin!

The StarClan cats plucked lazily at the ground. "The Clans are too boring." commented Bluestar, staring down at a "Looking Puddle".

The ThunderClan patrols were boringly hunting boring prey.

"You've got that right." Yellowfang sighed. "Somehow, we need to spice up their lives."

"Oh, I know!" Lionheart announced. "Yellowfang, didn't you say you could hypnotize cats?"

"Oh yeah!" Yellowfang purred. "Lionheart, are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"That I need to get some more fur polish? MY FUR ISN'T SHINY ENOUGH!" Lionheart wailed.

"No, you mouse-brain! I'll summon the Clan cats for hypnotism to go crazy!"

"Oh, good idea. I SUMMON ALL CLAN CATS TO STARCLAN!" Bluestar screamed. Poof. The Clan cats appeared.

"Jayfeather, I told you to stop stalking my dreams!" whined Bramblestar. "It isn't me this time, I swear!" cried Jayfeather.

"Then who is it?"

"Us!" Bluestar stepped up, with Yellowfang.

"Bluestar? You're a dream-stalker?" gasped Bramblestar.

"How did he _ever_ become Clan leader?" whispered Yellowfang.

"No, I summoned you here for hypnotism." Bluestar mewed.

"Yay!" Snowkit cheered.

"Now, follow my tail. You are hypnotized..." Yellowfang mewed.

The cats watched Yellowfang's tail wave in the air.

"Ooh," Dewkit mewed. "Pretty!"

"Why is a kit drooling over Yellowfang?" whispered Firestar. "She isn't pretty!"

"Oh, who knows," grumbled Mousefur.

"EEK! ANOTHER UGLY CAT!" screamed Firestar. He ran away.

"You are now hypnotized," Yellowfang whispered. "You will go crazy. When you wake up, you will become crazy and random."

"_Very_ random." Bluestar added.

"And _very_ crazy." Mousefur put in.

"When I count to three, you will wake up. One, two, three!" Yellowfang clapped her paws. The Clan cats disappeared.

Let the randomness begin!

* * *

**So, this is the beginning of my cats-going-crazy story. Read and review please, but no flames!**


	2. The Beginning Randomness and DA Deputies

**ThunderClan...**

Bramblestar ran out of his den. "Wake up, my homies!" he yelled. "And come gather 'round AwesomeRock, 'cuz Cherrypaw and Molepaw are becoming warriors, and Seedkit and Lilykit are becoming 'paws, and there's a couple other things I want to discuss!"

The warriors ran out of their dens as though they had all drunk fifty gallons of coffee.

''Hey, Bramblestar, I haven't gotten my gazillion hours of sleep yet!" complained Cloudtail.

"Good for you! I don't care. GATHER 'ROUND, MY PEEPS!" Bramblestar yelled. "So, down to business! I think Cherrypaw and Molepaw are ready to become warriors! So from now on, Cherrypaw will be known as Cherrypie and Molepaw, you will be known as Mole-" Bramblestar coughed. "Oh, I must be coming down with a cold."

"Cherrypie! Moleohimustbecomingdownwitha cold!" cheered the Clan.

Suddenly, a tomcat burst into the camp. "WHERE'S DA PIE?!" he yelled.

"Who are you?" Lionblaze asked.

"I'm DA PIE! I was sent from StarClan to make your lives more interesting!" Da Pie announced. Then he frowned. "HEY, NARRATOR! I'M DA PIE! ALL IN CAPS, KAY?!"

"'Kay." the narrator mumbled. He corrected the sentence.

"Thank you!" DA PIE called.

"No prob, dude!"

"Now, I have some announcements. This Clan is now called KittypetClan, 'cuz more than half this Clan is made of kittypets, and I am the leader, so I can do whatever I want. Squirrelflight, you are no longer my deputy. Oh wise StarClan, hear me say that DA PIE is now my deputy!" Bramblestar announced.

"WHAT?!" screamed Squirrelflight. "No fair!"

"Yes it is!" Bramblestar shot back. "DA PIE has proved more worthy than you!"

"How?" snapped Squirrelflight.

"He hasn't annoyed me yet!" Bramblestar mewed.

"WHAAA!" Squirrelflight burst into tears and ran out of the camp.

"Well, that went well." Bramblestar looked down at his new deputy.

DA PIE wasn't listening. He was distributing orders. "Now, my first order as deputy is for somebody to get me some pie!"

* * *

**RiverClan...**

"WAKE UP, MY FISHY FRIENDS!" yelled Mistystar, scrambling up the rock. "I have some important announcements!"

"What?" Reedwhisker grumbled.

Mistystar frowned. "You're grumpy. I NEED A NEW DEPUTY!"

"Did somebody say "deputy"?" Hawkfrost appeared, eyes bright. "I'll be your deputy!"

"Nah, you're more annoying than Reedwhisker."

"Shoot."

With a _pop_, Hawkfrost disappeared.

Then, there was another _pop_. "Hello! I am DA EPIC ONE. I am your dream deputy!"

"Oh, yay! StarClan, I am replacing Reedwhisker with DA EPIC ONE. Approve my choice or I will attack you!"

* * *

**StarClan...**

"Okay, sis, we approve!" Stonefur yowled down from StarClan.

Bluestar shuddered and turned to Oakheart. "I didn't know our daughter could be so vicious."

* * *

**Back in RiverClan...**

DA EPIC ONE was passing out bombs. "We are going to blow up the lake!" he mewed, pawing a very grumpy Reedwhisker a bomb.

"But wouldn't that mean we'd be short of prey?" a queen asked.

DA EPIC ONE grinned. "Sure, but bombing things is fun!"

"I thought you were DA EPIC ONE, not DA BOMB," Reedwhisker grumbled.

"I am!" DA EPIC ONE purred. "But bombing things is epic!"

"Yes, yes it is!" Mistystar added encouragingly. "LET'S GO!" she ran out of camp with her bomb. The Clan followed.

In conclusion, they blew up the lake.

And this is why the Clans experienced a drought.

* * *

**ShadowClan...**

"I don't like Rowanclaw being deputy." Blackstar sobbed. "Russetfur was a much better deputy, and she was much more attractive!"

A ginger she-cat appeared in front of him. "I am DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR." she said.

Blackstar's eyes turned to hearts. "WILL YOU MARRY ME?" he asked.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR shrunk away. "No..."

"Will you be my deputy?"

"Yes!" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR licked Blackstar's ear.

Blackstar fainted.

* * *

**When Blackstar woke up...**

"I have an announcement, everyone!" Blackstar yowled. "DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR will be my new deputy!"

"What?" cried Tawnypelt.

Rowanclaw fainted in shock.

* * *

**StarClan...**

Russetfur was growling. "How dare that prissy she-cat steal my man!"

Raggedstar sat beside her. "You can't blame him. DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR is a smokin' babe!"

Russetfur attacked him.

* * *

**WindClan...**

Onestar glared at Ashfoot. "You are not a good deputy. You are too old to be any fun."

"Hey! That's not nice!" Ashfoot mewed, insulted.

"See what I mean? That sentence was't fun!" Onestar cried. "I need a replacement deputy?"

"Here I am!" a small cat appeared in front of him. "I am DA KITTY. I am your replacement deputy!"

"YAY!" Onestar cried. "Ashfoot, you're fired."

"What? You can't do that!" Ashfoot snapped.

"Try me."

In conclusion, Onestar lost a life.

* * *

**StarClan...**

"This is _much_ more exciting!"

"Oh yeah."

* * *

**IMPORTANT:**

**The DAs are all related, they are littermates. They were sent by StarClan to make the Clans even more exciting. Here is the list of the DAs:**

**DA PIE: ThunderClan's new deputy, and the one that StarClan sent to make ThunderClan more exciting. He has creamy brown fur and green eyes.**

**DA EPIC ONE: RiverClan's new deputy, and the one StarClan sent to make RiverClan more excitng. He has black fur and yellow eyes.**

**DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR: ShadowClan's new deputy, and the one that StarClan sent to make ShadowClan more exciting. She looks exactly like Russetfur, but she's got something to make her even more pretty than the real Russetfur.**

**DA KITTY: WindClan's new deputy, and she was sent to make WindClan more exciting. She is a very small brown she-cat with a fluffy tail and has green eyes.**


	3. The Lovepool

**This is for you Moonblaze1509!**

* * *

"Today is the day I go to the Moonpool!" Jayfeather announced. "DON'T take care while I'm gone!" He ran out of camp.

DA PIE blinked. "He isn't a very nice cat."

"No, he isn't. But you'll get used to him after awhile." Lionblaze reassured him.

"Okay." DA PIE was satisfied with his answer.

* * *

**Meanwhile, at the Moonpool...**

"Heehee!" Spottedleaf and Silverstream giggled.

"C'mon, Spottedleaf, do it!" Silverstream mewed encouragingly.

"Okay!" Spottedleaf dumped a bucket of Love Potion into the Moonpool.

The two she-cats giggled evilly and floated back to StarClan.

* * *

**Meanwhile again...**

"I hate you, Willowshine!" Jayfeather puffed. "You're not nice to me!"

"You're never nice to me!" Willowshine spat.

"Stop fighting!" Littlecloud begged. "My old bones can't take this hatred!"

"GO GET AN APPRENTICE, YOU BUM!" screamed Jayfeather.

Littlecloud burst into tears. He cried so much he created a flood and swept the medicine cats to the Moonpool.

And this is how the water came back.

* * *

**Meanwhile again (Oh will these ever end?) in StarClan...**

"Heehee, I can feel it! The moment is coming!" announced Spottedleaf.

Silverstream purred. "This should be interesting. They'll fall in love with the first things they see!"

* * *

**Back at the Moonpool...**

"I hate you so much, Willowshine!" Jayfeather spat.

"I hate you too, Jayfeather!" Willowshine hissed.

"Time to dream!" Mothwing mewed, sounding falsely cheerful.

"Wait, I thought you didn't believe in StarClan!" Kestrelflight mewed (he was always clueless).

"I didn't, until the Dark Forest battle."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Let's get this night over with, okay?" Jayfeather growled.

"'Kay!" Mothwing mewed. She bent down to lap at the water. The other cats followed.

Jayfeather looked at Willowshine.

Willowshine looked at Jayfeather.

Littlecloud looked up at the sky and saw Cinderpelt's face.

Mothwing looked at her reflection in the water (I always new she was vain!).

Kestrelflight looked at the Harry Potter book series.

Their eyes turned into hearts.

"I love you, Willowshine!" Jayfeather mewed.

"I love you too, Jayfeather!" Willowshine breathed.

They began to lick each other.

Littlecloud closed his eyes and began to dream. "I LOVE YOU CINDERPELT!" he screamed. He saw Cinderpelt gathering herbs. He ran up to her. "I LOVE YOU!"

Cinderpelt's eyes widened in terror. Then Littlecloud licked her. Cinderpelt ran away screaming.

Kestrelflight hugged the Harry Potter books. "I love you, Harry!" he rocked back and forth.

So wrong on so many levels.

Mothwing stared at her reflection. "Who's a pretty kitty? You are! Yes you are!" Mothwing nuzzled her reflection.

That is also wrong.


	4. The Gangnam Gathering and Ferncloud

Gathering

"Hello, cats of the Clans!" Bramblestar yelled. "Meet my new deputy, DA PIE!"

DA PIE bowed as the Clans cheered for him.

"Meet DA EPIC ONE!" yowled Mistystar.

DA EPIC ONE bowed as the Clans cheered for him.

"This is my smokin' deputy, DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR!" roared Blackstar.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR curtsied as the Clans cheered. Several of the toms' eyes turned to hearts and started to flirt with her.

"And my new deputy is DA KITTY!" Onestar announced.

DA KITTY curtsied as she was cheered for.

"And I have another announcement!" Bramblestar yowled. "My Clan's new name is KittypetClan!"

ThunderClan and WindClan cheered.

ShadowClan booed.

"Wimpy." RiverClan muttered.

"My Clan's new name is DA-REPLACEMENT-RUSSETFURCLAN!" roared Blackstar.

ShadowClan and RiverClan cheered.

WindClan snorted.

ThunderClan grumbled.

"AND MY CLAN'S NAME IS BOMBCLAN!" Mistystar yowled triumphantly.

Everyone cheered.

"And my Clan is BoringClan!" Onestar cheered.

No one cheered.

Onestar pouted.

DA KITTY jumped up onto the tree branch and whispered frantically whispered into his ear.

Onestar's eyes widened. Then he nodded. "Never mind! We are called KittyClan!"

No one cheered.

Onestar pouted some more.

DA KITTY jumped up onto Onestar's tree branch again.

"But you said-" Onestar shook his head. "Never mind. AGAIN. We are named DAKITTYCLAN!"

Everyone cheered very loudly. Onestar was pleased.

Later

"GANGNAM STYLE DANCE CONTEST!" roared Blackstar. "What's Gangnam Style?" asked Amberkit (The cats have gone crazy, so the kits are at the Gathering).

The warriors, leaders, deputies, apprentices, and medicine cats gasped. "GASP!"

Ferncloud came down from the sky. "No!" she cried. "Protect the kits. Don't let them watch the video! It is too inappropriate."

"FERNCLOUD!" cried Dustpelt.

"Have you come back to be ThunderClan's kit machine?" some cat asked.

"Yes!" Ferncloud beamed. Then she gave birth to thirty kits.

"Aw..." the she-cats purred.

"YAY, FERNCLOUD!" ThunderClan cheered.

"I'm a father of thirty more kits!" Dustpelt cheered.

"NOW, IT'S TIME TO PARTY!" screamed Blackstar. "Hit it, DA REPLCEMENT RUSSETFUR!" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR grabbed her iPod and plugged it into extremely big speakers. Then put on the Gangnam Style.

"HIDE YOUR KITS!" screamed Ferncloud. She shoved her kits into a bush.

Brightheart was about to hide her kits, but then Cloudtail stopped her. "They're mature enough!"

"Ya mommy!" Dewkit squeaked. He put on puppy-dog eyes. "Please?"

"No." Brightheart shoved her kits into a bush.

**One minute later...**

"DANCE OFF!" Blackstar yelled. "Four cats from each Clan are going to dance to Gangnam Style! The winner gets dis chocolate bar!" he held up a chocolate bar.

"EPIC." DA EPIC ONE mewed.

"All righty! KittypetClan, me, DA PIE, Dustpelt, and Brackenfur will be dancing for KittypetClan!"

"Me, DA EPIC ONE, Mothwing, and Reedwhisker the Grump will be dancing for BombClan!" Mistystar announced.

"DAKITTYCLAN, listen up! Me, DA KITTY, Ashfoot, and Crowfeather will be dancing! 'Kay?"

"No!" Breezepelt screamed. "I wanna dance!"

"Okay! Ashfoot, since you're so old, your bones will probably break if you start dancing, so you're being replaced again! With Breezepelt!"

"You can't do that!" Ashfoot snarled.

"Try me."

Onestar lost another life.

"Okay, DA-REPLACEMENT-RUSSETFURCLAN, me, DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR, Tawnypelt, and Tigerheart will be the contestants!" announced Blackstar.

"We need judges!" fretted Mistystar.

"One judge from each Clan!" declared Bramblestar. "Seedpaw will be the judge from my Clan!"

"Larkpaw from my Clan!" Onestar announced.

"Stoatpaw from mine!" Blackstar mewed.

"And Heronpaw from my Clan!" Mistystar announced.

"We will have a preliminary match, then three cats from each Clan will be 'dismissed' from the games." Seedpaw announced.

"Okay!"

"WindClan first!" Stoatpaw mewed.

"'Kay!" Onestar said, slightly dizzy (he hadn't recovered from losing his life).

"BEGIN!" screamed Heronpaw.

"FOR CHOCOLATE!" cried WindClan.

Onestar went first. He did the disco, because when he lost his life, he also got a concussion and a temporary memory loss. He forgot how to dance to Gangnam Style.

"EPIC!" Larkpaw applauded.

"THAT WAS PATHETIC!" screamed Heronpaw, Seedpaw, and Stoatpaw. "You are already eliminated!"

Onestar slunk off the stage.

Breezepelt went overboard with the dancing and fell off the stage. He couldn't dance due to fifty broken bones, five cuts, two hundred and three bruises, and a concussion.

WindClan cheered.

ThunderClan whooped.

ShadowClan purred.

RiverClan shrugged.

The DAs looked confused (They hadn't been in the Clans long enough to know how annoying Breezepelt was).

The judges eliminated him.

Nobody called for a medicine cat.

Ferncloud gave birth to five more kits.

Blackstar flirted with DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR.

Ashfoot killed Onestar again.

StarClan stared at the Clans.

Clouds covered the moon.

All of this happened at once.


	5. In Honor of the Hurricane named Sandy

"Listen up, KittypetClan!" Bramblestar leaped up onto AwesomeRock. "I have received news that we will be caught in a hurricane today!"

"OMG." somebody said.

"What's going to happen?" one of Ferncloud's kits, Rainbowkit, asked.

Bramblestar looked solemnly at the kit, "We are going to die."

Rainbowkit and the rest of the kits began to cry.

Ferncloud glared at Bramblestar. "We are not going to die." she reassured her kits. "We will just stay in the nursery, and we'll be fine. All a hurricane is going to be is a bit of rain and wind. We will be safe and sheltered.

"I'm hungry." complained Hungrykit.

"Well, you should be," Snowkit said. "You were named Hungrykit for a reason!"

"Yeah." Hungrykit mewed.

Suddenly, the storm began.

The cats started to scream.

Lightning touched down at the fresh-kill pile.

The cats screamed some more.

"What am I going to eat?" Hungrykit wailed.

"You don't eat prey yet!" Dewkit puffed.

"Right."

"To your dens, all of you!" DA PIE yelled.

The cats scrambled into their dens. Dustpelt, Ferncloud, Brightheart, Daisy, and the kits ran to the nursery.

"Now, shall we finish naming our kits?" Dustpelt mewed, when all of them got settled in.

"Yes!" Ferncloud mewed.

**1. Rainbowkit**

**2. Candykit**

**3. Sugarkit**

**5. Sandykit**

**6. Snapkit**

**7. Cracklekit**

**8. Popkit**

**9. Dustpelt-is-amazingkit**

**10. CocoaPuffkit**

**11. Hungrykit**

**12. Tacokit**

**14. Chucklezkit**

**17. Hawkkit**

**18. Stripekit**

**19. Awesomekit**

**20. Ravenkit**

**21. Barleykit**

**22. Spottedkit**

**23. Kittykit**

**24. Gorgeouskit**

**25. Moonkit**

**26. Sunkit**

**27. Starkit**

**28. Randomkit**

**30. Herbkit**

**31. Amazingkit**

**32. Epickit**

**33. Ferncloud-the-kit-machinekit**

**34. Happykit**

**35. Superkit**

"Perfect!" mewed Ferncloud.

Dustpelt beamed. "I know right?"

Hurricanekit and Sandykit were whispering to each other. Then they began to leap on the other kits. "We're a hurricane!" sreamed Hurricanekit.

Herbkit began to cry. Starkit whimpered. The other kits screamed.

Snowkit, Amberkit, and Dewkit looked bored.

"Kits." Dewkit muttered.

"What should we do during the hurricane?" asked Chucklezkit.

"I KNOW! Peetakit yelled. "We're going to do the HUNGER GAMES."

Uh-oh.


	6. The Random Reaping

They were poofed onto a stage.

Peetakit and Katnisskit shooed everyone off the stage, so they were the only ones on it.

"Okay, cats!" Katnisskit yelled. "I will choose the she-cat tributes! There are twelve she-cats selected, and twelve toms, of course, a tom and a she-cat from each district!" she grabbed a big glass bowl that had the names of the she-kits. "Okay, from District One we have Amberkit!"

Peetakit took his glass bowl and dug a name out of it. "The District One tom tribute be Hungrykit!"

"District Two's she-cat shall be Sandykit!"

"And the tom will be Hurricanekit!"

"District Three's she-cat is Rainbowkit!"

"And the tom is Dewkit!"

"District Four's she-cat will be Candykit!"

"And the tom will be Snowkit!"

"District Five's she-cat is Sugarkit!"

"And the tom will be Randomkit!"

"District Six's she-cat is Sunkit!"

"The tom is Moonkit!"

"District Seven's she-cat will be Herbkit!"

"The tom is Starkit!"

"District Eight's she-cat is Cracklekit!"

"The tom is Snapkit!"

"District Nine's she-cat is Fluffykit!"

"And the tom is Popkit!"

"District Ten's she-cat will be Hawkkit!"

"The tom will be Chucklezkit!"

"District Eleven's she-cat will be Kittykit!"

"And the tom will be Dustpelt-is-amazingkit!"

"And the District Twelve tributes will be us!" Katnisskit announced.

Gorgeouskit pouted. "I want to participate!"

Peetakit shook his head. "We have received several letters from the toms that they think you are too gorgeous to be put into danger!"

"Okay!" Gorgeouskit was satisfied with that answer.


	7. The Crazy Games

"Okay!" Gorgeouskit, the announcer, mewed. "On my count, try to kill each other! The survivor will be award fifty mice a day for life!"

"Okay!" they yelled (none of them really understood that you were supposed to run through an arena and try to survive, and kill when you saw somebody. Katnisskit and Peetakit tried to explain it to them, but they wouldn't listen). They unsheathed their claws.

"Three, two, one! KILL!" Gorgeouskit screamed.

Amberkit and Hungrykit attacked each other.

Sandykit and Hurricanekit attacked each other.

Rainbowkit and Dewkit attacked each other.

Candykit and Snowkit attacked each other.

Sugarkit and Randomkit attacked each other.

Sunkit and Moonkit attacked each other.

Herbkit and Starkit attacked each other.

Cracklekit and Snapkit attacked each other.

Fluffykit and Popkit attacked each other.

Hawkkit and Chucklezkit attacked each other.

Kittykit and Dustpelt-is-amazingkit attacked each other.

"No, no, no!" Peetakit screamed. "You need to try to kill the cats from other Districts!"

"Oh." Starkit mewed. He ran at Popkit and attacked him.

In the end, their claws and teeth were too small to do any damage. Nothing happened.

Katnisskit and Peetakit were displeased.

"This is less like the Hunger Games than I thought it would be." Peetakit pouted.

"This was more like, 'The Crazy Games'." Katnisskit mewed.

Peetakit and Katnisskit spent some time pouting over the failed games.

Then the hurricane was done.

The kits were poofed back to camp.


	8. Love, Anger, and Loopholes

"DA-REPLACEMENT-RUSSETFUR, will you please go out with me?" Blackstar begged.

DA-REPLACEMENT-RUSSETFUR frowned. "I don't know. I was sent from StarClan to be the replacement deputy and to make this Clan more exciting. That was all I was ordered to do."

"So? If you became my mate, you'll make my life more exciting."

"But I'm here to make the Clan more exciting, not just you."

"But if I'm more exciting, the Clan will be more exciting, 'cuz I'm the leader and they follow my lead." Blackstar mewed importantly, puffing out his chest.

"Ooh, yeah..." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed, "Okay, Blackstar, I'll be your mate."

"Yes!" Blackstar cheered as DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR purred.

Then they began to lick each other.

**Conclusion: There is always a loophole for love.**

* * *

**StarClan...**

"That freakish little freak!" Russetfur was freaking out. "Paws off my man, DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR!" she screamed.

Raggedstar sat beside her (doesn't this seem familiar?). "You can't blame her. DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR is smokin' hot! I would've wanted to be her mate too if I was Blackstar!" then he got this dreamy look in his eyes. "In fact, I want to be her mate now!"

Russetfur attacked him. "I'm telling Yellowfang you said that!" she hissed.

"NO! NOT YELLOWFANG!" wailed Raggedstar.

Russetfur ran off. "Yellowfang!" she called. "Raggedstar wants to be mates with DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR!"

"Oh no you didn't!" Yellowfang snapped at the former ShadowClan leader, sounding very sassy.

She attacked Raggedstar.

* * *

**Back down on earth...**

"I LOVE YOU CINDERPELT!" Littlecloud cried.

* * *

**In ThunderClan...**

"All righty, folks! Snowkit, Amberkit, and Dewkit are now apprentices! Whoever wants to can mentor 'em!" cried Bramblestar.

The cats started fighting over who got to mentor who.

"More news! You can fight over them later! Now, many of you know of the amazingly gorgeous kit called Gorgeouskit. She is too pretty to be a kit, and an apprentice! So I'm giving her her warrior name right now! Gorgeouskit, you are now known as Gorgeousleaf. Toms, you may now flirt with her without it seeming too wrong!"

"YAY!" cheered the toms. They stampeded towards Gorgeousleaf.

Gorgeousleaf purred, and batted her eyelashes (wait, do cats have eyelashes?)

The toms drooled.

Gorgeousleaf twined her tail with Bramblestar's.

The other toms pouted while Bramblestar yowled in triumph.

Squirrelflight attacked Bramblestar.

Gorgeousleaf twined her tail with Brackenfur's.

Sorreltail attacked Brackenfur.

Gorgeousleaf twined her tail with Cloudtail's.

Brightheart attacked Cloudtail.

Gorgeousleaf twined her tail with Bumblestripe's.

Dovewing attacked Bumblestripe.

Gorgeousleaf _did not_ twine her tail with Purdy's.

Purdy pouted, so Mousefur came down from the sky and attacked him.

This went on for awhile.

"I'll wait till the she-cats calm down," Gorgeousleaf surveyed the camp. It was full of mates attacking each other.


	9. YOU JUST GOT PRANKED!

"All right, listen up!" barked Blackstar. "I declare the Clans in a state of prank!"

"Huh?" Tacokit squeaked.

"We are having a prank war!" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR announced from where she sat, beside Blackstar, tails entwined.

"Hey!" DA PIE yelled. "DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR! The tree is for leaders only!"

Blackstar growled at him. "DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR is my mate. She can do what she pleases, with my permission of course." he added.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR nodded, purring.

"And I gave her permission to be up here!" Blackstar mewed.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR licked Blackstar's ear.

The leader's face spread into a grin.

"Okay, prank war begins in three, two, one!" Chucklezkit screamed.

The cats began to scream.

"YOU JUST GOT PRANKED!" Chucklezkit yelled sounding a little like Ashton Kutcher. "It already started!"

The cats screamed louder.

Then cookies fell from the sky.

"Hey, look!" Amberpaw yelled. "Rainbows and Unicorns!"

The cats stopped screaming and looked up at the sky. Rainbows streaked across the starry sky, and unicorns danced on the rainbows. "Ooh..." said the cats, awestruck.

"PRANKED!" Dewpaw cried.

"It was just a holographic projection!" Snowpaw added. He revealed a projector and switched it off.

The kits started to cry.

"Fine, fine!" Snowpaw grumbled. He switched the projector back on.

The kits stopped crying. "Ooh..." they said.

Snowpaw, Amberpaw, and Dewpaw grumbled.

Blackstar jumped off the tree and onto Rowanclaw. "Home, James!" he cried.

Rowanclaw collapsed under Blackstar's weight. "I'm Rowanclaw! And you're squishing me!" he panted.

"Whatever. Home, James!" Blackstar yelled. "DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR, darling!" he cooed. "Let us ride off into the sunset!"

"You'd get terribly burned!" Moonkit cried. "Plus, the sun isn't out right now!"

Onestar began to cry. "SOL HAS STOLEN THE SUN AGAIN!" he wailed.

All of the cats alive durning that battle where the sun had disappeared began to scream.

"It's nighttime!" Peetakit yelled.

The cats continued to freak out.

Katnisskit and Peetakit climbed up onto the tree.

"Shut up!" Katnisskit screamed.

Nobody listened.

"SILENCE IN THE NAME OF THE HUNGER GAMES!" Peetakit yowled.

The cats immediately became silent.

"It's Peeta!" cried Squirrelflight.

"Katniss!" cried Bramblestar.

"Me!" Gorgeousleaf mewed (how vain is she?).

Nobody listened to her. They were all staring at Peetakit and Katnisskit. "All hail Peetastar and Katnissstar!" The Clans mewed.

"Jayfeather, take them to Moonpool to get their leader lives!" Bramblestar mewed.

"But you're already leader!" protested Jayfeather.

"They will lead with me!" Bramblestar mewed.

"Fine!" Jayfeather yelled. He yowled up the tree. "C'mon Peetakit and Katnisskit!"

"That's Peetastar and Katnissstar to you!" Peetakit yelled.

"You haven't gotten your nine lives yet!" Jayfeather was so irritated at the moment, he threw Peetakit and Katnisskit all the way to Moonpool.

Peetakit and Katnisskit landed beside the Moonpool with a _thud_.

"Why is Jayfeather so grumpy?" asked Katnisskit.

"Because..." Peetakit got a faraway look in his eyes.

* * *

**DRAMATIC FLASHBACK**

"C'mon, Chucklezkit!" Peetakit mewed. "Let's go mess up Jayfeather's herbs!"

They ran into Jayfeather's den and stampeded over the medicine cat. Then, they messed up his herbs.

"What are you doing?!" screamed Jayfeather as Chucklezkit pounced on his juniper berries.

"This!" ChuckleZkit flung a berry at Jayfeather's chest. It exploded and spattered. "Grr..." growled Jayfeather.

Then, Peetakit ripped a marigold lead in half. Juice flew out and hit Jayfeather's eyes.

"EEK! MY EYES!" Jayefather wailed.

**END DRAMATIC FLASHBACK**

* * *

"Whoa, bro." Katnisskit mewed, awestruck.

"I know, bro."

"I'm a sis."

"Whatevs."

Then Jayfeather arrived.

"Drink a few drops than go to sleep!" ordered Jayfeather.

"Okay!" Katnisskit and Peetakit drank some of the water.

Then they fell asleep.

All of StarClan was there.

Lionheart stepped up to Peetakit. "I give you a life for good looks!"

Peetakit had never looked so hot.

"I give you a life for amazingness!" Silverstream high-pawed Katnisskit.

"I give you both a life for epicness!" Firestar mewed.

This went on and on for a while.

It took them seven days and eight nights to receive all of their lives. And StarClan did not stop for breaks.

Both of the kits received 5,000,001 lives.

"We are amazing!" screamed Peetastar.

* * *

Peetastar, Katnissstar, and Jayfeather padded back into camp. They stopped dead at the sight before them.

"OMG." Jayfeather said.

"You can see?" Peetastar stared at him, surprised.

"I see what I want to see, okay?" Jayfeather sobbed. "Don't judge me!" he ran into his den.

"Okay..." Katnissstar mewed.

Peetastar surveyed the camp. "It's like a war zone in here!" he exclaimed.

"It _is_ a war zone." Katnissstar mewed.

Bramblestar was in Air Force One, dropping grenades on camp.

Lionblaze and Cloudtail were attacking each other, claws unsheathed.

Snowpaw and Dewpaw were singing war songs by a campfire.

Snapkit, Cracklekit, and Popkit were holding a funeral for a half-eaten Rice Krispie Treat. Chucklezkit stood behind them, looking very pleased with himself.

"We will miss you, Ricey!" sobbed Cracklekit. She was wearing a black dress with a veil over her head.

_Wait, since when was Cracklekit married_? Peetastar thought.

"You were a good friend." Snapkit gently patted the Rice Krispie Treat.

Popkit seemed too overwhelmed with sadness to do anything.

"Holy Hunger Games, what has happened here?" Katnissstar shook her head.

"The Prank War happened." Amberpaw mewed. "Come with me, and I'll explain everything."

Peetastar and Katnissstar followed her out of camp to a sheltered spot in their territory.

"So, can you please explain what's happened here?" Peetastar begged.

"Yeah. Like I said, the Prank War happened," Amberpaw mewed.

"What happened after the Gathering?" asked Katnissstar.

"Oh, the usual. A RiverClan apprentice fell off the tree-bridge and nearly drowned, then Onestar leaped in after him and saved him, and saved him-"

"Wait, why did _Onestar_ save him? Since when did WindClan know how to swim?" Peetastar gasped.

"Since Mistystar started dating Onestar." Amberpaw mewed calmly.

"What?" Katnissstar mewed, surprised.

"Yeah."

"Awkward..." Peetastar muttered.

Then Blackstar and DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR rode Rowanclaw back to ShadowClan. I think I heard some of Rowanclaw's bones cracked."

"Ew..." Katnissstar shrunk away.

"Yeah." Amberpaw mewed. "Now, settle down. I've got a week's worth of stories in store for you."


	10. Prank War Day 1

"I am Sexystar, king of SexyClan!" screamed Cloudtail.

"All hail Sexystar!" cried the Clan. They bowed to him, then began to carry him on their shoulders.

"IT'S A PRANK!" yowled Cloudtail.

The Clan dropped him on the ground, then trampled all over him.

"Ow..." Cloudtail curled up in a tiny ball. ''I wish I hadn't pranked them..." he was hurt all over.

Then, Gorgeousleaf stood over him. She licked him.

Cloudtail's eyes turned to hearts. "I LOVE YOU GORGEOUSLEAF!"

Suddenly, Gorgeousleaf unzipped herself.

Cloudtail gasped.

It was Brightheart. "HOW DARE YOU!" she screamed. She clawed at him. Then walked away. Then came back. "Oh, yeah, you just got PUNK'D!"

"Since when did you watch that show?" Cloudtail curled up into a tighter ball.

Brightheart did not answer him. She walked away.

* * *

Jayfeather ran out of the medicine den. "I CAN SEE!" he screamed.

Bramblestar ran over to him. "Prove it." he challenged. "What color are my shoes?"

"Um, cats don't wear shoes. So, your answer is they have no color."

"CORRECT!" Bramblestar screamed. "OMG IT'S A MEDICAL MIRACLE! PRAISE STARCLAN!" he ran out of camp.

Jayfeather rolled his eyes. "YOU JUST GOT PRANKED!" he screamed.

Bramblestar came back to camp pouting.

"Idiot." Jayfeather muttered.

* * *

"So that's why I didn't see him at all during the ceremony!" Peetastar mewed.

Amberpaw growled. "Shush! Don't interrupt me!"

* * *

"Heehee." Sugarkit, Candykit, Happykit, and Rainbowkit giggled. They grabbed the four cans of shaving cream they found in the bathroom (AKA the dirtplace). They sprayed Bramblestar's den with shaving cream as he slept.

When Bramblestar woke up, he looked around and screamed. "HELP HELP!" he screamed running out of the den. He slipped, and fell off Highledge.

And this is how Bramblestar lost his first life.

* * *

Sugarkit, Candykit, Happykit, and Rainbowkit looked at each other.

"We need to clean this up mess." Candykit mewed.

"Oh yeah." Happykit surveyed the den.

"Hide the evidence!" growled Rainbowkit.

"Let's get to work, soldiers." Sugarkit passed out cleaning supplies.

* * *

"Are you okay, Bramblestar?" Leafpool mewed (because of Bramblestar's stupidity, Jayfeather had refused to nurse him back to health, so Leafpool took over)

"NO!" he wailed. "MY DEN IS FULL OF SHAVING CREAM!"

"Did you have a bad dream?" Leafpool mewed anxiously.

"NO!" screamed Bramblestar.

"Does he have a concussion?" asked Briarlight anxiously.

"I don't know..." Leafpool shrugged.

"No, I'm telling the truth! Come look!" Bramblestar ran out of the medicine den and into his den. The Clan followed.

There was no shaving cream. And it was clean. In fact, it was so clean it sparkled.

"Mommy, our leader's gone mad." Candykit squeaked, falsely worried.

"What are we going to do?" Sugarkit began to fake-cry. Her sisters/partners-in-crime soon followed.

"Hush, hush, little ones. It'll be all right." Ferncloud soothed. Then she glared at the Clan. "Move Bramblestar away! Ship him to a mental asylum!"

"YOU JUST GOT PRANKED!" screamed the four she-kits.

Ferncloud glared at her kits. "How dare you..."

Bramblestar began to cry. "Pranked by the kits of my own Clan..." he blubbered.

And that was day one.


	11. Prank War Day 2

"Hum-dee-dum." Jayfeather was sorting herbs.

"C'mon, do it." Dovewing whispered.

"Fine!" Ivypool mewed. She ran down the fern tunnel. "Jayfeather!" she mewed. "It's Half Moon. Will you marry me?"

"YES!" screamed Jayfeather.

"Oh, whoops, sorry..." Ivypool grinned. "I'm not Half Moon. YOU JUST GOT PRANKED!" she ran out of the den.

Jayfeather slumped onto the ground and began to cry.

* * *

"Serves him right for leaving the ceremony!" Peetastar yelled.

"Again, no interrupting!" Amberpaw snapped.

* * *

"I'm a lion, hear me roar!" Chucklezkit yelled. Then he made a soft "squeak!" sounding more cute than scary.

The kits and Bramblestar began to scream. They ran to Ferncloud.

"Mommy, there's a lion in camp!" wailed Bramblestar, sucking on his paw.

"Yeah. I'm scared!" added Hungrykit. "And hungry."

"Okay, first things first. Bramblestar, I am not your mommy. If you have fears, share it with Squirrelflight. And two..." she stormed out of nursery. "Chucklezkit, I have had enough with your nonsense! Stop it right now!"

"But Mom, I'm just getting started!" complained Chucklezkit.

"But now you're finished. You're coming back to the nursery for a time-out." Ferncloud picked him up and barged him through the entrance of the nursery.

Only four words went through that kit's head as Ferncloud set up his time-out. _Oh no I'm not._

That evil kit.

* * *

Lionblaze padded into camp, reading Twilight. "Shiny, sparkly vampires!" he screamed. "OMG Edward is so hawt! Team Edward FOREVA!"

He got stampeded by a horde of "Team Jacob" fans.

"Werewolves are better than vampires!" yelled Blossomfall (a random Jacob supporter).

"You just got pranked!" Lionblaze mewed (not really, he was just saying that to subdue the angry mob).

He got stampeded by "Team Edward" fans.

"Okay, okay! I PRANKED ALL OF YOU!" Lionblaze yelled, wishing that this would be done. He got stampeded by all of the Twilight fans.

Cloudtail walked by. "Haha!" he teased.

Lionblaze growled. "Hey, look, Cloudtail! It's Gorgeousleaf!"

Cloudtail looked around."Where? Where?"

"YOU JUST GOT PRANKED!" cried Lionblaze.

"Poop you."

* * *

It was the middle of the night.

Chucklezkit slipped out of the nursery. He had spent his whole time-out coming up with pranks. And he needed help executing a few of them. He exited camp, wary of the guard, Thornclaw. But the stupid tom had fallen asleep on the job. Chucklezkit ran into the forest, but not before taking a Sharpie and drawing on Thornclaw's face. Then he padded towards the Thunderpath. But he didn't cross it. He dug a tunnel downward. He dug until he reached his destination, an underground clubhouse called Pranksters United.

He hurried to the entrance. "Password?" an electronic voice asked.

"I solemnly swear I am up to no good."

"Hello, Chucklezkit. The others are in the clubhouse." the doors swung open.

Chucklezkit stepped inside the pranking headquarters.

"Hey, Chucklezkit!" one of the four members of the club, Crazykit of WindClan, greeted him.

"Hey, Crazykit. Where are the others?" Chucklezkit called.

"In the office, arguing." Crazykit mewed.

"Thanks." Chucklezkit bounded towards the "Argument Office". "Oh, hey, Crazykit, meet me in the Meeting Room in five minutes."

"Sure thing, dude." Crazykit ran off.

Chucklezkit took a deep breath and opened up the door to "Argument Office".

"I'm telling you, it was a good prank! I dyed Blackstar's paws white! So now he has to be called Whitestar!"

"Wildkit, that's stupid compared to what I did. I actually convinced Mistystar that there were sharks in our water sources!"

"You're going to kill your Clanmates, if they don't think they can drink. Our main purpose is to annoy, not kill!" Wildkit sniffed. "How could you be so stupid, Donutkit?"

"You've got a point." Donutkit pouted. "Shoot, now I've got to go tell the Clan." he stood up, preparing to leave.

"Wait! Donutkit, before you leave, I need you to follow me to the Meeting Room," Chucklezkit mewed. "You too, Wildkit," he added.

"Sure, Chucklezkit." Donutkit and Wildkit promised unanimously.

Chucklezkit bounded to the Meeting Room.

Crazykit was already there.

"So, what's the meeting about?" Wildkit asked, once they all got settled.

"I have all these pranks running through my head. But I need some items to help me."

"Spill the beans, dude." Donutkit mewed. "What do you need?"

Chucklezkit grinned evilly. "A whoopie cushion, a Rice Krispie Treat, a shoebox, a bucket of marbles, a truckload of banana peels, and rollerblades."

"And this is why we named you the president of Pranksters United," Donutkit mewed.

Chucklezkit let out an evil laugh. "Tee-hee!"

* * *

**I NEED PRANK IDEAS! Help me...**

**If I don't come up with ideas, I may start skipping days! (Dun, dun, dun) **


	12. Prank War Day 3

"Okay, Chucklezkit, what's the plan again?" Awesomekit squeaked.

Chucklezkit face-pawed. "No wonder you weren't selected for Pranksters United."

"What?"

"Never mind."

"Okay!" Chucklezkit whispered the plan to his brother once more.

"Ooh..." Awesomekit mewed. He grabbed the rollerblades and strapped them to his feet. Then he hurried over to the banana peels that Chucklezkit had gotten. He dumped them all around the camp. And then he put a big trail of marbles all the way to the lake.

The Clan woke up and padded out of the dens. Then they slipped. They screamed, and skidded out of camp. Then they rolled on the marbles. They rolled and rolled until they reached the lake. They skidded along the shore and fell into the lake.

"We can't swim!" wailed Bramblestar. "We're gonna die!"

"Try standing up!" Spoilerkit screamed (Oh, did I mention that Ferncloud had yet another litter if kits? Only two this time. Spoilerkit and Discokit.).

"CURSE YOU SPOILERKIT!" Chucklezkit yelled.

"I SPOIL THINGS!" Spoilerkit cackled. Then he ran away.

Bramblestar stood up. "Thanks, Spoilerkit!" he yelled. He stood up. "CHUCKLEZKIT, I BANISH YOU FROM THIS CLAN!"

"Then I'll go to ShadowClan and prank you from there!"

"NOO!" Bramblestar cried. "Okay, you can stay!"

"I thought so."

* * *

"Okay..." Lionblaze hummed. He pulled out a large bottle of superglue. Then he dumped it on the floor of Jayfeather's den, and spread it out, so it was covering the whole den. Then he ran out.

Jayfeather ran back to his den. He shook himself dry, still fuming over Chucklezkit's earlier prank. He tried to move. But he couldn't. He screeched. Then he sniffed the air. "LIONBLAZE!" he screeched.

Lionblaze ran into the den. "HAHA!" he cried. "You just got pranked!" he tried to run out of the den. But then he got stuck too.

"DUMB BLONDE!" yelled Jayfeather (I mean no offense to blondes. It's just that on those TV shows, the blondie is always one of the dumbest on the show).

"I'm golden!" puffed Lionblaze.

"DUMB GOLDEN!" yelled Jayfeather.

"That doesn't have the same effect." Lionblaze sorted. "That doesn't sound right."

Jayfeather pouted.

An emergency crew came and unstuck them.

* * *

"Hey, she-cats!" yelled Moleohimustbecomingdownwitha cold. "Justin Bieber's in the dirtplace!"

"OMG!" screamed Ivypool. She lead the she-cats into the dirtplace. There was no Justin Bieber. Instead, stink bombs were there.

"Oh no." Dovewing groaned.

"Look! It's the Stinkies, live on tour!" Moleohimustbecomingdownwitha cold yowled triumphantly.

"AHH!" the she-cats screamed as the stink bombs erupted.

They stormed out of the den, smelling horrible. They ran over to Moleohimustbecomingdownwitha cold.

"How could you?" growled Cherrypie.

Moleohimustbecomingdownwitha cold remained calm. "Berrynose made me."

The she-cats needed no more evidence. They stampeded towards Berrynose and attacked him.

* * *

**StarClan...**

"Oh, I hope Berrynose doesn't die!" fretted Frostfur.

Yellowfang sat beside her. "Well, I suppose it's normal to be worried about your kin's mate-"

"No, it's not that!" Frostfur whimpered. "If he dies, we'll suffer from his annoyingness!"

"Then it's settled," Yellowfang mewed. "If Berrynose dies, he'll go to the Dark Forest."

* * *

**The Dark Forest...**

"NO! NOT BERRYNOSE! WHAT DID WE EVER DO TO YOU TO DESERVE SUCH HORROR?!"

* * *

**Back on land...**

"Hey, look! "Gullible" is written on the ceiling!" Chucklezkit mewed to Discokit.

Discokit looked up at the sky. "Where? Where?"

"Fool." Chucklezkit walked away.


	13. Prank War Day 4- A New cat Introducing-

******Okay, I just realized I haven't done a disclaimer yet for this story! O.o I feel so dumb. Whatevs! I'll just do it now.**

******Disclaimer: I don't own Warriors, Oreos, Gangham Style, Harry Potter, The Hunger Games, Twilight, Fernlight, or the disco (does anyone really own the disco?). The only things I do own include all of the DAs, Ferncloud's kits, Gorgeousleaf, and Chucklezkit.**

* * *

DA PIE was sleeping in his den. Yes, his den. Bramblestar had given him his own den because he thought that the ThunderClan warriors were too annoying for his taste.

"All right let's go. He's asleep." Cloudtail whispered. He led Snowpaw and Dewpaw into the deputy's den. They placed pies on the floor. They wanted to see what happened once DA PIE ate the pies. If their hypothesis was correct, they would be responsible for a giant mess. And they wanted to do that. That would be known as the prank of the century. Once they were finished, they ran out of the den.

DA PIE woke up. As soon as he spotted the pies, his eyes became extremely wide and got this insane look. He gobbled up the pies.

And his den exploded.

* * *

******StarClan...**

"WHY DID THAT HAPPEN?!" roared Yellowfang. "Why can't the Clans listen to our instructions on not giving DA PIE pies?!"

"What instructions?" Bluestar asked.

Yellowfang rounded on the former leader. "Tell me you're joking." she hissed.

"Huh?"

"Tell me you're joking. Tell me that you gave Jayfeather the instructions for DA PIE."

"I was, but then I forgot."

"YOU WHAT?!"

"Yay! Dramatic flashback time!" cried Mosskit.

* * *

___Jayfeather fell asleep. He awoke in a lush, green forest. "Oh boy, another omen. Where are you, dream-summoner?"_

___"Here!" Bluestar appeared._

___"What is it this time?" Jayfeather grumbled. "What stupid prophecy this time? What stinkin' omen must I listen to?"_

___Bluestar blinked at him. "I don't remember."_

___"Then why am I here?"_

___"I don't know."_

___"I want an answer."_

___"Wanna party?"_

___"Okay!"_

* * *

"What the..." Oakheart gasped. "Why wasn't I invited to this party?"

"I don't know." Bluestar mewed stupidly.

"I want an answer."

"I don't know."

"Not the answer I'm looking for."

"Wanna party now?"

"Okay!" Oakheart began to do the disco. "Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo!"

Yellowfang face-pawed. "Foolish cats."

* * *

******Back on land...**

DA PIE had blown up Bramblestar's den.

* * *

******A random break from pranking...**

A very pretty she-cat emerged from the ashes of Bramblestar's den.

"Hey, gorgeous, what's yo name?" Thornclaw wolf-whistled.

"Fernlight." the she-cat shook out her fluffy silver fur. "OMG, ashes do not do good things for the fur."

"You still look beautiful!" Cloudtail reassured her quickly. Brightheart slapped him with her tail.

Gorgeousleaf hurried out of the warriors den. "Who are you? What are you doing here? I'M SUPPOSED TO BE THE PRETTY ONE!" she wailed.

Fernlight purred. "Oh, sweetie, I've taken over that title!" she flicked her tail at the drooling toms. "Don't you see?"

"I see, but I don't like it!" Gorgeousleaf snapped.

"I can't expect you to. In fact, I don't think that you have the brain to understand that your title's been taken over! Pretty does not always mean smart, you know. But of course, I'm an exception." she batted her eyelashes.

"Can I be your mate?" Bramblestar called out.

"Yeah, sure!" Gorgeousleaf purred.

"Oh, no, I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to the smokin' babe standing next to you!" Bramblestar mewed.

"Sure, Brambley!" Fernlight purred.

"But I want to be your mate!" Graystripe protested.

"Me too!" Lionblaze cried.

"Me three!"

"Me four!"

"I call her!"

"I call her, no callbacks!"

"I call her for infinity, no callbacks!"

Fernlight purred. "I guess we'll have a sign-up sheet." she grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and threw them into the crowd of drooling toms. They immediately began to argue over who got the sign-up sheet first.

"See ya 'round, Un-Gorgeousleaf." Fernlight sashayed away.

Gorgeousleaf pouted.

* * *

"This should be funny!" Chucklezkit grabbed Hungrykit's box of Oreos and a tube of toothpaste. Then he unscrewed the Oreos, licked the creamy filling from them, and replaced it with toothpaste. Then he placed them back in their container and walked away.

* * *

"I'm hungry. Where did I put my Oreos?" Hungrykit sniffed. "Oh, there!" he spotted the container. He opened it up, grabbed an Oreo, and popped it in his mouth.

* * *

******Five seconds later...**

"EWW! I just swallowed toothpaste! Call poison control!"

Chucklezkit yowled in triumph.

* * *

**EDIT: I am no longer accepting OCs, as I have said for a while now.**


	14. Prank War Day 5! More New Cats!

It was the middle of the night. And Snowpaw, Amberpaw, and Dewpaw crept out of the apprentices den, carrying rolls of toilet paper. They grinned at one another.

"All right, let's get to it." Amberpaw whispered. She tossed a toilet paper roll at the warriors den. It unrolled and it got caught in the brambles. The three apprentices threw all the toilet paper they had. Then they silly-stringed the den. Then they egged it. Then they covered the entrance in cobwebs. Then they ran away.

* * *

**In the morning...**

"Hum-dee-dum." Dovewing walked out of the warriors den. She walked right through the cobwebs. "Ew, ew!" she screamed. "Cobwebs are all over my face! EW! Help me!" she ran around in circles.

Jayfeather ran out of the medicine den. "EW!" he wailed. "THAT'S DISGUSTING!" he fainted.

Rainbowkit grabbed a Sharpie and drew a mustache and eyebrows onto Jayfeather. "HAHA!" she yelled.

Lionblaze dumped a bucket of cold water on Jayfeather's head. He woke up. "Whoa." Jayfeather twiddled his Sharpie mustache. "What happened? Wait... since when did I have a mustache?"

"Since I drew it on you!" Rainbowkit squealed.

Jayfeather screamed some more and fainted again.

Then, there was a _clip-clop. Clip-clop, clip-clop!_ A pretty golden she-cat had ridden a horse into camp.

"What the..." Bramblestar whispered. Jayfeather awoke and had yet another freak-out.

The golden-furred cat leaped off the horse and shooed it away. "I am Goldenwing!"

"All hail Goldenwing!" the cats bowed to her.

"And this is my Chapstick!" Goldenwing held up a tube of strawberry Chapstick. "All hail the great Strawberry Chapstick!" the cats bowed some more.

Lionblaze, entranced, walked up to Goldenwing. "Can I touch it?" he whispered.

"No." Goldenwing whacked Lionblaze on the head.

"Pooey."

"Now, let's dance to Gangnum Style in honor of Goldenwing's arrival!" Bramblestar had recently downloaded the Gangnum Style song onto his iPhone. So the kits could listen to the song.

"Let's boogie!" cried Squirrelflight as the first line of the music blared from the speakers. "OPA GANGNUM STYLE!"

They danced for an hour.

* * *

"Boy, am I pooped," Squirrelflight murmured. "Time to nap!" she walked off towards the warriors den.

"Haha!" Seedpaw and Lilypaw giggled. They had filled the warriors den with laughing gas.

As soon Squirrelflight entered the den, she began to giggle. "Tee-hee!"

She walked out of the warriors den. She began to laugh. "Haha!"

She began laughing so hard she collapsed. "HAHAHAHA!" she screamed, rolling on the ground.

The cats began to stare at her.

"That is one insane cat." Fernlight and Goldenwing stared at her.

"Yeah." Goldenwing nodded.

Then, Gorgeousleaf leaped on Fernlight. "YOU STOLE MY TITLE!" she screamed. The battling duo writhed and screeched, and rolled away from Goldenwing.

"Wow." Goldenwing shook her head.

Lionblaze appeared behind her. "You came in the middle of a prank war!" he mewed cheerily. "Now...can I touch your chapstick?"

"NO!" Goldenwing smacked him.

* * *

"WATER BALLOON FIGHT!" cried Bramblestar. He ran into his den and brought out packages of water balloons. "Every cat gets a pack of balloons! We are fighting against the other Clans! One hit and you're out! Go over to the hoses!" he took his pack and ran to the "Hose Station". "Make your forts in the forest! Every tom for themselves!" he finished filling up his balloons and ran out of camp.

The Clan stared.

"That looks like fun!" cried Lionblaze. He filled up his balloons and ran into the forest.

The Clan soon followed.

* * *

"So, young'un, did I ever tell you about the story where I..." Purdy was talking to a tree, when a wrinkly old cat lumbered up.

"I am Freakishlyoldface. Have you seen my rainbows?"

"Huh?" Purdy turned from the tree. "Oh, hi there!"

"Hi. So, have you seen my rainbows?"

"No, but I have stories that I can tell you stories about rainbows!"

"No thanks." Freakishlyoldface walked off.

* * *

"All right, Dovewing, we'll go on ShadowClan's land and get them first. Remember, one hit rule!" Ivypool cackled (Ivypool and Dovewing had teamed up, as you can tell).

"Okay!" Dovewing sent out her special senses. "So, the closest ShadowClan cat to us is..." she paused. "Some cat that I've never seen before."

"Whatever!" Ivypool mewed. "Where is he?"

"It's a she, I think. And she's near the border."

"Okay, let's go!" Ivypool began to charge.

"SURPRISE!" they screamed as soon as they saw the cat. They both launched a water balloon at her. They missed.

The she-cat screeched in surprise, her eyes wide with fear. Then she sniffed the air, looked at the ThunderClan she-cats. "Oh, joy. ThunderClan fools." she went up to them, took out a pair of nunchucks, and used them to spank the two she-cats.

"What the..." Dovewing gasped.

"How random was that?" breathed Ivypool. "Is that even how you use nunchucks?"

"You're supposed to use water balloons, not weapons!" Dovewing whimpered in pain.

"Oh, right." the she-cat pulled out two water balloons, and dropped one on each sister. "Bye now." she began to walk away.

"Wait! What's your name?" Dovewing asked.

"Shadowheart."

"Nice to meet you!" Ivypool grumbled.

"Yeah, lovely. If I ever see you two again, it'll be too soon." Shadowheart unsheathed her claws.

"Those are bigger than Tigerstar's! And Scourge's! Oh my StarClan, those must be the biggest claws I've ever seen!" Ivypool breathed.

"Thanks." Shadowheart hissed. "I'm proud to have such long claws." she observed them. "And sharp, too."

"Well, we'll be, um, going now..." Dovewing stood up.

"That'd be a great idea."

The two she-cats staggered away, defeated.

* * *

**Meanwhile...**

Lionblaze had borrowed a tank and had water-bombed the Clans.

In conclusion, he won the water-balloon fight.

* * *

ThunderClan had a victory meal to celebrate Lionblaze's win. What they didn't know was that Chucklezkit had injected everything with hot sauce.

"AHHH! MY MOUTH IS ON FIRE!"

* * *

**Remember, you can still suggest cats! But please fill in the form-type thingy that is on chapter thirteen! And, if I've already used your charcter, please review and tell me if your character has been potrayed correctly.**

**I NEED MORE REVIEWS *Gets insane look in eyes* Thanks! All righty... ready, set, review! I'll give you a cake if you do...**

**WARNING: If you do not review, Hungrykit will eat all of your cake that I have made for you. He will also eat your Oreos!**

**Have a good day!**

**-Chucklez**


	15. Prank War Day 6- The Big Prank

**Thank you, my wonderful reviewers! VIRTUAL CAKE FOR ALL! *Throws virtual cake into the crowd***

**Please note that if you sent in a cat and I haven't used it yet, I will in future chapters. This chapter was written before I had said you could suggest cats, and I was really busy, so I couldn't post it. You have not been forgotten!**

* * *

"All right..." Chucklezkit mewed. He grabbed the Rice Krispie Treat. "Let the plan begin." he walked out of the den.

"Hey, Snapkit! Cracklekit! Popkit!" he yowled. "Look, it's a Rice Krispie Treat!"

"OMG that's so cool. Hey, Chucklezkit, can we have it?" asked Snapkit.

"Sure!" Chucklezkit grinned.

"Yay!" Popkit grabbed it from him and began cradling in his arms. "I'll name him Ricey!"

Chucklezkit grinned. It felt so good to have dumb littermates.

"Can I marry him?" asked Cracklekit. "Do what you want, I don't care." Chucklezkit mewed, trying to sound bored.

"YAY!" Cracklekit mewed. Then there was a big poof.

The Clans were in a church.

Chucklezkit's eyes widened. "Oh, great StarClan!" he breathed. _All the better for the plan._

Cracklekit was in a wedding gown. The Rice Krispie treat was in a tuxedo. Ferncloud was sobbing in the front row. "My little daughter's all grown up!"

"Geez." Chucklezkit huffed.

"Yo, yo, yo peeps!" the minister stepped onto the stage.

"What the..." Hungrykit was the minister.

"Now, dearly beloved... oh, oops, I forget the rest of the speech, so can I please have the rings?"

The ring bearer... Bramblestar... ran up to Hungrykit and handed him the rings. Then he ran off. "Kay, thanks, Brambley. Now, Ricey, put the ring on Cracklekit's claw." Hungrykit ordered. Ricey did not move. "He's got stage fright, or something like that. He's paralyzed in fear. I'll put on the ring." Popkit grabbed the ring and placed it on Cracklekit's claw.

"Now, Cracklekit."

Cracklekit took the second ring and then tried to find Ricey's paw. After ten minutes, she gave up and placed it on his head.

"Good! Now, groom, you may lick the bride!" Ricey did not move. So Cracklekit leaned forward and licked him. The Clans cheered. Chucklezkit snorted. _This is ridiculous._ It was already getting out-of-hand.

"I call for a toast in congratulations to the newlyweds!" Snapkit cheered. Chucklezkit shifted around in his seat. It was almost time for part two of his plan.

"Anyone else have toasts?" Bramblestar asked.

"Me!" Chucklezkit yowled. "I give a toast to life..." he hurried over to "Ricey". "And death!" he bit a chunk off of Ricey.

"YOU CANNIBAL!" screamed Popkit. Cracklekit burst into tears.

"It's a Rice Krispie Treat!" screamed Chucklezkit as the dining hall exploded into a panic. "It was meant to be eaten!"

Snapkit, Cracklekit, and Popkit wailed in sadness.

The rest of the dining hall quieted down. "Okay." said Bramblestar. He walked out of the room. And everyone else except for Snapkit, Cracklekit, Popkit, and Chucklezkit.

"YOU KILLED MY HUSBAND!" screamed Cracklekit.

Chucklezkit yawned. "See if I care. It was a Rice Krispie Treat!" The three kits burst into tears once more.

"We must hold a wake, and a funeral!" whimpered Cracklekit.

Chucklezkit groaned. "Oh no."

There was another poof. The Clans were there again, this time, they were at a funeral home. The cats were offering their condolences to Snapkit, Cracklekit, and Popkit.

"Well, it'll all be worth it in the end. This is the biggest prank I've pulled off." Chucklezkit mumbled to himself as he watched Ferncloud hug the three kits. Once that was done, they had the funeral. They were supposed to bury him, but Snapkit, Cracklekit, and Popkit would not let him be buried.

So they went back to camp and the kits cried over the Rice Krispie Treat some more.

Although Chucklezkit was rather annoyed about how extreme this had become, he was very pleased at how successful it had been.

Again, _that evil kit._

* * *

**I definitely went overboard with this O.o. Oh well, the randomer the better, right?**


	16. Prank War Day 7- The Last Day!

**Wow. So many people want in on the whole "pretty kitty" business. Well, okay then... O.o. Anyways, you can still suggest cats, but I'm getting so many, the character(s) may not come up for awhile. Anyways, this chapter was pre-written before many people suggested cats. I have just been so busy, and I haven't had much time to update more than one chapter at a time.**

* * *

Jayfeather sprinted back to the Moonpool. He had a feeling that Peetakit's and Katnisskit's leader ceremony would be over soon. And he was right. The StarClan cats were just giving the two kits their last five hundred lives.

* * *

Just as the Clan began waking up, DA PIE ran into the camp screaming. "Help me, help me!" he wailed.

Wiley Coyote was running after him.

The cats stared.

"What... isn't Wiley Coyote's enemy Road Runner?" Sorreltail mewed, confused.

"Plus, why is Wiley just running after DA PIE?" Dovewing asked.

"DA PIE, what did you do to anger Wiley Coyote?" Lionblaze puffed.

"NOTHING!" screamed DA PIE, running out of camp.

Rainbowkit ran after them with one of those big Whack-A-Mole hammer thingies you see in cartoons, and whacked Wiley Coyote. His head smashed into the dirt. He struggled to get his head out, which gave them time to escape.

* * *

**StarClan...**

"Dang it, it didn't work!" a ginger tom with a white muzzle, paws, and tail-tip, cursed.

Yellowfang popped up behind him (WHAT a stalker!). "What didn't work, Foxstar?" she asked him.

"THIS!" there was a _poof_, and a holographic projector appeared.

"YAY!" Mosskit squealed. ''Another dramatic flashback!"

* * *

_"The DAs think they're so great. Well, I'm gonna set them straight!" Foxstar grinned evilly._

_Whitestorm appeared behind him. "Hey, that rhymes!" _

_"Whatever." Foxstar grumbled. "Hey! I know! I'll call up my good friend Wiley Coyote and __get him to attack them!"_

* * *

"Oh my gosh." Mosskit mewed. "That was crazy random!"

* * *

"Now, DA PIE, are you all right?" Leafpool asked.

"Well, I am a bit shaken up," DA PIE mewed slowly.

"Come, let's get some thyme leaves," Leafpool mewed. She hurried into Jayfeather's den. "Thyme, thyme, thyme..." Leafpool murmured, scanning the den for the right leaves. "There!" she hurried over to the herbs. She unsheathed her claws to snag a few leaves. But when she tried to grab them, they were stuck to the ground. "What the..." she whispered. She tried some more. They were stuck. She ran out of the den. "Guys, guys!" she called. "The herbs are stuck!"

"So are the nests!" Seedpaw responded. "My mentor wanted me to clean the nursery, and when I tried to remove the dirty moss, I couldn't move it!"

"Who on earth is responsible for this?" roared Bramblestar.

Nobody answered.

"Fine. If you're going to be silent, then I will force the truth out of you!" Bramblestar growled. There was a _poof_, and Air Force One appeared, along with a pile of grenades. "Yay!" he cried. He then took the grenades and ran into the plane. Then he began to fly it. He then dropped a grenade.

"Yesh!" Snowpaw and Dewpaw whooped. "We can finally sing our war songs!" they then built a campfire and began singing.

And then, Superkit and Kittykit brought out ketchup packets and began pouncing on them, and kept spraying the Clan with ketchup.

"HEY!" screamed Cloudtail. And then he grinned wickedly. "Brightheart! Brightheart!" he wailed. "Help me! I'm bleeding!''

Brightheart, who had been running around the lake, charged into camp. "Where? Where? Are you okay, Cloudtail?" she stopped dead when she saw all the 'blood' on Cloudtail's pelt. "Oh, my!" she began to lick the 'blood' off him. "Hey... this tastes like ketchup!"

"Oh yeah! You just got pranked!" Cloudtail did a victory dance.

"Oh, look over there! It's Fernlight!" Brightheart mewed.

Cloudtail whipped his head around. "Where? Where?"

"Prank!" yelled Brightheart. Fernlight and Gorgeousleaf growled. "You don't kid about beauty!" They attacked Brightheart.

* * *

Seedpaw borrowed a trash truck filled with snow and dumped it on Lilypaw.

Lilypaw got revenge by dumping cakes on Seedpaw.

"Curse you Lilypaw!" screamed Seedpaw. She took a bit of cake frosting and licked it. "Hey, this is pretty good! Thanks, Lilypaw!"

Lilypaw pouted.

* * *

The rest of the day was rather uneventful, except for the fact that Chucklezkit used an atomic Whoopee Cushion and blew up the Clans. And Bramblestar continued to drop grenades. And Snapkit, Cracklekit, and Popkit grieved for the Rice Krispie Treat some more.

* * *

"Wow..." Peetastar mewed. "We missed so much!"

"Yeah, you did." Amberpaw nodded. "Now, let's go back to camp."

"Yeah." Kanissstar mewed. "We've got to stop all of this." she ran back to camp, Peetastar and Amberpaw following.

And then, Bramblestar accidentally dropped a grenade on Peetastar and Katnissstar, so they lost all the lives but one. They became kits a again.

What a waste of lives.

* * *

**So, that's the prank days! But I got one suggestion that involves pranks, so this isn't over! *Dramatic music plays***

**Please note that if a cat that you suggested hasn't been used, know that it will. I either had this chapter written, or I am just waiting for the right time to use it.**

**Thank you, Fernlight! You've given me so many ideas! Also, I want to thank...**

**-Pixelfire**

**-CinderxLion00**

**Cloudysorm123, I will make chapters for RichClan, but not right now. Since RichClan isn't part of the original Clans, and your request came in rather late, I'll do some seperate chapters for RichClan.**


	17. FLASHBACK! Dun, dun, dun

"Okay, kitties! Since we hypnotized the cats of the Clans, we'll hypnotize ourselves, The Tribe of Rushing Water, Rock, and Midnight!" cried Yellowfang. "We need to be more exciting, because that will also make everyone else more excting!"

In conclusion, everyone became hypnotized.

* * *

"Okay, cats of all Clans! We are going to perform a dramatic re-enactment of the events that happened around the time when Firestar came to the Clan!" Bluestar cried. "Please turn your attention to the big screen!"

"A dramatic flashback!" Mosskit squealed. "YES!"

* * *

"Dang it!" Mousefur grumbled. "I lost a claw!"

"Oh no!" Tigerclaw wailed. "Go back to camp! Spottedleaf shall heal you."

"Very well." Mousefur limped off.

Tigerclaw watched Mousefur leave, then jumped back into the mass of battling cats.

"Tigerclaw!" gasped Redtail. "We must retreat! HarryPotterClan will honor your courage, but we cannot afford to lose more cats!"

"But we can!" Tigerclaw hissed. "Ravenpaw, go back to camp."

Ravenpaw ran away.

"You have been deputy for too long!" Tigerclaw growled. "Your time is over, old man!"

"You're older than me!" Redtail hissed.

"Whatever." Tigerclaw killed Redtail.

* * *

"Spottedleaf, will Mousefur be okay?" Bluestar asked.

"Yeah. I gave her a Band-Aid, and sent her on her way."

"You are truly gifted, Spottedleaf."

"Thanks." then, Spottedleaf's phone began to ring.

_Falling from cloud nine..._

"Oh, look, StarClan's calling!" Spottedleaf mewed cheerily. "Hello? StarClan? Hey! Hm? You have a prophecy, you say? Fire will save the Clan. Hm... well, thanks for calling!" she hung up and turned to Bluestar. "Fire will save the Clan."

"Okay!"

* * *

"Okay, Smudge, I have a feeling that something important is going to happen in the forest, and I like important things, so, well, I'm gonna go into the forest." Rusty mewed.

Smudge gasped. "B-b-but, I heard that they hunt things! And they eat it. And the bones!"

"Wow." Rusty sighed. "That's what cats do. Except for the bones. That's just weird."

''We do? I thought it we lazed around all day, got feed delicious rabbit-dropping-taste food, got pampered, and play with random things!"

"Well, I guess..." Rusty shrugged.

"Well, you are not a cat that eats other animals."

"Whatever. I'm still going into the forest." Rusty left.

Smudge did a slow-mo scream.

* * *

"Ooh, a mouse. I'm going to be one of those cats Smudge was talking about!" Rusty leaped at the small creature. "Oops, I missed."

A small gray cat leaped at him. "Roar!" he cried.

"Omigosh, are you one of those cats who hunt for their food?" Rusty mewed, clawing at the tom.

"Yeah!" the gray nodded, giving Rusty a swipe. "And you're one of those cats who eat rabbit-dropping-taste food?"

"Yeah!" Rusty bit the tom's ear. "I'm Rusty. What's your name?"

"Graypaw!" the tom clamped his jaws around Rusty's leg and bit down, causing Rusty to collapse.

"Nice to meet you!"

"Nice to meet you too!" Rusty purred as Graypaw battered at his belly.

"What is going on here?" a blue-gray she-cat and a magnificent gray tom appeared.

"Bluestar!" Graypaw gasped. Bluestar shook her head. "That's not what you say to me! What do you do when you begin speaking to me?"

"Oh. Right." Graypaw bowed down low. "All hail the great and mighty Bluestar!"

"Good. Now, kittypet, you look like fire. Come to my Clan! You shall save us all!" "What?" Rusty tipped his head to one side. "Well, okay."

They went back to ThunderClan.

* * *

"Okay, now, kitties, listen up! This is Rusty. He is joining our Clan!" Bluestar announced.

"Hey! You stole my cheese puffs!" Longtail screamed at Rusty.

"Nu-uh!" Rusty made a feeble attempt to hide the bag of cheese puffs he had.

Longtail attacked Rusty and pulled off his collar.

"Thanks, dude!" Rusty mewed.

"All right, your name is Firepaw." Bluestar mewed.

Then Tigerclaw burst in. "Redtail is dead!"

Everyone screamed in panic.

Bluestar named Lionheart deputy.

Tigerclaw pouted.

* * *

**Wasn't that EPIC? *bows* JK!**

**Okay, here's the deal: I will now give you BROWNIES if you review! Heehee...**


	18. The Gathering of Five Clans

**Disclaimer: I don't own warriors, Flo Rida, Wiley Coyote, or anything else. I only own Ferncloud's most recent litters of kits.**

* * *

"Okay, how was everybody's prank week?" Bramblestar asked, surveying the crowd at the Gathering.

Normal things were happening. Like, Mistystar and Onestar were licking each other, y'know, 'cuz they're mates now, Blackstar and DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR were licking each other, Fernlight and Gorgeousleaf were walking around with clipboards, taking surveys on who was prettier, Snapkit, Cracklekit, and Popkit were sobbing over the Rice Krispie Treat, Lionblaze was begging Goldenwing to let him touch her strawberry Chapstick, and twenty new cats were standing in the crowd of cats.

Okay, that's not as normal.

"Hey, newbies! Who are you?" asked Bramblestar.

"Cats!" yelled a tom.

"No way!" Kestrelflight gasped. "We're cats too!"

An elegant gray tom with a black stick-on mustache stepped up. "I am Mayorstar and this is my Clan, RichClan!"

"All hail RichClan!" the normal Clan cats went over to RichClan and bowed.

"Well, you came right in time. We're having a Flo Rida singing competition! Each Clan will sing one of his songs!" Bramblestar mewed. "WindClan is singing "Low", ShadowClan is singing "Wild Ones", RiverClan is singing "Whistle", ThunderClan is singing "I Cry", so you guys can sing "Club Can't Handle Me"! We're going to be rated on a scale from one to ten!"

"Okay!" Mayorstar fist-pumped. "A singing competition! RichClan, vocal warm-ups!" The rest of the Clans stared as RichClan did their vocal warm-ups.

"Hmm..." Littlecloud mewed.

"I don't like Justin Bieber." someone randomly said.

"Okay, WindClan, go first!" Bramblestar mewed.

Onestar had to be tugged away from Mistystar and dragged onto the stage. "I'll be back, my love!" Onestar screamed.

"Okay!" yelled Mistystar.

They sang.

And they failed.

"NEXT!" yelled Bramblestar. "You got a one."

ShadowClan sang better.

"Five point five." Bramblestar muttered.

RiverClan went next.

"Three."

ThunderClan got a nine point nine.

"Try to top that!" Bramblestar mewed smugly to Mayorstar.

"Okay."

"TEN!"

Bramblestar began to sob.

Then they talked about normal stuff. New kits, apprentices, dead elders, and whatnot.

Then the ThunderClan she-cats stood up.

"We have announcements- but mainly just for our mates." Sorreltail mewed.

"Dustpelt!" Ferncloud mewed.

"Bramblestar!" Squirrelflight purred.

"Brackenfur!" Sorreltail meowed.

"Cloudtail!" Brightheart mewed.

"Graystripe!" Millie yowled.

"Lionblaze!" announced Cinderheart.

"Berrynose!" Poppyfrost winked.

"Bumblestripe!" Dovewing mewed.

"Foxleap!" Rosepetal purred (I support this pairing. Don't judge me!).

"Birchfall!" Whitewing squealed.

"What?" the toms asked.

"We're having kits!"

The toms cheered.

Bramblestar rolled his eyes. "Squirrelflight, we're down ten warriors. Are you getting all this down?"

Squirrelflight looked up at him, rolling her eyes.

"Right. You're one of the she-cats who are going to be missing." Bramblestar grumbled. "Lionblaze, you are now my deputy. Are you getting this down?"

Lionblaze was too busy trying to touch Goldenwing's Chapstick.

"Well, more duties." Bramblestar grumbled. He took a deep breath. "Anyways, I suppose it would be awkward for Ferncloud to have three litters of kits, so well, her kits are now apprentices. I name you Rainbowpaw, Candypaw, Sugarpaw, Hurricanepaw, Sandypaw, Snappaw, Cracklepaw, Poppaw, Dustpelt-is-amazingpaw, CocoaPuffpaw, Hungrypaw, Tacopaw, Fluffypaw, Chucklezpaw, Peetapaw, Katnisspaw, Hawkpaw, Stripepaw, Awesomepaw, Ravenpaw, Barley, Kittypaw, Sexypaw, Moonpaw, Sunpaw, Starpaw, Randompaw, Crazypaw, Herbpaw, Ferncloud-the-kit-machinepaw, Epicpaw, Amazingpaw, Happypaw, Superpaw, Spoilerpaw, and Discopaw." he breathed.

"What a mouthful." somebody muttered.

Then, a ShadowClan she-cat appeared. "HI! HI! I'M HEARTSHADOW! I LIKE AWESOME THINGS, EPIC THINGS, AND TACOS!" she ran around the lake fifty times and came back to everyone staring at her.

"Blah." she said.

"Blah." Blackstar mewed.

Then Wiley Coyote came and chased the DAs. Rainbowpaw grabbed her big Whack-A-Mole type hammer and smash his head in the dirt. The DAs were safe. Foxstar had epically failed.

And then, more pretty she-cats walked in.

"I am Swiftstorm!" the first she-cat announced, a brown tortoiseshell.

"All hail Swiftstorm of ThunderClan!" the toms bowed and began flirting with her.

"And I am Sweetcat of ShadowClan!" the second cat, a silver she-cat.

"All hail Sweetcat!" the cats bowed to her.

"I am Cloudfeather of WindClan!" a pretty white-furred she-cat announced.

"All hail Cloudfeather!" the toms bowed.

ShadowClan picked up Sweetcat and carried her home.

WindClan picked up Cloudfeather and carried her home.

ThunderClan picked up Swiftstorm and carried her home.

Fernlight and Gorgeousleaf huffed.

The ThunderClan cats ran back to the two forgotten she-cats.

"Whoops." they grinned sheepishly. "ALL HAIL FERNLIGHT AND GORGEOUSLEAF!"

"Thank you." Fernlight mewed importantly.

ThunderClan picked up the two she-cats, along with Swiftstorm, and carried them home.

And that was the end of the Gathering.

* * *

**So many pregnant she-cats! O.o Anyways, I'll need help naming all of them! HINT, HINT...**

**Ferncloud: Ten kits (5 toms and 5 she-cats)**

**Brightheart: Two kits (2 she-cats)**

**Sorreltail: Five kits (4 toms and 1 she-cat)**

**Millie: Three kits (2 toms and a she-cat)**

**Poppyfrost: Two kits (A tom and a she-cat)**

**Cinderheart: Five kits (3 toms and 2 she-cats)**

**Dovewing: Three kits (2 she-cats and a tom)**

**Rosepetal: Two kits (A tom and a she-cat)**

**Squirrelflight: Three kits (2 toms and a she-cat)**

**YES, I am well aware that Erin Hunter has stated that Squirrelflight cannot have kits. But this is a fictional random story, so I can do what I want. XD**

**Anyways, please send in names! I've already got two for Ferncloud's... but I don't know how I'll name the rest of them! It can be a normal name (Mousekit), or a ridiculous name (Chucklezkit, Tacokit, Ferncloud-the-kit-machinekit).**

**Along with suggesting names, you can also suggest cats. And now, I shall give all my awesome reviewers virtual brownies! And I will give out more if you review!**


	19. A New Recruit

"All righty. Cats of Pranksters United, we must go to RichClan and find a recruit. Now that they are living by the lake, we must find them a representative." Chucklezpaw mewed.

Donutpaw nodded.

Crazypaw also nodded.

Wildpaw looked thoughtful. "Are we all going?" he asked.

"No. This has to be a stealth mission. I'll go." Chucklezpaw mewed. "I will do some research and report back to HQ. We will make the decision for the recruit then."

"Okee-dokee." Wildpaw mewed.

"It has to be a kit, of course. Not an apprentice or warrior. They have to be raised so pranking is all they know. Apprentices and warriors are already trained to not prank." Crazypaw added.

Chucklezpaw nodded. "Right. I'll be back before sunrise, after I complete part one of the mission." he slipped out of the clubhouse.

He screeched in surprise when a black, white, and gray calico tom jumped out of the bushes and faced him, nose-to-nose. "Who are you?" he hissed.

The tom blinked at him. "ABCkit."

"Great. What Clan are you from? RichClan?" Chucklezpaw mewed hopefully.

"No. I'm a KittypetClan cat, just like you."

"How do you know? I've never met you before."

"Yeah, I just got accepted into KittypetClan."

"Oh."

"So, Pranksters United, eh?" ABCkit wound past Chucklezpaw. "Can I join?"

"Oh my..." Chucklezpaw gasped. "You-you know what it is?"

"Yeah. I've done my research." ABCkit shrugged. "So, can I join?"

"I-I-I need to speak to the other members about that." Chucklezpaw sighed. _He can't join! There's only supposed to be one representative for each Clan! _

"Oh. Okay." ABCkit waited.

Chucklezpaw groaned. "Can you, like, go away?" he asked.

ABCkit shook his head. "No."

_He's trying to steal the password! Well, good thing there's also a paw-scan_. Chucklezpaw said nothing else, but used the paw-scan and slipped back into the clubhouse before ABCkit could follow. "Guys!" he breathed. "We've been discovered! There's this new tom in my Clan, ABCkit, and he knows about Pranksters United. And he wants to join!"

"He can't!" wailed Crazypaw.

Chucklezpaw glared at all of them. "Who broke the Code of Secrecy?" he growled. "ABCkit couldn't have figured out anything without somebody telling him."

Donutpaw looked sheepish. "He may have bribed me..." he muttered.

Wildpaw screeched in fury and launched himself at Donutpaw. "HOW COULD YOU?! WE MAY HAVE TO GIVE UP ON PRANKSTERS UNITED! IT IS A SECRET CLUB. AND NOW THAT SOMEONE WHO IS NOT A PRANKSTER KNOWS, WE ARE IN DANGER OF BEING DISCOVERED!"

"We could bribe him to be quiet." Donutpaw whispered.

Chucklezpaw hissed. "ABCkit seems to sharp to ever agree to a bribe, unless it's to accepted into the club!"

"So why don't we let him in?" Donutpaw asked.

"Because then others will find out, and they'll want to join, and we'd have to accept them. And that would go on and on until every single cat in the world was in Pranksters United!" Chucklezpaw snapped.

Donutpaw frowned. "Oh. Right."

"I'll just tell him that we're undecided right now." Chucklezpaw groaned. He padded back out, winding up, yet again, nose-to-nose with ABCkit.

"Well?" ABCkit mewed.

"We're undecided." Chucklezpaw mewed simply.

"Make up your mind soon!" ABCkit mewed. "Or else I will tell the Clans about the club!"

_Gee, thanks so much, Donutpaw._ Chucklezpaw sighed, gave ABCkit a curt nod, and walked off towards RichClan.

"Recruits, recruits, recruits..." he muttered, slipping into RichClan's camp. The guard, named Spongebobfur, was sleeping on the job. So he got past safely. "All right, nursery..." he sniffed the air and detected the nursery-scent. He padded to the den and stuck his head in. All of the kits looked strong, but untrained, which was good, because they couldn't be warrior-trained before they were prank-trained.

_All worthy of being taken a closer look at. I shall visit them in the morning, and see which one stands out as a pranker._

* * *

"All right, kits. I'm Chucklezpaw, from a top-secret club called Pranksters United, where one cat from each Clan comes to prank their Clanmates."

"Oh! Chucklezpaw, may I please join?" asked one of the kits.

"Whinykit, you have to prove yourself first."

"But I don't right?"

"Spoiledkit, the same rules apply to everyone. Including you."

Spoiledkit pouted.

"Why should we do pranks when you can do them?" asked Orphankit, whose parents are unknown.

"Because you get more satisfaction." Chucklezpaw mewed.

"Well, can you show us? Perhaps, do a prank?" Orphankit purred.

Chucklezpaw shrugged. "I don't know why not." he pulled out an atomic Whoopee Cushion.

Mayorstar sat on it and blew up RichClan.

Then Hermione Granger ran in, said _Reparo_, and ran out.

RichClan was un-blown up.

The RichClan kits rolled around laughing.

"That's hilare-lare!" laughed Spoiledkit.

Chucklezpaw nodded. "Thank you. Now, anybody want to prove that they can join Pranksters United?"

"We do!" chanted the kits.

Chucklezpaw put them through pranking tests.

In the end, Orphankit won.

Spoiledkit and Whinykit began throwing tantrums. "NO FAIR!"

Chucklezpaw pulled out a Men In Black Neuralyzer and made all of the other kits forget everything. Then he grabbed Orphankit and ran back to HQ.

"Here's our new recruit!" Chucklezpaw mewed cheerfully. "This is Orphankit!"

"Welcome, Orphankit." Donutpaw nodded.

"Yes. Welcome. May the power of pranking be with you." Crazypaw nodded.

Chucklezpaw was relieved to have found a worthy recruit. "Well, if that's all, I'm gonna go back to ThunderClan. They'll notice I'm gone if I don't go back soon."

"Yeah." Wildpaw nodded.

Donutpaw dipped his head. "I shall escort her back to RichClan."

"Kay, thanks." Chucklezpaw mewed. He padded out, was yet again nose-to-nose with ABCkit.

"Well?" the tom demanded. "Am I allowed in?"

Chucklezpaw gulped. He had forgotten to discuss it! It was all up to him. "Well..."

* * *

**HAHA! A cliffie!**

**Anyways, I'm still taking suggestions for cats. And names for kits! I've already got names, but I'm going to need a lot more! XD**


	20. Grr

"Hello! I am Summerbreeze! FEAR ME!" she screamed, walking in to ThunderClan camp.

Jayfeather ran out of his den. "FINE! I FEAR YOU! NOW GET OUT OF MY LIFE!"

"OMG YOU'RE JAYFEATHER!" Summberbreeze screamed. She ran over to him and bowed down to him.

"NO... I'M CHANNING TATUM (BTW, in case you didn't know, he was recently voted the sexiest man alive)!"

"Oh. That makes sense!" Summerbreeeze mewed, her eyes in hearts.

Jayfeather rolled his eyes.

Then Firestar ran into camp screaming, "I'M DEAD!" then he ran out.

Then Heartshadow ran in. "TACOS! BANANAS! PIKACHU! I CHOOSE YOU!" she ran out, and back to ShadowClan.

Then Channing Tatum walked in with his shirt off. "I'm the sexiest man alive!"

The she-cats drooled.

Their mates slapped them.

The "sexiest man alive" walked out.

"WAIT!" screamed Cloudtail. "ALL OF THE HOTNESS IS GONE!"

Fernlight slapped him.

Gorgeousleaf shoved him down.

Swiftstorm growled.

"HOT CATS, ATTACK!" Fernlight screamed, leading her comrades/ enemies into "battle".

Cloudtail was seriously injured.

* * *

"WE ARE NEVER, EVER EVER GETTING BACK TOGETHER!" screamed Ravenpaw mockingly.

"YOU DO NOT MOCK TAY-TAY!" screamed Barleypaw. He attacked Ravenpaw.

...

"Hello, my friends, we have gathered here today to have a One Direction Intervention!" Moleohimustbecomingdownwitha cold mewed.

Cherrypie screamed. "HOW DARE YOU! YOU SAID THIS WAS A PANCAKE FIESTA!"

The she-cats wailed as Moleohimustbecomingdownwitha cold plugged in his iPod and recordings of him mockingly singing One Direction songs blared from the speakers.

Moleohimustbecomingdownwitha cold pulled out life-sized cardboard cutouts of the One Direction gang and threw them into the lake.

The she-cats sobbed.

Berrynose flung himself into the lake. "NO! NOT HARRY!" he wailed.

Then, One Direction walked into ThunderClan camp.

"EEE!" the she-cats squealed. "ALL HAIL THE MIGHTY ONE DIRECTION!"

Then, the Clans magically poofed to a auditorium. One Direction was on the stage. They started to sing.

The she-cats and Berrynose screamed and cheered.

The toms booed and covered their ears.

Chucklezpaw kicked One Direction off the stage.

The toms cheered.

The she-cats and Berrynose booed.

They poofed back to camp.

Then Hollyleaf came down from the sky.

"OMG this is like the Ferncloud thingy, isn't it?" Bramblestar mewed.

"Yeah!" Hollyleaf mewed.

"AWESOME!" Bramblestar began to dance.

Nachos began to fall from the sky.

"NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM!" screamed the Clan, diving into a mountain of nachos.

"Snowpaw," Bramblestar mumbled behind a mouthful of nachos. "Go to the other Clans and tell them about this. We must share this nochoey goodness!"

Snowpaw stuffed one more chip into his mouth, and then ran out of camp.

* * *

**WindClan...**

"NACHO MOUNTAIN?!" gasped Onestar. "MY DREAM HAS COME TRUE! WINDMONKEYS, TO KITTYPETCLAN!" WindClan used their superspeed and ran to KittypetClan.

They dived into the mountain of nachos.

* * *

**RiverClan...**

"BUT I WANT CANDY MOUNTAIN!" whined Mistystar.

"Well, this is the second best thing." Snowpaw said.

"CHARLIE, TAKE US TO CANDY MOUNTAIN!" screamed RiverClan.

"IT'S NACHO MOUNTAIN!" screamed Snowpaw. "And I'm Snowpaw! Not Charlie the Unicorn!"

"SNOWPAW, TAKE US TO NACHO MOUNTAIN!" screamed RiverClan.

Snowpaw shrugged. "Better." he ushered them to KittypetClan.

* * *

**ShadowClan...**

"Hm..." Blackstar mewed. "Nacho Mountain..."

"Oh, c'mon, you old geezer, you can't pass an opportunity like this! You're so old you'll die soon! There won't be many more days you can do awesome things!" Rowanclaw mewed.

Blackstar chased his former deputy all the way to Nacho Mountain.

"YEAH!" yelled ShadowClan. "NACHO MOUNTAIN!" they followed their leader to Nacho Mountain.

* * *

**RichClan...**

Mayorstar shrugged at Snowpaw. "I don't see why not."

RichClan ran to KittypetClan.

* * *

As the cats began to have the "Nacho Wars", Taco Mountain fell down next to Nacho Mountain.

"MEXICAN FIESTA!" screamed Bramblestar.

Then a tom and a fox ran into the camp "Hi! I'm Bob!" the cat mewed.

The fox attacked Bob.

Bob ate the fox, then exploded into sweets.

"CANDY MOUNTAIN! YESH!" Mistystar screamed.

* * *

**Still taking names for kits. I hope to have the kits come next chapter... SO HELP ME!**


	21. So many kits, so random-ness! LOL

In the nursery, the queens had their phones and laptops out and they were all texting, talking, and using Facepaw (Facebook for cats!).

**PRESENTING... the exciting text-conversation between Squirrelflight and Sandstorm!**

_Heyyyyy Mom _

_'Sup, sweetie? _

_I'm bored. _

_That's a reason I'm glad Firestar's dead. I don't have to sit in the nursery, feeling useless. I GET TO PATROL! Actually, there's Thornclaw screaming at me to stop texting and hunt. _

_MOM! That's mean! _

_Just sayin'. I miss Firestar tho. _

_Ya. _

_I really miss that ginger fluffball of awesomeness. _

_Please don't do it mom. _

_What? _

_Yell up to the sky, "FIRESTAR?! CAN YOU HEAR ME?! I LOVE YOU, POOKIE BEAR!" _

_...You heard that? _

_Yes. THE WHOLE CLAN DID. _

_O. _

_Ya. _

_Uh-oh. What's that kicking I feel in my stomach? _

_The kits? _

_Rite... I thot it could be the nachos having a battle with the five-pound bag of sugar I swallowed. _

_YOU WAT?! _

_This convo is over. Bi mom, luv ya. _

_Sure... but I think we need to discuss your sugar intake. _

_NO! NO! PLEASE NO! NOT THE SUGAR TALK! _

_Leafpool had the talk when she was two moons old. There are reasons she is saner than you! _

_Really?_ Squirrelflight pulled out her laptop and went on Facepaw. She went to Leafpool's account.

_Leafpool is currently having a booty-shaking contest with WindClan!_

Squirrelflight sighed and texted Sandstorm. _Look at her Facepaw status._

Sandstorm doesn't text back for a few minutes. Then, she finally does. _Whoa. Forget it. You're the sane one. _

_YA MOM. _

_Srry, sweetie. _

_I am now going on Facepaw to find somebody else to chat with. _

_You know what, so will I._

_STALKER _

_It's a "Mommy Job". When your kits get Facepaws, you'll want to find out what they're up to, too. _

_No, I won't. _

_Yes, you will _

_No _

_Yes _

_No _

_Yes _

_No. _

_YES! _

_NO! _

_I GIVE UP!_

_Ok, bi! _

_BI!_

Squirrelflight groaned. "That was a pointless chat."

"You're telling me." Sorreltail growled. "Brackenfur is texting me the numbers of PI!"

"Why?"

"I don't know."

"That makes sense."

"Sure..."

"There are so many numbers in Pi!"

"This is boring."

"Yeah. You wanna go run around the lake with me?"

"No. Going near the lake does nothing good for me."

"Huh?"

"Remember... I had my kits and I nearly died?"

"What?"

"I went to the lake to get a drink, then I began to kit and I was in so much pain!"

"Oh, right, that."

"Yeah."

"Oh, geez! My stomach hurts!" Poppyfrost screamed.

"Nacho and sugar battle?" Squirrelflight asked.

"No. I only had nachos and tacos. The apprentices and you had already eaten the candy."

"Nacho and taco battle?"

"No. Nachos and tacos go together like ketchup and mustard." Poppyfrost groaned. "I'm kitting, you dumbhead!"

"Oh boy." Brightheart hissed. "So am I!"

"And me." Ferncloud gritted her teeth.

"SOMEBODY GET JAYFEATHER!" roared Cinderheart.

"You've got medicine cat skills, don't you?" grunted Rosepetal.

"I'M NOT GONNA USE 'EM NOW!" growled Cinderheart.

Soon enough, all the she-cats had begun to kit.

Jayfeather ran into the den. "WHO DARES DISTURB MY SLUMBER!?" he growled.

"WE DO!" screamed the she-cats. "WE'RE KITTING!"

"All of you?" Jayfeather whimpered.

"All of us." the she-cats hissed.

"Oh boy. BRIARLIGHT, GET LEAFPOOL, HERBS USED FOR KITTING, AND GET YOUR BUTT OVER HERE!"

Those three cats had a lot of work to do.

* * *

"PRESENTING..." Bramblestar yowled. "FIFTY MILLION KITS!"

Brightheart walked up with two kits, Partykit and Kittypetkit.

Sorreltail walked up with Pussinbootskit, Foxkit, Normalkit, Eggnogkit, and Shoekit.

Millie walked up with Fartkit, Treekit, and Kitkatkit.

Poppyfrost came up with Gangnamstylekit and PSYkit.

Cinderheart presented StrawberryChapstickkit, Cherrykit, Picklekit, Jinglekit, and Sol-is-so-annoyingkit.

Dovewing walked up with Eaglekit, Hawkkit, and Hollykit.

Rosepetal pranced up with her kits, Skittlekit and Teddyboobearkit.

Squirrelflight walked up with Shrewkit, Mousekit, and Bunnykit.

Ferncloud came up with OMGkit, Shinykit, Sparklekit, Browniekit, Insanekit, Toomanykitskit, Cinderxlion00kit, Trollkit, and Forever-Alonekit. And then Ferncloud had more kits. They were named HarryPotterkit, HermioneGrangerkit, and RonWeasleykit.

"HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO REMEMBER ALL THESE NAMES?!" roared Thornclaw.

"By a list!" Ferncloud mewed cheerily.

She began passing out a list.

**1. Partykit**

**2. Kittypetkit**

**3. Pussinbootskit**

**4. Foxkit**

**5. Normalkit**

**6. Eggnogkit**

**7. Shoekit**

**8. Fartkit**

**9. Treekit**

**10. Kitkatkit**

**11. GangnamStylekit**

**12. PSYkit**

**13. StrawberryChapstickkit**

**14. Cherrykit**

**15. Picklekit**

**16. Jinglekit**

**17. Sol-Is-So-Annoyingkit**

**18. Eaglekit**

**19. Hawkkit**

**20. Hollykit**

**21. Skittlekit**

**22. Teddyboobearkit**

**23. Shrewkit**

**24. Mousekit**

**25. Bunnykit**

**26. OMGkit**

**27. Shinykit**

**28. Sparklekit**

**29. Browniekit**

**30. Insanekit**

**31. Toomanykitskit**

**32. Cinderxlion00kit**

**33. Trollkit**

**34. Forever-Alonekit**

**35. HarryPotterkit**

**36. HermioneGrangerkit**

**37. RonWeasleykit**

"I'M EVEN MORE CONFUSED!" wailed Thornclaw.

"GOOD FOR YOU, NOBODY CARES." Jayfeather yelled, being the mean grump that he is.


	22. More Dramatic Flashbacks and Lists Oo

**The real reason Tawnypelt went to ShadowClan...**

"Tawnypaw, I shall give you a cookie if you come to ShadowClan." Tigerstar mewed.

"I will give you two!" Goldenflower growled.

"Three cookies."

"Four!"

"Five!"

"Six!"

"Seven!"

"Eight!"

"Nine!"

"Tawnypaw," Tigerstar mewed. "I shall give you 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 cookies if you come to ShadowClan."

"All right!" Tawnypaw mewed.

"Bramblepaw, I now ask you to join me." Tigerstar mewed. "And Tawnypaw, of course."

Bramblepaw looked suspiciously at Tigerstar. "Do you have any more cookies?"

Tigerstar checked his pockets, his cookie jar, and then scavenged ShadowClan's bakery. "No..." he mewed. "But I have spinach!"

"Ew..." Bramblepaw shrunk away.

"Bramblepaw, I will give you 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 cookies if you stay." Goldenflower mewed.

"I was already going to stay, but okay!" Bramblepaw mewed cheerily.

Tigerstar growled. "I should've tried to bribe Bramblepaw first."

Tawnypaw growled at Tigerstar. "Well, you didn't. And why did Bramblepaw get more cookies than me?"

"Because the ThunderClan bakery is bigger than ShadowClan's!" Tigerstar began to sob. Then, he perked up. "Wait... I'm leader, so I can order that there be an expansion on the bakery!" he ran back to ShadowClan.

"Hey, wait up!" Tawnypaw cried, running after him.

* * *

**The Battle With BloodClan...**

"Come on, Firestar. Join TigerClan already!" whined Tigerstar.

Firestar stared at him. "I would, but there are voices telling me not to do it."

"Don't do it!" Tallstar, Sandstorm, Graystripe, and the rest of ThunderClan and WindClan whispered.

"Fine. We fight now. BloodClan, attack!"

"No. You are a loser." Scourge growled. "And I do not take orders from losers." he killed Tigerstar.

"LionClan, attack!" screamed Firestar.

They fought.

Whitestorm died because Bone was singing "Baby" Justin Bieber.

Bone died because the apprentices sang "What Makes You Beautiful", by One Direction.

Firestar died because Scourge stole his pineapple.

Firestar joined in with the apprentices, singing One Direction. He sung so awfully that Scourge died.

"We won! YEAH!" yelled Firestar.

* * *

"Those were EPIC!" screamed Mosskit, applauding.

* * *

**Back on land...**

"ABCkit, you cannot join Pranksters United." Chucklezpaw mewed.

"Then I'm gonna go tell the whole Clan-"

"I'll give you a chocolate bar if you keep quiet."

"Ten. And make 'em Hershey's Cookies and Cream." ABCkit mewed.

"Deal."

They walked back to camp.

* * *

Bramblestar jumped up onto Highledge. "All cats old enough to know better than to go to the bathroom in their nests, join me under EpicLedge because the apprentices deserve to become warriors!"

"But we've been apprentices for about a WEEK!" yelled Spoilerpaw.

"Shush! This our big chance!" growled Ravenpaw.

"I name you apprentices Seedsilly, Lilyflower Snowshizzle, Amberawesomeness, Dewdrop, Rainbowpeacesign, Candystore, Sugarhyper, Sandypoopookins, HurricaneSandy, SnapCracklePop, CracklePopSnap, PopCrackleSnap, Dustpelt-is-amazingNOT!, CocoaPuffsareyummy, Hungryforeverything, Tacoawesome, Fluffyisascarydog, Chucklez-Lives-On, Peetahotness, Katnissprettypaws, Hawkfire, Stripefoot, AwesomeisBramblestar, Ravenpaw, Barley, Kittycat, SexyandIknowit, Moonhomie, Sunshizzle, StarClan, Randomnessisawesome, Herbpatch, Crazytrain, Amazingness, Epicness, Happysad, Superman, Ferncloud-the-kit-machine's-millionth-kit, Spoilersarenotgoodthings, and Bluestardoesdadisco!"

"WE NEED ANOTHER LIST!" yelled Thornclaw.

"Gladly!" mewed Bramblestar, and passed out a list.

**1. Seedsilly **

**2. Lilyflower **

**3. Snowshizzle **

**4. Amberawesomeness **

**5. Dewdrop **

**6. Rainbowpeacesign **

**7. Candystore **

**8. Sugarhyper **

**9. Sandypoopookins **

**10. HurricaneSandy **

**11. SnapCracklePop **

**12. CracklePopSnap **

**13. PopCrackleSnap **

**14. Dustpelt-is-amazingNOT! **

**15. CocoaPuffsareyummy **

**16. Hungryforeverything **

**17. Tacoawesome **

**18. Fluffyisascarydog**

** 19. Chucklez-Lives-On **

**20. Peetahotness **

**21. Katnissprettypaws **

**22. Hawkfire **

**23. Stripefoot **

**24. AwesomenessisBramblestar **

**25. Ravenpaw **

**26. Barley **

**27. Kittycat **

**28. SexyandIknowit **

**29. Amazingness **

**30. Epicness **

**31. Happysad **

**32. Randomnessisawesome **

**33. Herbpatch **

**34. Crazytrain **

**35. Superman **

**36. Ferncloud-the-kit-machine's-millionth-kit **

**37. Spoilersarenotgoodthings **

**38. Bluestardoesdadisco**

"ALL HAIL THE NEW WARRIORS!" yelled the Clan.

"THUNDERCLAN, TO THE LIMO!" yelled Bramblestar. "WE SHALL GO TO THE MOVIES!"

They ran to the limo.

WindClan, RiverClan, ShadowClan, RichClan, StarClan, The Dark Forest, and The Tribe Of Rushing Water were already in the limo.

"Whoa..." Herbpatch whispered.

"It's a miracle we'll all be able to fit in!" Epicness mewed.

"Yeah." Chucklez-Lives-On mewed.

"Whatever. GET IN!" yelled Bramblestar. He shoved the Clan in.

"OUCH! MY TACO!"

"FIRESTAR!" screamed Sandstorm.

"SANDSTORM!" yelled Firestar.

They began to lick each other.

"TO THE MOVIES, JAMES!" yelled Blackstar.

Rowanclaw groaned. "I hate it when he makes me play servant." he started the engine when Hawkfrost tried to kill Bramblestar again.

"All right, we're at the movies. Come on, go into the theater!" Bramblestar yelled, after they had raided the snack stands.

The toms went to "The Avengers".

The she-cats and queens went to "Twilight, Breaking Dawn Part 2".

The medicine cats went to "Ted".

The apprentices went to "Rise of the Guardians".

The kits went to "Wreck It Ralph".

The elders went to some movie that old people like.

Peetahotness and Katnissprettypaws went to "The Hunger Games".

And that was all.

...

"That was EPIC!" roared the tom.

"That was wonderful!" sniffed the she-cats.

"AWESOME!" yelled the medicine cats.

"Cool!" the apprentices cried.

"That was so fun!" the kits squealed.

"Lovely!" the elders mewed.

"THERE'S A MOVIE ABOUT US!" whooped Peetahotness and Katnissprettypaws.

"..."

* * *

**Wow, 102 reviews! I feel so special... THANK YOU ALL! I will now throw cake at all who have reviewed! *Throws cake into crowd of screaming fans***

**All right, I shall now give you cupcakes and a plushie of a character of your choice if you review! XD**

**...If you don't review, Hungryforeverything will eat every scrap of food in your possession! Mwa ha ha ha...**


	23. Hawkfire Da Awesome Kitteh

"I have one announcement for this Gathering and one announcement only," Bramblestar mewed. "ThunderClan is sexy and we know it. Thank you for your cooperation."

And then SexyandIknowit walked in, LMFAO behind him. They began to sing 'I'm Sexy and I Know it'.

The Clans began rocking out.

And then Hawkfrost walked in. "EEP!" screamed the Clans. "AN EVIL CAT!" they whimpered.

And then President Snow walked in. "EEK!" screamed the Clans. "PRESIDENT SNOW!" their eyes widened.

Mousefur walked in. "OH NO!" screamed the Clans. "A CRANKY ELDER!" they backed away slowly.

Tigerstar walked in. "IT'S VOLDEMORT!" screamed the Clans, backing up even farther.

SexyandIknowit, who had gone to get a drink, walked back onto the island. "AHHHHHHHH!" screamed the Clans. "A SEXY CAT!" they whimpered. They ran away.

SexyandIknowit did not realize that they were running away from him. "Hm, the Gathering's broken up already?" he asked aloud. "Well, then..." he ran after the Clans.

The Clans, thinking they were being chased, screamed loudly. They ran around the lake 1,234,567,8910 times before calming down.

* * *

"OMG OMG OMG!" screamed Cinderxlion00kit, running into Bramblestar's den. "Bramblestar, you gotta help us!" Bramblestar stared at her.

"What's wrong?"

"THEY CANCELLED SPONGEBOB!" she wailed.

"OH NO!" Bramblestar yelled. "LIFE IS OVER! WE MUST GO WARN THE OTHER CLANS!"

"Too late." PSYkit mewed.

The other Clans, StarClan, the Dark Forest, and the Tribe of Rushing Water are already here, crying.

"Dude, they cancelled Spongebob!" Onestar whispered.

Mistystar and Blackstar were hugging each other, sobbing.

"HEY, YOU, BLACKSTAR!" growled Onestar. "How dare you hug my woman?"

"Um, Mistystar is kinda cheating on you, dude." Blackstar mewed.

"And since how long has this been?" Onestar growled.

"Since the second day we dated." Mistystar moved over

"Oh." Onestar shrugged. "Well, Blackstar, I suppose we can share her. You can have her on Mondays, and I can have her on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday!"

"NO!" Blackstar mewed. "I may not know how to count, or the days of the week but I know that's not fair!"

"Fine." Onestar grumped. "Mistystar, I am no longer mates with you."

"Yeah, neither am I." Blackstar mewed. "I just remembered, I'm kinda cheating on DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR..." he backed away slowly.

Mistystar grumped. "But I want a mate!" she stared at Bramblestar. "Hey you! Are you single?"

"NO." yelled Bramblestar.

"Poop."

"Hey!" somebody cried.

"What?" yelled Blackstar.

"I'm Hawkfire!" mewed a cat. She stepped down from the clouds.

"OMG... you live in the clouds!" gasped Bunnykit.

"Yeah!" Hawkfire mewed. "I'm gonna be the queen of the Clans, the Tribe, and the Dark Forest, and StarClan! I'm MAGICAL."

"EPIC!" Epicness mewed.

"If you're so magical, then make me a new mate!" Daisy mewed. "I want to have more kits!"

"Kay!" mewed Hawkfire. She clapped her paws. A handsome golden-and-ginger tom appeared. "This is Solar. He's destined to be a loner, but he can be your mate when the time comes around."

"LUCK-EE!" yelled the she-cats.

Their mates slapped them.

Fernlight, Gorgeousleaf, Swiftstorm, Sweetcat, and Cloudfeather walked up.

"OOOOOOOOOH!" yelled the toms. "IT'S DA HOTTIES!"

The she-cats turned their attention away from Solar for enough time to see what the toms were doing. They slapped them, then returned to mooning over Solar.

The toms slapped them and returned to mooning over the pretty she-cats.

"PARTY IN CELEBRATION OF HAWKFIRE'S ARRIVAL!" yelled Onestar.

The Clans began to boogie.

"I definitely chose a good group of cats to rule," mewed Hawkfire. "She began to dance.

"GANGNAM STYLE!" yelled Goldenwing.

Then One Direction walked in.

"NO!" screamed Hawkfire. "I DESPISE YOU!" she attacked One Direction and drove them away from the lake.

"NOOO!" all the she-cats and Berrynose wailed.

"YEAH!" yelled the toms. "I love our new ruler!"

The she-cats and Berrynose began to sob.

"They'll get over it." Hawkfire mewed.

"Yeah." Bramblestar mewed. "You are the only she-cat who's sane here."

"Thank you." Hawkfire bowed.

The toms cheered.

The she-cats and Berrynose continued to cry.

"MAN UP!" yelled the toms.

"But we are't men!" yelled the she-cats. "We're she-cats!"

"Berrynose isn't!" yelled Hawkfire. "MAN UP, HALFTAIL!"

The real Halftail sighed. "Ain't that insulting."

"DON'T SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT!" Hawkfire screamed, turning into flames.

"Sorry." Halftail squeaked.

"Okay, apology accepted." Hawkfire mewed, and returned to normal.

"Whoa..." Bramblestar mewed. "I like our new queen!"

* * *

**A/N: ****Yes, I had to add myself in as "supreme overlord" of the warriors. I guess I'll just put myself in this story from time to time, as I mainly want to focus on the real cats and your cats.**

**Anyhoo... I want a partner and a group for Hawkfire (me)! The partner will have nearly as much power as me, but I still have more... and the "group" will have power, but not as much.**

**So, I will ask you a question. And the first person to review and answer the question right will get their cat in as my partner (if you have a cat already in this story, I will just have them join me, but if you don't, with your answer, tell me your cat, using the guide I wrote up in one of the other chapters, and please tell me if you will only have this character used if they can be my partner, or if you don't get it right, then just as a cat...). Other people who answer it correctly can be part of my gang, the group of all-powerful cats, but not as powerful as me or my partner. Join if you want! :)**

**Anyways, here is the question!**

**What is the name of Raggedstar's father? (This is stated in Yellowfang's Secret, just sayin') **

**The first person to answer this question will get to have their cat be my partner! Join in if you want... but, if you're not interested in having a cat in my story, please don't answer the question.**

**Oh yeah! And if you guess, please add in what powers you would mainly want (like flying or lightning powers of something like that... :))**

**Thanks!**

**-Chucklez**


	24. SHE HAS BROKEN THE WARRIOR CODE!

**Reply to reviews:**

**Okay, so... remember, if you answer the question and you haven't got a cat in this story yet, you need to give me one! And you need to answer the question "Who is Raggedstar's father?" to become part of the "group" of all-powerful cats.**

**I joined this website to become a better writer. Sure, I'll take SPECIFIC constructive critiscm, but random derogatory remarks aren't helpful. **

**Now, ON WITH THE CHAPTER!**

* * *

The Clans were partying, and not getting any work done, as usual, when Hawkfire appeared.

"Hey!" she mewed cheerily.

"Hi, Hawkfire!" chorused the Clans.

"I wanna introduce you to somebody."

"Who?"

"Whitestreak! He's mah partner and my friend! Or, technically, your king." she added as an afterthought.

A handsome white tom with blue eyes appeared beside Hawkfire. "Hi." he said boredly.

"HE'S THE CAT VERSION OF CHANNING TATUM!" screamed the she-cats.. "HE'S HAWT!"

Whitestreak rolled his eyes, and whispered to Hawkfire, "This is getting rather boring. Wherever I go, there's mooning she-cats surrounding me."

"You should be lucky that you're being mooned over everywhere you go," Hawkfire mewed. "You're so hot, you get free stuff!"

Half the she-cats were flinging prey at Whitestreak's paws. The other half was bowing, screaming "We are not worthy!"

"No, you really aren't." Whitestreak mewed. Then his eyes widened. "Fernlight? What are you doing here?"

"Oh, hi, bro." Fernlight mewed boredly.

"You two are related?" Bramblestar gasped.

"That would explain a bit." Whitestreak snapped.

"Yeah." Squirrelflight mewed dreamily. "Like, why you two are basically the hottest cats from each gender!"

The Clans stared at her. Whitestreak's and Fernlight's jaws were down and their eyes were popping.

"What?" Squirrelflight mewed mildly. "Just pointin' it out!"

"Aye aye aye..." Hawkfire groaned, face-pawing.

"HEY... MACARENA!" Bluestar screamed.

"SHIP HER TO THE MENTAL ASYLUM!" wailed Tigerstar.

"HEY! TIGGER!" screamed Hollyleaf. "IT'S STATED IN THE WARRIOR CODE RULE BOOK, PAGE 9,876,543,210, LINE THREE, THAT NO CAT BY THE NAME OF TIGERSTAR MAY SAY "SHIP HER TO THE MENTAL ASYLUM"! YOU HAVE BROKEN THE WARRIOR CODE!"

And then Bluestar shot back "Guess what? It is also stated on page 11 that no cat named Hollyleaf may say, "It's stated in the Warrior Code Rule Book, page 9,876,543,210, line three, that no cat by the name of Tigerstar may say "ship her to the mental asylum"! You have broken the Warrior Code!" And, ooooh!" she looked down at her copy of the "Warrior Code Rule Book" it says that it is punishable by sentencing the guilty cat to life in prison!"

"GASP!" everyone gasped.

"Thanks, Bluestar!" Tigerstar mewed.

"WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!" Hawkfire gasped.

"Um, I dunno..." Bluestar mewed. "Tigerstar might've once been my mate..."

"GASP!" everyone gasped.

"Bluestar? What's your problem?" Firestar growled.

"I DON'T GOT NO PROBLEM." Bluestar muttered.

Thrushpelt patted Bluestar's back. "It's all right, sweetie. You're still pretty."

Bluestar smacked Thrushpelt.

"Well, we still have Bluestar's accusation to deal with." Sunstar mewed. "And this can only mean one thing. WE MUST GO TO COURT."

"OMG." OMGkit mewed.

They were poofed to court.

"Okay, so... who are da lawyers?" Thunderstar, the judge asked.

Goldenwing and Lionblaze stepped up.

"Goldenwing? You're a lawyer?" Bluestar mewed.

"Yeah. Not only do I play the viola, but I am also a skilled lawyer!"

"Whoa." the cats applauded.

Goldenwing bowed.

"Okay, now, do you all swear to tell the truth, and nothing but the truth?" Thunderstar asked.

"Yes." the jury mewed.

"Yes." Hollyleaf mewed.

"Yes." Bluestar mewed.

"Yes." Goldenwing mewed.

"No." Lionblaze yawned.

"Lionblaze! You're supposed to say "Yes"!" hissed Hollyleaf.

He blinked. "But that would be lying."

Hollyleaf face-pawed. "Can I have another lawyer?"

"No." Thunderstar mewed.

"Blah."

"So... Hollyleaf, Bluestar wants to throw you in prison for whatever reason, what do you have to say for yourself?"

"I didn't do anything." Hollyleaf mewed.

Lionblaze growled. "YOU LIE!"

"She's lied!" wailed the jury.

"You go to prison." Thunderstar mewed.

"No!" yelled Hawkfire.

"Yes!" cackled Thunderstar.

"DIE!" Hawkfire screamed, throwing a ball of fire at him. "I AM A FIRE BENDER!"

"Is that a real thing?" Fartkit asked.

"Oh, wait, you're already dead." grumped Hawkfire to Thunderstar. "Well, I'm sending you to prison instead of Hollyleaf."

"But I didn't do anything wrong!" protested Thunderstar.

Hawkfire got this menacing look in her eyes. "YOU WERE BORN."

"Oh." Thunderstar mewed.

"SECURITY, TAKE HIM AWAY!" ordered Hawkfire.

"YAY!" Hollyleaf did a victory dance as Thunderstar was taken away. "I'm free!"

"Not so fast..." Hawkfire growled. "I only said that because I like you more than the old geezer who was just taken away. You get a spanking."

Shadowheart jumped in front of Hawkfire, nunchucks in paw. "Oh! Hawkfire! May I please spank her?"

"Sure." Hawkfire mewed boredly.

"AHHH!" Hollyleaf ran around the courtroom, Shadowheart chasing her and flinging out the nunchucks like a whip, and hitting her every time.

Hawkfire grinned at Whitestreak. "This is pleasant, isn't it?"

"Sure..." Whitestreak shrugged.


	25. Let them eat cake!

**Okay, so several "Guests", or people who don't have accounts on Fanfiction have asked me questions referring to joining Fanfiction. So I'll answer them**:

**Is Fanfiction free? Yes!**

**Would Fanfiction send emails to you? Not exactly. You just need to put in your email because you need that for Private Messaging to work, and it's also used for  
people to answer other questions on Fanfiction, with the "Help" button. And even if you don't want Private Messaging, you still need it for other reasons.**

**Hope this helped!**

**Now, to the chapter!**

* * *

"OMG!" screamed Bramblestar. "There's a sleepover at the Tribe of Rushing Water! WE MUST GO! Get your sleeping bags, everyone!"

"Wait, don't leave without me!" a cat, who looked half like Cinderheart, and half like Lionblaze, burst into camp. She literally looked half like Cinderheart and half like Lionblaze. She was gray on one side and gold on the other.

"Who are you?" Bramblestar mewed.

"Cinderblaze!" the she-cat mewed. "The kit of Cinderheart and Lionblaze!"

"Oh." Bramblestar mewed.

"You didn't tell me we had another kit!" Lionblaze mewed at Cinderheart.

"I didn't know we had another kit!" Cinderheart mewed.

"Oh well." Bramblestar mewed. "Let's go!"

"But it'll take us forever to get there!" Squirrelflight whined. "Isn't there an easier way?"

"NO." Bramblestar mewed.

"Yes!" Hawkfire and Whitestreak appeared.

"Ooh. What?" asked Squirrelflight.

"Teleporting!" Hawkfire clapped her paws.

They poofed to the Tribe of Rushing Water.

"Ooh!" Brook mewed. "They're here!"

The Clans (SkyClan included), StarClan, the Dark Forest, and kittypets, loners, and rogues appeared at the Tribe.

"Hey!" mewed Squirrelflight, high-pawing Brook.

"Hi!" Brook mewed.

"Okay, so-" Stoneteller began, when the doorbell rang. "Ooh! Pizza's here!" he walked through the waterfall, snatched the pizza boxes from the pizza guy, not bothering to pay, and walked back in. "Now, before we were interrupted-" he was interrupted again.

"Ooh! All the food I ordered is here!" Hungryforeverything mewed. He walked out, took the food from the delivery guy, didn't pay, and walked back in.

"YAY!" yelled Bramblestar. "We can make a buffet!"

Hawkfire clapped her paws, and all of the food was made into a buffet. There was a drink section, an appetizer section, a main course section, a side section, and a dessert section.

"Let's eat!" yelled Whitestorm.

The Clans dove in.

When the eating had slowed, they began to play Truth, Dare, Kiss, Promise, and Torture.

"Okay, Squirrelflight," Brook mewed cheerily. "Truth, Dare, Kiss, or Promise?"

"Dare!" the energetic she-cat squealed.

"All right..." Brook paused to think. "I dare you to ask out every single tom in a row until one of them says yes, and then, kiss the first one that says yes!"

"Okay!" Squirrelflight mewed. "Will you go out with me?"

"No."

"Will you go out with me?"

"No."

This went on for awhile.

"Blackstar," Squirrelflight mewed tiredly. "Will you go out with me?"

Blackstar was on his phone, playing Angry Birds. He didn't seem to notice Squirrelflight. But finally, he did. "Yes?" he mewed.

"OOOOH!" the cats oohed.

"NO!" Squirrelflight whimpered. "Can I forfeit?"

"If you want torture!" Brook rubbed her paws together evilly.

"Fine!" Squirrelflight pouted. She kissed Blackstar.

"EW!" the queens shielded the kits' eyes.

Brook was laughing very hard.

Bramblestar growled. "How dare you!" he hissed.

"Yes, how dare you kiss my man?" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR screeched.

"It was my dare!" Squirrelflight mewed.

"Oh. Right."

"All right, Jayfeather. Truth, dare, kiss, or promise?"

"Truth." Jayfeather grumbled.

"Boo!" everyone growled. "That's boring!"

"I don't think so!" Squirrelflight purred. "Jayfeather, who do you like more? Willowshine, Cinderheart, Briarlight, or THE STICK."

"OOOOH!" everyone purred. "This IS exciting!"

"Pick me, Jayfeather!" Willowshine whispered.

Jayfeather was silent for a moment. "I pick... THE STICK." he then ran over to where the stick lay. Then he began licking it.

"Wacko!" Whitestreak muttered.

The cats rolled around laughing.

"Well, since Jayfeather seems to be incapable of playing at the moment," Firestar glanced at his grandson. "I shall take his place. Princess," he mewed at his sister. "Truth, Dare, Kiss, or Promise?"

"Promise." Princess mewed. "Promise that you will give up the rest of your tacos to ThunderClan."

"NO!" screamed Princess. "I FORFEIT, I FORFEIT!"

"Then as your torture, you must kiss every single Dark Forest tom in this room!" Firestar laughed.

"WHAA!" Princess screamed, but she went on with her task.

The queens shielded the kits eyes again.

"Blackstar, truth, dare, kiss, or promise?" asked Russetfur.

"Dare!" Blackstar mewed, rubbing his big paws together.

Everyone's eyes widened. "OOOH!"

"Then I dare you to tell me who you like more- DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR or me!"

Blackstar's eyes widened, and he looked at DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR and Russetfur. His eyes went back and forth from each she-cat.

"I forfeit." he mewed after an hour.

"Then torture. And since it seems like this is torturing you, you have to tell us."

"DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR!" he blurted out the first name that came to his head.

Russetfur growled, and slapped him.

"Mistystar, Truth, Dare, Double Dare, Kiss, or Promise?" Blackstar asked. Mistystar purred.

"Kiss!"

"Then kiss Onestar."

"Okay!" they began kissing each other.

The queens gave up and shoved the kits into another room. They filled the room with toys, games, snacks, and a TV. So the kits watched Ted, That's My Boy, Chuckie, Nightmare on Elm Street, and all of those lovely rated "R" movies.

Silly queens.

* * *

The kits were then bouncing off the walls. They had drunk coffee, and Mountain Dew.

"SUGAR!" screamed Rainbowkit (the second one. Ferncloud had ANOTHER litter of kits. Would she ever give up?) She dove into a pile of sugar, along with another Sugarkit, and Donutkit, Crazykit, and Randomkit.

They were then joined by three more kits.

"Who are you?" asked Crazykit as he bounced off the walls.

"I'm Cloudkit, and these are my siblings, Sunnykit, and Blazekit!" the first kit, a white tom, mewed.

They were bombarded with questions by sugar-hyper kits.

"Are you a Clan cat?" asked Normalkit.

"Are you orphans?" asked Orphankit.

"Are you sexy and you know it?" Cinderxlion00kit asked, chugging down a giant Pixie Stick.

"Are we there yet?" asked Stupidkit.

"Yes, no, I think so, and we're already here." Sunnykit mewed.

"Who's your parents?"

"Hawkfire's our mom." Blazekit mewed.

"ALL HAIL THE PRINCES AND PRINCESS OF THE CLANS AND TRIBE!" the kits bowed.

"Ooh! Yay!" Blazekit mewed. "We're powerful! Anyways, my first royal decree is... LET THERE BE SUGAR!"

So the kits partied and made Hawkfire's three kits crowns out of the rarest candies and thrones from melted sugar, that was dyed, and royal clothes, spun out of sugar and dyed.

"WE ARE AMAZING!" screamed Sunnykit, as she partied in a crowd of toms.

"My second royal decree is..." Blazekit mewed. "LET THEM EAT CAKE!"

A giant cake fell on them.

"We should probably clean all this up." the kits surveyed their mess.

"Yeah."

They cleaned up everything, but not by throwing it in the trash, but by eating it all. Hungryforeverything helped them.

Duh.


	26. OMG

**I don't own E*Trade, or anything else in this story that you've seen before this story.**

* * *

It was a normal day in the Clans. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, Bramblestar was flirting with Fernlight, Blackstar and DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR were kissing, WindClan was sprinting around the lake, RiverClan was being RiverClan, and in ThunderClan, Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and Dovewing were up on Highledge, in bikinis, singing Katy Perry's "California Girls", while doing the macarena.

And then Jayfeather jumped off Highledge and began flying. So did Dovewing.

Lionblaze jumped off, stayed in midair for a moment, then plummeted to the ground. "How are you guys doing that?!" he called up.

"We're named after birds. And we are magical. We can fly, 'cuz birds can fly." Dovewing mewed. "I'm a winged dove, and Jayfeather's a feathery jay!"

"First, that makes no sense whatsoever, and second, what does that make me?"

"A flaming lion." Dovewing mewed simply.

Lionblaze burst into flames.

He screamed, and ran to the lake. He jumped in. "I AM NO LONGER A FLAMING LION!" he yelled.

And then Ferncloud ran to Lionblaze and tugged him out of the lake. "Come on!" she whined. "My little angels are doing a re-enactment, and they want the whole Clan there!"

"Okay..." Lionblaze mewed.

* * *

"Presenting... da E*Trade Baby!" Fartkit mewed.

A curtain went up, and E*Tradekit was sitting in a crib. "I will now re-enact some of the E*Trade baby's finest moments."

There was a scattered applause.

"Apparently, riding the dog like it is a pony is FROWNED UPON- IN THIS ESTABLISHMENT!" E*Tradekit mewed.

There were murmurs throughout the crowd.

"I don't think he said it right."

"Definitely not."

"THIS STINKS!" screamed a grumpy Jayfeather.

He had been pulled away from his stick for this. So he was very grumpy.

"Yeah! I'm out of here!" added Whitestreak.

The crowd left.

"Yes!" E*Tradekit mewed. "I have achieved world domination!"

"Let him think that." Fartkit mewed to everyone else.

They slowly moved away.

* * *

"Hello, my royal subjects!" Hawkfire yelled, stepping down from the sky. It was a Gathering. "I'm gonna pick cats to become all-powerful! Oh, and Whitestreak will help me. And my kits, maybe."

Whitestreak stepped down from the sky, and Hawkfire's kits tumbled after him.

"So, my first pick will be..." she scanned the crowd. "You there! What's your name?"

A handsome tannish tom stepped forward. "Me? My name's Eaglescreech."

"You shall be part of my group." Hawkfire nodded. "I give you the power to, um... turn into an eagle!" she clapped her paws. "There we go! C'mon up into the clouds."

Whitestreak observed the cats. "You there, Swiftstorm, I think..." he mewed. "You are my selection. I give you the power of superspeed." he clapped his paws. "Up you go."

The three kits looked at all the cats. "We want a kit!" Sunnykit mewed.

"We choose... ORPHANKIT!" screamed Blazekit. He was having a sugar high. He had broken into a giant container of Pixie Stix.

"We give you the power of awesomeness!" Cloudkit began to boogie.

Everyone blinked, and saw that Orphankit was AWESOME.

"Come with us, to the palace in the clouds!" sang Sunnykit.

"Now, my next selection is..." Hawkfire made her "thinking face". "Cinderblaze! And I give you the powers for... um... Randomness!" they high-pawed, and Cinderblaze went into the clouds.

"Isn't it so wonderful that our little girl is an all powerful-" Cinderheart was interrupted.

Cinderblaze poked her head down from the clouds and screamed, "INTERRUPTING COW!"

The Clans, bewildered, stared at her.

"That's the randomness taking over!" Hawkfire mewed cheerily.

"I now choose Shadowheart. And I give her the powers for explosions!"

"Wut." the Clans whispered.

Shadowheart blew up the lake.

"Whoa..." She bowed, and went into the clouds.

"I now pick... Cinderxlion00kit!" Sunnykit mewed. "She is also given the powers for randomness!"

"Whee! INTERRUPTING COW!" squealed Cinderxlion00kit, prancing up to the clouds.

"I shall now pick... Fernlight!" mewed Hawkfire. "And she is given the powers for water and light! And of course, prettiness. But she's already got that."

"Why her?" groaned Whitestreak.

"Shut it." growled Fernlight.

"Fernlight's cool. You got a problem with dat, doode?" Hawkfire mewed.

"Maybe..."

"Oh! So, our last kit is Trollkit! He shall be given an iron claw!" Blazekit mewed, swaying. He was crashing. He swayed once more, then fell down. Hawkfire sighed, and carried him back up into the clouds.

Sunnykit clapped her paws and led Trollkit into the palace in the clouds, and Hawkfire came down.

"My last pick will be Cloudfeather. I give you the power to use makeup as weapons!" Whitestreak mewed, clapping his paws, while leading Cloudfeather up to the clouds.

"Awkward..." the Clans muttered.

"So, our last pick of the night shall be..." Hawkfire paused dramatically.

"HI!" screamed a she-cat, charging onto the island. "I'M STARSTAR! I WANTS TO BE PART OF THIS GROUP!" she screamed. She ran up to Hawkfire. "PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!"

"FINE!" Hawkfire was so irritated she agreed.

"I give you the power for eyes that will make anyone do anything you want!"

"YESH!" Starstar screamed. "GET ME A DONUT!" she stared at Hawkfire.

"It doesn't work on me." Hawkfire hissed. "Up into the clouds."

And then another she-cat came in.

"Oh boy..." Hawkfire sighed.

"I am Angelhalo!" announced the she-cat. She was so young she looked like she could be a kit. She had chocolate brown fur and shining blue eyes, and she was BEAUTIFUL.

"Ooh!" oohed the toms, rushing up to her. Bramblestar began making kissy faces at her.

Thornclaw began flirting with her. "Hey baby, you and me, tonight?"

"God no." Angelhalo huffed.

Peetahotness walked up to her. "How 'bout me?"

"YES!" screamed Angelhalo. "Pricklethistle, clear my schedule! I've got a date!"

Pricklethistle, a gray tom with spiky fur, nodded. "Okay. You were clear anyways..."

"Whatever." Katnisspaw pouted. "But he's destined to be with ME!"

"You wish." Angelhalo puffed.

"You two are related!" yelled Dustpelt.

"Oh..." Katnissprettypaws mewed. "Then Hawkfire, make me daughter of another family!"

"No. You do not boss me." Hawkfire growled.

"INTERRUPTING COW!" screamed Cinderxlion00kit and Cinderblaze.

"Please?" Katnissprettypaws begged.

"Okay..." Hawkfire clapped her paws. "You are now the kit of Daisy and Solar."

"Kay, thanks! NOW I'm destined to be with him!" Katnissprettypaws growled at Angelhalo.

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"INTERRUPTING COW!"

* * *

**Please tell me if I missed your cat in this whole "Powerful" thing. And oh yeah, many people who answered the question didn't tell me what powers they wanted. So please tell me if you want your powers changed.**


	27. IDK what to call this!

******I don't own Usher, Pitbull, David Guetta, Ludacris, or anything else.**

* * *

"Grr!" Bramblestar was attacking a potato.

Whitestreak appeared beside him. "Why are you attacking that potato?"

"Because Squirrelflight won't let me be mates with Fernlight."

"Okay..." Whitestreak face-pawed. "But why would you want to be mates with my sister?"

"Cuz she's HAWT!" Bramblestar drooled.

Whitestreak slapped him.

Bramblestar cried.

Then Heartshadow skipped by. "FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!" she sang (Ludacris', Usher's, and David Guetta's new song!). She then tried to spank Whitestreak. But since Whitestreak is invincible to less-powerful cats, it didn't hurt.

"Uh-oh!" Heartshadow whispered. She ran away before Whitestreak got back at her.

"Hey, does anyone notice how David Guetta is a singer, but he never participates in the songs he says are his?" Usherkit (GEEZ, Ferncloud, stop having kits!).

"Yeah." Sugarkit mewed, eating a candy cane.

"Why is that?" Usherkit asked.

"BECAUSE HE STINKS AT SINGING!" Pitbullkit sang.

"Oh. That makes sense." Usherkit mewed.

"FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!" screamed the kits.

"Hey, kits, come here!" Fernlight chirped.

"Okay!" Stupidkit mewed.

They followed Fernlight out of camp and into her secret lair (oooh!).

All of the kits were there.

"So, here's the deal," Fernlight mewed. "You are going to attack the Clans. I want to be the supreme leader!"

"What will we get out of it?" Orphankit asked.

"Candy!"

"KK!" Orphankit mewed, running out of the lair, and she then conquered RichClan.

"SO DANCE DANCE LIKE IT'S THE LAST LAST NIGHT OF YOUR LIFE!" screamed Usherkit, leading the ThunderClan kits into battle.

Ninjakit ran around, using nunchucks to spank Purdy, who was telling a story about being spanked by nunchucks.

"RESPECT YOUR ELDERS!" screamed Hollyleaf, running towards Ninjakit.

Ninjakit spanked her and she ran away screaming.

Fernlight laughed. "Mwa ha ha ha!"

Hawkfire snorted. "You know, you can't take over the Clans. I've already done that."

"OH! DANG!" screamed Fernlight. "I messed up!"

The kits hurried over to her.

"Where's our candy?"

"You didn't take over the Clans, so no candy for you!" Fernlight mewed.

"Grr..." The kits attacked her.

Fernlight held them off and ran to her lair.

* * *

"We shall now have a contest!" Hawkfire announced. "I shall give awards for things!"

"Cool!"

They were poofed to an auditorium.

Hawkfire purred. "So, we have categories for the epicest, stupidest, prettiest she-cat, hottest tom, randomest, brattiest, ugliest, and sanest! Please use your electronic devices to nominate!"

The cats nominated.

"Great!" Hawkfire mewed. "So, for the stupidest, we have Fartkit, Stupidkit, Dumbheart, and E*Tradekit!"

The cats applauded as the three nominees walked onstage.

"As for the prettiest she-cats, we have Fernlight, Swiftstorm, Cloudfeather, Angelhalo, Sweetcat, Gorgeousleaf, and Whispersong!"

"Who's Whispersong?" asked the cats.

A pretty blue-gray she-cat walked up.

The toms drooled.

"As for the hottest toms, we have Solar, Whitestreak, Trollkit, Peetahotness, and Eaglescreech!"

The she-cats drooled as they walked up onto stage.

"As for the brattiest, we have Spoiledkit and Whinykit!"

"The ugliest, we have Forever-alonekit and Freakishlyoldface!"

"As for the sanest, we have... no one!" Hawkfire mewed.

"Yay!" everyone applauded.

"As for the epicest, we have... Whitestreak, Fernlight, Goldenwing, Shadowheart, and myself!" Hawkfire purred.

"Yay!" the cats applauded.

"And lastly, we have the randomest. We have Lionblaze, Cinderblaze, Cinderxlion00kit, Heartshadow, Hungryforeverything, and Starstar!"

"Awesome!" the cats applauded.


	28. Here comes the Unwilling Bride!

**Well, here are the current stats for the voting:**

**Prettiest she-cat: Swiftstorm (O votes), Sweetcat (O votes) Cloudfeather (1 vote), Whispersong (1 vote), Angelhalo (2 votes), Gorgeousleaf (3 votes), and Fernlight (3 votes)**

**Hottest tom: Solar (1 vote), Eaglescreech (1 vote), Trollkit (1 vote), Peetahotness (3 votes), and Whitestreak (5 votes)**

**Stupidest: Dumbheart (2 votes), Fartkit (2 votes), E*Tradekit (2 votes), and Stupidkit (5 votes)  
**

**Brattiest: Spoiledkit (3 votes) and Whinykit (6 votes)**

**Ugliest: Freakishlyoldface (7 votes) and Forever-alonekit (3 votes)**

**Randomest: Cinderblaze (O votes), Cinderxlion00kit (1 vote), Lionblaze (1 vote), Hungryforeverything (1 vote), Heartshadow (1 vote), and Starstar (5 votes)**

**Epicest: Fernlight (O votes), Whitestreak (1 vote), Goldenwing (1 vote), Shadowheart (1 vote), and Hawkfire (6 votes)**

**Remember, there's only two more chapters before voting is done!**

* * *

Bramblestar was whacking his iPhone with a plastic hammer. "WHERE IS RYAN SEACREST?!" he screamed at it.

He was listening to "American Top 40" with Ryan Seacrest.

"What are you doing?" Squirrelflight yelled at him.

"TRYING TO FIND RYAN SEACREST! SIRI KEEPS TELLING ME THAT SHE'S FOUND HIM, BUT SHE WON'T TELL ME WHERE HE IS!"

"That's because it's part of the show, dumbhead!" Jayfeather screamed at him.

"YOU ARE SO MEAN!" cried Bramblestar.

"Whatever!"

* * *

**Meanwhile, on a cloud that was the beauty salon... O.o**

"I am so gonna win beauty thing!" Angelhalo purred, as she got a massage from Pricklethistle.

Fernlight snorted, as she got her fur done. "You wish."

"I am the original pretty kitty, so I will win!" Gorgeousleaf declared, as she got a pedicure.

"In your dreams," Swiftstorm growled. "I shall win."

"Jingle bells, Fernlight smells-" Whispersong sang.

"Oh, shut up!" screamed Fernlight, spraying her in the face with perfume.

Whispersong screamed. "MY EYES, MY EYES!"

"Haha!" Sweetcat laughed.

Cloudfeather shot Lipstick Lazars at her.

"OH NOES!" wailed Sweetcat. "YOU SMUDGED MY EYESHADOW!"

Fernlight then flooded the beauty salon and that was the end of that.

* * *

"I have an announcement!" screamed Mistystar. "We are going to have an International Language day!"

"Oh mon dieu, c'est tellement cool!" squealed Blackstar.

"Oh my gosh, that is so cool." The Translator mewed.

"Go back to where you came from, donut!" Bramblestar used a teleportation device and zapped him into the Dark Forest.

"Was werden wir tun, ohne einen Übersetzer?" screamed Orphankit.

"Aku tidak mengerti itu! Mengatakannya dalam bahasa Inggris!" yelled Fernlight.

"Saya tidak tahu!" mewed Bluestar.

"QUESTO DEVE SMETTERE! Piantala! ORA!" yelled Bramblestar.

"¿QUÉ?" yelled the cats.

"STOP IT!" screamed Englishkit. (He's named Englishkit for a reason, people!)

"TACOS!" screamed Cinderxlion00kit.

Nacho mountain fell on them.

And then a donut carriage pulled up. There were donuts for wheels, and a giant munchkin as the place to sit.

Starstar stepped out, doing the "royal wave". "I am Starstar, queen of donuts!" she had on a gown made of donuts, and a tiara with precious donut gemstones (O.o).

"All hail Starstar!" the cats bowed. "Good, now, donuts for all!" she clapped her paws, and donuts fell from the sky.

"Wow, Starstar, you're MAGICAL!" gasped Bramblestar, munching on a chocolate-glazed donut.

Starstar grinned.

What really happened was that Hawkfire's kits had been fighting over who got the Sprinkles donut, and the box spilled.

But of course, Starstar wouldn't tell them that.

She actually thought she had done it.

* * *

"I have an announcement," Tigerstar mewed. "I am going to marry Gorgeousleaf!"

"What the..." the cats grumbled.

"I was forced into marriage, okay?" Gorgeousleaf sobbed.

Fernlight and the other pretty she-cats were rolling on the ground, laughing.

They were poofed to a church.

* * *

The groomsmen were Hawkfrost, Darkstripe, Brokenstar, Shredtail, and Antpelt.

The Best Man was Thistleclaw.

The bridesmaids were Cloudfeather, Swiftstorm, Angelhalo, Sweetcat, and Whispersong.

The Maid of Honor was Fernlight, who looked confused, considering she and Gorgeousleaf hated each other.

The ring bearer was Bramblestar.

The flower girls were Cinderxlion00kit, Goldenwing, and Mapleshade.

"I have no control over my life!" sobbed Gorgeousleaf as she walked down the aisle with Dustpelt.

The minister walked out. It was Purdy. "So, let's get started..." Purdy mewed.

It took a week for him to finish the ceremony, because he told about a jillion different stories between sentences.

* * *

**After a week...**

"Do you, Tigerstar, take this hot, gorgeous, wimpy excuse of a she-cat to be your wife?'' Purdy rumbled.

"I do!" Tigerstar began making kissy faces at Gorgeousleaf.

"And do you, Gorgeousleaf, take this evil, cheating, failure-in-life, no-good son of a kittypet to be your husband?"

"I don't!"

"Sweetie, this is where you say yes!" Tigerstar said in a falsely calm voice.

"No-"

A cat jumped in through the window, Ninjakit following her. She karate-chopped Tigerstar. "She doesn't nee to be forced to do anything!" she screamed.

"Who says?" Tigerstar growled.

"I do-" the she-cat was cut off, when she saw Crowfeather. "CROWY!" she screamed, running over to him. "I LOVE YOU!"

"Chill out!" Crowfeather yelled. "Who are you, anyways?"

"WIDOW!" screamed the she-cat, making kissy faces.

"AHHH!" everyone screamed for no apparent reason. They ran away.

Tigerstar forced Gorgeousleaf to say "yes" while Widow flirted with Crowfeather.

"I guess it won't be too bad," Gorgeousleaf mewed. "I mean, evil is very in right now."

"Ya." Tigerstar mewed.

And then Gorgeousleaf's phone went off. "Oop, seems as if evil is out right now. I'm filing a divorce. See ya." she walked off.

"NO!" Tigerstar wailed.

Bluestar appeared beside him. "Why you so sad, Tigger?"

"She took my CARROT."

**Dun, dun, dun...**


	29. Never let a blind cat drive a plane

**Wow, 205 reviews! Thank you all who reviewed! (Hugs everyone who reviewed)**

**Please let it be known that this story is only rated "T" just in case I go overboard. And I don't know what the age range is for the people who are reading this. So please try to use approprate language in your reviews, cuz I'd rather not lose readers. _MOST_ of your reviews are fine, but I just needed to get that out there.**

**Here are the results for the voting so far:**

**Stupidest: Dumbheart (2), Fartkit (4), E*Tradekit (4), and Stupidkit (8)**

**Prettiest she-cat: Sweetcat (0), Swiftstorm (0), Cloudfeather (1), Whispersong (2), Angelhalo (3), Gorgeousleaf, and Fernlight (7)**

**Hottest tom: Trollkit (1), Solar (2), Eaglescreech (3), Peetahotness (4), and Whitestreak (8)**

**Brattiest: Spoiledkit (7) and Whinykit (8)**

**Ugliest: Forever-alonekit (5) and Freakishlyoldface (12)**

**Randomest: Heartshadow (1), Lionblaze (1), Hungryforeverything (1), Cinderxlion00kit (2), Cinderblaze (2), and Starstar (9)**

**Epicest: Whitestreak (1), Fernlight (1), Shadowheart (1), Goldenwing (1), and Hawkfire (12)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Warriors (Sob, sob)**

* * *

Whitestreak was bored. So he was playing with his powers in his and Fernlight's house (they're siblings. They live together!). And then he turned out the lights with his "darkness" power.

Fernlight stormed into Whitestreak's room, hairdryer in paw, and her fur all poofy and her fur was covered in ashes. "WHAT THE HECK!" she screamed, flinging the hairdryer at Whitestreak, and then blasting the lights back on. She then used her water powers and sent a full-force blast of water at him, and it sent him flying. He slammed into the wall.

Whitestreak growled and sent fire at Fernlight. She ducked, but it still singed her fur.

Then Hawkfire came into the house. "Hey guys, do you-" she mewed, but was cut off when some of the fire touched her tail. She screeched, and had to stomp on her tail to stop it. She screeched, because that hurt, too. She then sent fire at Whitestreak and water at Fernlight.

"AARGH!" screeched Fernlight. She attacked Hawkfire, her claws unsheathed. Hawkfire yowled and attacked back. Whitestreak hissed and leaped on both of them.

**And that was our random fight scene.**

* * *

"Yo! Cats down below!" screamed Hawkfire. "I'm going to send you people to Everythingville. It has everything you could ever imagine!"

"Are there clothing shops?" asked Gorgeousleaf.

"Yes." Hawkfire mewed.

"Are there food places?" asked Hungryforeverything.

"Yes." Hawkfire mewed.

"Are there-"

"YES!" screamed Hawkfire. "THERE'S EVERYTHING! THERE'S A REASON IT'S CALLED EVERYTHINGVILLE!"

"Oh." everyone said.

"Now, onto the plane!" Hawkfire mewed. "We have a two-day flight to go through!"

Everyone boarded the plane.

"Are we there yet?" Sugarkit asked.

"No. We've been on the plane for two minutes. We haven't even started to fly yet!" Ferncloud mewed.

"So?" Stupidkit mewed. "We may be there."

"No, we couldn't. We haven't moved!"

Stupidkit shifted in his seat. "I moved. Are we there yet?"

"NO!" screamed Ferncloud.

Orphankit ran by. "Whee!"

"I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!" screamed Blazekit.

"I DON'T CARE!" roared Blackstar.

"Buckle your seatbelts!" yelled the pilot. "We are taking off!"

The pilot was Jayfeather.

"Did I ever tell you the story of the time I went on a plane that had a blind pilot?" mewed Purdy.

"YES!" screamed Tigerstar, hugging his knees. "NO MORE STORIES, YOU ELDERLY HAG!" he began to sob.

Purdy was unfazed by Tigerstar's cries.

"Oh! Did I ever tell you the story about when someone called me an elderly hag?"

"Yes!" Tigerstar cried.

"Did I tell you the story of where-"

"Yes."

"Did I tell you the story of-"

"Yes."

"Did I tell you the story-"

"Yes."

"Did I tell you the-"

"Yes."

"Did I tell you-"

"Yes."

"Did I tell-"

"Yes."

"Did I-"

"Yes."

"Did-"

"Yes."

"..."

"YES!" screamed Tigerstar.

The plane took off. Sugarkit ate some sugar and became hyper.

Ferncloud got more annoyed with her kits.

Bramblestar decided to make a lot of the kits warriors.

Yes, he had them skip apprenticeship.

**1. Partydisco**

**2. Kittypetpet**

**3. Pussinboots**

**4. Foxcatcher**

**5. Normalcat**

**6. Eggnogjug**

**7. Shoefoot**

**8. Fartface**

**9. Treebranch**

**10. Kitkatkit**

**11. Gangnamstyle**

**12. PSYguy**

**13. StrawberryChapstick-Lionblaze-can't-touch-dis**

**14. Cherrybomb**

**15. Pickleface**

**16. Jinglejangle**

**17. Sol-Is-So-Annoyingblah**

**18. Eaglescreech JR.**

**19. Hawkfire Jr.**

**20. Hollyrules**

**21. Skittlesrock**

**22. Teddyboobear**

**23. Shrewfoot**

**24. Mousefang**

**25. Bunnyhop**

**26. OMG-LOL**

**27. Shinyobject**

**28. Sparkleshine**

**29. Brownieyumyum**

**30. Insanekitty**

**31. ToomanykitsFerncloud**

**32. Cinderxlion00isawesome**

**33. Trollface**

**34. Forever-Aloneforever**

**35. HarryPotterhalfblood**

**36. HermioneGrangermudblood**

**37. RonWeasleypure-blood**

And then they crash-landed in EverythingVille.

They learned one thing from the flight.

Never let a blind cat drive an airplane.


	30. The weirdness in EverythingVille

**Well, the stats are the same as the last chapter's. So if you haven't voted yet, VOTE! I will post the winners tommorow, and I have virtual prizes that I will say tommorow. But let this be known: if you are the creator of one of the cats who won, you will be one of the people who get a virtual prize!**

* * *

The cats stumbled off the plane.

"Well, let's go to the hotel!" Hawkfire mewed cheerily.

"We have a hotel?"

"Well, duh. I rented us the biggest hotel I could find! It's also magical. You each have your own room, if you want it like that, and whatever you want it to be designed like, then it shall be like that!" Hawkfire mewed.

"Ooh..." Sugarkit rubbed her paws together. That couldn't be good.

* * *

They went to the hotel.

Cloudfeather opened her door.

It was designed like a beauty salon.

Normalcat opened his door.

It was designed normally.

Forever-Aloneforever opened his door.

It had a lot of mirrors.

Starstar opened her door.

It had many, many, many donuts.

Sugarkit opened her door.

And wouldn't you know it, it was designed with sugar and candy and soda and that type of stuff.

She dove onto the bed, which was made out of sugar, and ate it.

"Attention, kittehs!" Hawkfire's voice went over the intercom. "Meet me in the lobby!"

"But I just started eating!" Sugarkit whined at the speakers. But she obliged.

As the Clans and the Tribe and the rogues, loners, and kittypets gathered in the lobby, Hawkfire began to speak. "So, first things firs-" her voice trailed off.

Nobody was paying attention to her. They were looking at Fernlight. But Fernlight wasn't Fernlight. Unless Fernlight's eyes colors magically changed in about two minutes.

Well, it wasn't Fernlight. Because the real, green-eyed Fernlight was staring at the she-cat.

"Who are you?" asked Ferncloud.

"This is Moonfeather." Fernlight mewed. "My sister."

"Is she your twin?" Bramblestar mewed. "Cuz she's smokin!" he walked up to to Moonfeather. "Hey baby, you and me tonight?"

"No." she growled.

"Pooey."

"Now, here's the deal. All of you get fifty billion dollars. Use it however you want." Hawkfire clapped her paws. Everyone got wads of cash.

"YES!" screamed the cats. They then ran out of the building.

The queens and she-cats went shopping for clothes and accessories and makeup and that type of stuff.

The toms practically went to Vegas.

The kits, the kits who skipped apprenticeship, and apprentices went to the toy stores, candy shops, and that stuff.

The elders, well, went to do whatever elders do.

* * *

"WHEE!" screamed Sugarkit, diving into candy mountain.

Pitbullkit was flying around on a nyan cat.

Usherkit and Blazekit were playing with Gogos.

"Those are so old!" yelled Orphankit.

Blazekit snorted. "Says the cat who is riding one of the first bicycles invented."

"Who would that be?" Orphankit mewed innocently, hopping off the bike and pushing it away, sending it clattering into a rack of magic 8 balls.

"Ooh! Magic 8 balls!" E*Tradekit mewed. "Hey, miss Magic 8 Ball, am I stupid?"

"No" the magic 8 ball read.

E*Tradekit growled, and tossed it onto the ground. "This thing lies!"

The kits snorted with laughter.

"He's right," whispered Orphankit.

* * *

"OMG OMG OMG!" screamed Sweetcat, running over to a store window and smushing her face into the glass. "That is so beautiful!" She was staring at a very sparkly silver dress, with matching silver heels.

The she-cats oohed.

"This would be perfect for when I accept my prize for being the most beautiful she-cat!" Gorgeousleaf tossed her fur.

"You're not going to win, I am!" Angelhalo snapped. "Along with Peetahotness..." her voice trailed off and she stared at the dress dreamily.

Fernlight smacked her in the face. "Snap out of it, you psychotic she-cat!"

Angelhalo screeched and attacked Fernlight.

A worker ran out of the shop. "Oh my..." she whispered, then raised her voice. "SECURITY!"

"We'll be going," Swiftstorm mewed hastily. She grabbed the fighting she-cats and they got the heck outta there, the other she-cats following.

* * *

The toms were at a casino.

They failed every time, and were just throwing all their money away. Except for Whitestreak, Solar, Eaglescreech, and Peetahotness, who were too awesome to lose.

Peetahotness had already won five billion dollars, a Mustang, and three dozen movie tickets (O.o)

Eaglescreech had won seven billion dollars and 45 cents, and an all-you-can-eat certificate to a very large buffet that contained everything. The bad news was, Hungryforeverything had stolen it. He was already out of money. Not because he had blown it all, because he'd eaten it.

Solar had won eighty million dollars, three Ferraris, a Mustang, a better mate, and five plasma screen TVs.

But even all of the three toms winnings combined compared to Whitestreak.

He had won 100,000,000,000,000,001 dollars, fifty Ferraris, eighty movie tickets, a thousand-dollar gift card to Pier One Imports, five Mustangs, a racing car, Calvin Harris, a certificate for free ketchup, a ping-pong table, a house renovation certificate, a private jet, a pool table, a piece of gum from a random tom, and fifty phone numbers from fifty different hot she-cats.

* * *

I won't discuss the elders, because they're just sleeping at an old folks' home while Purdy tells them stories about sleeping at an old folks' home.

Simple as that.

* * *

When they got back to the hotel, Hawkfire ran to them with some news. "We've gotta go home," she mewed.

"Why?"

"Because we need to get ready for the holidays!"


	31. The Holidays, Part 1

Back home, Hawkfire was distributing orders. "Fernlight and Moonfeather, go get the most amazing Christmas tree you can find. Sandstorm and Firestar, go get Christmas lights and some decorations. Ferncloud and Dustpelt, take your kits and go get decorations for the tree. Angelhalo, Prickleface, and Gorgeousleaf, go get stockings. Squirrelflight and Leafpool, go buy wrapping paper, gift bags, bows, and tags. Starstar, Goldenwing, and Bluestar, go get Christmas movies and music. Swiftstorm, Cloudfeather, and Sweetcat, go get wreaths and things like that. Tigerstar, Hawkfrost, and Bramblestar, go get the Christmas dinner. Here's the list of things you need to buy," she handed the three toms a list. "Oh yeah, get table decorations too. Make sure they're pretty!" she chirped. "When we're all done, we're gonna buy Christmas presents, and do some games!"

"Yay!" the cats ran off to do their jobs.

* * *

Fernlight and Moonfeather wandered through the tree shop. Trees here, trees there. Needles kept getting stuck between their paws and claws.

"Ooh, how about this one?" Moonfeather squealed.

Fernlight looked up at the tree. It was thirty-five feet tall. "No, too short." she huffed. "Oh, this one is the one!"

It was a hundred feet tall.

"YES!" screamed Moonfeather.

"HEY, DUDE! GET YO BUTT OVER HERE!" Fernlight yelled over to the salescat who was discussing a tree with another client.

The tom looked over. His eyes popped when he saw the two she-cats. He ran over to them. "Hot twins!" breathed. "W-w-what can I do for you two?"

Fernlight nodded at Moonfeather. This was exactly like they needed him. Enchanted by their beauty. "Um, yes, can you tell me how much this tree is?" Fernlight gestured towards the tree.

"F-f-for you, it's free!" he stammered.

"Okay then, can you bring it to where we need it?"

"You mean your car?"

"Oh no." Fernlight mewed. "To the Clans!

"But I can't carry it!" the tom protested.

"She'll kiss you under the mistletoe!" Moonfeather shoved Fernlight forward.

"NO!" screamed Fernlight, sliding away from her sister. "She'll kiss you!"

"If you both kiss me, we have a deal." the tom mewed dreamily, his eyes hearts.

Fernlight pouted.

Moonfeather frowned.

"All right." they agreed.

* * *

"Oh, these lights are pretty! How about these?" Sandstorm shoved a box of lights into Firestar's face.

"They're plain lights!" Firestar growled.

"Exactly! Simple is pretty!" Sandstorm squealed.

"No, it isn't," Firestar told her. "But these are!" he shoved a box into Sandstorm's face.

"Rainbow lights?" Sandstorm gasped.

"YESH!" Firestar began to dance.

"Fine, we'll get some of each," Sandstorm said.

"KK!" Firestar mewed cheerily.

* * *

"Ooh, let's get these ornaments!" Sugarkit squealed, pointing at candy canes.

"Those are candy canes!" Stupidkit mewed. "Literally. Candy canes! You eat them, not put them on the tree!"

"GASP!" Pitbullkit asked. "Could Stupidkit actually become un-dumb?"

Sugarkit bit into one of the candy canes. "EW!" she screamed. "THIS IS PLASTIC!"

"Oops..." Stupidkit mewed stupidly.

Weirdkit then threw in all of the ornaments into the shopping cart.

* * *

Angelhalo puffed. "So Hawkfire just sent us to get stockings?"

"Not just stockings. We've gotta pick out ones that suits everyone!" Gorgeousleaf mewed cheerily.

"Oh god." Angelhalo growled. She pulled stockings off of the rack. They had coal patterns on them. "These are for everyone besides me!" and she pulled a very pretty one off another rack- it had blinking lights and present boxes stitched on it. "This is mine!" she purred.

Gorgeousleaf attacked her.

* * *

"OMG, I love this wrapping paper!" Squirrelflight purred, grabbing the wrapping paper roll and hugging it tightly. Then she shoved it in Leafpool's face. "Look, cows! And it says "Mooey Christmas" and "Happy Moo Year!" she fell onto the floor laughing.

"Cut it out, Squirrelflight!" Leafpool sighed. "We should buy more serious wrapping paper."

"You lie!" Squirrelflight hugged the wrapping paper.

Leafpool reached out and grabbed it. "Put. It. Back. Squirrelflight!"

"Never!" screamed Squirrelflight, tugging it towards her.

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!

"YES!"

"NO!"

They pulled so hard they ripped the wrapping paper.

A salescat stormed up to them. "I hope you're going to pay for that," she growled.

"Yes, yes, we are." Leafpool sighed, placing the wrapping paper in the basket.

* * *

"Hm, so... what movies do we want to get?" asked Goldenwing.

"This one, and this one, and this one..." Bluestar pulled every Christmas movie in sight down and into the cart.

"You pyscho kitty, put all of those back!" Goldenwing snapped.

"NO!" Bluestar screamed, hugging the videos. "MINE!"

"No, they're mine!" yelled Starstar as she munched on a donut.

"NEVER!" screamed Bluestar, running away with the videos.

Starstar ran after her.

"Well, seeing that I'm the only sane cat here, I'll be getting the videos. And the music." Goldenwing sighed.

* * *

"So, girls, what wreaths do we want?" Cloudfeather asked.

"Um, pretty ones." Sweetcat sighed. "Duh."

Swiftstorm rolled her eyes. "C'mon, let's get this done. The sooner the better!"

"Oh yeah, I am so gonna win this beauty competition!" Cloudfeather purred.

"No, I am!" Sweetcat growled.

"No, I am!" Swiftstorm growled.

They broke into a fight.

* * *

"Okay," Bramblestar mewed. "We need a ham."

"Get this." Hawkfrost grabbed the first thing he saw and plunked it in the cart.

"This is grape juice!" Bramblestar stared at the item. He grabbed the grape juice and placed it back onto the shelf.

"I like grape juice!" Hawkfrost growled.

"You've never tried it!" Tigerstar snapped.

"I want to try it." Hawkfrost grumped.

"No." Bramblestar growled.

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"GIVE ME THE GRAPE JUICE!" Hawkfrost screamed.

"NO!"

Hawkfrost began to cry.

A queen walked by, pushing a cart with two little kits in it. "Give the kit his grape juice!" she snapped. "Your argument and raised voices are scaring my children!"

Tigerstar and Bramblestar looked into the cart. The little kits were cowering and whimpering.

"Whoops, sorry." Tigerstar mewed. "We'll buy it."

Bramblestar growled. "Tigerstar, we can't buy that! Hawkfire-" he paused. "Wait... did that she-cat just call Hawkfrost a baby?"

"Yes." Tigerstar mewed, confused.

They looked at Hawkfrost.

He was about five times smaller than he should be. And he was sucking his paw.

"Something is not right about this situation." Tigerstar mewed.

* * *

"Okay, now, the moment you've all been waiting for!" Hawkfire mewed. "The winning cats are being announced today!"

"Yay!" the cats cheered.

"So, first up, the stupidest!" Hawkfire purred. "In fourth place, we have two votes, with Dumbheart!"

"Yay!" the cats applauded when Dumbheart walked up.

"Well, maybe next time." Hawkfire nodded.

Dumbheart cocked his head. "What?"

"And in third place, with four votes, we have E*Tradekit!"

"YAY! I have achieved MORE world domination!" E*Tradekit cheered.

"Okay..." Hawkfire mewed. "And in second place, with five votes, we have Fartface! So that means, in first place, with ten votes, we have Stupidkit!"

"Whoopie!" Stupidkit flounced up. "Wait, why am I being called up? Am I in trouble?"

"No, sweetie, you won the most stupidest award!" Hawkfire mewed.

"Okay!" Stupidkit mewed. "Yay?"

"Sure." Hawkfire shrugged. "Anyways, your prize is a golden pineapple!"

"Okay!" purred Stupidkit as a cat came out and handed him his prize. "Thanks." he took a bite out of the pineapple.

"Next up, the prettiest she-cat!" Hawkfire purred. "Can we have the nominees up here on the stage!"

The she-cats walked up.

"Okay, so tied in sixth place, we have Sweetcat and Swiftstorm, with zero votes. Sorry, guys, better luck next time." Hawkfire mewed solemnly.

The two she-cats slunk offstage.

"And in next place, with one vote, we have Cloudfeather!" Hawkfire mewed. "Again, better luck next time."

Cloudfeather sighed and walked off.

"Next, we have Whispersong, with two votes!"

Whispersong walked offstage.

"Now, down to the final three," Hawkfire squealed. "In third place, we have Angelhalo!"

"NOOOOO!" screamed Angelhalo, jumping up and down. "I should've won! I DEMAND A RECOUNT!"

"Security!" yelled Hawkfire.

Security rushed out onto stage and pulled Angelhalo away, who kicked, screamed, and spat.

"She's gone rabid," whispered Moonfeather, from where she sat in the front row.

"And in second place, we have Gorgeousleaf!" Hawkfire nodded. "Well done!"

Gorgeousleaf nodded, being gracious with her defeat.

"So that means Fernlight wins! She had ten votes!"

"Fernlight! Fernlight!" cheered the cats.

"You get a golden apple!" purred Hawkfire, pawing her a golden apple.

"Yay!" Fernlight skipped offstage.

"Now, for the hottest tom, in last place, we have Trollface! Better luck next time!" Hawkfire mewed. "Now, in next place, we have Eaglescreech! And then Solar! In second place, we have Peetahotness, leaving Whitestreak to be the winner of the "Hottest Tom" category! Well done! You also get a golden apple!"

Whitestreak coolly and nonchalantly accepted his prize. He then whooped, all dignity lost, and leaped offstage.

"Well then. Next, for brattiest! It was a tight race, but in the end, Whinykit won! Here, you get a golden peach!"

"NOOO!" screamed Spoiledkit, doing an "Angelhalo". "I demand a recount! I deserve to win!"

Security took him away.

"Next up, ugliest! It was a decent race, but only one can win! And that is... Freakishlyoldface! C'mon up! Freaky, you get... a golden rainbow!"

"YEA!" Freakishlyoldface began to boogie. Then he groaned. "Ow... my back..."

"Well, that's old people for you, folks! Next up, we have randomness! And tied in last place, we have Heartshadow, Lionblaze, and Hungryforeverything! And in second place, we have a tie between Cinderblaze and Cinderxlion00isawesome! The winner is Starstar! You get a golden donut!"

"BOO-YA!" the Donut Queen accepted her prize and then she kissed it. "YESH!"

"Now, for the epicest! In last place we have Shadowheart! And next, we have a tie between Whitestreak, Fernlight, and Goldenwing. That means..." she gasped. "I'm the winner of the epicest! OMG OMG OMG THANK YOU ALL!" she leaped off the stage and hugged every single cat in the auditorium. "YOU ARE ALL AMAZING!"

Cheetos fell from the sky.

They partied.

And then they bought their Christmas presents.

* * *

**Next chapter will be about the cats' Christmas!**

**Thank you guys so much for voting! Anyways, I'll probably do this again, considering more cats have sent in their cats.**

**But here's the deal: If you created one of the cats who won an award, I shall dedicate a chapter to you, and have that chapter be all about that cat! I think that's a pretty good prize...**

**Again, thanks so much! Thanks for voting for me! OMG I feel so special...**

**HAPPY HOLIDAYS!**

**-Chucklez**


	32. The Holidays Part 2

"Hey, guys!" Fernlight pranced into ThunderClan with Moonfeather. "What's-"

"Grr!" screamed Angelhalo, attacking her.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, chill out!" yowled Fernlight, flinging Angelhalo off. "What's wrong with her?"

"Well, I checked her out last night, y'know, because she seemed to be having a fit about not winning the beauty thing, and apparently, not winning turned her rabid!" Moonfeather mewed.

Fernlight stared at her. "You're kidding."

"Nope."

"Whoa..."

"Well, I can't blame her." Gorgeousleaf rose to her paws. "You got voted the prettiest she-cat. Out of a lot of she-cats. And you won by a landslide. Even though we're all as equally pretty as you."

"That's insane!" Fernlight mewed. "That's-"

"Obnoxious." Moonfeather interrupted. "You shouldn't be mad about her winning. You guys know you're pretty."

"Yeah, but..."

**Later...**

Gorgeousleaf and Fernlight skipped by.

Bramblestar and Tigerstar, who were trying to fix Hawkfrost, or Hawkkit, looked up.

"Whaddya doin'?" Tigerstar asked curiously.

"Skipping." Fernlight mewed simply.

"Together." Gorgeousleaf added.

"But you guys aren't friends."

"We are." Fernlight mewed.

"What happened?" Tigerstar mewed.

"Long story."

"Oh. KK. Can we hear it?" Bramblestar asked.

"No."

"KK."

"Good luck with Hawkkit!" the she-cats skipped away.

"Goo-goo ga-ga." squeaked Hawkkit.

* * *

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" screamed Hawkfire. "I SHALL NOW THROW PRESENTS!"

Presents fell from the sky (and so did Hawkfire).

The cats grabbed the presents.

Cinderblaze opened her present. "A BOX OF DONUTS! THANK YOU!" she screamed. Then she ate one and squeezed the life out of Hawkfire.

Starstar pouted. "But donuts are my thing!" she cried. A box of donuts fell and hit her in the head. "YAY!" she yelled. "DONUTS!" she then hugged Cinderblaze. The two jumped up and down, cradling their boxes of donuts.

Orphankit opened her present. "Parents?" she gasped.

"YA, SWEETIE!" the mom hugged her.

"I LIKE BEING AN ORPHAN!" screamed Orphankit. "YOU ARE A PYSCHO KITTY!"

"DON'T CALL MOMMY THAT!" screamed the dad. "A TIME-OUT FOR YOU!"

"AHHH!" yelled Orphankit. "HAWKFIRE, HELP ME!"

Hawkfire changed the parents into mice.

"Better." Orphankit ate them.

Angelhalo opened her box.

A kit was in it.

And that kit looked exactly like the cat form of Gale from the Hunger Games.

"GALE!" screamed Angelhalo. "BUT I WANTED PEETA!"

Peetahottness looked over at Angelhalo from where he was kissing Katnissprettypaws under the mistletoe. "YOU CAN'T HAVE ME!" he screamed. And then he went back to kissing Katnissprettypaws.

"Fine." pouted Angelhalo. "Well, you're the second choice." she kissed Galekit.

"Awkward..."

"Here, Hawkfire, we all pooled together and got you a present!" the cats mewed. Tigerstar, Bramblestar, Firestar, and Whitestreak all helped push up a very large box.

"Ooh, wow. What could it be?" Hawkfire squealed. She opened it, and inside were...

Cats!

They leaped out of the box.

"I am Scrawnyweasel!" yowled the first cat. She was a scrawny she-cat with gray and black fur and reddish eyes.

"I am Siriusisntblackkit!" announced the second cat, a young black tom.

"HAHAHA!" yelled Harrypotterhalfblood.

"And I am Novapaw!" the next cat, a silver-and-black she-cat screamed.

"I am Darkkit!" yowled the next cat, a black she-cat with reddish stripes. "And I am currently blind!"

"One of our kind!" screamed Longtail and Jayfeather.

"I am Shiningleaf!" a pretty blue-gray she-cat purred.

"I am Icepool!" a beautiful white she-cat mewed.

"I am Swirlwhisker!" purred a cream she-cat with neon green eyes.

"I am Silverburn!" a black she-cat with gray stripes mewed.

"I am Fireflight!" a tiny russet she-cat yowled.

"I am Nightdevil!" yowled a black she-cat.

"I am Deathsinger!" mewed another black she-cat.

"I am Furstar!" a small brown she-cat with a giant mouth screamed. "I like cake and pie and everything! Everyone says I talk too much but I think I talk too little! What do you think?"

"You need to shush." Hawkfire covered her ears.

"I am Jinx!" the last cat mewed.

Suddenly, an ornament on the tree shattered. And then another one.

Jinx moved away from the tree. The ornaments stropped shattering.

"You are cursed!" screamed Fireflight. "Hey, can I have some peppermint bark?"

"Sure. There's some on the table." Hawkfire gestured to the table, where they would have their Christmas dinner.

"Kay, thanks." Fireflight mewed. She ran over to the table and stuffed her face with peppermint bark.

The other cats opened their presents.

"A dog!" cried Pitbullkit. "Wait, dogs don't like cats!" he ran away screaming.

"Hey, Moonfeather!" called Bramblestar. "Come over here! I think I have a papercut!"

"Hm..." mewed Moonfeather. She padded over. "Where is the paper cut?"

"HA!" yelled Bramblestar. "You're under the mistletoe! Now you have to kiss me!"

Moonfeather growled. Then she pulled out a cotton swab and began dabbing at Bramblestar's shoulder.

"What are you doing?" asked Bramblestar.

"Preparing to give you a shot." Moonfeather mewed.

"Okay, I'm good without a kiss." Bramblestar moved away.

* * *

**Okay, so here's the deal! I forgot to mention this last chapter BUT...**

**If your cat(s) was one of the winners, please tell me what you want their chapter to be about (I will get started on these as soon as my Christmas chapters are over). Here's what you can pick from:**

**-A day of randomness in your cats POV**

**-The cats history (If you choose this, please give me some facts about your cats history)**

**-A day where your cat is responsible for the Clans instead of Hawkfire (and if you do this, please tell me some things your cat would do as leader)**

**-Other (I can't think of ideas! So if you have another one, please tell me, and I'll see if I can do it. But if I can't, put down another one, one that I made up. Please and thank you :)...)**

**That will be all!**

**-Chucklez**


	33. The Brand New Show!

**So, here's Fernlight's chapter!**

**And it's dedicated to Fernlight, who is the creator of Fernlight! XD**

* * *

Gorgeousleaf was visiting Fernlight in her's, Moonfeather's, and Whitestreak's mansionxz.

"So, sistas, we are going to the mall!" Fernlight meowed.

"Ooh, yay!" Gorgeousleaf purred.

"This is gonna be so fun!" nodded Moonfeather.

"That's great. Have fun." Whitestreak mewed sleepily, from where he was lounging on the couch.

"Oh no. You're coming, too." Fernlight growled.

"Why?" Whitestreak snapped.

"Um, I don't know." Fernlight mewed. "Because I want you to."

"Guys, the limo's waiting!" cried Moonfeather.

"Oh... well, okay." Whitestreak grumbled.

The four cats piled into the limo.

"So, what are we gonna do at the mall?" Whitestreak asked.

Moonfeather rolled her eyes. "Shop. Duh."

"Yeah, Whitestreak, get with the program!" snapped Gorgeousleaf. "What did you think we were gonna do?"

"Wrestle alligators." Whitestreak growled sarcastically.

"You always ask the stupidest questions," growled Moonfeather.

"Thank you." Whitestreak bowed.

They pulled up at the mall, and they got out of the limo and walked inside, which had every store you could imagine.

"Ooh, let's go here!" Moonfeather pointed at a store called "Poofy Dresses that Make Your Butt Look Big".

"Oh, yes!" Fernlight squealed. She shoved Whitestreak into the store. "I triple-dog dare you to try on the fattest dress in the store!"

"NO!" yowled Whitestreak.

"Yes!" Gorgeousleaf tugged a large dress off the rack. She pushed it into Whitestreak's paws, and herded him into a changing room.

The three she-cats waited for the tom to change.

After an hour, Fernlight called in. "Have you changed yet?"

"Yes... no... MAYBE..." Whitestreak whispered.

"C'mon out then!" squealed Gorgeousleaf.

"NO!" wailed Whitestreak.

"YES!" screamed Fernlight.

"NO!"

"Yes!" growled Moonfeather. "If you don't, I will karate-chop the door down and drag you out!"

"Okay!" grumped Whitestreak. He walked out. "Does this make my butt look big?"

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!" screamed the she-cats, collapsing to the floor and rolling around, laughing.

The dress made Whitestreak's butt look ginormous.

"Okay, can I take this off now?" begged Whitestreak.

"Sure, I guess..." Fernlight mewed regretfully, wiping away tears of laughter.

"So, where to next?" asked Gorgeousleaf as Whitestreak went back into the changing room to get the ridiculous dress off.

"Um, a place... perhaps an accessory store!" Fernlight mewed.

"As long as I don't have to try on anything else!" Whitestreak mewed, sliding out of the changing room.

Fernlight winked. "I'm not promising anything."

The foursome padded out of the shop.

They then padded into Claire's.

"Oh my gosh! Whitestreak, get your ears pierced!" ordered Fernlight.

"No."

"Yes!" "Why should I?"

"Because I wanna laugh." Fernlight mewed.

"You did that when you made me put that fat dress on," growled Whitestreak.

"I wanna laugh more."

"No."

"Yes."

"NO."

"Pweeze?"

"Absolutely not."

"I beg you, Whitestreak."

Moonfeather sighed. "Whitestreak, do what your sister wants."

"Why?"

"This chapter is dedicated to her."

"What?"

"JUST DO WHAT SHE WANTS!" roared Moonfeather.

"FINE!" Whitestreak stormed up to a clerk. "PIERCE MY EARS!"

"And every other place you can possibly pierce!" purred

Fernlight. In the end, Whitestreak's face was covered in piercings.

"Okay, this is more disgusting than funny." Fernlight mewed, covering her eyes.

"Yeah." Whitestreak mewed. "And it's painful." he un-pierced himself (this is possible because he's magical).

"Dye your hair rainbow!" mewed Fernlight.

"Yes, that should be better." Gorgeousleaf nodded.

And so he did.

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!" the three she-cats began laughing like crazy again.

Then they went to Justice and dressed Whitestreak up like a girly girl.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" the she-cats continued to laugh.

"HELP ME!" Whitestreak screamed, running away. "I AM BEING ATTACKED BY THREE FREAK SHE-CATS!"

"HEY!" screamed Moonfeather.

"WE AREN'T FREAKS!" Fernlight yowled.

"Yeah, we aren't freaks. Scientists call us "undetermined", whatever that means!" Gorgeousleaf mewed.

The three other cats stared at her.

"What?" Gorgeousleaf mewed.

"I think you're the "undetermined" one." Whitestreak mewed.

Gorgeousleaf pouted.

Fernlight purred. _What a great day! This was awesome!_

**See you next time on... Torturing Whitestreak!**

* * *

**The next chapter shall be Freakishlyoldface's...**


	34. When Hawkfire Goes on Vacation

**This is when Freakishlyoldface takes over the Clans!**

**This chappie is dedicated to Goldenwing, the creator of Freakishlyoldface!**

* * *

"I'M GLAD YOU CAME!" screamed the Clans, at a Gathering.

Hawkfire came down from the sky. "I'm takin' a break from being leader!" she yowled. "So, in place of me, I pick..." she looked around and announced the first name that came to mind. "Freakishlyoldface!" she then disappeared.

"I'm the leader of the Clans! Yay!" Freaky stumbled up to the front of the crowd. "Here's the deal..." he looked around. "You, you, and you..." he mewed, pointing to Whitestreak, Fernlight, Gorgeousleaf, and Moonfeather. "You shall bake me cookies!"

"YO!" Whitestreak growled. "I'VE GOT MORE POWER THAN YOU!"

"Not today!" Freakishlyoldface sniffed. "Make me cookies!" he then nodded at the kits. "You shall make rainbow clothing, and make my dentures sparkly and rainbow-colored!" he spat out his teeth at the kits, who shrunk away.

"Ew..." Fluffykit groaned.

Weirdkit tentatively stretched out a paw and poked the dentures.

"EW!" screamed the kits, running away from Weirdkit.

"You folks can make a cream that'll make me look younger!" Freakishlyoldface looked at the medicine cats.

"I'm not sure if anything will make him look younger," whispered Willowshine.

"KittypetClan, decorate the world with rainbows. I do like rainbows."

"_No..._" Bramblestar rolled his eyes.

"Well, that's it! Get to work! Chop, chop!" Freaky mewed.

Denture cleaner then fell from the sky.

"EW!" screamed the cats. They fled.

Well, everyone but Weirdkit. He held up the dentures and got them clean. And then he walked away.

* * *

"How do you decorate the world with rainbows?" wondered Brackenfur. "I mean, you can't just go up to a rainbow and take it."

"That's what you think, young'un." Freakishlyoldface lumbered up with a jar. He waddled off to the nearest rainbow.

ThunderClan shrugged and followed.

Freakishlyoldface opened the jar and captured the rainbow.

ThunderClan applauded.

Freakishlyoldface threw jars into the crowd of ThunderClan cats. "C'mon, now, get to work!"

Purdy lumbered up. "Hello, my leader, can I entertain you with some stories about rainbows?"

"No." Freakishlyoldface grumbled. "Don't slack off. Get to rainbow catching!"

"But I'm rather old an-"

"Look, you lazy lump. I'm so old I can't count to my age. And yet I can still catch rainbows, and I can fend for myself in the world of a loner. And do everything else," Freakishlyoldface snapped. "Get to work!"

Purdy said no more and slunk away.

"Good." Freakishlyoldface purred.

* * *

The medicine cats were in Jayfeather's evil lair/ science lab.

"Hey, Jayfeather, why do you have a lab?" Mothwing asked.

"Because I want one!" Jayfeather roared.

''Touché," Mothwing grumbled.

"But you can't use it, because you're blind." Willowshine pointed out.

"I learned THAT after it was built," growled Jayfeather.

"Oh."

"Well, it's good that it was built," Kestrelflight mewed. "Now we can help Freakishlyoldface!"

"Shut it, you hippie!" growled Jayfeather. "Why would you want to help that freak of nature!"

"Says the one who was voted "Emo of the Year"!" snapped Kestrelflight.

Littlecloud blinked. "Is this racism?"

"WHO CARES!" roared Jayfeather.

"Let's just work on the cream, okay?" begged Mothwing.

"WHO'S SIDE ARE YOU ON?!" boomed Jayfeather. "THAT WAS A HIPPIE REMARK!"

"What are you talking-"

"ARE YOU THREATENING ME?!" screamed Jayfeather.

"No-"

"That's it. Call the police. Get this woman out of my sight!" Jayfeather screamed. "And while we're at it, make sure her apprentice is arrested, too."

"But I didn't do anything!" yelled Willowshine.

"I never liked you." Jayfeather growled at her.

The police came and arrested the two RiverClan cats. "Take Kestrelflight while you're at it," Jayfeather told the police. Then he giggled like a maniac. "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DEFY ME!" he screamed.

He got taken away to a mental asylum.

Littlecloud worked on the cream like nothing happened.

* * *

"I don't see why we have to take orders from that hag," Whitestreak grumbled. "I mean, he doesn't have any power!"

"Oh, shut up and mix!" snapped Gorgeousleaf, who was icing the already-made cookies. "This is actually fun!"

"Except you're a she-cat," Whitestreak snapped. "Baking should be fun for you!"

Gorgeousleaf rolled her eyes and whispered to Fernlight, "I don't like your brother," she whispered.

"Nobody does." Fernlight placed the next batch of cookies in the oven.

"I heard that!" yelled Whitestreak, flinging some of the batter at the BFFLs.

"I should hope you did!" Fernlight growled, launching her oven mitts at him. They magically slapped him in the face.

Moonfeather sighed. "Knock it off, you two." she grumbled.

"You aren't the boss of me!" Whitestreak grumped.

"But I have a syringe on me and I'm not afraid to use it." Moonfeather snapped.

"Oh. In that case, you are the boss of me." Whitestreak went back to mixing.

* * *

"So, Rainbowkit, did you get the paints?" Seriouskit mewed.

"Yes." Rainbowkit mewed innocently.

"Where are they?" asked Siriusisntblackkit.

"I dunno." A bunch of rainbow-colored paints fell on them.

"Go figure." Siriusisntblackkit grumbled.

"Well, Sparklekit, did you get the glitter?" asked Bunnykit.

"Yes."

"Where-"

Glitter fell on them.

"Oh my god." Bunnykit shook her head.

"Well, at least the dentures and clothes are done." Hippiekit mewed.

Jayfeatherkit growled. "ARE YOU A HIPPIE?!" he roared.

"YES!" Hippiekit screamed. "I'M A HIPPIE AND I'M PROUD!"

"Oh." Jayfeatherkit became quiet.

* * *

"Well, it's all done, Freakishlyoldface," Whitestreak mewed. "All of us are done."

"Good." Freaky mewed. "Kits, please give me my dentures and my clothes."

"For the rest of my life!" sang Usherkit, passing the old tom his rainbow dentures, and a rainbow tee-shirt.

Freaky pulled on the tee-shirt and popped the dentures in and smiled.

"That looks horrendous," whispered Siriusisntblackkit. "He looks horrible."

"Yeah." the kits agreed.

"So, KittypetClan, the world is decorated?"

"Yes." Brackenfur panted.

"Gorgeousleaf, hand me the cookies." Gorgeousleaf pawed him a plate of cookies.

Freaky picked one up and bit into it. "Yum!" he mewed. "Now, medicine cats, where is the cream?"

Littlecloud, who looked like he had been standing in the middle of an explosion (he probably had been), passed him a jar of cream.

Freaky dipped a claw in and applied some of the cream to his body. That part of his body instantly looked younger.

"Oh, yeah, Freaky, some side effects of the cream include itching, spasms, looking older than you are when the cream wears off, ugliness, odd food cravings, and death!" Jayfeather mewed cheerily.

Freakishlyoldface threw the cream away and frantically tried to get it off his body.

* * *

**Next up will be Whitestreak!**


	35. Whitestreak's Revenge!

**This is Whitestreak's chapter! And it's dedicated to Fernlight, the creator of Whitestreak!**

* * *

"So, kitties, we're gonna go to the casino!" Whitestreak mewed happily.

"We?" Fernlight mewed scornfully. "I hope you mean you. I'm not going to the land of freaks who think that they need to flirt with you."

"Well, they do. I'm the hottest tom alive!" Whitestreak shoved a magazine into Fernlight's face.

Fernlight looked at it and rolled her eyes. "You just used the magazine cover of Channing Tatum and pasted your picture over his, and changed "Man" to "Tom"."

"So what if I did? It's on a magazine!" Whitestreak challenged.

"I could just b-"

"LANGUAGE!" screamed Gorgeousleaf, running into the room.

Whitestreak groaned. "What's she doing here? _Again_?"

"I wasn't going to say that, silly." Fernlight purred. "I was gonna say "I could just bop you on the head with a balloon"."

"Weird..." Gorgeousleaf mewed. "But KK!"

"Again, what's she doing here?" Whitestreak grumbled.

"Um, she's now gonna live with us. Hope that's okay, brosiff."

Whitestreak got very mad. "No, it's not okay! I'm already living with two of the most annoying she-cats in the world an you throw a third into the picture? Geez, Fernlight, you spend so much time with Gorgeousleaf, why don't we just ADOPT her?"

"Good idea! Where do we adopt her?" Fernlight squealed. "And how do we?"

"NO!" wailed Whitestreak. "PLEASE NO!"

"Oh, shush." Fernlight snapped. "I won't have her join the family."

"Good." Whitestreak relaxed. "Now, to the casino!" he dragged Fernlight, Moonfeather, and Gorgeousleaf into the limo, which was waiting to take them to the casino.

* * *

Gorgeousleaf was singing at the top of her lungs.

Whitestreak flattened his ears. "Why did I take her with me?" he muttered to himself. And then he screamed at Gorgeousleaf, "HEY, GUESS WHAT?!"

"WHAT?!" yelled Gorgeousleaf.

"SCIENTISTS AREN'T CALLING YOU UNDETERMINED ANYMORE!"

"THEN WHAT AM I?!"

"PSYCHO!"

Gorgeousleaf began to cry.

Fernlight rushed over to her friend and began to comfort her. Moonfeather glared at Whitestreak. "How dare you?" she snarled.

Whitestreak snorted. "Why are you standing up for that crazy she-cat?"

"Well, she's my friend, and she's very sensitive!" Moonfeather growled.

Whitestreak sighed and watched Fernlight hand Gorgeousleaf a tissue, and Gorgeousleaf blew her nose in it.

Fernlight took it and then threw it at Whitestreak.

Whitestreak groaned. "EW!" he roared as it landed on his head. "WHAT THE HECK!" he screamed.

Fernlight tried to look surprised. "Oops, I thought you were a trash can." she mewed. "I mean, you're filled with bad things, and all."

Whitestreak growled. "That's it!" he flung himself at Fernlight.

Moonfeather stepped in between the two siblings. Whitestreak crashed into her. His sister growled and flung him off. "Knock it off," she snarled.

Whitestreak pouted. "But she started it!" he whined.

"Oh, shut up!" Moonfeather sighed.

Gorgeousleaf growled. "Yes, shut up!"

All of them were silent the rest of the way to the casino.

"Yay, let's go win some stuff!" Whitestreak jumped out of the limo and ran into the building, his sisters and Gorgeousleaf following more slowly.

When inside, Whitestreak turned around to them. "All right, girlys, let's go play poker!" he whooped.

"Okay..." Fernlight agreed.

"Sure." Gorgeousleaf shrugged.

"Absolutely not. I'm not blowing my money on something I probably won't even win." Moonfeather (she's always been the most sensible one, heehee) rolled her eyes.

"You're no fun." Whitestreak pouted. "C'mon, you two." he led Fernlight and Gorgeousleaf to a poker table and began to deal out cards.

* * *

"YAY!" Gorgeousleaf began to dance. "I WIN!"

They were on their 500th round of poker. Fernlight had won 250 matches, and Gorgeousleaf had won 250 matches. Whitestreak had won none and was now nearly broke.

"You've gotta be cheating," he whined. "I'm so calling Mom and Dad!" he pulled out his cell phone. "Hi, Dad? Yeah, it's me. I think Fernlight's cheating at poker, and so is her friend. Come to the casino and chew them out, please! Thanks. Bye!" he hung up. "So, sissies, they should be here right about-"

There was a _pop_, and their parents arrived.

"Hi, Mom!" Moonfeather mewed.

Her mom, a russet-furred she-cat, nodded. "Hello, sweetheart. What have you been doing?"

"Giving toms shots." she mewed.

Her mom glared at her. "Why? Don't tell me you're using your needle as a boy repellant. AGAIN."

"Huh?" Moonfeather mewed, flustered. "Um, no... I was giving them... flu shots! It's around this time of year when the flu comes out."

"Why just toms?" her father, who looked exactly like Whitestreak, asked.

"Oh, Hailstorm, keep out of it!" her mother snapped.

"But Scarlettleaf-"

"No ifs, no ands, no buts. Shut up!" Scarlettleaf screamed.

"Fine."

"So, why just toms?" asked Scarlettleaf.

"Um, toms and she-cats need different medicine..." Moonfeather mewed. "And I only brought the tom one..."

Scarlettleaf didn't look convinced, but moved on. "So, Whitestreak, you say your sister and her friend are cheating at poker?"

"Yes." Whitestreak glared at Fernlight and Gorgeousleaf. "It isn't possible that both of them could win 250 matches and me to win none?"

"Yes." Scarlettleaf mewed immediately. Then she sighed. "I mean, um, no..."

"Hm, Whitestreak, it is possible..." Hailstorm mewed.

"No, it isn't! They've never played poker before! They don't know how to play!"

Hailstorm glanced over at Fernlight and Gorgeousleaf, who were counting their winnings. "Well, apparently it is!"

"NO!"

"Yes."

"NO!"

"Yes."

"Nu-uh!"

"Yeah-huh!"

"NEVER!"

"WHITESTREAK!" screamed Scarlettleaf. "CALM YOURSELF!"

"Yes, mommy." Whitestreak shrunk away.

"You know, I've gotten suspicious of you three kids. So our plan is to join you in the Clans!" Scarlettleaf mewed.

All three of their kits did a slo-mo scream.

Gorgeousleaf clapped her paws. "Yay! Family bonding!" she purred.

The three other cats glared at her.

"What? I like family bonding!" Gorgeousleaf mewed.

"We don't bond. We get farther apart," growled Whitestreak.

"How is that possible?" Gorgeousleaf mewed.

"Dramatic flashback time! Yay!" Mosskit clapped her paws.

"Why is she here?" Fernlight asked. Moonfeather shrugged.

"Who knows?"

* * *

"_Let's have a family game night!" mewed Scarlettleaf. _

_"KK!" mewed Fernlight, a younger version, about five moons old. _

_"Yay!" Whitestreak squeaked, about ten moons old. _

_"Whoo-hoo!" a five-moon-old Moonfeather purred._

** Later...**

_"SHE CHEATED!" Whistreak screamed, pointing at Fernlight. _

_"DID NOT!" Fernlight growled. _

_"DID TOO!"_

_ "STOP FIGHTING!" screamed Scarlettleaf. _

_Moonfeather randomly blew up the game board._

* * *

"Whoa..." Gorgeousleaf mewed, astonished.

"Yeah..." Fernlight grimaced.

Moonfeather randomly blew up a slot machine.

* * *

**Next chapter shall be Starstar's!**


	36. Harry Potter, Twilight, and Donuts

**This is Starstar's chapter, and it is dedicated to Starstar412 who is _shockingly _the creator of Starstar! XD**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything except my cats.**

* * *

"OH MY GOD." Bramblestar mewed. "HARRY POTTER FOR LIFE!"

DA PIE ran in. "DOBBY'S DEAD!"

Bramblestar collapsed into the fatal position and began to sob. "NO!"

"For the rest of my life!" Usherkit skipped by.

"SHUT UP!" screamed Bramblestar. "CAN'T YOU SEE I'M GRIEVING?"

Peetahotness, Katnissprettypaws, Galekit, and Angelhalo ran in. "HUNGER GAMES FORVER!" they screamed.

"SHUT UP!" Edwardkit yelled. "TWILIGHT IS BETTER!"

"THEY WILL BE BETTER WHEN HARRY POTTER DIES!" screamed Bramblestar.

Squirrelflight looked up from where she was reading "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows". "HARRY'S DEAD!" she announced.

"NO!" Bramblestar gasped.

"YAY!" Jacobkit and Galekit cheered.

"Oh, wait, Dumbledore's letting him live." Squirrelflight returned to reading.

"WHOO-HOO!" Bramblestar cheered. The others pouted.

JamesPotterkit ran in. "EXPECTO PATRONUM!"

HarryPotterkit (the second one) began to boogie. "Moldywart, Moldywart!" he sang.

"YOU DARE CALL ME BY MY REAL NAME?!" roared Voldemortkit. He paused. "Oh wait, that isn't my real name."

HermioneGrangerkit sighed. "This is completely undermining the term "evil genius"."

"Thanks!" Voldemortkit mewed. "Wait, what?"

PercyJacksonkit yowled, "WHY YOU SO STUPID?!" he yelled.

"BE QUIET, SON OF POSEIDON!" Voldemortkit screamed.

"Yes, why?" RonWeasleykit mewed.

"BECAUSE I WANT TO BE!"

"Why are you yelling?" asked Galekit.

"BECAUSE I WANT TO!" screamed Voldemortkit.

Starstar and Cinderblaze ran in.

"YOU GUYS ARE ARGUING ABOUT THE WRONG THING!" Starstar yelled. "YOU SHOULD BE ARGUING ABOUT WHAT'S THE BETTER TYPE OF DONUT!"

"Why?" Jacobkit asked.

"BECAUSE I HAVE TAKEN OVER THE CLANS!"

"Oh." Edwardkit mewed.

"NOW, BOW DOWN TO ME, CHOCOLATECLAN!"

"All hail Starstar!" the cats mewed in that droning voice you hear in movies.

"So, here's the deal. You are ChocolateClan, RiverClan is VanillaClan, WindClan is GlazedClan, and ShadowClan is PowderedClan. I am the leader, Cinderblaze is my deputy. Now, SOMEBODY GET ME A BOX OF MUNCHKINS!" she screamed. "Wait, ChocolateClan, sort into two different groups. Half of you shall make donuts, and the other half shall make munchkins. I've gotta go to the other Clans and give them their orders. Make sure that the donuts taste as good as Dunkin' Donuts (this was the first donut shop name that popped into my head)!"

"Okay..." Bramblestar shrugged.

Starstar nodded. "Cinderblaze, please take charge of the donut-making here," she mewed.

"All right!" Cinderblaze nodded, and then clapped her paws. "Queens, kits, medicine cats, and elders, make the munchkins. Warriors, apprentices, Bramblestar, and Squirrelflight, make the donuts!"

"Wait, don't the donuts have to be made for the donut holes to be?" asked Bramblestar.

"DON'T QUESTION ME!" roared Cinderblaze.

"Okay..." Bramblestar grumbled, and then began making donuts.

* * *

**Later...**

"Okay, we need to go to the island. Starstar told me that she will taste the donuts, and see if she likes them," Cinderblaze mewed.

"All right." Bramblestar picked up a tray of donuts, Ferncloud picked up a tray of donut holes, and then they walked to the island.

Starstar was sitting on a throne made of donuts. The other Clans were already there. "Okay, good! GlazedClan, bring me your donuts!" Starstar grinned at the cats that made up what used to be WindClan.

Onestar brought up a tray of glazed donuts, and Ashfoot brought up a tray of glazed donut holes.

Starstar took a donut and a pawful of donut holes. She then stuffed them in her mouth. "EW!" she screamed, spitting them out. "THESE ARE DISGUSTING!" she then looked at Cinderblaze. "You know what to do."

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Cinderblaze pulled out a stick and began to chase GlazedClan around, attempting to poke them.

"PowderedClan, you're next!" Starstar mewed cheerfully.

Whimpering, Blackstar brought up the powdered donuts and Rowanclaw brought up the powdered donut holes.

Starstar tentatively licked some of the powder off a donut hole. She then spat it out. "What is this powder made from?" she gasped.

"Um, I'd rather not say..." Rowanclaw muttered.

"SECURITY!" yowled Starstar. Security cats ran in and arrested Rowanclaw and Blackstar, and the rest of ShadowClan.

"Up next, VanillaClan!" Mistystar and Reedwhisker presented the donuts.

"You know what, I'm not gonna bother tasting them." Starstar knocked the donuts away. "Go away."

RiverClan slunk away.

ChocolateClan's representatives, Bramblestar and Squirrelflight, walked up with their donuts. Starstar took a small bite of a donut. "Not Dunkin' Donuts good," she muttered, but forced the bite down her throat.

"Tim Hortons' good?" Bramblestar mewed.

"No."

"Honeydew good?"

"No."

They went on until Bramblestar had gone through every single donut shop out there.

"So what happens now?" Bramblestar whimpered.

Good-tasting donuts fell from the sky.

"Try again." Starstar growled.

The cats were then forced to work in a donut sweatshop.

* * *

**It goes back to the normal chapters now. Review and I shall give you a large box of donuts. Don't review and Voldemort will be after you...**

**Oh yeah. HAPPY NEW YEAR!**


	37. Bramblestar and Catmint

"Okay, kitties, I want you to meet two new cats!" Hawkfire mewed. She had come back. "Presenting... Whitestreak's, Fernlight's, and Moonfeather's parents, Scarletleaf and Hailstorm!"

Scarletleaf and Hailstorm walked into ThunderClan's camp.

"So..." Scarletleaf surveyed the cats. "Shouldn't you be applauding?"

The cats stared at her blankly.

"Applaud or I will bring out my angry side!" she snapped.

"And you do not want to see that," whispered Hailstorm.

The cats applauded wildly.

* * *

Bramblestar was being sane. He was normally eating a mouse.

"GASP!" gasped Peetakit (the second one). "IT'S A SANE CAT!"

"We must deal with this in the most reasonable way possible," Thornclaw mewed smartly. "We must give him Catmint!" he whipped out a bag labeled "Catmint".

"Yes!" Squirrelflight reached into the container, grabbed a pawful of leaves, and then stuffed them in a squirrel, which she carried over to Bramblestar. She tossed the mouse aside and placed the squirrel in front of him. "Eat it!" she yowled.

"Kay..." Bramblestar looked at her suspiciously, but ate it. As soon as he finished eating, his eyes lit up like when the kits get sugar highs. He began bouncing off the walls.

The cats stared at him as he began rambling about how llamas are bad for your health.

After he finished rambling, he went around kissing every single cat in the Clan. "DO YOU MIND?!" screamed Ferncloud when Bramblestar kissed her. "I HAVE A MATE, YOU KNOW!"

Bramblestar kissed her mate.

"THIS IS DISGUSTING!" roared Dustpelt. He ran away.

"KETCHUP WILL TAKE OVER THE WORLD AND WE SHALL BE FORCED TO WORK ON TACO FARMS!" Bramblestar yelled.

Everyone sighed as he began doing a one-man show about how he got his nine lives. "I'M WIDE AWAKE!" he then yelled, bowing. "I now name this Clan PyschoClan!"

The cats groaned. Bramblestar then walked into his den.

"Is he done?" asked Sorreltail.

"Um, no." Squirrelflight sighed, as Bramblestar walked back out of his den, looking like...

Effie Trinket?

"Let the Reaping begin!" he mewed dazedly. "And may the odds be ever in your favor!" he then fell off Highledge.

"Oh god, it's like the last time." Jayfeather groaned. "Again, I refuse to take care of him."

Angelhalo ran over to Bramblestar. "Wait, Effie!" she screamed, poking him. "You haven't announced the Tributes yet!"

"Well, she's in for a surprise for tonight's Gathering," muttered Jayfeather.

Angelhalo ran over. "WHAT'S THE SURPRISE?"

"Um, the Clans are gonna do their own Hunger Games..." Jayfeather grumbled.

Angelhalo fainted in happiness.

Jayfeather sighed. "I also refuse to treat to her. And plus, I was lying."

Angelhalo regained consciousness. "YOU DO NOT KID ABOUT THE HUNGER GAMES!" she attacked him.

* * *

**Later...**

"Harry Potter is the best book ever!" roared Bramblestar.

"No, Twilight is!" Blackstar mewed. Edwardkit, Jacobkit, and Bellakit and all the other Twilight kits ran over to Blackstar. "Can we join your Clan?" begged Bellakit.

"Um, Percy Jackson!" Onestar mewed.

The demigod kits ran over to him. "Let us join you!" screamed Annabethkit.

"No, the Hunger Games is the best book!" Mistystar squealed.

Peetahotness, Peetakit, Katnissprettypaws, Katnisskit, Galekit, EffieTrinketkit, Angelhalo, and all of the other Hunger Games cats ran over to Mistystar. "We're gonna join you, if you don't mind," Galekit mewed.

"Twilight is full of freaks!" HarryPotterkit growled.

"Oh, but Harry Potter is fuller of freaks!" Jacobkit hissed.

"YOU TAKE THAT BACK!" roared HarryPotterkit.

Voldemortkit took out his wand. "Avada Kedrava!" he screamed at Jacobkit.

HarryPotterkit sighed. "You brought your fake wand, stupid."

"Whoopsie." Voldemortkit grinned sheepishly.

"Again, you are undermining the term 'evil genius'." HermioneGrangerkit groaned.

"I'll take that as a compliment." Voldemortkit smiled.

"HARRY POTTER IS THE BEST BOOK EVER!" screamed Bramblestar.

Angelhalo hissed. "It'll be the best book when Peeta becomes hijacked!" she yowled.

"PEETA'S BEEN HIJACKED!" screamed Katnisskit, from where she was reading one of the Hunger Games books.

"I shouldn't have said that," grumbled Angelhalo. "And... OMG, OMG, PEETA'S GONNA DIE, I JUST KNOW IT!" she collapsed and began sobbing. "If only I was there to save him..." she mumbled.

And then the Twoleg versions of Harry Potter walked in.

"YAY!" Bramblestar cheered. "STARCLAN HAS SENT A SIGN! HARRY POTTER IS THE BEST!"

ThunderClan and the characters partied while the others sulked in a corner.

* * *

**I need ideas for this story! Send in suggestions, please!**


	38. Scary Stories and Catmint (AGAIN)

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Cloudystrom123: Geez! I totally forgot! I got wrapped up in the excitement of the holidays. I'll do Whinykit's chapter as soon as you tell me what you want it to be (find the suggestions on what to do on chapter 32. Again, sorry if you did do this, but I can't find anything...). I'm very sorry. *Holds up a plate of brownies*. Will you please forgive me?**

**Now, on with the chapter!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Warriors, One Direction, Usher, Pitbull, the Hunger Games, or anything else you've seen before. I only own my cats and the Crazy Pills.**

* * *

"KittypetClan, we have been caught in a storm! To the cave I call my den!" yelled Bramblestar.

"KK!" the cats agreed. They stampeded into Bramblestar's den.

"So..." Daisy mewed, when they had all crammed inside. "What are we going to do right now?"

"Wait for the storm to pass." Bramblestar mewed simply.

"Um, okay..." Ferncloud mewed. "But the kits will get bored."

"Their problem, not mine."

And then the power went out.

"AHHHHH!" screamed the cats.

Brackenfur looked confused. "Wait, since when did we have electricity?"

"Since forever." Bramblestar mewed.

"No..."

"Okay, since yesterday." Bramblestar mewed.

"That makes sense."

"Ooh! Let's tell ghost stories!" Fernlight squealed.

"YES!" Gorgeousleaf and Moonfeather purred.

"Okay then," Bramblestar agreed. "Who wants to go first?"

"Ooh, ooh! I do!" Angelhalo mewed. "I have a great one! It's about Peeta being hijacked by the Capitol."

"No!" grumbled the cats. "We've heard the story already!"

"You have?" Angelhalo looked surprised. "

Yeah." everyone mewed. "Did I tell you about the time when-"

"Yes."

"Did I tell you about the part where-"

"Yes." "Did I tell you about the-"

"YES!" Bramblestar screamed. "YES, YES, YES! NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"I've got a great one," Purdy rumbled. "It's about the time I let a mouse escape from me when I was hunting. Y'know, when I was still a loner."

"NOT PURDY'S STORIES!" screamed Fireflight wailed. "THE WORLD'S GONNA END IF HE TELLS US A STORY!"

The cats screamed in terror.

"I'll tell a story then!" Furstar squeaked. "But fair warning, it's really long..."

"NOT FURSTAR'S STORIES!" screamed Novapaw. "THEY NEVER END!"

"_I'll_ tell a story, then." Gorgeousleaf mewed.

"Yeah, sure," the cats agreed. "Gorgeousleaf usually has pretty good stories..."

"Okay, I shall tell you about the time when I went to the cosmetics store, and there was no lip gloss."

"GASP!" everyone gasped.

Cloudfeather rested her tail on Gorgeousleaf's shoulder. "That must've been awful!"

"Let me tell the story!" Gorgeousleaf snapped. "Anyways, I went to the mall, because I needed to go to the cosmetics store to buy some more lip gloss, because I was out."

"GASP!" everyone gasped.

Swiftstorm wiped away a tear. "You didn't have lip gloss?" she gasped. "How did you ever survive?"

"I don't know," Gorgeousleaf mewed solemnly. "I just don't know."

"Please, continue." Bramblestar motioned for her to go on.

"And when I got into the store, I rushed straight to the lip gloss section. And there was none there. I asked a salescat, and he said there was no more lip gloss left."

"DUN DUN DUN" Epickit mewed.

Gorgeousleaf dipped her head. "Thank you for the sound effects."

The den burst with reactions and questions.

"OH NO!"

"That must have been terrible!"

"Why must such a thing happen? That's tragic!"

"What was that store? I will never go there!"

"This is why I do my shopping at CVS."

"Did you die?"

"Thank you for your concern, yes, yes it was, I don't remember, but it definitely is, good for you, and yes, I did die." Gorgeousleaf mewed.

"OH NO!" the cats wailed.

"But I came back." Gorgeousleaf purred.

"YAY!" the cats cheered.

**In Conclusion, that was a FAIL.**

* * *

"WHEE!" Squirrelflight yelled, skipping by. "WE SHALL ALL DIE!"

The cats had taken Catmint.

"KK!" Foxleap giggled.

The Catmint had taken over the whole Clan.

"I'M SEXY AND I KNOW IT!" screamed Foreveraloneforver.

"Yes you are!" giggled Cloudfeather. "Will you be my mate?"

"NO!" screamed Foreveraloneforever. "I WANT TAWNYPELT!"

Rowanclaw ran in. "YOU SHALL NEVER HAVE MY MATE!"

The Catmint had taken over the Clans. All of 'em.

"Shush, you ragamuffin!" Foreveraloneforever yelled.

"What's a ragamuffin?" asked Stupidkit.

"A type of cheese." Brackenfur mewed wisely.

"Oh." Stupidkit nodded.

"WHICH CAME FIRST, JAYFEATHER?!" roared Lionblaze. "THE CHICKEN, OR THE EGG?!"

"THE BANANA!" Jayfeather screamed.

"HEY... MACERANA!" screamed Bluestar.

It has also taken over StarClan.

"DON'T STOP THE PARTY!" sang Usherkit.

"FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!" sang Pitbullkit.

"Is this Opposite Day?" asked Thornclaw.

"No." Usherkit cocked his head. "Why?"

"Um, well... you two are singing songs that aren't from you."

"So?"

"CHEESE!" screamed DA PIE (wow, he hasn't been in for a while...).

"I AM VERY SEXY!" Foreveraloneforever declared.

"GANGNAM STYLE!"

"OMG OMG OMG!" screamed Poppyfrost. "LOUIS FROM ONE DIRECTION IS GETTING MARRIED!"

"How do you know?" asked Hawkfire, acting falsely interested.

"IT SAYS IN THIS MAGAZINE!" squealed Cinderheart.

Hawkfire zapped the magazine with lightning. "DIE!" she screamed. "THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!"

"Isn't it?" agreed Blossomfall. "I was going to marry him! Now, Louie's getting married to some other person!"

"_Louie_?" Hawkfire stared at her in disbelief. "Isn't it Louis?"

"HIS NAME IS LOUIE!" roared Blossomfall. Then she began to sob. "All hope is lost... I can no longer marry my dream boy..."

"I thought you were planning on marrying Josh Hutcherson." mewed Fernlight.

Blossomfall sighed. "Fernlight, the Hunger Games was out about a year ago. Nobody cares about him anymore."

"HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT ABOUT PEETA'S PORTRAYER!" screamed Angelhalo, attacking Blossomfall. "JOSH HUTCHERSON IS HOT. HE IS PEETA!"

As you can tell, Angelhalo is in love with the Hunger Games.

"TIGERS FOR ALL!" screamed Bramblestar.

"May the odds _never_ be in your favor!" Squirrelflight mewed dazedly. She then fainted.

"I NEED A DOCTOR!" roared Lionblaze, fainting.

"I AM A DOCTOR, BUT I SHALL NOT HELP YOU!" Jayfeather screamed. He also fainted.

"This tom is on fire!" Firestar ran in, on fire. Then he fainted.

The cats rolled him around in the dirt to put out the fire.

And then Russetfur fell from the edge of StarClan. "POTATOES!" she roared, and then fainted.

"Awkward..." Moonfeather mewed. She was the only one who had not taken Catmint.

How smart of her.


	39. Double Rainbows and Unicorns!

**Well, here's a long-overdue chapter for Whinykit! It's dedicated to Cloudystorm123, and again, I'm very sorry for forgetting...**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Warriors. But I own all of my ideas and the kits and things you haven't seen before this story. **

* * *

"All right, cats!" Hawkfire yelled. "We're going to have a wrestling tournament! Whinykit will be the host/referee. Sign up if you want to!"

A lot of cats stampeded over to the sign-up sheet.

And then they were poofed to a wrestling arena.

"Okay, so first round matches shall be... Lionblaze and Orphankit, Mayorstar and Gorgeousleaf, Rowanclaw and Blackstar, Peetakit and Galekit, HarryPotterkit and RonWeasleykit, Jacobkit and Edwardkit, Bramblestar and Tawnypelt, Mistystar and Onestar, DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR and Russetfur and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah... let's get this thing started!" whooped Whinykit, the announcer. "Come on out, Lionblaze and Orphankit!"

Lionblaze took one look at Orphankit, screamed, and ran away.

"Well, Orphankit is advancing to the next round!" Whinykit purred. "Now, for Mayorstar and Gorgeousleaf!"

Mayorstar, who had become hypnotized by Gorgeousleaf's beauty, had become convinced that she must win the tournament, so he just walked away.

"Well then..." Whinykit mewed, surprised.

And the wrestling matches went on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and cheese and on and on and on and on and on and tacos and on...

"And so, proceeding to the next round shall be Orphankit, Gorgeousleaf, Rowanclaw, Peetakit, HarryPotterkit, Jacobkit, even though Edwardkit won Edwardkit's too sparkly to move on, Tawnypelt, Mistystar, DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR, and blah blah blah..." Whinykit listed the names. "So now, the matches will be Orphankit and Gorgeousleaf, Rowanclaw and Jacobkit, Peetakit and HarryPotterkit, and we shall have a three-way wrestling match between Tawnypelt, Mistystar, and DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR!" "Place yo bets here!" roared Tigerstar. "Bet on the winner!"

"I'm betting on Gorgeousleaf!" Bramblestar mewed dreamily. "I'm betting on DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR." Blackstar mewed.

Russetfur growled.

"I'm betting on HarryPotterkit!" squealed Voldemortkit.

"I'm betting on Orphankit!" announced Dumbheart.

"Popsicles! Get yer popsicles here!" yowled Dustpelt.

Everyone stampeded to him and stole the popsicles.

"NUM NUMS!" everyone screamed, and ate their popsicles.

What they didn't know was that they had eaten cherry popsicles.

"Hi, Mousefur!" Purdy walked by.

Mousefur looked at him confused. "Hello, m'am."

"M'am?" Purdy cocked his head. "I'm a tom. Purdy, remember?"

"But... you have lipstick on."

"Huh?"

"Yeah... it looks like you have lipstick on."

"CURSE THOSE CHERRY POPSICLES!"

"Well, let the fights begin!" purred Whinykit.

"I bet I can beat you." growled Gorgeousleaf. "You're only a kit, so I'll take it easy on you."

"Kay!" Orphankit smiled sweetly. She then lunged at Gorgeousleaf.

Gorgeousleaf lunged at her, and then poked Orphankit.

The kit stared. "What the..."

"That was a push." Gorgeousleaf mewed simply. "Now fall down!"

"I'm good." Orphankit mewed.

"REFEREE!" Gorgeousleaf screamed. "ORPHANKIT'S CHEATING! SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO FALL DOWN BUT SHE DIDN'T!"

Whinykit, who was not only the announcer but the referee, hurried over. "That's not cheating. She doesn't have to fall down if she doesn't want to."

"NOT FAIR!" Gorgeousleaf threw an "Angelhalo". She jumped up and down.

"You're worse than me when I throw a fit." Whinykit mewed disgustedly. "And that's saying something. I'm going to pull you from the arena for bad sportsmanship."

"WHAA!" Gorgeousleaf stomped out of the arena.

In the end, it was Orphankit, Jacobkit, HarryPotterkit, and DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR in the semi-finals. "So, the matches shall be Orphankit and Jacobkit and HarryPotterkit and DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR!" announced Whinykit. "Let the battles begin!"

"Jacobkit, guess what?" Orphankit mewed.

"What?" "Edward gets Bella."

"NO!" Jacobkit fainted.

Orphankit picked him up by the scruff and flung him out of the arena.

"Now, for HarryPotterkit and DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR!"

"We're going to re-enact a part from "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part Two"." HarryPotterkit mewed. "I shall be Harry, and DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR shall be Voldemort."

"Expelliarmus!" HarryPotterkit disarmed "Voldemort".

"YES!" he struck a dramatic pose. "I have become the Master of Death!"

"Voldemort" died (DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR simply collapsed to the ground and pretended to be dead).

HarryPotterkit rolled her out of the arena. "I WIN!"

"You tricked me!" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR sobbed.

"So?" HarryPotterkit squeaked.

"I don't know."

"Well, now, it's time for the final match! Orphankit and HarryPotterkit!" Whinykit mewed.

"EXPELLIARMUS!" HarryPotterkit yelled.

Orphankit sighed. "I don't have a wand, stupid."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"So..."

"Are you two gonna fight or not?" Whinykit hissed indignantly.

"Yes." Orphankit mewed.

"No." HarryPotterkit mewed.

"Then Whinykit wins."

"YAY!" the crowd cheered.

"Losers, pay up!" roared Dumbheart.

"He did something smart for once!" gasped Mayorstar. "He betted on the winner!"

So they paid up.

And then Orphankit was given her winnings. She received a large, heavy medal that she couldn't wear because her head would sag, a giant trophy filled with cornflakes, a box of cherry popsicles, and candy.

"YES!" screamed Orphankit. "I HAVE WON!" she struck a dramatic pose. "YAY!"

Then there were double rainbows shooting across the sky, and unicorns riding them. Confetti and cookies fell from the air, and everyone partied.


	40. All Sanity is Lost!

**I don't own Warriors, Rock Cycle Rap (don't ask, but yes, this is a real video on Youtube that I had the misfortune of watching yesterday), the Hunger Games, or anything else you've seen before this story.**

**StoryWizard288: I understand that you sent in a cat. I know you want him in badly, but you have to be patient. I have an idea to introduce him, but I'm not ready to do it yet. But, I can promise you, along with every other person who has submitted a cat and has not yet seen them in this story, they will be in the story within the next five chapters.**

* * *

"ALL SANITY IS LOST!" wailed Bramblestar.

Lionblaze was running around in circles. "I CAN NO LONGER FUNCTION IN SOCIETY!"

Squirrelflight walked over. "What did you guys do?"

"Um, we went on Youtube..." muttered Bramblestar.

"What did you watch?"

"Something."

"Tell me."

"Just watch it!" Bramblestar shoved his laptop in Squirrelflight's face.

"Fine, I will."

**Three Minutes Later...**

"OHMYGOD WHAT DID I JUST WATCH?!" wailed Squirrelflight.

Leafpool came over. "What the... Squirrelflight, what _did_ you watch?"

"THIS!" Squirrelflight pointed at the laptop, crying.

"Rock Cycle Rap?" Leafpool read the screen.

"IT WAS HORRIBLE!" wailed Squirrelflight.

"Let me listen to it myself." Leafpool extended a claw, about to press play, when Lionblaze bowled her over. "NO!" he screamed. "SAVE YOURSELF!"

"Fine." Leafpool walked away.

"Whew. She saved herself."

And then Leafpool ran back. "I WATCHED THE VIDEO!" she screamed. "I COULDN'T HELP IT!"

"It's awful, right?" Squirrelflight wiped away a tear.

"IT'S EDUCATIONAL!" screamed Leafpool. "ALL SANITY IS LOST!"

"I said that!" sobbed Bramblestar.

Whitestreak, Fernlight, Moonfeather, Scarletleaf, Hailstorm, and Gorgeousleaf walked in.

"What the..." Moonfeather stared at the four pyscho kitties.

"I WATCHED AN EDUCATIONAL VIDEO!" wailed Lionblaze.

"NO SCREAMING!" screamed Scarletleaf.

And then Lionblaze was purple. Seriously. Scarletleaf had turned him purple!

"CHANGE ME BACK!" he wailed. "I'M SORRY FOR SCREAMING!"

"YOU'RE STILL SCREAMING!" screamed Scarletleaf. She changed his fur to barf-colored.

"Sorry." Lionblaze whispered.

"Now you're whispering! I DON'T LIKE WHISPERING!" Scarletleaf changed him to swamp green-colored.

Lionblaze's voice changed to normal. "Can you please change me back to normal?"

"Sure." Scarletleaf changed him back to golden.

"Yay!" Lionblaze skipped away.

* * *

"So, my kits, you two are old enough to have mates. You two must keep the family tree going. So, we're going to find you mates!" Scarletleaf purred.

Fernlight groaned. "Why?"

"And why isn't Whitestreak here?" Moonfeather growled.

"Because we already tried giving him a mate. It didn't work out, he's too powerful. But you two aren't."

"Oh no..." Fernlight sighed.

"ALL CATS WHO THINK THEY ARE WORTHY OF DATING MY DAUGHTERS, COME SIT YOUR BUTTS DOWN UNDER TACOLEDGE!" yowled Hailstorm. He had taken over Bramblestar's den, while he was losing sanity.

All the toms in the Clans and Tribe, and rogues, and loners, stampeded over to sit under Highledge to attempt to win over Fernlight's and Moonfeather's hearts.

"All of them stink." Moonfeather growled. "I'm out of here." she stormed off, but then Hailstorm leaped in front of her. "No. You're staying."

"I have a syringe and I'm not afraid to use it."

"Good-bye."

"Fernlight, you're the cat we shall find a mate!" Scarletleaf mewed. Fernlight randomly jumped off of Highledge and flew away.

"Well, then..."

* * *

"OMG OMG OMG!" squealed Cinderheart. "I'M SO HAPPY!"

"What?" Gorgeousleaf asked.

"HARRY STYLES AND TAYLOR SWIFT BROKE UP!"

"YAY! I NEVER LIKED HAYLOR!" screamed Gorgeousleaf.

Fernlight snorted. "I can't imagine what the song Taylor will write about Harry."

"Well, we can be assured that I will kill her if she dares insult him!" Cinderheart growled. "I HEART HARRY STYLES!"

"Okay..."

"We're married, y'know..." Cinderheart mewed dreamily.

"What?"

"Harry and I are married. But it's so secret he doesn't even know about it!"

"But Lionblaze does."

"Oh no."

"YOU'RE CHEATING ON ME, CINDERHEART?!" roared Lionblaze.

"Yes! No! I mean, HAPPY HUNGER GAMES!" Cinderheart ran away, Lionblaze chasing after her.

"Awkward..."


	41. Stupidkit's Purchases

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Moonbeam141: Russetfur! Boo-ya! Nailed it! LOL**

**ON WITH ZE CHAPTER!**

* * *

"LET'S GO TO THE MALL!" screamed Bramblestar.

"YAY! THE MALL!" the cats screamed.

"TO THE LIMO!"

"YAY! THE LIMO!" the cats stampeded to the limo to find that everyone else was already in there.

"But this is supposed to be ThunderClan's limo!" whined Angelhalo.

"Too bad!" Shadowheart snapped.

"TO THE MALL, JAMES!" screamed Blackstar.

Guess who was the driver? That's right, Rowanclaw. "But I don't want to!" whined Rowanclaw. "Can't somebody else drive?"

"You stink at being a chauffeur." Blackstar pouted.

"For the last time, I'm not a chaffeur!"

"Yeah, Blackstar." CaptainObviouskit mewed. "He's Rowanclaw!"

"THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE!" sang Mousefur, Purdy, and a chorus made up of elders.

"CATMINT!" screamed NumNumkit.

"CATMINT!" echoed the cats.

"CATMINT!" chorused the chorus.

"Whoa..."

And then they arrived at the mall.

Rowanclaw pushed the "eject" button, and the cats flew out of the limo and crash-landed in the food court.

"Free samples!" yelled a cat.

The cats stampeded over to the cat.

"Is it catmint?" Toadstep asked.

"No... it's fried rice."

"FRIED RICE!" screamed NumNumkit.

"FRIED RICE!" echoed the cats.

"CATMINT!" chorused the chorus.

"Catch up, you geezers!" growled Weirdkit. And then they raided the tray that contained the free samples of fried rice.

"Ooh, remember when we went to the store that contained those big, poofy dresses that made Whitestreak's butt look big?" asked Fernlight.

"Yes!" squealed Gorgeousleaf.

"Well, let's do it again!" Fernlight grabbed Whitestreak and dragged him away, followed by Gorgeousleaf, Moonfeather, and Scarletleaf, who was dragging Hailstorm.

"I AM GOING TO THE ALL THINGS HUNGER GAMES STORE!" squealed Angelhalo, grabbing Galekit's paw and running away, followed by the Hunger Games cats.

"THEN LET'S GO TO THE ALL THINGS HARRY POTTER STORE!" yowled HarryPotterkit.

"I'm gonna go to the All Things Twilight store!" announced Jacobkit.

"Oh, they don't have one of those. Twilight stinks." Anti-Twlightkit mewed.

"NO!"

"We'll meet up here later." Bramblestar mewed, and they all went their separate ways.

The kits ran off to Target.

"So... what are we doing now?" asked Sugarkit.

"This!" CocoaPuffkit mewed, running into a clothing rack and hiding behind the clothes.

A cat wandered by, and began shuffling through the rack of clothing.

"Pick me!" mewed CocoaPuffkit.

"AHHH!" screamed the cat. "THE CLOTHING JUST TALKED TO ME!" she ran away.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" CocoaPuffkit fell out of the clothing rack laughing.

An hour later, they all came back with purchases.

Stupidkit had five extremely large bags.

"What did you buy?" asked Hazeltail curiously.

"I just bought some cats..." Stupidkit mewed lamely.

"What?"

"Yeah... do you want to meet them?"

"Sure..." So Stupidkit reached into the bags. "This is Copppercreek and Tenderfoot, they're twins and littermates with Fireflight, they like to play the cymbals... this is Tei-Tei the Yandere, she's a very vicious she-cat... this is Furryfur-is-furrykit, he likes eating skittles and throwing them at people... this is Tiggerstar, he likes eating animal crackers and bouncing on his tail all Tigger-like... this is Darkfur, he wants to teleport... this is Yellowsnow, he's extremely stupid... this is Television, who is very random... Kitkit, who wants to be a kit forever... this is Jewelstorm, who is very hyper and often gets in trouble... Sootrose, who is a good pranker and wants to be mates with Tigerheart... Fireleaf, who can fly... DA DESU POTTER, who is very Harry Potter-y... Indianakit, who I don't know much about... Roseheart, who loves random things... and these lovely ladies are Bigkit, who has a big butt but is still pretty and Peppercloud, who cheats on toms as a hobby..."

The toms drooled. Their mates slapped them.

"WHERE ARE MAH CYMBALS!?" screamed Coppercreek.

"FIREFLIGHT, D'YOU WANNA BE IN OUR BAND?!" yelled Tenderfoot.

"NO!" screamed Fireflight. "NO! YOU'VE ASKED ME THIS!" she ran away screaming.

"I AM MORE VICIOUS THAN SHADOWHEART!" announced Tei-Tei.

"WHAAAAAT?" gasped Shadowheart. "NOBODY IS MORE VICIOUS THAN ME!"

"NUM NUMS!" screamed Furryfur-is-furrykit. He popped a pawful of Skittles in his mouth and then throw a pawful at the other cats.

"WHEE!" Tiggerstar began hopping around on his tail.

"I shall now teleport into the crowd!" Darkfur announced. He swiftly moved into the crowd of cats. "Ta-da!"

Yellowsnow was drooling in a stupid way. "Duh..."

"TACOS! CHEESE PUFFS!" NYAN CATS!" Jewelstorm yowled.

"TIGERHEART YOU ARE SO HANDSOME BE MAH MATE RIGHT NOW!" Sootrose screamed

Tigerheart slowly backed away. "I'm outta here..." he ran away.

"Hello, fellow Potterheads!" DA DESU POTTER immediately hit it off with the Harry Potter cats.

"I need to find out who I am!" declared Indianakit.

Epickit and Randomkit walked over to Roseheart. "Hiya!" Epickit mewed cheerily.

"OHMYGOD YOU'RE EPICKIT!" Roseheart hugged him. "AND YOU'RE RANDOMKIT!" Roseheart hugged him, too.

The toms continued to drool over Bigkit and Peppercloud.

"To the catmint stand!" hollered Bramblestar.

"Catmint!" NumNumkit sang.

"Catmint!" echoed the cats.

"Fried rice!" chorused the chorus.

"CATCH ON ALREADY!" screamed Crazykit.

"Duh..." Yellowsnow meowed stupidly.

* * *

**Well, I think that worked out well.**

**Let me know if I missed your cat!**


	42. Torturing Whitestreak! Again!

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Trev12354: Um... sorry, but Darkfur can't have any powers unless you answer the question. But the question is... Who is Russetfur's father? I'll give Darkfur the powers if you answer the question, but I can't just do it without the answer. All the other people had to answer the question if they wanted their cat to be powerful. Sorry if you answered some other time, but I didn't recieve (or see) it.**

**Raven: I didn't recieve anything for a cat named Perfectstar... unless I just can't find the review... would you mind sending the form in again? I will put her in when I get it. :)**

**Now, let's torture Whitestreak some more! MWA HAHAHA...**

**Oh right. I also don't own Warriors.**

* * *

"POOL PARTY IN THE MIDDLE OF WINTER!" screamed Goldenwing.

"YAY!" cheered the cats as Goldenwing led them to her house- which had a very large pool.

"LET'S BOOGIE!" yelled Sugarkit, turning on a boom box and very loud music began pumping through the speakers.

"I shall barbecue!" announced Goldenwing. "Hot dogs, hamburgers, or cheeseburgers?"

"TACOS!" screamed Crazykit.

"Choose between hot dogs, hamburgers, or cheeseburgers!" growled Goldenwing.

"Let's see..." Waiterkit mewed. "Just cook fifty million hot dogs, fifty thousand hamburgers, and five hundred cheeseburgers!"

"KK!" Goldenwing slapped patties and hot dogs onto a ginormous grill and began to cook them.

"EVERYONE INTO THE POOL!" ordered Bossykit.

"HALLELUJAH!" screamed the cats, jumping in.

Later, when they'd gotten out of the pool and Goldenwing had served up dinner, she announced, "Makeover time!"

"We're outta here!" the toms yelled, getting up.

"NO!" roared Goldenwing. "You're staying!"

"WHAA!"

"Okay, Whitestreak first!" Goldenwing purred.

"Pooey." Whitestreak pouted, but then sat down in a beauty salon chair that was randomly placed on the deck. There was also a mirror and a table piled high with makeup.

"Okay, first... FUR SHINER!" screamed Gorgeousleaf. Suddenly, like weapons, the she-cats pulled out cans labeled "Glitter" and set to work. When they were done, Whitestreak was very sparkly.

"MANI-PEDI TIME!" Gorgeousleaf squealed. The she-cats whipped out containers of claw polish.

"PINK!" squealed Fernlight, and began painting Whitestreak's claws.

Eyeliner... mascara... lipstick... curlers... dresses... high heels...

"ATTENTION, EVERYONE!" screamed Goldenwing. "MAY I PRESENT TO YOU THE NEWLY IMPROVED WHITESTREAK!"

A runway magically appeared, and Whitestreak walked out with a dress that made his butt look big, ridiculously high heels, and an extreme amount of makeup on. Oh yeah, and his fur was curly. Whitestreak struck a pose. "Does this make me look sexy?" he asked, in a girly voice.

All the toms began to laugh extremely hard. But they stopped laughing when it was their turn for makeovers.

Yellowsnow was putting lipstick on his hot dog. "Duhhh..." he mewed.

* * *

"THE CATMINT STAND IS NOW OPEN!" announced Lionblaze.

"CATMINT!" screamed NumNumkit. "CATMINT!" echoed the cats.

"CATMINT!" chorused the chorus.

"NOT THIS AGAIN!" wailed Normalkit.

The cats stampeded to Lionblaze's Catmint Stand and ate it all.

"NUM NUMS!" sang Cinderblaze.

"INTERRUPTING COW!" screamed Cinderxlion00isawesome.

"BACON COMES FROM A COW FOOT!" announced Jayfeather.

Fernlight rolled her eyes. "What a brilliant deduction."

"TACOS!" sang NumNumkit.

"TACOS!" echoed the cats.

"CA-" the chorus started.

"NO!" Weirdkit screamed. "DON'T YOU DARE!"

"I have an announcement! I am going to marry Ketchup Chips!" announced Randomkit.

Roseheart pouted. "But I was going to marry you!"

"Go marry Epickit."

"KKZ! EPICKIT, BE MY HUSBAND RIGHT NOW!"

Suddenly, another pretty cat walked in, causing all the toms to stare. "Hello, I'm Wolffur!" the she-cat purred.

"BE MY MATE!" screamed Epickit, who was running away from Roseheart. He jumped onto Wolffur. "Save me from the crazy lady!" he whispered to her.

"Kay... Epickit is my husband!" announced Wolffur.

"NO!" Roseheart collapsed into the fatal position and began sobbing. "LIFE IS RUINED!"

"Relax!" Randomkit patted her on the back. "Ketchup Chips aren't alive. There's no way I can marry them!"

And then Ketchup Chips bounced into camp. "We're alive!"

"MARRY ME!" screamed Randomkit, kissing the chips.

"NO!" Roseheart cried.

"BE IN OUR BAND, FIREFLIGHT!" screamed Coppercreek.

"NO! I PLAY THE CLARINET FOR PLEASURE, NOT TO ENTERTAIN OTHER PEOPLE!" growled Fireflight, running away.


	43. Weddings, Kits, and Thrift Shop

**Reply to Reviews:**

**PSYkit: You're named after the person who sang "Gangham Style"**

**Roseheart4271: YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST REVIEW AND ASK FOR YOUR CHARACTER TO BE HOOKED UP WITH THE HIGHEST RANK MALE IN THIS STORY?! Well, you can! Enjoy the wedding! **

**PS. Fernlight, sorry if you don't like this. Please say something if you want it changed...**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Troublemaker, Hunger Games, Warriors, or Thrift Shop**

* * *

"LINE UP IF YOU WANT A PONY!" screamed Hawkfire.

All the cats immediately lined up.

"I shall give a few cats ponies!" announced Hawkfire. Then she began going down the line. "Hawkfrost, you get one because I like you a real lot, Goldenwing, since your birthday was sometime around this day, you get a pony, plus you're my friend, so..." she went on. "Fernlight, Whitestreak, and Moonfeather, you get ponies, you three are my BFFs, Shadowheart and Tei-Tei get them too because they scare me, Fireflight gets one..." she went on. "Cloudtail, you don't get one, you're too fat... Coppercreek and Tenderfoot, you don't get them because you bug Fireflight too much... Bluestar, you don't get one 'cuz you're psycho... Thunderstar, you don't get one because you were born... Tigerstar, Thistleclaw, Brokenstar, Ashfur, Millie, you guys don't get any because I don't like you cats... Ferncloud, you have too many kits, you can't possibly have a pony as well..."

The cats who got ponies rode away into the sunset.

The others slumped to the ground and sobbed.

Well, except for Yellowsnow. He was poking a stick with a beetle (and yes, I said it right), smiling like nothing had happened.

* * *

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" screamed Slowkit.

"CATCH UP ALREADY!" yowled Quickkit. "YOU'RE SO SLOW!"

"I have an announcement, so listen up!" screamed Roseheart. "I NO LONGER LOVE EPICKIT OR RANDOMKIT! WHITESTREAK IS VERY HOT, SO HE IS GONNA BE MAH MATE!"

"Awkward..." muttered the cats.

Hailstorm looked at Whitestreak. "Do you know about this?"

"Ya..." Whitestreak mewed dreamily.

"Whoa..."

"LET THERE BE CAKE!" screamed Sugarkit.

"NO, LET THERE BE A WEDDING!"

"This is strange..."

And then Hawkfire appeared, clapped her paws, and they were then poofed to a church.

"Not another wedding!" groaned Negativekit.

"Yay! Another wedding!" sighed Positivekit.

The cats looked at the wedding party, which was walking down the aisle. The groomsmen were Bramblestar, Onestar, Foxstar, Chucklez-Lives-On, DA PIE, and DA EPIC ONE. The best man was Trollface. The bridesmaids were Fernlight, Moonfeather, Mousefur, and three very unhappy she-cats in dresses named Hawkfire, Tei-Tei the Yandre, and Shadowheart. The Maid of Honor was Jewelstorm. The flower toms (yes, toms) were Epickit, Randomkit, and Yellowsnow. The ring bearer was Sugarkit. It was normal music when they went down the aisle and took their places.

And then an announcer began to speak. "The bride is coming! Please stand for the pledge of allegiance!" And then the normal wedding music changed to Olly Murs new song, "Troublemaker", and disco lights came on. Roseheart came in, riding her new pony named Whitestreak the Second. She then hopped off the pony and ran down the aisle, singing. And then it became silent.

Then the minister came out.

It was Purdy.

Of course.

The old hag began rambling about things that were totally unrelated to the wedding. So after a week, five hours, thirty-two minutes, and seventeen seconds, Purdy asked for the rings and announced that Roseheart and Whitestreak were married.

"YAY!" squealed Roseheart and she and Whitestreak kissed.

The cats in the pews covered the kits' eyes.

"PARTY!" screamed Discokit.

The lights came back on and everyone began dancing.

Scarletleaf walked up to her two daughters. "So, Whitestreak's married. It's time for you two to get mates!"

"ALL THE SINGLE LADIES!" screamed Fernlight and Moonfeather, running away.

And then "Thrift Shop" came on.

"HIDE THE KITS!" screamed Ferncloud, shoving them into a bush.

"Why are there bushes in the church?" wondered Brackenfur.

"CROWFEATHER, DANCE WITH ME!" screamed Black Widow.

"TIGERHEART, DANCE WITH ME!" screamed Sootrose.

Desperate, Tigerheart and Crowfeather began dancing with each other. "WE'VE ALREADY GOT DANCE PARTNERS!" they yelled.

The two she-cats stared at the two toms, who then ran away.

And then Peetakit brought out a ginormous cake that said "Happy Hunger Games!". Whitestreak and Roseheart stared. "Oops, this was for Angelhalo." Peetakit mewed sheepishly. "This is the right one!" he ran back and grabbed the right cake. It was an eighty-foot high cake and it had eighty different flavors. It had miniature figures of Whitestreak and Roseheart on top of it.

"CAKE!" screamed NumNumkit.

"CAKE!" echoed the cats.

"CAKE!" chorused the chorus.

Everyone dug into the cake and quickly devoured it all.

"But I didn't get a piece of cake!" whined Whinykit. She then threw an "Angelhalo".

"LET US RIDE OFF INTO THE SUNSET!" screamed Roseheart. The newlyweds jumped on Whitestreak the Second's back and they rode off into the sunset.

They got terribly burned, so they rode off into the moonrise... or something like that...


	44. 500 REVIEWS!

**Wow... over 500 reviews! *Faints from happiness, but revives cuz all of you are expecting me to write a story here* LOL**

**Please don't keep asking for your OCs to be put in. I know they are there, and they will be put in when I can. I've got a really big list of OCs to go through.**

**Happy MLK Day!**

* * *

"TODAY IS MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. DAY!" screamed Hawkfire. "SO GO HONOR HIM!"

"What? Who's that?" asked Bramblestar.

"HISTORY LESSON!" she screamed, and poofed them all to a classroom, and had Freakishlyoldface teach them about Martin Luther King Jr, because Freaky knew him, and was alive when he was (You know that cats only live for ten to twenty years, so..).

And then, after he dismissed the class, he made denture cleaner rain from the sky.

"EW!" screamed the cats, running away.

* * *

"MOVIE NIGHT!" screamed Bramblestar. "TO THE MOVIE THEATER!"

The cats stampeded to the movie theater.

"What do we want to watch?" Goldenwing asked. "Let's see, we have every single Harry Potter movie, every single Twilight movie, the Hunger Games movie, Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief, Chuckie, Planet of the Apes, Friday the Thirteenth, Finding Nemo, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, Trouble With the Curve, Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, Rise of the Guardians, Ted, That's my Boy, and Wreck-It Ralph!"

"CINDERELLA!" screamed Lionblaze.

Everyone stared at him.

"What?" he mewed defensively. "It's a good movie."

"PLANET OF THE APES!" roared the warriors.

"BEAUTY AND THE BEAST!" squealed the she-kits.

"THE HUNGER GAMES!" screamed Catokit.

"HARRY POTTER MARATHON!" yowled HarryPotterkit.

"PERCY JACKSON!" announced Annabethkit.

"TWILIGHT!" squealed Bellakit.

"TED!" screamed all the cats (kits included).

"Ted it is." Goldenwing grabbed the DVD and popped it into the player.

"THUNDER BUDDIES!" sang the kits.

Sensitivekit sighed. "I think I'm scarred for life."

"HAHA!" roared Hahakit.

"Num nums!" sang NumNumkit, eating a pie that was meant for Cinderblaze.

"HEY YOU!" she screamed, when she saw NumNumkit. "DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH MAH NUM-NUMS!"

"Heehee!" NumNumkit giggled, and ate it all.

Cinderblaze got a blow-up mallet and began whacking NumNumkit, who was now stuffing his face with candy.

"MY PANTS ARE FALLING FROM THE SKYYYY!" sang CinderxLion00isawesome.

"You don't have pants!" roared Shadowheart. "You're a _cat_, for StarClan's sake!"

"You're no fun." pouted Cinderxlion00isawesome, and walked away.

* * *

"WHEE!" a cat flew into the room.

"WHO ARE YOU?!" yelled Bramblestar. "YOU ARE BREAKING AND ENTERING!"

"I'm entering, but I'm not breaking anything!" the cat yowled. "My name is Fireleaf!"

"Wait, aren't you one of the cats Stupidkit bought?" asked Lionblaze.

"Yes." Fireleaf mewed simply.

And then a bunch of cats stampeded in behind her.

"I am CantTouchDis!" announced the first cat, a pretty black she-cat.

The toms drooled. "So hot..."

"I am Deafkit!" screamed a kit.

"WHAT?" yowled Snowkit.

"WHAT?" screamed Deafkit. "I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"

"I AM MACARONIKIT!" announced the next cat.

"I am Milkdapple!" the next cat yowled. "FIREFLIGHT, BE MY MATE!"

"GEEZ! AM I A MAGNET OF SOME SORT?" Fireflight ran away.

"I am Fernlightimpersonator, and this is Jayfeatherimpersonator!" announced a she-cat who looked just like Fernlight.

"AHH!" Fernlight and Jayfeather screamed. "WE HAVE STALKERS!"

"I am Flashpaw!" yowled a tom. "And I am very fast!"

"Oh yeah?" Onestar hissed. "Prove it!"

Flashpaw ran around the world in .000000000000000000001 seconds.

"Well, start!" growled Onestar.

"I did!"

"NO..."

"I'll do it again." Flashpaw ran around the universe in .00000000000001 seconds.

"WHY WON'T YOU START?!" screamed Onestar.

Flashpaw face-pawed. "I give up."

"I am Vixenheart!" yowled a she-cat.

"And I am Minktooth! I want to play trumpet in Coppercreek's band!" a tom yowled.

"Welcome, friend!" Coppercreek patted him on the back.

"I am Fattyface!" a very old tom yowled.

"Another geezer!" Purdy and Freakishlyoldface mewed. "High paw!"

"I am Mapleleaf! And I love pie, and DA PIE!" a tortoiseshell she-cat mewed.

"I LOVE YOU TOO!" DA PIE screamed, and then he kissed Mapleleaf.

"I AM VEGANKIT!" announced the next cat. "ROSEHEART, I WANT YOU TO BE MY MATE!"

"I AM MATES WITH WHITESTREAK!" she screamed. "AND I HAVE KITS TO PROVE IT!"

"The next Ferncloud!" sighed Moonfeather.

"SHOW ME THEM, THEN!" growled Vegankit.

"KKZ!" Roseheart mewed. "These are Starkit, Redkit, Colorkit, Silverkit, Ashkit, and Puzzlekit!" "Dat's a lot of kits!" mewed Yellowsnow.

"I am Birdchaffinch, Shingleaf's brother! And I can fly!" purred a tom.

"And I am Chocolate Pie that Tastes so Darn Good! I am the Healer of the Tribe of Flying Kitties!" a brown she-cat mewed. "I love chocolate pie and the Big Bang Theory!"

"You're hot..." drooled the toms.

"ONE OF OUR KIND!" screamed Sheldonkit.

"I HAVE HAD YET ANOTHER LITTER OF KITS!" announced Ferncloud. "Whoop-de-dang-doo." muttered Whitestreak. "Their names are Monopolykit, Greedykit, Dodokit, Championkit, Loserkit, Nightcloudjuniorkit, and ReincarnationofHalfMoonkit!"

"Wow..." the cats sighed.

"I am Lavenderbreeze!" announced the next cat. "And I am sane!"

"SHUN HER!" screamed Lionblaze.

"CATMINT HER!" ordered Hawkfire.

Two cats in black suits walked up to Lavenderbreeze and stuffed catmint in her mouth and forced her to swallow it.

"I am immune to catmint!" Lavenderbreeze snapped.

"SHUN HER!" screamed Hawkfire.

"I AM LIGHTNINGSTRIKE!" yowled the next tom. "AND I AM HOTTER THAN WHITESTREAK!"

"NO!" Whitestreak snapped. "NO ONE IS HOTTER THAN ME!"

"BE MY MATE!" screamed the she-cats.

Lightningstreak walked off, all the she-cats giggling and running after him, except for Hawkfire, Lavenderbreeze, and Roseheart.

* * *

Goldenwing was playing the viola.

"Hey, Goldenwing, nice violin!" Coppercreek complimented her.

"YOU CALL YOURSELF A BAND MEMBER?!" Goldenwing roared. "THIS IS A VIOLA, NOT A VIOLIN, YOU DUMBHEAD!"

"DON'T KILL ME!" wailed Coppercreek, running away.

* * *

**The Tribe of Flying Kitties is currently accepting cats! Please send 'em in!**


	45. The bush has failed me!

**Please, please, PLEASE don't beg or resend forms for your cats. I haven't put some in yet because I have ideas for that cat specifically and that involves them skipping in the "Cats getting in" chapters.**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Roseheart4271: Sure, I can do that... anyways, feel like filling out a form for Foxkit? Cuz if I guess what you want in Redkit's mate, I'm gonna fail, so... :P**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Warrriors, or anything else you've seen before this story.**

* * *

"SO MANY KITS!" screamed Shadowheart.

"THE CUTENESS!" wailed Tei-Tei, collapsing to the ground. "IT IS OVERWHELMING!"

"GO GROW UP, YOU BUTTHEADS!" screamed Weirdkit.

"YOU JUST SAID BUTT!" laughed Immaturekit.

"MY NEW KITS ARE SOCCERBALLKIT, BASKETBALLKIT, TENNISBALLKIT, SOFTBALLKIT, BASEBALLKIT, BOWLINGBALLKIT, AND POKEBALLKIT!" screamed Dustpelt.

Firestar walked up to him. "Dude, nobody cares anymore." he then walked away.

"PANTS FALLING FROM THE SKYYYY!" sang Cinderblaze and Cinderxlion00isawesome (sung to the tune of Katy Perry's "Wide Awake", BTW)

And then Katy Perry and Kanye West's "E.T." song came on- the explicit version.

"HIDE THE KITS!" screamed Ferncloud. But before she could shove her kits into the nearest bush, they jumped in on their own. Their mother looked very pleased. "They're learning!"

"ATTENTION, KITTIES!" screamed Scarletleaf. "I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT!"

Nobody bothered to listen to her. "LISTEN TO ME!" screamed Scarletleaf, and turned them all a pukey-green color.

"EW!" screamed the cats.

"Whaddya want, Scarletleaf?" sighed Mistystar.

"I HAVE ANOTHER KIT!"

"Whoop-de-dang-do. What a big deal." Shadowheart sighed.

"IT IS A BIG DEAL!" roared Scarletleaf, and turned Shadowheart a baby pink color.

"AHH! PINK! GIRLY COLOR! NOOO!" Shadowheart ran away.

Scarletleaf purred. "This is Sleetkit." she stepped aside.

A pretty little silver she-kit with a diamond in her forehead appeared. "Hiya!" she mewed cutely.

"Aw..." the cats purred.

Shadowheart ran by. "THE CUTENESS! IT'S TOO MUCH TO BEAR!" she died. But then resurrected, cuz she's awesome like dat.

"Guess what?" Silverkit asked cutely.

"What?" asked the cats.

"CAT BUTT!" she screamed, and then fell onto the floor laughing.

"HAHAHA!" the other cats collapsed, laughing.

"How is this funny?" Moonfeather asked Fernlight.

"I really don't know." Fernlight wrinkled her nose.

"TALK TALK TALK TALK..." Furstar babbled.

"SHUT UP!" screamed Jinx and Sootrose.

"JINX!" screamed Jinx.

"The jinx machine is out of order, please put in another quarter!" sang Sootrose.

"NO!" Jinx cried.

"MY NAME IS ICEPOOL!" screamed Icepool.

"Yes, we know that." Lionblaze mewed boredly.

Icepool hissed. "Don't get on my bad side, dude, or you shall meet my pyromaniac side!"

"One of us!" Shadowheart and Tei-Tei ran over to Icepool and hugged her.

"Get off me!" Icepool growled.

Shadowheart wiped away a tear. "I don't like hugs either!"

"I can't believe I wound up here." Lavenderbreeze muttered.

Hawkfire shook her head. "Neither can I!" she then zapped Lavenderbreeze with a craziness remained sane. "How do you do it?" Hawkfire shook her head.

"DANCE OFF!" screamed Cinderblaze.

"I DON'T WANNA!" whined Whinykit.

"WELL, DO IT ANYWAYS!" screamed Orphankit.

"No."

"HEY JESSIE!" screamed the kits.

"SO STICK WITH US CUZ PHINEAS AND FERB ARE GONNA DO IT ALL!"

"YOU'RE GONNA LOVE WHO YOU TURN OUT TO BE!"

The kits sang every single theme song there is on Disney Channel, Nickelodeon, and Cartoon Network. And then...

"IT ALL STARTED WITH A BIG BANG- HEY!"

"I SHOVED YOU IN A BUSH WHEN THAT CAME ON!" screamed Ferncloud. "HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT SONG?!"

"We just did." Smartkit mewed smartly.

"THE BUSH HAS FAILED ME!" Ferncloud began attacking the bush. And then she shredded up all the bushes in the world.

Wow.

* * *

"Now, go press the shiny review button. I have hypnotised you to do so, so write an awesome review..." Novapaw mewed.

And then the esteemed Healer for the Tribe of Flying Kitties leaped in front of Novapaw. "And send in Tribe of Flying Kitties cats!" she sang.

"Press the pretty review button... you know you want to..." the two mewed in a hypnotic voice.

* * *

**I've got a new poll on my profile, and it concerns the fiftieth chapter (Yes, there will be one, *Whoops*). PLEASE vote on it! I've gotta have all results in by the fiftieth chapter!**


	46. Why must I have shredded all the bushes?

"Can all cats gather underneath Highledge for a Clan meeting!" yowled Bramblestar.

The cats ran out of their dens, waiting to hear what their esteemed and polished leader had to say. Bramblestar was silent for a minute, and then looked directly at Cloudtail and screamed, "YOUR CHIN SHALL BE MINE!" and then he jumped off of Highledge and attacked Cloudtail.

"His chin?" wondered Brackenfur. "What's that about?"

"YOUR CHIN SHALL SUFFER GREATLY!" screamed Bramblestar, using his claws to flick Cloudtail's chin.

"NO, YOUR CHIN SHALL SUFFER! IT WILL BE MINE!" Cloudtail screamed, leaping on Bramblestar.

And then they both collapsed onto the ground. Moonfeather was holding a syringe. "Well, both of them have Chinitis. It is a disease that is spread by flicking another's chin. It is a disease that causes you to be obsessed by flicking another's chin and saying things like, "Your chin will be mine", and "your chin will suffer greatly"."

"That's strange." Brackenfur mewed.

"This world is strange." muttered Moonfeather.

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Wolffur. "I AM GETTING MARRIED TO JAYFEATHER!"

"JAYFEATHER, YOU ARE BREAKING THE WARRIOR CODE!" screamed Hollyleaf.

"So? Leafpool did it, Yellowfang did it, Cinderpelt and Spottedleaf could've done it, so why don't I?" Jayfeather shrugged.

"BECAUSE YOU ARE MY BROTHER, SO YOU CAN'T BREAK THE RULES!" screamed Hollyleaf.

Then Hawkfire appeared. "Oh, can it, you goody-goody. Let there be a wedding!" she clapped her paws and poofed them to a church.

"Hoooo boy." groaned Icepool. She, Shadowheart, and Tei-Tei were in dresses.

And then Shadowheart ripped off her dress to reveal a tuxedo.

The two other she-cats stared at her. "What the..."

"It's better than wearing a dress." Shadowheart growled defensively.

"Well, yeah." Tei-Tei then ripped off her dress to reveal a tuxedo. Icepool followed.

So the bridesmaids were Fernlight, Peppercloud, Moonfeather, and the three tuxedo she-cats. The maid of honor was Hollyleaf, who didn't look very pleased supporting her brother's marriage. The groomsmen were Lionblaze, Crowfeather, Breezepelt, Bramblestar, and Onestar. The flower girls were Orphankit and Whinykit. The ring bearer was Spoiledkit, assisted by ABCkit.

There was normal wedding music. But when the two flower girls came skipping down the aisle, since they didn't feel like using just petals from the flowers, they threw them. And guess what? They were roses.

"OUCHIE!"

"These thorns are digging into my fur!"

"Heehee!" Orphankit squealed.

"You're evil." whined Goodkit.

And then Swedish House Mafia's song "Don't you worry Child" came on and Wolffur came skipping down the aisle.

Purdy arrived and yakked his head off.

Finally, after a month, Jayfeather and Wolffur were married.

"You may now kiss the bride!" Purdy mewed.

They kissed.

"NO!" screamed Ferncloud. "WHERE IS A BUSH WHEN YOU NEED ONE?!"

"You shredded them all!" snapped Dustpelt, covering several of the kits' eyes.

"Oh. Right."

"PARTY!" screamed Discokit.

And then the church transformed into a dance floor.

"BOOGIE!" screamed a cat.

"Who are you?" asked Lionblaze.

"SWIFTWING!" she screamed. "Boogie, boogie!"

"WAHOO!" screamed the cats.

"VA VA VOOM!" the speakers blared.

"OMG IT'S NICKI MINAJ!" screamed the cats.

Ferncloud sobbed. "WHY COULDN'T I HAVE JUST LEFT THE BUSHES ALONE?!"

"Cuz you stink!" Grumpykit mewed.

"HOW DARE YOU!" screamed Fernlight.

"LOOKIT!" screamed Anotherkit. "I HAZ A GIANT BANANA!" he held up a giant banana.

"IT'S A BANANA!" screamed the cats. "ALL HAIL ZE GREAT AND POWERFUL BANANA!"

Lavenderbreeze sighed. "This is ridiculous."

Then an extremely hot cat walked over to Fernlight. "Hi." he mewed, all hot-like. "I brought you a drink."

"I don't want a drink." Fernlight slapped the drink away.

"Why not?"

"I'm not thirsty. Who are you, anyway?"

"That Cat that Keeps Stalking You."

"Well, then..." Fernlight slowly backed away.

* * *

**Reply to reviews:**

**Fireflight: I kinda thought of Fernlight as a "Single Lady", unless Fernlight says otherwise. If she doesn't say anything, I'd kinda like to keep her single. What she and Moonfeather do to cats who love them is one of the things that makes this story funny. So... until further notice, she and her sister are off the market.**

**Fernlight: There are so many Whitestreak Fangirls out there... and what do you say about Fernlight having a mate?**

**PS. Don't forget to vote if you haven't done so already!**


	47. Chapter 47 heehee

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Everyone who wants their cats to be Fernlight's mate: "Hm... I'll say this, anyone who wants to make Fernlight's mate PM me... then I will choose my precious kitty's mate. By the way, I might reject them all. Until then she will continue shamelessly flirting". That's a quote from Fernlight. So PM your cat to Fernlight if you want your cat to be her mate. If you don't have an account, just send in the cat by review, and Fernlight can check them out that way (If that's KK with her).**

* * *

The cats were being normal. Eating normal, speaking normal, and going out on patrols normal.

That is, until Goldenwing ran in.

Eyes wide with fear, she burst into the camp.

"HELP! HELP!" she screeched. "WE HAVE A PROBLEM! AN EMERGENCY!"

The cats jumped to their feet.

"What is it?" asked Bramblestar.

Goldenwing began to sob. "MY CHAPSTICK HAS GONE MISSING!"

The cats began to panic.

"NO!" screamed Lionblaze, over-dramatically, collapsing to the ground. "WHAT SHALL WE DO?!"

"We must look for it! Search the seas!" Goldenwing mewed. "Search the land! Search everywhere!" she yowled. Then she began distributing orders. "Group One, go search the lake! Group Two, go search ShadowClan! Group Three, WindClan. Group Four, RiverClan. Group Five, the island. Group Six, go post these flyers up on trees." she tossed paper at Group Six.

Blossomfall, who was part of Group Six, picked up one. "Missing Chapstick, if found, please contact Goldenwing at 1-800-Funness... The reward is fifty mice." her eyes turned insane. "OMG MICE!" she grabbed a pile of flyers and ran out of the camp.

"I shall search the camp!" she mewed.

Meanwhile, Lionblaze had snuck off into the warriors den. "Finally..." he sighed. "We're alone!" he had stolen Goldenwing's Chapstick. He began to kiss it.

Goldenwing burst into the den. "HALT, THEIF!" she yowled. "Oh wait, it's just Lionblaze kissing my Chapstick." she walked out.

"One... two... three..." Lionblaze muttered.

Goldenwing burst into the den again. "MY CHAPSTICK!" she screamed. "HOW DARE YOU?!"

"It is just so pretty, and I want things I can't have!" Lionblaze whined.

Goldenwing pulled out a bat and began spanking Lionblaze with it.

"OUCHIE!" Lionblaze screamed, running out of the room, dropping the Chapstick. Goldenwing grabbed her Chapstick and hugged it close.

"That vain devil." she grumbled. "I shall have my revenge..."

And then the cats came back. "It's not in WindClan!" called Thornclaw.

"Nor RiverClan!" Mousewhisker added.

"It's definitely in ShadowClan, or else Blackstar wouldn't have driven us off!" called Bramblestar.

Goldenwing sighed, and walked out of the warriors den. "It's right here!" she announced.

The cats let out a sigh of relief. "That's good." they mewed.

"LIONBLAZE STOLE IT!" Goldenwing roared.

"THAT'S NOT GOOD!" ThunderClan attacked Lionblaze.

* * *

"The Super Bowl is this Sunday!" cheered Footballkit.

"Yay!" the cats purred. "Commercials!"

"The commercials so funny!" nodded Soccerkit.

"Dramatic flashbacks on the best ones!" mewed Fernlight.

"Yay!" Mosskit squealed. "Dramatic flashback time!"

"First up..." an announcer mewed. "The Budweiser Frogs of 1995!"

"NO!" screamed Ferncloud. "NOT A BEER COMMERCIAL!" she shoved her kits into a bush (man, those grew back fast).

Sadly, the bush didn't prevent them from hearing or seeing the commercial.

"Bud!" croaked the first kit.

"Weis!" ribbited the second kit.

"Er!" sang the third.

"THE BUSH HAS FAILED ME... AGAIN!" Ferncloud attacked the bushes. Again. "I shall never trust them again!"

The next time something inappropriate came on, she stuffed the kits into a tree.

What a strange Mommy.

* * *

"MWAHAHA!" cackled Lightningstrike evilly. He then sent a big thunderstorm to attack the whole world. So if you're in a stormy place, now you know why.

Lightningstrike feels like making the world gloomy.

Mwahahaha...


	48. 600 reviews!

**Wow... over 600 reviews! I can't believe it! And it was, what, 4 chapters ago I was excited for 500 reviews? You guys are incredible, really!**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Swiftstorm: And her mate is...?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own One Direction, Justin Bieber, Katy Perry, M&Ms, the Budweiser Frogs, Warriors, Hall of Fame, or anything else you've seen before this story.**

**I also incorporated the "Firestar Doesn't Like Waffles" video, so if you haven't watched that video, some of this won't make much sense, so don't watch it! This isn't supposed to make much sense! LOL**

**On with the chapter! **

* * *

"WE HAVE A PROBLEM, FOLKS!" Graystripe screamed. "FIRESTAR DOESN'T LIKE WAFFLES!"

"That is a problem!" gasped the cats.

Bluestar rode down in a pretty pink Barbie car. "I FOUND A CARROT!" she screamed.

"OMG IT'S A CARROT!" the cats screamed.

* * *

"IT WAS HARRY STYLES'S BIRTHDAY YESTERDAY!" screamed Poppyfrost. Her fur was curled for the occasion.

"Wow." Hawkfire sighed. "Why is One Direction such a big deal?"

"ACORNS!" screamed Lionblaze, flying by. Acorns began to rain from the sky.

"Because they're hot!" Poppyfrost purred.

"No they're not. They're ugly!" Hawkfire hissed.

"HOW DARE YOU!" screamed Poppyfrost. She leaped at Hawkfire, and was flung back. "How the heck did that happen?" she asked.

"Because I'm magical."

"Right."

"THIS IS THE PART OF ME THAT YOU'RE NEVER GONNA TAKE AWAY FROM ME!" screamed the toms.

"YOU DON'T KNOW YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL!" screamed the she-cats.

"This isn't over." Lionblaze mewed with shifty eyes. "Katy Perry shall win!" he flew away.

"BATMAN!" sang the cats, and then began to party.

"This world makes no sense." sighed Lavenderbreeze.

"You make no sense." Hawkfire groaned. "You're SANE!"

"I know. And you're insane!" Lavenderbreeze meowed.

"YOU DARE ANGER ME?!" Hawkfire began chasing her, and pelting her with Justin Bieber trading cards.

"What the..." Lavenderbreeze mewed.

"ME DON'T LIKE BELIEBERS OR DIRECTIONERS!" screamed Hawkfire.

"Yes, we got that." Lavenderbreeze hissed.

"You are getting on my bad side." Hawkfire hissed.

"I WANT TACOS!" screamed Mousewhisker.

"FIRESTAR DOESN'T LIKE WAFFLES!" Graystripe screamed. He was still in shock over this fact.

"Do you need thyme?" asked Jayfeather kindly.

"Please." Graystripe sighed.

"WELL, YOU AREN'T GETTING ANY!" Jayfeather cackled, and ran away.

* * *

"I WANT PIE!" screamed DA PIE.

"SO DO I!" screamed Mapleleaf.

"PIE!" they screamed, and then they burst into Bramblestar's den. "WHERE IS THE PIE?!" roared DA PIE.

"Yes, where?" growled Mapleleaf.

"Here." Bramblestar handed over several pies.

DA PIE and Mapleleaf gobbled them up and made the den explode.

"DANG IT!" screamed Bramblestar, running out of the ashes. "I CAN'T GIVE THEM PIE!" he fell off of Highledge.

"Not again!" groaned Jayfeather.

"PARTY!" screamed Deafkit. "I SHALL DJ!"

"But you can't hear anything!" mewed Cinderheart.

"What?" asked Deafkit. "I can't hear you!"

"I'm not going to go through this." Cinderheart mewed, walking away.

"STANDING IN THE HALL OF FAME!" sang the cats.

"We are not standing in the Hall of Fame!" CaptainObviouskit growled.

The cats ignored him and continued to sing. "You could go the distance, you could run the mile, you could walk straight through-"

"DON'T YOU DARE!" screamed Ferncloud, shoving her kits into a tree.

"-WITH A SMILE!" screamed the cats.

Deafkit pouted. "I wish I could hear the music!" she then put her paw over the speaker. "Better. Hey, Snowkit, come try this!"

"WHAT?!" screamed Snowkit.

"WHAT?!" screamed Deakit.

"Not this again!" Jayfeather sighed.

"This is ridiculous!" Lightningstrike hissed. "WHY WAS I NOT INVITED TO THIS PARTY?!" he roared. He then struck the Catmint pile with lightning.

"NO!" Lionblaze screamed. He immediately began to suffer from Catmint Withdrawal.

"HOW DARE YOU!" screamed the cats, and ran to attack him.

"GRR!" screamed Lightningstrike, running away.

* * *

"The Superbowl is tomorrow!" purred Bramblestar. "I'm betting that the 49ers will win!"

"Who are you kidding?" scoffed Onestar. "The Ravens will win!"

"THE RAVENS BEAT THE PATRIOTS!" screamed Patriotskit. "I HATE THEM!"

"WELL, THE 49ERS BEAT THE PACKERS!" screamed Packerskit. "I HATE THEM!"

"GRR!" screamed everyone.

"I'M SEXY AND I KNOW IT!" screamed a TV.

"OMG THE M&Ms SEXY AND I KNOW IT SUPERBOWL COMMERCIAL FROM LAST YEAR!" the cats screamed, and began to party.

Ferncloud stuffed her kits into a tree, because the Budweiser Frogs had returned.

"Man, that is one insane queen." Angelhalo mewed.

"You're insane! You're a verb!" Hollyleaf mewed. "Ever heard of 'throwing an Angelhalo'?"

"I'M A VERB! YAY!" Angelhalo began to dance.

"Well then..."


	49. Chapter 49!

**49th chapter! Woohoo! Anyways, this story will be going on for as long as possible, so...**

**Okay, so it seems like the cats will be discovering fanfiction next chapter, so what stories do you want them to read? Send in names of stories and perhaps the cats will read 'em...**

**Oh yeah, I made a forum called "RandomClan". It's a RP forum that goes along with this story, and it's made up of OCs. Join in if you want! The link is on my profile, if you want to join.**

* * *

"Mwa ha ha ha!" Fireflight cackled. She and some of the others had locked Goldenwing, Freakishlyoldface, Whitestreak, Fernlight, Moonfeather, Angelhalo, Shadowheart, Tei-Tei, and Icepool in a cage. "MINORS SHALL RULE THE WORLD!" she screamed, and magically flew away.

"We shall zap out of this cage!" Whitestreak announced. He tried and failed.

Fireflight flew back. "It's magic-proof!"

"HOW DARE YOU!"

She flew away again.

* * *

"I stole Goldenwing's Chapstick!" yowled Lionblaze. Then he pouted. "Are you going to chase me!?" he yelled.

Fireflight appeared beside him. "No, she is not. She's trapped in a cage!"

* * *

Goldenwing shook the bars of the cage. "LIONBLAZE TOOK MAH CHAPSTICK!" she screamed.

"Gurl, you have a very unhealthy obsession with that thing." Angelhalo mewed.

"You've got an unhealthy obsession with the Hunger Games, so you shouldn't be talking."

"Right."

* * *

"Hey, where's Fernlight?" asked That Cat.

Fireflight began to scream. "LET THEM GO ALREADY!"

"FIREFLIGHT, BE IN OUR BAND!" Coppercreek and Tenderfoot yowled. "Goldenwing joined us!"

"LET THEM GO!" Fireflight screamed. "THEY. ARE. TRAPPED. IN. A. CAGE! LET THEM GO!"

"Touché." the cats backed away.

"Finally." Fireflight slumped to the ground.

"Hey, have you seen Fernl-" Gorgeousleaf asked.

"YES! SHE'S IN A CAGE!" Fireflight screamed at her.

"Ooh!" Gorgeousleaf clapped her paws. "I want to join her!"

"Fine." Fireflight zapped her into the cage.

"Hi, boys!" Shiningleaf walked into ThunderClan's camp.

"YOU'RE HOT!" screamed the toms.

"I also want to train to be a medicine cat!" Shiningleaf hissed.

The toms began sobbing. Then the other pretty she-cats came in. The toms brightened immediately and began to flirt.

"My god." Shiningleaf rolled her eyes, and walked into Jayfeather's den. "What the..."

Jayfeather was pouring one substance into another, and all of them were blowing up in his face. "WHAT DO YOU WANT?!" he screamed, as another substance blew up.

"Um, to become a medicine cat..."

"COME BACK ANOTHER DAY!" he yowled, as another explosion happened.

"PIE PIE PIE!" screamed Mapleleaf and DA PIE.

"Yes, we get it!" growled Fireflight.

"Well, maybe Littlecloud or Kestrelflight will be willing to teach me..." Shiningleaf backed away.

Furstar and Purdy were yakking their heads off, and Peppercloud was dating toms and cheating on them. Novapaw was hypnotizing cats, and Lightningstrike was making lightning happen. That Cat was obsessing over Fernlight, and Coppercreek and Tenderfoot were still trying to get Fireflight to join their band.

* * *

**Meanwhile...**

"LOOKIE!" screamed Gorgeousleaf. "I found a spoon!" she held up a plastic spoon.

"Maybe we can dig our way out!" Angelhalo mewed hopefully.

Gorgeousleaf attempted to dig and only broke the spoon.

"Shadowheart, you have the power for explosions, so why don't we bomb our way out of here?" Icepool mewed.

"Yeah!" Shadowheart didn't manage to make the cell explode, but she made Gorgeousleaf explode.

"Whoa."

And then Gorgeousleaf stepped into view.

"What the..." Shadowheart mewed. "But I just blew you up!" That was my emergency Gorgeousleaf. In case I got blown up!" Gorgeousleaf smiled.

"Well then..."

* * *

"WE ARE MINORS AND WE RULE THE WORLD!" sang the other cats. Fireflight was conducting a chorus in celebration that the major cats were gone.

And then Fernlight appeared beside her, looking very angry. "HOW DARE YOU?!" she roared.

"Dunno." Fireflight shrugged.

"OH NO!" sang the chorus.

"Oh, shut up." growled Shadowheart.

They began to chase the others. "Gr..."

Fireflight growled.

"BE IN OUR BAND, FIREFLIGHT!" screamed Coppercreek and Tenderfoot, as Shadowheart attempted to blow them up.

"NOT THE TIME, YOU BUTTHEADS!"

"MY PANTS ARE FALLING FROM THE SKYYY!" sang Cinderblaze.

"NOT THE TIME, CINDERBLAZE!" Fireflight roared.

* * *

"Place your bets for the Superbowl and the Puppybowl!" yelled Lionblaze.

"NOT THE PUPPYBOWL!" screamed Bramblestar. "WE ARE CATS, NOT DOGS!"

"Or are we?" Fireflight mewed with shifty eyes.

"I BET ON THE RAVENS!" screamed Ravenskit.

"I BET ON THE 49ERS!" screamed 49erskit.

"YOU LIE!" screamed Ravenskit, attacking 49erskit.

"This is crazy." Lavenderbreeze sighed.

"And you aren't!" growled Hawkfire. "WE HAVE A PROBLEM!"

"Oh, shut up."

"NO, YOU UPSHUT!"

"Well then..."


	50. Chapter 50! PARTY!

**50th chapter! Whoo-hoo! I know this isn't done, but I think I need to thank some people...**

**First, my biggest thank-you is to Fernlight, who continues to give ideas and support to this story.**

**My next biggest thank-yous go to Chococrazygrrl8, Contrary to Popular Belief, Fireflight, Goldenwing, and Cinderxlion00, who support this story, give me ideas, and seem to be checking up on this story 24/7! Thanks! (PS. Goldenwing, I used one of your stories, in here, hope you don't mind...)**

**And thank-you to everyone who reads and reviews this story! I can't believe how many people have read this story...**

**Oh yeah, thanks to everyone who joined RandomClan! There are still spaces open if you want to join (The link's on my profile...).**

**ON WITH THE CHAPTER!**

**(PS. I don't own anything except for my cats and some of the stories)**

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Bramblestar, at a Gathering. "I HAVE DISCOVERED FANFICTION! GET OUT YOUR INTERNET-CONNECTED THINGIES AND SEARCH IT!"

"KKZ!" the cats responded, and pulled out their iPhones, iPads, iPods, Smartphones, laptops, and everything else.

"This is weird!" the Lionblaze mewed.

Hollyleaf began to run in circles. "OMG THIS IS AGAINST THE WARRIOR CODE!" she screamed.

"Let's see this story!" purred Gorgeousleaf. He jaw dropped. "Whoa... what's this story?" she clicked on it, then shrunk away. "Ew..."

"HIDE THE KITS!" Ferncloud screamed, panicking, then shoving them up a tree.

"Oh my..." Fernlight was reading a story. "Check this out!" she called. "Read, "When StarClan gets Bored", by Chucklez-Lives-On!"

"Chucklez!" Cinderblaze gasped. "You're a writer?"

"No!" Chucklez-Lives-On mewed.

"Well, it seems like it, because it features all of us!" Fernlight snarled.

"CHUCKLEZ IS A TRAITOR!" wailed the cats.

"NO I'M NOT!"

"Then you have a fangirl or something." Brackenfur mewed smartly.

Fireflight looked around with shifty eyes. "Or a stalker!"

"Read the other stories the author has!" somebody called out.

"OH MY STARCLAN CINDERHEART SINCE WHEN DID WE HAVE FIVE KITS?!" yowled Lionblaze.

"I really don't know." Cinderheart mewed, puzzled.

"OH MY STARCLAN WE'RE DEAD!" Sorreltail and Blackstar screamed, running around in circles. Then they collapsed into each others arms, sobbing.

"NO! IT CAN'T BE!" Brackenfur sobbed. "SORRELTAIL CAN'T BE DEAD!"

"Well, apparently I can!" Sorreltail snapped.

"MILLIE'S EVIL!" screamed Graystripe.

Hawkfire rolled her eyes. "So you finally caught on."

"WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!" sobbed Graystripe.

Jayfeather began jumping up and down. "I WILL NEVER BE BRIARLIGHT'S MATE! OR HALF MOON'S, OR WILLOWSHINE'S! THE STICK SHALL BE MY MATE, AND THAT'S THAT!"

"Oh dear." Mousefur sighed.

"MOUSEFUR!" Purdy screamed. "SINCE WHEN WERE WE MATES?!"

"Since never." "WELL, TAKE A LOOK AT THIS!" Purdy shoved his laptop into Mousefur's face.

"OH NO THEY DID NOT! WHO THE HECK WROTE THIS?!"

Tigerstar began reading a story. "I do not have anger issues!" he roared. "I wanna find this author and rip them in half!"

"You're kinda proving the point..." Hawkfrost muttered.

Tigerstar continued to read the stories. "That is not how Goldenflower and I broke up!" he muttered.

Goldenwing looked at the story. "Shopping with Warrior Cats, by Goldenwing..." her jaw dropped. "I'M AN AUTHOR!"

"So am I." Fernlight nodded.

"Or you have a stalker!" Whitestreak teased.

"Absolutely not!" Fernlight hissed.

"Um, hello!" That Cat raised his paw.

"Except for him." Fernlight nodded. "And I don't think he's an author."

"Warrior Cats, Three in One?" Wolffur mewed. "Hm..."

"MORE RANDOMNESS!" cried Lionblaze.

"It seems like you're an author!" Jayfeather mewed to his mate, Wolffur.

"I don't think so. This says "Wolf that Howls at Eclipse".." Wolffur mewed.

"I still think you're an author." Jayfeather mewed with shifty eyes.

"YOU NEED TO TRUST YOUR MATE!" screamed Wolffur.

"Touché..."

"And this says you're an explosion scientist... and you love the Stick!" Wolffur growled. "Jayfeather, are you cheating on me?"

"YES! NO! MAYBE!" Jayfeather ran away, but because he's blind, he crashed into a tree. Wolffur got him and dragged him away.

"Hm... "Kind of Forbidden", by Chococrazygrrl8..." Leafpool began reading. "I am so shippng LeafxCrow!"

"That's you, dumbhead!" mewed Lionblaze.

"Right."

"CinderxFire..." Firestar mewed. "Well, I prefer myself with Sandstorm, but... okay..." (NOTE: he only says this cuz Sandstorm would attack him if he said otherwise...).

"SILVERXGRAY FOREVAH!" Graystripe screamed.

"HOW DARE YOU!" Millie screamed.

"You're evil, so..."

"GRR!"

"Feathertail and I?" Tigerstar mewed. "I've got two mates, so why not add a third? FEATHERTAIL, BE MY MATE!"

Feathertail screamed. "Over my dead body!" she ran away.

Roseheart was reading "When StarClan gets Bored". "Whitestreak, are you cheating on me? It says here that you've flirted with she-cats at a casino!"

"That was before you came around, sweetie." Whitestreak patted her on the back.

"Good. Because if you were cheating on me, I'd shred you!"

Lionblaze was sobbing. "What a touching story!" he mewed, wiping his eyes.

Leafpool peered over his shoulder. "What?"

"A Blazing Blue Destruction. It's about Bluestar's kits!" Lionblaze blew his nose.

Leafpool rolled her eyes. "Random..."

"Read this!" Squirrelflight shoved her iPad in Bramblestar's face.

"What? Starkit's Prophecy Repost..." Bramblestar began to read. Then his face lit up. "LOL! So LOL!" he grinned.

"THERE ARE STALKERS OUT THERE!" screamed Lionblaze.

"Who?" Hollyleaf asked.

"Erin Hunter!"

"SHE STALKS US!" Hollyleaf screamed. "THAT'S AGAINST THE WARRIOR CODE! SHE MUST BE PUNISHED!"

And so they went to Erin Hunter's house and punished her for breaking the Warrior Code, and made her promise to never write stories abouth them again.

And then they died, because without her writing about them, they cannot live. So they agreed to let her continue to write.


	51. Commercials! Whee

**Reply to Reviews:**

**oOJayfeatheroO- Yes I do. DO YOU? *Stares intently***

**Moonsnow- Interesting... but it was slightly confusing, because some words got smushed together.**

**Chococrazygrrl8- You're welcome! And of course, I know that Erin Hunter is several people. But this story isn't supposed to make sense, so...**

**And um, it may contain spoilers. Sorry, but I'll try only to leave minor spoilers, if any at all. **

**ON WITH THE CHAPTER!**

* * *

"YOU CAN WALK STRAIGHT THROUGH-"

"DON'T YOU DARE!"

The Elder Chorus had returned. And they were trying to sing "hip" songs. And Ferncloud had agreed to let them sing to her kits. And now she was stuffing them up a tree.

Not the kits. The elders.

"ONE DAY WHEN THE LIGHT IS GLOWING, I'LL BE IN MY CASTLE GOLDEN..." the elders screamed as they were stuffed up the tree.

"THIS IS NOT NECESSARY!" Ferncloud screamed.

And then the kits began to sing "Thrift Shop".

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO THEM?!" wailed Ferncloud as the kits began to swear.

Purdy shrugged. "We didn't do this one. I believe ABCkit is responsible for this." "ABCkit, I AM GOING TO GET YOU!" Ferncloud ran out of the nursery.

* * *

"Welcome to... Let's Get Fernlight a Mate! I'm your host, Moonfeather, and I will not be dating ANYBODY today." Moonfeather smiled at the camera, which then moved to Fernlight, who was chained to the wall, because she kept trying to escape.

"I'M DOING THIS AGAINST MY WILL!" Fernlight screamed. "HELP ME!"

"Nah, no one will help you." Moonfeather shrugged. "Anyways, let's meet today's contestants! We have Lionblaze, who seems to be cheating on Cinderheart again, That Cat that Keeps Stalking You, or That Cat for short, Bramblestar, and- WHITESTREAK WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! THAT'S DISGUSTING BRO!"

Whitestreak was sitting in one of the chairs meant for the contestants.

"No, no!" he mewed. "I just wanted seats up close! The ticket seller just had me slip him a couple mice, and BAM! Here I am."

"I AM GOING TO KILL YOU, PURDY!" screamed Moonfeather, running off the stage.

Then there were commercials.

"Da da da da da... COMMERCIALS!" sang someone.

And then they went back.

"So, we're back!" Moonfeather mewed happily and innocently. "So, Fernlight, whaddya think of the contestants?"

"I hate them."

"That's no way to talk to your future husband!" That Cat purred.

Fernlight growled at him.

Moonfeather forced her to ask the contestants questions, and after that, Moonfeather asked, "So... who's gonna be your mate?"

Fernlight was silent for a few minutes, and then announced, "None of them." then she escaped the chains and ran away.

"Well, that went... well." Moonfeather shrugged. "I'll get her a mate someday."

And then the screen went black.

* * *

"WAHOO!" a bunch of cats flew into the Gathering area.

"WHO ARE YOU?!" roared Bramblestar.

"I am Fattyface!" announced a fat tom who had My Little Pony markings.

"Well then..."

"I am Megan, and I shall join the Clans!" announced a blue-gray she-cat.

"Kay, your warrior name shall be..." Bramblestar began.

"I shall keep my name." Megan mewed simply.

"All righty, then."

"I am Dinokit, and this is Scardykit." a Russian Blue kit mewed. "And I love dinosaurs! Have any of you ever seen Jurassic Park...?"

"I am Mashedface!" announced the next cat.

"UGLINESS!" screamed Angelhalo. "GET AWAY FROM ME!" she ran away.

"My name is Turtlewing, and I am Hawkfrost's daughter and I blow up things!" the next cat announced.

"THAT'S MY THING!" roared Shadowheart, and then pounced on Turtlewing and dragged her away.

"Who's the mother?" wondered Lionblaze.

Nobody noticed that Mistystar had snuck away.

"I am Grassstar, and I am serious and random."

"THAT WAS RANDOM." Lionblaze yowled. The cats stared at him. "What?"

"I HAVE HAD ANOTHER LITTER OF KITS!" announced Ferncloud. "They are named Jackfrostkit, Toothfairykit, and Pitchblackkit!"

"Sweetheart, no one cares anymore." Dustpelt patted her on the back.

"And I am Jaystorm, and I am sane!" announced a silver tabby tom.

"One of my kind!" Lavenderbreeze rushed to his side.

"I am Fallenwish, Jaystorm's sister, and I am one of the few she-cats who despise One Direction!" A ginger tabby she-cat announced.

Hawkfire fainted from joy and then began to hug Fallenwish. "YOU SHALL BE MY NEW BFF!" she screamed.

Fernlight growled. "What about me?"

Hawkfire gave her shifty eyes. "Do you like One Direction?"

"Um..."

* * *

**CLIFFIE! Mwa ha ha ha! **

**...Fernlight, I need you to tell me if she likes 1D. I'm gonna have a poll on my profile, and would you be ever so kind as to vote on it? **


	52. Trying and Failing

**700 reviews! You guys are awesome! *Hugs and never lets go***

**What's with all the talk about me ending this? Look, I made a promise to myself and I may as well share it with you: I won't be ending this story until I run out of ideas. And with all of you helping me, I don't think that will be ever. So... I may as well name this "The Story that Goes on Forever!" So don't fear, this story'll be around for a long time. A long, long, long, looooooooooooooooooooooooong time. Kapeesh?**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Spottedfur of WindClan: It's so great you got an account! To make a story, you've gotta type one up, copy and paste or write your chapters into document manager (find it in the "Publish" section of things), and then when you have it, click "New story" and "select a document" is for what you want the story to contain- the chapter for that. Hopefully this helps, but I can do more, because you were kinda freaking out and I didn't exactly understand WHAT you were saying :)**

**Moonsnow: No need to apologize! Reviews just aren't the best place to post stories... XD**

* * *

**Previously, on "When StarClan gets Bored":**

_"I am Fallenwish, Jaystorm's brother. And I despise One Direction!" a ginger tabby she-cat announced._

_Hawkfire fainted from joy and then began to hug Fallenwish. "YOU SHALL BE MY NEW BFF!" she screamed._

_Fernlight growled. "What about me?"_

_Hawkfire gave her shifty eyes. "Do you like One Direction?"_

_"Um..."_

* * *

"I DON'T!"

"ONE OF OUR KIND!" screamed Fallenwish, Fireflight, and Hawkfire. They had a big group hug with Fernlight.

"One Direction is hot, though!" whined Gorgeousleaf.

Fallenwish batted her eyelashes innocently. "I've got portraits of them. Wanna see?"

"Sure!" Gorgeousleaf mewed.

Fallenwish shoved the pictures into her face. Gorgeousleaf looked at them and began to sob. "THAT'S MEAN AND CRUEL!" she sobbed.

Then the four 1D-hater she-cats began to sing One Direction songs mockingly. "GO DIE IN A HOLE!" screamed Gorgeousleaf and Poppyfrost, who were leaders of the "I Love 1D" club. Their ranks advanced on the four she-cats.

And then Starstar, Cinderblaze, and Cinderxlion00isawesome jumped in front of them and began to sing "Sexy and I Know it".

"Well then..." Hawkfire mewed.

"RUMOR HAS IT, OOH!" they moved onto Adele's "Rumor has it".

Fallenwish pulled out her phone and looked at something. "OMG RUMOR HAS IT ONE DIRECTION'S BREAKING UP!" she screamed.

"YAY!" the four she-cats did another group hug, while the "I Love 1D" club, collapsed into each other's arms and sobbed.

And so did Berrynose. He loves One Direction, remember?

"NO!" screamed Berrynose. "IF ONE DIRECTION BREAKS UP, I'LL DIE!"

"Maybe it's for the better!" Shadowheart patted him on the back.

"If One Direction breaks up?" Berrynose sniffed, confused at the phrase and why Shadowheart was being kind.

"No, if you die."

"WHAA!" Berrynose sobbed, and ran to Daisy. "MOMMY, THAT MEAN SHE-CAT IS BULLYING ME!"

Daisy attacked Shadowheart. Shadowheart attempted to blow her up, but then failed, because an angry Daisy is indestructible, and so she ran away.

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Swiftstorm. "I'VE GOT A MATE! HIS NAME IS SHADOWHEART!"

"BUT THAT'S MY NAME!" roared Shadowheart, who continued running away from Daisy.

"WELL, DEAL WITH IT!" roared Icepool.

"HOW DARE YOU!" Shadowheart attacked her. Tei-Tei decided to join in, and Daisy jumped on all of them. But because Daisy's so fat from sitting around in the nursery all day, she nearly suffocated them all.

"Wait... Daisy... you left the nursery?" Cinderblaze gasped. "WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO THIS WORLD?!"

"OMG I LEFT THE NURSERY! I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO LEAVE THUNDERCLAN'S CAMP, LET ALONE THE NURSERY!" screamed Daisy, running around in circles.

Hollyleaf began to run in circles. "THAT MUST BE AGAINST THE WARRIOR CODE! DAISY LEAVING THE NURSERY MUST BE ILLEGAL!" she ran around in circles with Daisy.

Starstar decided that running in circles was fun, so she joined Daisy and Hollyleaf, screaming for donuts.

Then Daisy jumped into Cloudtail's arms. "Hold me!" she whimpered.

"PAWS OFF MY WOMAN, LADY!" Brightheart barreled into Daisy, and dragged her away.

"Oh, speaking of that, I'M NOT DONE WITH ANY OF YOU!" roared Shadowheart, and dragged Shadowheart Number 2, Icepool, Tei-Tei, and Turtlewing away.

"NOT MY MATE!" screamed Swiftstorm, and ran after them.

Hawkfrost and Mistystar chased after Shadowheart, in attempt to get their daughter back.

Bluestar ran after them in attempt to save Tei-Tei and Icepool because she isn't right in the head.

Shadowheart attempted to blow up Swiftwing, but failed. She managed to blow up Hawkfrost and Bluestar, but since they're already dead...

Shadowheart blew up Mistystar, but since she's leader...

Shadowheart failed to blow anyone up.

"LIONBLAZE, YOU GIVE ME BACK MY CHAPSTICK!" screamed Goldenwing, running after Lionblaze, who had stolen her Chapstick again, and was spanking him with a baseball bat.

"OKAY, OKAY, HERE'S YOUR STUPID CHAPSTICK!" screamed Lionblaze, flinging it at her.

Goldenwing's eyes turned rabid. "MY CHAPSTICK IS NOT STUPID! IT'S SMARTER THAN YOU!" she began to spank Lionblaze really hard.

"Almost anything is smarter than Lionblaze." Cinderheart rolled her eyes.

"WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!" sobbed Lionblaze.

"You're dumb."

"WHAA!" Lionblaze ran to Leafpool. "Mommy, Cinderheart's bullying me!"

Leafpool was kissing Crowfeather. "I don't care." she mewed lamely, and went back to kissing Crowfeather.

"YOU'RE PATHETIC!" screamed Lionblaze, then went to Squirrelflight. "Foster Mommy, Cinderheart's bullying me!"

Squirrelflight just ran away, and began to fly.

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF STARCLAN GOES ON IN THIS DEMENTED WORLD!?" Lionblaze sobbed.

"Things." Brackenfur mewed wisely.

"Dude, that sounded wrong." Lionblaze mewed.

"Yeah... oops."

* * *

**One more thing: RandomClan's still accepting! *Nudge, nudge***


	53. Torturing Whitestreak!

**Um... RandomClan isn't this story. It's a forum...**

* * *

"PIZZA PARTY!" screamed Bramblestar.

"YAY!" the cats cheered.

Goldenwing sighed. "I don't like pizza."

"YOU WHAT?!" screamed the cats.

"I don't like pizza! You got a problem with that?" Goldenwing struck a ninja pose, bat in hand.

Lionblaze whimpered. "No, no, no, no, no..."

"Good." Goldenwing put the bat down.

"There's no problem. We can order Goldenwing chicken fingers or something!" Fernlight mewed.

Bramblestar growled. "IT'S CALLED A "PIZZA PARTY" FOR A REASON, SISTAH!" he screamed.

Fernlight used her water powers and drowned him.

"YAY!" the cats began to dance. "BRAMBLESTAR'S DEAD!"

Bramblestar reappeared. "I'm not dead!" he hissed.

"BOO!" screamed the cats.

"IDEA!" screamed Goldenwing.

"What?"

"LIONBLAZE CAN GO DIE IN A HOLE!"

"Absolutely not!" growled Lionblaze.

Cinderheart walked up to him and slapped him.

"OW!" Lionblaze groaned. "What was that for?"

"You're stupid, so I'm breaking up with you." she walked away.

"Well, then..." Lionblaze mewed. He walked over to Goldenwing's Chapstick. "Will you be my mate?" he asked.

"No way, dude." the Chapstick slapped him, and walked away.

The 1D-Hater club, who had some new recruits named Angelhalo and Shiningleaf, were crowded around Whitestreak. "Listen to this!" Shiningleaf ordered, handing him an iPod.

"Kay." Whitestreak shrugged, and plugged in the earphones. "NO!" he screamed. "NOT ONE DIRECTION!" he tried to pull out the headphones.

Fernlight cackled evilly. "They're glued to your ears!"

Whitestreak began to sob.

"Haha!" the she-cats collapsed onto the ground, laughing.

* * *

"ATTENTION, KITTIES! WE ARE GOING TO A CARNIVAL!" Bramblestar screamed. "TO THE LIMO!"

"Yay!" the cats cheered, running to the limo. WindClan, StarClan RichClan, RiverClan, and ShadowClan was there.

"FOR THE LAST TIME, THIS IS THUNDERCLAN'S LIMO!" roared Bramblestar.

"Rowanclaw's driving!" Blackstar smiled.

"Welcome aboard!" Bramblestar mewed.

"TO THE CARNIVAL, JAMES!" Blackstar yowled.

Rowanclaw crossed his arms. "No."

"HE'S NOT DRIVING!" screamed Bramblestar.

The other Clans had to walk.

* * *

"THIS IS SO FUN!" screamed NumNumkit, raiding a catmint stand.

"NUM NUMS!" the cats stuffed their faces with catmint, except for Jaystorm and Lavenderbreeze.

"WHEE!" they began bouncing off the walls.

Lavenderbreeze and Jaystorm walked away to do some sane-cat things. But who knows what those are, because nobody does those things anymore.

"YAY!" screamed Luckykit. He had won a giant purple teddy bear.

"Ooh, can you win me something?" asked Bramblestar. "I never win anything! The games are rigged!"

"I will, but it'll cost you!" Luckykit mewed.

"Fine." Bramblestar handed him a bag of catmint. "Good." Luckykit ate it, played a game, and won Bramblestar a giant blue-furred dog.

"A DOG!" screamed Bramblestar. "THE CAT'S SWORN ENEMY!" he attacked it and ripped it to shreds.

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Ferncloud. "I HAVE HAD ANOTHER KIT! HER NAME IS FOXKIT!" A pretty ginger she-cat with green eyes stepped out from behind Ferncloud.

"You're hot!" Redkit (Roseheart's kit) drooled.

"WE'RE TOO YOUNG!" she screamed, smacking him.

"Okay. When we're apprentices, will you marry me?"

"Maybe."

"KK!"

The cats went on the teacups and got sick and vomited.

"PIE EATING CONTEST!" screamed Bramblestar.

"I don't like pie." Goldenwing mewed.

"WHAT DO YOU LIKE?!" screamed Lionblaze.

"SPANKING YOU!" Goldenwing took out her bat and began to spank Lionblaze.

The participants in the contest were Bramblestar, Jayfeather, Whitestreak, who was still listening to One Direction, Hungryforeverything, and Hungryfornothing.

"BEGIN!" screamed Squirrelflight, who was the judge.

Hungryforeverything ate his pies in 0.00000000000000000001 seconds. Hungryfornothing ate none of his, because he doesn't eat anything. Jayfeather wound up eating the table because he couldn't see where the pies were. Whitestreak simply ran away, trying to get the headphones off. Bramblestar began eating his pies in slo-mo for no apparent reason.

"Hungryforeverything wins!" Squirrelflight announced, handing him a trophy.

Hungryforeverything ate it.

* * *

"I name you kitties Starpaw, Redpaw, Ashpaw, Silverpaw, Colorpaw, Puzzlepaw, and Foxpaw!" Bramblestar mewed.

"Be my mate now!" Redpaw begged.

"All right." Foxpaw mewed. And so they had a wedding, and then Jayfeather screamed, "I NEED A TESTER FOR MY NEW CREATION!" he grabbed the first cat he felt. "FOXPAW, YOU SHALL BE THE TEST SUBJECT!" he dragged Foxpaw into his lab.

There were a couple of explosions, blasts of light, and the croaking of frogs, and Foxpaw ran out of the den. "HELP ME!" he screamed.

"Wait... he?" Starpaw mewed.

"JAYFEATHER, WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY MATE?!" roared Redpaw.

"Um, I think I turned her into a tom..." Jayfeather muttered. "I kind of had her test the wrong thing..."

Redpaw attacked Jayfeather.


	54. Screaming contests

**RandomClan is a forum. This is "When StarClan gets Bored". So please don't submit cats for RandomClan here (you would be wasting your time). Several people have been saying they want to join RandomClan but have been submitting their cats here. There is no RandomClan in this story. There's ThunderClan, ShadowClan, RichClan, RiverClan, WindClan, StarClan, the Dark Forest, and I may add in SkyClan. RandomClan's the name of my forum that goes along with this story. You**** can use the same cats you submitted here on the forum, though.**

* * *

"WHERE IS JAYFEATHER?!" roared Bramblestar.

"I FELL OFF HIGHLEDGE AGAIN!"

"He never cared." Leafpool sighed. "Remember?"

"It was kinda fun having him yell at me, though." Bramblestar mewed.

"Where's Wolffur?" asked Fernlight.

"They disappeared." Lionblaze mewed eerily.

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Hawkfrost. "I'M GONNA MARRY A TATOR TOT!"

"Why?" asked Lavenderbreeze.

"CUZ I WANT TO!" he held up a tator tot. It had a smiley face on it.

"To the wedding!" Hawkfire clapped her paws and they went to a church.

The Best Man was Bramblestar, the groomsmen were Tigerstar, Brokenstar, Thistleclaw, Tadpole, and an onion ring. The bridesmaids were Fernlight, Moonfeather, Fireflight, a bottle of ketchup, and Scarletleaf. The ring bearer was a mustard packet, and the flower girls were Sleetkit and a french fry.

"The bride is coming! Please stand for a penguin!" someone announced. Wedding music turned on, and the tator tot, who is an immobile being, was carried down the aisle by Shadowheart.

Purdy was the minister, of course, so he babbled on and on about unrelated things for about a year, and then he married them. After that, they had a feast.

"Hey, Tator Tot, do you support the HawkxAsh pairing?" asked Ashfur. "What the..." Fireflight mewed.

The tator tot was silent.

"THAT MEANS YOU SUPPORT THE PAIRING!" roared Ashfur. "UNACCEPTABLE!" he ate it.

"YOU ATE MAH WIFEY!" screamed Hawkfrost, and attacked Ashfur.

"PARTY!" screamed Boogiekit.

"OKAY!" Bramblestar screamed.

"LET'S HAVE A SCREAMING CONTEST!" screamed Screamkit.

"SCREAM!" screamed Bramblestar.

"SCREAM!" screamed Hawkfrost.

"SCREAM!" screamed Loudkit.

"LOUDKIT WINS!" screamed Screamkit.

"Why can't they be sane?" Lavenderbreeze whispered to Jaystorm.

"WHY CAN'T YOU BE INSANE?!" Hawkfire crashed into their chairs. She was being used as a bowling ball.

"Because we don't want to." Jaystorm mewed.

"WELL, YOU SHOULD!" screamed Shiningleaf.

Then the elder chorus began to sing Ke$ha's "Come On" song.

"HIDE THE KITS!" screamed Ferncloud, stuffing them up a tree.

"Why are there trees here?" wondered Brackenfur.

"Because this is the Gathering place, stupid!" Smartkit mewed smartly.

"Okay, then."

"Announcement!" Jayfeather and Wolffur appeared. "We have found the mystical Tribe of Flying Kittehs!"

"And I am their esteemed leader, Chocolate Pie that Tastes so Darn Good!" yowled Chocolate Pie.

"Yes, we know." Bramblestar mewed.

"I AM DUCK THAT FLIES EPICALLY!" Duck that Flies Epically screamed.

"Well, that's new." Bramblestar mewed.

Redpaw and Foxpaw stormed up to Jayfeather. "FIX HIM!" Redpaw screamed.

"You're stuck with him until I can find the antidote. I broke all of my vials yesterday, and I don't remember the formula."

Redpaw then said some very unkind words that made Ferncloud stuff herself up a tree.

* * *

**"**ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Ferncloud. "I HAVE HAD ANOTHER KIT! HIS NAME IS BRAMBLEKIT!"

"THAT'S MY NAME!" whined Bramblestar.

Brambleberry simply ignored them.

Ferncloud rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry, but I have so many kits that I've gotta start naming them after old-timey dudes!"

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING OLD-TIMEY?!" roared Bramblestar.

"YOU!" Ferncloud cried. "Obviously."

Bramblestar attacked Ferncloud.

"OH MY STARCLAN YOU CAN'T HIT A GIRL!" Hollyleaf mewed hysterically. "THAT'S AGAINST THE WARRIOR CODE!"

"Guess what, kitty, Ferncloud's a she-cat, not a queen, and you're mixing up the cats' warrior code and the twolegs' warrior code!" growled Bramblestar, as he continued attacking Ferncloud.

"OH MY STARCLAN I BROKE THE WARRIOR CODE! YOU CAN'T MIX UP DIFFERENT WARRIOR CODES!" Hollyleaf ran around in circles.

Starstar joined her. "HAHA!" she screamed.

"NO CAT MAY SCREAM "HAHA" AT BLACK SHE-CATS NAMED HOLLYLEAF WHILE RUNNING IN CIRCLES! YOU HAVE BROKEN THE WARRIOR CODE!"

"Time to go to court!" Hawkfire clapped her paws.

"While we're at it, I want to accuse Ashfur of murdering my wifey!" Hawkfrost mewed.

"Sure, we can do that, too."

"And the case about Foxpaw being turned into a tom!" Redpaw growled.

"Sure."

They were poofed to a court.

* * *

**Next chapter shall be the court cases! Cliffhanger...**

**I'm going to do a whole chapter on court cases- one cat vs. another! And I'm taking suggestions! If you want to accuse one cat of another thing, send it in! Just fill this out:**

**Accuser:**

**Defendant(s):**

**Reason for being accused:**

**It can be something silly or necessary. Court cases are fun!**


	55. Time to go to court!

**Wow... over 800 reviews. Seriously... you people are incredible!**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Smokepaw: Thanks :)**

**Okay, so this is a court chapter. It has seven different court cases. I plan on making three or four chapters on court cases for da kitties, unless a lot of people suggest some more, then there will be more chapters. You can continue submitting court cases, just fill out the form. But please note, when I make the second court chapter, I will not accept any more court cases.**

**This is the form:**

**Accuser:**

**Defendant:**

**Reason for accusation:**

* * *

**Accuser: Hollyleaf**

**Defendant: Starstar**

**Reason: Starstar broke the Warrior Code**

**Requested by: Me**

"This court is now in session!" yelled Thunderstar.

"NOT YOU!" screamed Hawkfire. He was replaced with Shadowstar.

"First case, Hollyleaf versus Starstar!" Hawkfire announced, and the two she-cats appeared.

"Okay, I don't like uptight rule-followers, so Starstar wins." Shadowstar growled.

"Yay!" Starstar began to dance.

Hollyleaf began to sob. "WHAT ABOUT THE WARRIOR CODE?!" she screamed.

"I don't care. I just don't like you." Shadowstar growled.

"Yay!" Starstar continued to dance, and was now doing the macerana.

Hawkfire rolled her eyes. "You know, you're coming back. I don't know how many cases there are that involve you!"

"DANG IT!" Starstar screamed.

They left.

* * *

**Accuser: Redpaw**

**Defendant: Jayfeather**

**Reason: Jayfeather turned Foxpaw into a tom.**

**Requested by: Me**

"Next, Jayfeather and Redpaw!"

"I HAVE EVIDENCE!" screamed Redpaw. He ran up to Shadowstar. "See, this was Foxpaw a few days ago. And this is her today."

Foxpaw walked in. "I'm a boy." he mewed lamely.

"JAYFEATHER IS GUILTY!" screamed Shadowstar.

"YOUR PUNISHMENT IS THAT YOUR LAB SHALL BE TAKEN AWAY!"

"But how will I be able to fix Foxpaw?" asked Jayfeather.

"Oh, who are you kidding, you wouldn't do that anyways." Shadowstar shoved them out of the room. "NEXT!"

* * *

**Accuser: Hawkfrost**

**Defendant: Ashfur**

**Reason: HE ATE HAWKFROST'S WIFEY!**

**Requested by: Me**

"Hawkfrost and Ashfur!" Hawkfire called.

"HE ATE MAH WIFEY!" wailed Hawkfrost.

"The evidence is overwhelming." Shadowstar mewed boredly. "Ashfur's punishment is a gazillion years in prison."

"YAY!" the cats cheered.

* * *

**Accuser: Swiftstorm and Shadowheart the tom **

**Defendant: Shadowheart the she-cat**

**Reason: Shadowheart the she-cat apparently stole Shadowheart the tom's name.**

**Requested by: Swiftstorm of Forestclan**

"Next up, Shadowheart versus Shadowheart and Swiftstorm!" mewed Hawkfire. "Because Shadowheart the she-cat is being accused of stealing Shadowheart the tom's name!"

"But I was here first!" cried Shadowheart the she-cat.

"How do you know?" Shadowheart the tom made shifty eyes.

"Yes, how do you?" Swiftstorm growled.

"I WAS HERE FIRST, IS THAT CLEAR?!" roared Shadowheart the she-cat.

"No, I was. My warrior name was Shadowheart! YOU STOLE MY NAME!" yelled Shadowstar.

"HOW DO YOU KNOW?!" roared Shadowheart.

"BECAUSE I'M A GAZILLION YEARS OLD!" screamed Shadowstar.

"Oh. That makes sense." mewed the Shadowhearts.

"BOTH OF YOU SHALL BE ARRESTED!"

Shadowheart blew up Shadowstar. But she's already dead, so...

* * *

**Accuser: Bramblestar**

**Defendant: Squirrelflight**

**Reason: Squirrelflight's too annoying**

**Requested by: Roseheart4271**

"Next up, Bramblestar versus Squirrelflight. Bramblestar is accusing Squirrelflight of being too annoying!" Hawkfire mewed.

"Well, then..." mewed Mousewhisker.

"SQUIRRELFLIGHT IS TOO ANNOYING!" screamed Bramblestar.

"I need more evidence," growled Shadowstar.

"I'm not annoying!" Squirrelflight puffed. Bramblestar looked at her.

"Squirrelflight, sweetie, be annoying so you can be arrested!"

"KK!" Squirrelflight mewed.

"Why do cats call me annoying? I don't think I am. What do you think, Shadowstar? I think I'm less annoying than many cats..."

"You're just like Furstar!" mewed Shadowstar. "YOU'RE ARRESTED! POLICE, TAKE HER AWAY!"

The Kitty Police marched in and arrested Squirrelflight.

* * *

**Accuser: Grassstar**

**Defendant: Purdy**

**Reason: telling stories, and singing inappropriate songs.**

"Next up, Grassstar and Purdy!" Hawkfire mewed. "I want to accuse Purdy of being annoying, telling too many stories, and singing inappropriate songs!" growled Grassstar.

"I don't think I'm annoying. But I've had an experience like this before. Have I ever told you 'bout the time when a cat took me to court because I told him too many stories? It started when I was-"

"STOP IT!" Grassstar began running in circles.

"STOP PURDY!" Shadowstar put her paws over her ears.

"I'll sing then." Purdy mewed. "YOU CAN WALK STRAIGHT THROUGH-"

"GUILTY!" she screamed.

The Kitty Police ran in and arrested the old geezer.

* * *

**Accuser: Cinderblaze**

**Defendant: Starstar**

**Reason: Starstar stole Cinderblaze's donuts, and she has a double name**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"Next up, Cinderblaze and Starstar!" mewed Hawkfire.

"I AM ACCUSING STARSTAR OF EATING MY DONUTS AND HAVING A DOUBLE NAME!"

"Evidence." Shadowstar mewed boredly.

"First up, the double-name thing. Here's her birth certificate!" Cinderblaze handed Shadowstar Starstar's birth certificate.

"HOW DID YOU GET AHOLD OF THAT?!" screamed Starstar.

"Um, I stole from you."

"Okay, you're guilty of having a double name and you're guilty of stealing Starstar's birth certificate. Moving on to Starstar stealing the donuts.

"Last night, I had bought donuts from the shop, and this morning, they were gone!" Cinderblaze wailed.

"Do you have security footage?" asked Shadowstar.

"She stole my security footage!" Cinderblaze growled.

"Then what do you have?"

"We can dust the donut box for paw prints!" Cinderblaze mewed hopefully, holding out the donut box.

A bunch of cats dressed in white ran in, with a bunch of tools. Then they dusted the box.

"IT IS NOT STARSTAR'S PAW PRINTS! IT IS CINDERXLION00ISAWESOME!"

"Gasp!" gasped the crowd.

"Oh, in that case, I withdraw my accusation. Cinderxlion00isawesome."

* * *

**So I'm going to try to do seven court cases per chapter. Remember, this will be your last chapter to submit court cases. After this, they will not be accepted. Kay?**


	56. WHAT?

**Please, I repeat, _please _don't submit RandomClan cats here. It's really no use, because there is no RandomClan in this story. It's a forum. So if you're going to sbumit RandomClan cats, do it on the forum. _Please._**

* * *

**Accuser: Goldenwing's Chapstick/Goldenwing**

**Defendant: Lionblaze**

**Reason: Chapped lips/ Chapstick abuse**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"Next up, Lionblaze and Goldenwing's Chapstick!"

"GASP!" the crowd gasped.

"Since when did Chapstick talk?"

"She's always been able to talk! But she's a little shy, so I shall be her orator." Goldenwing stepped into view.

"All right, then. What's the crime Lionblaze has committed against the Chapstick?"

"He has chapped lips. And he also abuses the Chapstick!" screamed Goldenwing.

Shadowstar sighed. "Evidence?"

"No." Goldenwing bit her lip. "Whoops."

"He's guilty."

"Wow..."

* * *

**Accuser: Cinderxlion00isawesome**

**Defendant: Hawkfire**

**Reason: Because**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"Next, we have Hawkfire and Cinderxlion00isawesome." Hawkfire read off a sheet of paper. She threw it into the air. "WHO MADE THIS UP!?" she screamed.

"Me!" Cinderxlion00isawesome skipped by.

"Why is Hawkfire being accused?" asked Shadowstar.

"Because." Cinderxlion00isawesome mewed. "Because, because, because."

"GUILTY!" screamed Hawkfire randomly.

"Yes, you are guilty." Shadowstar growled. "Kitty Police, take her away!"

"No."

"Okay."

* * *

**Accuser: Everyone**

**Defendant: Ferncloud**

**Reason: too many kits**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"Next, we have everybody versus Ferncloud!" Hawkfire returned to reading the paper.

"Why?"

"Ferncloud has too many kits!" growled Starstar.

"No I don't!" growled Ferncloud.

"No she doesn't!" growled her 2,000,345,123,845,438,945,100,256,002,573 kits.

"Wow." Shadowstar stared. "How is this possible?"

"StarClan knows." Dustpelt grumbled.

"I am StarClan, and I don't know!" Shadowstar snapped.

"Right..."

* * *

**Accuser: Hawkfire**

**Defendant: Firestar**

**Reason: Firestar's old and he doesn't like waffles**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"Next up is Firestar and I!" Hawkfire sighed.

"Again, why am I going to court?"

"Um, you're the accuser." Cinderblaze mewed awkwardly.

"Right..."

"And you're accusing Firestar why?" Shadowstar meowed grumpily. "He's old and he doesn't like waffles!" hissed Hawkfire.

"WHAT?!" screamed Shadowstar. She fainted from shock.

An announcer appeared. "Shadowstar has to take a little intermission. In her place, the judge shall be Riverstar!"

"Okay."

"So, tell me, what's the case?" Riverstar asked.

"Firestar doesn't like waffles." Hawkfire growled.

"WHAT?!" screamed Riverstar. He fainted from shock.

The announcer reappeared.

"Riverstar has to take a little intermission. In her place, the judge shall be Windstar!"

Windstar walked out. "Sorry, I wasn't listening. What's the case?"

"Firestar doesn't like waffles."

"WHAT?!" screamed Windstar. She fainted from shock.

The announcer reappeared. "Windstar has to take a little intermission. In her place, the judge shall be Skystar!"

"What's the case?" Skystar mewed.

"Firestar doesn't like waffles."

"WHAT?!" screamed Skystar. He fainted from shock.

The announcer reappeared. "Skystar has to take a little intermission. In her place, the judge shall be Thunderstar!"

Thunderstar sat down. "What's the case?"

"Firestar doesn't like waffles!" Hawkfire snapped.

"Oh, neither do I!" Thunderstar and Firestar high-pawed.

"All right, they're both guilty." Hawkfire made the Kitty Police take them both away.

* * *

**Accuser: Cinderxlion00 the person**

**Defendant: Hollyleaf**

**Reason: not having a mate/ being so warrior-code obsessed**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"Next, we have Cinderxlion00 the person versus Hollyleaf!" mewed Hawkfire. A female twoleg walked into the courtroom.

"OH MY STARCLAN A TWOLEG'S IN THE KITTY COURT! WE MUST FLEE!" Hawkfire screamed.

The cats broke into a panic and ran away.

Kitty Court was shut down for awhile.

"Hey..." Cinderxlion00isawesome and Cinderblaze to Cinderxlion00. "You look just like us! Awesome..."

* * *

**Accuser: Smartkit and Stupidkit**

**Defendant: Freakishlyoldface**

**Reason: Being historically innacurate/ having five syllables in his name**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"Kitty Court has returned! And now we have Smartkit and Stupidkit versus Freakishlyoldface!" mewed Hawkfire.

"We're accusing Freakishlyoldface of having five syllables in his name and being historically inaccurate!" Smartkit mewed.

"Birth certificate!" Shadowstar ordered.

"All right." Freaky handed her his birth certificate.

"Freak-ish-ly-old-face... five syllables it is. Kitty Police, arrest him!" Shadowstar growled.

The Kitty Police arrested him.

* * *

**Accuser: Deafkit**

**Defendant: Smileypaw**

**Reason: Smileypaw smiles too much**

**Requested by: Wethair123**

"Next up, is Deafkit and Smileypaw!" mewed Hawkfire.

"I'm accusing Smileypaw of smiling too much!" Deafkit mewed.

Shadowstar stared at Smileypaw. He smiled at her. She stared at him some more. He smiled at her some more. This continued for a few weeks.

"Guilty."

The Kitty Police took him away.


	57. More court cases!

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Skystep of StormClan: Chucklez-Lives-On ****:)**

**Chococrazygrrl8: 1. No, Jayfeather's lab was taken away. Do you have a problem with that? Roseheart2471 asked for it to be that way. But I don't want anyone to be uncomfortable. 2. It's that Jayfeather disappeared, and Bramblestar wanted Jayfeather to scream at him because he fell off of Highledge. XD**

**Happy Valentine's Day! I'll probably update tommorow, but just in case... speaking of which, I'm gonna take a break from the court cases and do something Valentine's Day-related. PS. I'll be doing several weddings next chapter (on request), so if you want your cat to be flirted with/married/have an announcement that they have a crush on so-and-so, please tell me.**

**Oh, happy Mardi Gras or Carnival, to whoever lives in Louisiana or Quebec or Belgium or Nice or any other place that celebrates it... shoulda said this yesterday...**

* * *

**Accuser: Onestar**

**Defendant: Rootstar**

**Reason: Rootstar took over WindClan and calls Onestar Onewhisker**

**Requested by: Pandamoniam**

"Next, we have Rootstar and... Onewhisker? Why not Onestar?" Hawkfire read off her paper.

"BECAUSE I RULE WINDCLAN!" a metallic green she-cat burst into the courtroom.

"Grr..." Onewhisker stomped into the room.

"Okay, so what's this for?" Shadowstar grumped.

"Rootstar took over my Clan and calls me Onewhisker. Even though I never stepped down as leader." Onewhisker growled.

"How did you take over?" asked Shadowstar.

"I won the popular vote." Rootstar mewed.

"She did!" added all the cats in WindClan.

"Blah." Onewhisker stuck his tongue out.

"Well, then she's the leader. So she has a right to call you Onewhisker."

"Dang." Onewhisker walked away and Rootstar had a party.

* * *

**Accuser: Orphankit**

**Defendant: Chucklez-Lives-On**

**Reason: Chucklez isn't doing any pranks**

**Requested by: Cloudystorm123**

"Next up is Orphankit and Chucklez-Lives-On!" Hawkfire sighed. "What did he do now?"

"HE HASN'T PRANKED ANYONE!" screamed Orphankit, and insane look in her eyes. "THIS PLACE HAS BECOME BORING!"

"I told you!" Chucklez-Lives-On growled. "I did the stuff for the Prank War, so unless we have another one, my pranks will seem out of place!"

"That's pathetic." Orphankit snapped.

"Kitties, take this somewhere else." Shadowstar growled. "This ain't Kits Court."

"You stink." Orphankit used her magical powers to dump a bunch of roses on Shadowstar.

"OUCH! THORNS!"

* * *

**Accusers: Starstar, Cinderxlion00isawesome, and Cinderblaze**

**Defendant: Goldenwing**

**Reason: Um, I'd rather not say.**

**Requested by: Nightsplash**

"Okay, now we have Starstar, Cinderxlion00isawesome, Cinderblaze, and Goldenwing!" Hawkfire announced.

Starstar burst into the room. "GOLDENWING DOESN'T LIKE DONUTTTTSSSSS!"

Everyone died.

But then they came back, because Kitty Court had to continue.

"ARREST HER!" screamed Shadowstar.

The Kitty Police came in and attempted to arrest Goldenwing.

But she used her crazy ninja skills and then ran away.

* * *

**Accuser: Bramblestar**

**Defendant: Jayfeather**

**Reason: Jayfeather stalks Bramblestar**

**Requested by: leturtlewings**

"Now we have Bramblestar and Jayfeather!" Hawkfire announced.

Bramblestar dragged in a grumpy Jayfeather. "Jayfeather's a dream-stalker!" he whined.

"Yes, I think we figured that out awhile ago." Shadowstar grumbled.

"ARREST HIM, THEN!" Bramblestar screamed.

"I would, but I'm too lazy."

"Then I'll do it." Bramblestar raised his voice. "Oh, Kitty Police!" he cooed. A buff-looking Kitty Police member stormed in.

"No cooing allowed." he mewed gruffly, then dragged him away.

"NO!" wailed Bramblestar.

* * *

**Accuser: Yellowfang**

**Defendant: Brokenstar**

**Reason: Brokenstar stole Yellowfang's pizza**

**Requested by: Contrary to Popular Belief**

"Next is Yellowfang and Brokenstar!" announced Hawkfire.

Yellowfang stormed in. "BROKENSTAR STOLE MY PIZZA!"

"You think I care?" Shadowstar hissed. "Brokenstar's my mate!"

Everyone fainted from shock.

"W-why?" Yellowfang wailed. "Why have you gone to the dark side?"

"I was always an evil leader." Shadowstar rubbed her paws together evilly. "Mwa ha ha ha!" she and Brokenstar skipped off into the evil sunset, until Hawkfire dragged her back to finish all the court cases.

* * *

**Accuser: Starstar**

**Defendant: Cinderxlion00isawesome**

**Reason: Cinderxlion00isawesome stole Starstar's donuts**

**Requested by: Bravefeather**

"Now we have Cinderxlion00isawesome and Starstar!" Hawkfire mewed. "These donut rivalries never seem to end..."

"CINDERXLION00ISAWESOME STOLE MY DONUTS!" screamed Starstar. "TO MAKE UP TO CINDERBLAZE FOR STEALING HER DONUTS!"

"That makes sense." Shadowstar shrugged.

"Arrest her, then!"

"I need convincing." Shadowstar mewed. "Hand one over."

"There's no way I'm giving you a donut." Starstar snapped.

Shadowstar then used a long string of profanity that made Ferncloud stuff all the cats up the tree.

* * *

**Accuser: Goldenwing**

**Defendant: Lionblaze**

**Reason: Stole her Chapstick**

**Requested by: Bravefeather**

"And now, Lionblaze and Goldenwing!" Hawkfire mewed. "So many Chapstick problems!"

"LIONBLAZE STOLE MY CHAPSTICK! AGAIN!" Goldenwing growled.

"I though you handled this with your bat." Shadowstar mewed, surprised.

"I do, but since Kitty Court's around, I may as well take advantage of it." Goldenwing shrugged.

"Oh. Lionblaze, you're guilty."


	58. Happy V-Day Kittehs!

**Happy Valentine's Day! This chapter takes a break from court cases, but there'll be some next chapter.**

**Wow... this story is the third-most reviewed story on the warriors fandom! Thank you so much! **

**Why are all of you so impatient? I know what court cases haven't and have been in. I'm doing the cases in the order they were requested, and I'm doing seven per chapter. So please, know I'll get to yours!**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**RubyArtist334: To post chapter 2, you go to "manage stories", found under "publish" (but you must know that O.o), then click on the story, then at the top, there is something that says Content/Chapters and click on it. Then at the top, it should say, "Post new chapter", and click on it. Then name your title and choose your document, then click "post new chapter". Hope this helps!**

* * *

"HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!" cheered Smileypaw happily.

"I HATE LOVE!" roared Shadowheart.

"Then don't look that way." Lionblaze mewed.

"What?" Shadowheart glanced in the direction that Lionblaze was pointing, and saw DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR and Blackstar kissing.

"WAS THAT NECESSARY?!" she snapped at Lionblaze, and leaped on him. "NO!" screamed Lionblaze, writhing around.

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Fireflight. "I AM GETTING MARRIED TO MILKDAPPLE!"

"AND I AM GETTING MARRIED TO GRASSSTAR!" yowled Tigerstar.

"You go through mates quickly, don't you?" Bramblestar sighed.

"I DEMAND TO GET MARRIED TO SOMEONE!" Trollface screamed. Gorgeousleaf patted him on the back. "It's Valentine's Day, so what the heck? I'll marry you!"

"Okay!"

"Triple wedding!" Hawkfire announced. "TO THE CHURCH!" And so there was a triple wedding.

Triple the brides, triple the grooms, triple the bridesmaids... triple the everything!

Shadowheart, Icepool, and Tei-Tei were in dresses, which they ripped off to reveal tuxedos.

"The brides are coming! Please stand!" announced the announcer.

Usher's "OMG" song came on and the brides appeared, riding down the aisle in a convertible. They hopped out of it and then Purdy came out.

He yakked and yakked and yakked and yakked and yakked and yakked and yakked and yakked and yakked... well, you get the idea. And finally, he married them.

After that, they had a big party, and the first dance with the newlyweds involved "Thrift Shop", a taco, a large bottle of Coke, and a stuffed pig.

"I HAVE A CRUSH ON MOONFEATHER!" screamed Lightningstrike.

"I'M A MEDICINE CAT!" she screamed. "WHEN WILL THIS FACT GET INTO YOUR PEA-SIZED BRAINS?!"

"NEVER!" screamed the toms.

"WE MUST HAVE ONE MORE WEDDING!" screamed Angelhalo. "I AM GOING TO GET MARRIED TO GALEKIT!"

"Is that legal?" asked Brackenfur.

"Probably not, but who cares?" Angelhalo mewed.

"OH, AND PEETAHOTNESS AND I!" Katnissprettypaws mewed.

"NO HUNGER GAMES WEDDINGS!" Bellakit whined. "TWILIGHT WEDDINGS!"

"HARRY POTTER WEDDINGS!" screamed Ginnykit.

"NO, PERCY JACKSON WEDDINGS!"

"NO!"

"NO!"

"NO!"

"BLAH!"

"NO MORE WEDDINGS!" screamed Icepool. "THE CUTENESS IS TOO MUCH TO BEAR!" she, Tei-Tei, and Shadowheart died.

But resurrected, cuz they're awesome like that.

"MOONFEATHER, MARRY US!" screamed a horde of toms, running after Moonfeather, who was fleeing the site.

"ALL THE SINGLE LADIES!" Moonfeather screamed, and flew away.

The toms looked around. "MARRY US, FERNLIGHT!"

"NO!" Fernlight yowled. "ALL THE SINGLE LADIES!" she sang, and flew away.

And then there were the honeymoons. Milkdapple and Fireflight went to a place that didn't have Coppercreek or Tenderfoot. Gorgeousleaf and Trollface went to a place without mirrors. And Tigerstar and Grassstar went to the most evil place on earth- Candy Land.

"RICEKIT, MARRY ME!" screamed Tofukit.

"NO!" growled Ricekit.

So after much persuasion, heart-breaking, and begging, they got married.

"AND I HAVE A CRUSH ON SNOWKIT!" announced Deafkit.

"WHAT?!" screamed Snowkit. "I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"

"WHAT?!"

"WHAT?!"

"SHUT UP!" screamed Shadowheart.

"WHAT?!"


	59. Back to the Court Cases!

**Please remember that I'm no longer accepting court cases, and won't be able to use any more.**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Swiftstorm of Forestclan: I thought they were already married... well, I guess they aren't, so when these court cases are done, they'll have their wedding (sorry you have to wait because of my bad guessing...).**

**Oh yeah! QUESTION! Would you prefer that I have short chapters and quick updates, or long chapters and slower updates? Please tell me!**

* * *

**Accuser: Lightningstrike**

**Defendants: Whitestreak and a french fry**

**Reason: Whitestreak and the french fry stole Lightningstrike's Lightning Staff of Epicness**

**Requested by: OoJayfeatheroO**

"Okay, so after our short break, Kitty Court is back with Whitestreak, Lightningstrike, and a french fry!" mewed Hawkfire.

"WHITESTREAK AND A FRENCH FRY STOLE MAH LIGHTNING STAFF OF EPICNESS!" roared Lightningstrike.

Whitestreak sighed. "I was getting tired of all the lightning happening!" growled Whitestreak.

"PROOF!" screamed Lightningstrike.

"My bad." Whitestreak ran away.

"Well, since he's gone, that leaves us with only the french fry to arrest!" the Kitty Police mewed, then dragged the french fry away.

* * *

**Accuser: JackFrostkit**

**Defendant: Pitchblackkit**

**Reason: Pitchblackkit is evil**

**Requested by: Grasstar of WindClan**

"Next, we have JackFrostkit and Pitchblackkit!" Hawkfire mewed.

"I'm accusing Pitchblackkit of being evil!" snapped JackFrostkit.

"With a name like that, I wouldn't be surprised if he was!" grumbled Shadowstar.

"Grr..." Pitchblackkit growled.

"EVILNESS!" screamed Shadowstar. "HE GROWLED AT ME!"

"Wow..." Pitchblackkit sighed. "I just growled."

"EXACTLY! EVILNESS!" Shadowstar had the Kitty Police arrest him.

* * *

**Accuser: Everyone**

**Defendant: Tigerstar**

**Reason: He's evil**

**Requested by: Grasstar of WindClan**

"Next, we have everyone and Tigerstar!" announced Hawkfire.

"TIGERSTAR IS EVIL!" growled Firestar.

"No..." Shadowstar sighed.

"Tigerstar, you're arrested."

"What? What did I do?" Tigerstar protested.

"Let's see... tried to kill Bluestar and Firestar, tried to get Bramblestar and Hawkfrost kill Firestar, killed Firestar, made ShadowClan and ThunderClan fight..." Shadowstar listed everything. It took her a week to say everything.

* * *

**Accuser: Ferncloud**

**Defendant: Tigerstar**

**Reason: He taught Pitchblackkit to be evil**

**Requested by: Grasstar of WindClan**

"Now, Ferncloud and Tigerstar!" Hawkfire meowed.

"I'm accusing Tigerstar of teaching Pitchblackkit to be evil!" growled Ferncloud.

"No surprise there. Guilty."

The Kitty Police arrested him.

* * *

**Accuser: Grassstar**

**Defendant: Jayfeather**

**Reason: Jayfeather was born**

**Requested by: Grasstar of WindClan**

"Okay, now is Grassstar and Jayfeather!"

"I'M ACCUSING JAYFEATHER OF BEING BORN!" screamed Grassstar.

"Well, since he's here, I'm assuming he's been born so... Kitty Police, arrest him." The Kitty Police arrested Jayfeather.

* * *

**Accuser: Nyan Cat**

**Defendants: ThunderClan**

**Reason: ThunderClan ate the last Twinkie**

**Requested by: xXEternalBlossomXx**

"Next, we have Nyan Cat and ThunderClan!" Hawkfire purred.

"I'M ACCUSING THUNDERCLAN OF EATING THE LAST TWINKIE!" yowled Nyan Cat.

"We were just so hungry!" whined Hungryforeverything.

"You just gave us away!" Bramblestar hissed.

"ARREST THEM!" snapped Shadowstar.

And so all of ThunderClan was arrested.

* * *

**Accuser: Stormpaw**

**Defendant: Hawkfire**

**Reason: Hawkfire didn't go on a date with Stormpaw**

**Requested by: Smokepaw**

"Now we have me and Stormpaw..." Hawkfire sighed. "What did I do?"

Stormpaw burst in. "YOU DIDN'T GO ON A DATE WITH ME!" he screamed.

"YOU'RE TOO YOUNG FOR ME!" yowled Hawkfire.

"LOVE HAS NO AGE!"

"But you do." Hawkfire pushed him away.

"You're guilty." growled Shadowstar.

"You can't arrest me." Hawkfire hissed.

"Right."


	60. Court Cases!

**So, what do you prefer? Short chapters but quicker updates? Or long chapters but slower updates? Please tell me in your review!**

**And yes, you can submit cats if you want.**

**ONTO THE CHAPTER!**

**PS. This is the third most reviewed story on the Warriors fandom- is it possible we can make it the first? This only needs about twenty-five more reviews :)**

* * *

******Accuser: Ricekit**

**Defendants: Rice Cakes**

**Reason: The Rice Cakes won't let Ricekit be their leader**

**Requested by: Ricekit**

"Now, for Ricekit and Rice cakes!" mewed Hawkfire. "But aren't Rice Cakes inanimate objects?"

"THE RICE CAKES WILL NOT LET ME BE THEIR LEADER, SO I AM SUING THEM!" roared Ricekit. He ran into the courtroom, pulling a toy wagon full of Rice Cakes.

"Can they even talk? How do you know they've made a decision?" asked Shadowstar.

Ricekit was silent for a moment. "Well, now that I think of it, I've never heard them talk! Ooh, that means I can take over and they can't complain! Mwa ha ha ha!" he ran out.

"WAIT, DUDE, YOU FORGOT YOUR SUBJECTS!" Stupidkit ran after him.

* * *

**Accuser: Tofukit**

**Defendant: Ricekit**

**Reason: Ricekit doesn't like Tofukit, but Tofukit likes him**

**Requested by: Ricekit**

"Okay, now we have Ricekit and Tofukit!" Hawkfire mewed. "Somebody go fetch Ricekit."

Smokepaw mewed, "If I do it, will you go on a date with me?"

"Maybe."

Smokepaw ran after Ricekit and dragged him back. "Will you go on a date with me?"

"No."

"DANG IT!"

"I AM SUING RICEKIT BECAUSE HE DOESN'T LOVE ME!" screamed Tofukit.

"But I love Roseheart!" whined Ricekit. "And now that I'm the leader of the Rice Cakes, I don't have time for a mate!"

"I'M MARRIED!" screamed Roseheart.

"TO ME!" roared Whitestreak.

"Well, I still have the Rice Cakes!" Ricekit growled.

"Where you elected?"

"No, I'm a dictator."

Tigerstar facepawed. "I told you not to announce that!"

"Oopsies." Ricekit smiled innocently.

"You're going to be sued. What do you want, Tofukit?"

"TOFU AND HIS LOVE!"

"Tofu and his love it is." Shadowstar sighed. "You two shall get married."

* * *

**Accuser: Hawkfire**

**Defendant: Lavenderbreeze**

**Reason: Lavenderbreeze is sane**

**Requested by: Guest**

"Well, that's done. Now we have me and Lavenderbreeze!" mewed Hawkfire. "YAY! MY TURN! I ACCUSE LAVENDERBREEZE OF BEING SANE!" she then began singing, "I'M GONNA POP SOME TAGS-"

"HAWKFIRE! THE KITS!" screamed Ferncloud, stuffing them up a tree.

"I don't care anymore, lady. They'll have to listen to this stuff at some point." Hawkfire growled, then she lead the kits in a chorus and sang, "I WEAR YOUR GRANDAD'S CLOTHES-"

"NO!" Ferncloud screamed, and stuffed Hawkfire up a tree.

Lavenderbreeze sighed. "Can we just get this over with?"

"No." Hawkfire mewed from inside the tree. She waited a few hours and then mewed, "Okay, now. LAVENDERBREEZE IS SANE!" she screamed.

"Okay, I'm getting tired of this, so guilty." Shadowstar growled.

* * *

**Accuser: Fernlight**

**Defendant: That Cat**

**Reason: That Cat keeps stalking Fernlight**

**Requested by: Fernlight**

"Now we have Fernlight and That Cat!" Hawkfire mewed.

"That Cat keeps stalking me!" growled Fernlight.

That Cat mewed, "So? I'm a fanboy of you!"

"That's so wrong..." Shadowstar shook her head. "Guilty."

The Kitty Police arrested him.

* * *

**Accuser: Moonfeather**

**Defendant: Bramblestar**

**Reason: Bramblestar is harassing Moonfeather**

**Requested by: Fernlight**

"Now for Moonfeather and Bramblestar!" Hawkfire announced.

Moonfeather burst into the room. "BRAMBLESTAR HAS BEEN HARASSING ME!" she wailed. "Evidence?" Shadowstar mewed boredly.

"Yeah!" Moonfeather tossed her her video camera.

Shadowstar stared at the evidence. "Harassing indeed... Bramblestar, you're guilty."

The Kitty Police took him away.

* * *

**Accuser: Whitestreak**

**Defendants: The One Direction Hater Club**

**Reason: They glued earbuds to his ears and made him listen to One Direction and Justin Bieber for hours**

**Requested by: Fernlight**

"Now for Whitestreak and the 1D Hater Club!" Hawkfire mewed. "Oh, I'm involved in this!"

"THE 1D HATER CLUB GLUED EARBUDS TO MY EARS AND MADE ME LISTEN TO ONE DIRECTION AND JUSTIN BIEBER FOR HOURS!" Whitestreak sobbed. "It took me forever to get them out!"

The One Direction haters burst out laughing.

Fallenwish wiped a tear (of laughter) from her eye. "That was just hilarious!" she laughed.

Hawkfire couldn't stop laughing and got a case of the hiccups.

Fernlight was ROFLing.

Angelhalo and Shiningleaf fell off their seats from laughter.

"Okay, that's more evidence than I need." Shadowstar sighed. "Guilty."

"But they're all pardoned." Hawkfire hissed. "And me."

"Right..."

* * *

**Accuser: Fernlight**

**Defendant: Firestar**

**Reason: Firestar stole Fernlight's macadamia cookies**

**Requested by: Fernlight**

"Okay, now for Fernlight and Firestar!" Hawkfire purred.

Fernlight stopped ROFLing and screamed, "FIRESTAR STOLE MY MACADAMIA COOKIES!"

"How dare you, Firestar?" Shadowstar shook her head. "You NEVER take a girl's macadamia cookies."

"But they looked so good and I was so hungry!" whined Firestar.

"PROOF!" roared Fernlight.

"You just testified against yourself." Shadowstar shook her head. "You idiot. You're guilty."

The Kitty Police arrested Firestar.

* * *

**Remember to review! You can submit cats.**


	61. YAY!

**You people did it! This is the most reviewed story on Warrriors Fanfiction! I seriously had a party with myself yesterday, when I got 949 reviews... thank you coolkat123 for having the 949th review! But of course... I've gotta do more thanking...**

**To Fernlight, Cinderxlion00, Chococrazygrrl8, Contrary to Popular Belief, leturtlewings (fireflight), Wolf that Howls as Eclipse, Nightsplash, and a bunch of others I forgot... but thanks to everyone who reviewed!**

**Reply to Reviews (heehee):**

**ComedyMaster333: I'm sorry! I've seen Gangnam Style being spelled more than one way, so it makes it hard to know which is right...**

**Cinderxlion00: I know! YAY!**

**Bravefeather: Um... when inspiration gets me and I have the urge to work on it... wow. And I left you people on a cliffhanger! *Slaps self* YOU IDIOT! I'll try to work on it.**

**Strikewing: No, I did not mean you. Fallenwish and Jaystorm are not the only kitties who have formed rivalries over sanity :)**

* * *

**Accuser: Fallenwish**

**Defendant: Jaystorm**

**Reason: Being sane**

**Suggested by: Strikewing**

"Now... Fallenwish and Jaystorm!" Hawkfire purred. "Ooh... sibling rivalry!"

"JAYSTORM IS SANE!" growled Fallenwish.

"Hey... this is just like me and Lavenderbreeze!" mewed Hawkfire.

"So what? So is Lavenderbreeze- she's sane" Jaystorm mewed defensively.

"PROOF! PROOF HE STOLE MAH TACO!" roared Fallenwish.

"Lavenderbreeze was arrested for her saneness. And you will be, too." Shadowstar growled.

Jaystorm was arrested.

* * *

**Accuser: Fireleaf**

**Defendant: Tigerstar**

**Reason: Tigerstar stole Fireleaf's pie. Plus, he's evil.**

**Requested by: Moonbeam141 **

"Now for Fireleaf and Tigerstar!" Hawkfire announced.

"Tigerstar stole my pie! Plus, he's evil." Fireleaf sobbed. "I MISS MY PIE!"

"Pie's my thing!" Cinderblaze growled.

"SHE STOLE MY THING!"

"NO, IT'S MY THING!" DA PIE roared. "I WAS HERE BEFORE ANY OF YOU!"

"Okay, Tigerstar's arrested for being evil, Fireleaf's arrested for stealing Cinderblaze's thing, and Cinderblaze arrested." Shadowstar rolled her eyes.

"CINDERBLAZE AND DA PIE AREN'T PART OF THIS COURT CASE!" Fireleaf growled. "SAVE THIS FOR LATER... OR NEVER..." she ran away.

"Tigerstar's arrested." Shadowstar growled. The Kitty Police arrested Tigerstar.

* * *

**Accusers: Donutkit and Candykit**

**Defendant: Hungryforeverything**

**Reason: Hungryforeverything ate their candy and donuts**

**Requested by: Maddogjean1**

"Now... Donutkit, Candykit, and Hungryforeverything!" Hawkfire rolled her eyes. "I'm surprised Hungryforeverything hasn't been in more court cases."

"HUNGRYFOREVERYTHING ATE MY DONUTS!" sobbed Candykit.

"HE ATE MY CANDY!" wailed Donutkit.

"Don't you mean, your donuts and your candy? As in, you two got mixed up?" Shadowstar sighed.

Donutkit blinked at her. "No. Why?"

"Oh, never mind." Shadowstar face-pawed.

Hungryforeverything walked in, stuffing his face with donuts and candy.

"See? See what he's eating?" growled Candykit.

"This stuff is so good!" Hungryforeverything purred, and continued eating.

"Guilty."

The Kitty Police arrested him.

* * *

**Accuser: Tangleweed**

**Defendant: Chocolatekit**

**Reason: Chocolatekit glued dirt to Tanglweed's nest.**

**Requested by: BoogieTheKing**

"Now, we have Tangleweed and Chocolatekit!" Hawkfire mewed.

Tangleweed, a grumpy old cat, stormed into the room. A little kit skipped after him. "Chocolatekit glued dirt to my nest." Tangleweed growled.

"EW!" the cats screamed.

"That's disgusting!" groaned Shadowstar. "But since he's a kit, being accused by an older cat, I really can't put him in jail..."

"Gr..."

"But I can put him in Juvie!"

* * *

**Accusers: Ferncloud and Hollyleaf**

**Defendants: Crowfeather and Leafpool**

**Reason: PDA**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"Okay, then... Hollyleaf and Ferncloud versus Leafpool and Crowfeather!" Hawkfire read.

The four stormed into the courtroom.

"What's this about?" Shadowstar growled.

"PDA! LIKE, EVERYWHERE!" Hollyleaf screamed.

"So?" Leafpool mewed, and then began to kiss Crowfeather.

"PDA!" Ferncloud stuffed her kits up a tree.

"IT IS AGAINST THE WARRIOR CODE!" announced Hollyleaf.

"Well, then..." Shadowstar took out the "Warrior Code" rulebook. "What page?"

"Page 334,994,002, line 90." Hollyleaf hissed.

"Well, Hollyleaf's right... but I don't like rule followers, so..." Shadowstar mewed. "Hollyleaf's guilty."

"Leafpool and Crowfeather can still be guilty! I'm here!" Ferncloud mewed.

"You have too many kits and are obsessed with stuffing them up a tree." Shadowstar growled. "That's a crime if I've ever saw one. That's called "kit abuse"."

"Ferncloud! You broke the Warrior Code? HOW DARE YOU?!" screamed Hollyleaf, as she was taken away by the Kitty Police. "I TRUSTED YOU!"

* * *

**Accuser: Scientists**

**Defendant: Rowanclaw**

**Reason: Having no certain gender**

**Requestd by: Cinderxlion00**

"Okay... now... Rowanclaw and scientists!" Hawkfire sighed. "Oh dear..."

"Rowanclaw has no real gender!" announced the scientists.

Rowanclaw sighed. "Blame Erin Hunter!"

"TWOLEGS ARE NOT PART OF KITTY COURT! THEY ARE NOT ALLOWED IN HERE!" growled Shadowstar.

"Right..." Rowanclaw grumbled.

"So we have no choice but to blame Rowanclaw. ARREST HIM!" Shadowstar screamed.

The Kitty Police arrested him.

* * *

**Accuser: Hawkfire**

**Defendant: Whitestreak**

**Reason: Whitestreak's a loser**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"Next is Whitestreak and I!" mewed Hawkfire.

Whitestreak stomped into the room. "Why am I here?"

"Um... cuz I want to do a court case..." Hawkfire mewed.

"About what?" Shadowstar questioned.

"Um... is nothing an answer?"

"No."

"Then, I'm doing it because... Whitestreak... is... um... a loser!" Hawkfire mewed the first thing she came up with.

"Well then..." Shadowstar mewed.

"I OBJECT!" screamed Roseheart. "WHITESTREAK IS EPIC!"

"Okay, then... Whitestreak is epic..." Shadowstar shrugged.

Roseheart purred. "Then I withdraw my objection."


	62. Almost 1,000!

**Sorry I didn't update yesterday...**

**Anyways, I need 8 more reviews and this'll be the first story in the Warriors fandom to have 1,000 reviews! So review, review, review! (I hope I'll have to do more thanking next chapter...) If you're the thousandth reviewer, please point it out when you review!**

**Reply to Reviews (YAY!):**

**Nightsplash: I wish! But there's a story on Harry Potter fanfiction with over 19,000 reviews... I'm just hoping for 1,000 right now.**

**Guest: I can't until all of the court cases are done.**

**Guest: What was that about One Direction? What are they doing in Africa?**

**Yolanda: Why are you raving about One Direction?**

* * *

**Accuser: Hawkfire**

**Defendants: All the toms**

**Reason: They're losers, especially Lionblaze**

**Requested by: Cinderxlion00**

"...Okay, now for the toms and I!" Hawkfire nodded. "Shadowstar, I am accusing the toms of being losers! Especially Lionblaze."

"Well, that's easy to see." Shadowstar nodded.

"I OBJECT!" screamed Lionblaze.

"Lionblaze, you are a loser! You've stooped so low to steal my Chapstick!" mewed Goldenwing.

"That is low." Shadowstar nodded. "Guilty."

* * *

**Accuser: Feathertail**

**Defendant: Crowfeather**

**Reason: He's cheating on Feathertail with Leafpool**

**Requested by: Shadeflower972**

"Now we have Feathertail and Crowfeather!" Hawkfire returned to her announcer job.

"CROWFEATHER CHEATED ON ME WITH LEAFPOOL!" growled Feathertail.

"You were dead though!" whimpered Crowfeather.

"You could've gone to Moonpool or something." Feathertail shrugged.

"I'm not walking to Moonpool every time I want to see you!" Crowfeather protested.

Feathertail burst into tears and ran away. Crowfeather smirked and began kissing Leafpool.

"PDA!" screamed Ferncloud, stuffing her kits up a tree.

* * *

**Accusers: Dustpelt and Firestar**

**Defendant: Ferncloud**

**Reason: She has too many kits**

**Requested by: CandyBunnies**

"Next is Ferncloud, Firestar, and Dustpelt!" announced Hawkfire.

"Ferncloud has too many kits!" growled Firestar.

"She keeps your former Clan running!" Shadowstar retorted.

"She still has too many kits. THERE ISN'T ENOUGH CATMINT TO GO AROUND ANYMORE!" Firestar sank to his knees and sobbed.

"Oh please." Shadowstar rolled his eyes. "You should be guilty for sobbing over catmint."

"BUT YOU CAN'T ARREST ME!" Firestar screamed. "I'M THE MOST POWERFUL LEADER EVER! MWAHAHAHA!" he jumped out a window.

"Nobody is to retrieve him." Shadowstar rolled her eyes.

* * *

**Accusers: Hollyleaf, Jayfeather, and Lionblaze**

**Defendant: Breezepelt**

**Reason: Breezepelt was born**

**Requested by: Contrary to Popular Belief**

"Now... for Breezepelt, Hollyleaf, Jayfeather, and Lionblaze!" Hawkfire purred.

The four stormed into the courtroom.

"BREEZEPELT WAS BORN!" wailed Hollyleaf. "AND IT STATES ON PAGE 9,000,000,321, LINE 63, THAT KITS WITH BLACK PELTS, BORN IN WINDCLAN TO CATS NAMED NIGHTCLOUD AND CROWFEATHER ARE AGAINST THE WARRIOR CODE!"

"That's a mouthful." muttered Shadowstar. "You're right, but since I like evil kitties, he gets out on full pardon."

Breezepelt had a party and the other three fumed.

* * *

**Accuser: Bigkit**

**Defendant: Lionblaze**

**Reason: Lionblaze tried to poke Bigkit**

**Requested by: Gummypuss**

"Well then..." Hawkfire shrugged. "Onto Bigkit and Lionblaze!"

"Lionblaze tried to poke me!" Bigkit sobbed.

"You don't poke kits!" gasped Shadowstar. "Lionblaze, how could you?"

"Bigkit is very pokable." Lionblaze growled defensively.

"EVIDENCE!" Bigkit jumped up and down, pointing a claw at Lionblaze. "HE JUST TESTIFIED AGAINST HIMSELF! GUILTY, GUILTY, GUILTY!"

"Yes. Guilty." Shadowstar growled, and the Kitty Police arrested him.

* * *

**Accuser: Angelhalo**

**Defendant: Gorgeousleaf**

**Reason: Gorgeousleaf stole Angelhalo's Galekit**

**Requested by: FoxfaceFan1**

"Now we have Angelhalo and Gorgeousleaf!" mewed Hawkfire.

"Gorgeousleaf stole my Galekit!" Angelhalo mewed viciously.

"What?" Shadowstar stared at her.

"SEE?!" Angelhalo handed Shadowstar the evidence.

"That's Galekit posing with a cardboard cutout of me in "Pretty Kitty Town"." Gorgeousleaf peered over at the pictures.

"GALEKIT'S TRYING TO CHEAT ON ME?!" Angelhalo sobbed. "NO!"

* * *

**Accuser: Starstar**

**Defendant: Starstar**

**Reason: She feels like accusing herself**

**Requested by: Starstar412**

"Now we have Starstar and Starstar!" Hawkfire announced. "Wait, since when were there two Starstars?"

"Never." Starstar padded in. "I just feel like accusing myself."

"Oh StarClan." Shadowstar sighed as Starstar started her case.

"I am accusing myself of being to epic!" Starstar mewed.

"Yes, yes, you are. Now LEAVE!" Shadowstar growled.

"Touché." Starstar grabbed a donut and walked away.

* * *

**Accuser: Cinderheart**

**Defendant: Lionblaze**

**Reason: He loves too many she-cats**

**Requested by: Roseheart412**

"Now for Cinderheart and Lionblaze!" Hawkfire mewed.

"Lionblaze loves too many she-cats!" Cinderheart hissed. "There's me, Heathertail, Icecloud, Goldenwing, the Chapstick..."

"Hold up." Shadowstar mewed. "Goldenwing?"

"Yeah. There's gotta be some reason he steals her Chapstick. Probably to get her attention."

"SCANDALS!" gasped a gossip magazine reporter, and scribbled down notes and took pictures.

"Guilty." Shadowstar sighed.

* * *

**Remember to review! If you're reading this! Review!**

**Novapaw: I am hypnotizing you twolegs to review!**

**Me: So glad some person (I don't remember who O.o) suggested Novapaw! *Hugs whoever that may be***

**Novapaw and Me: REVIEW!**

**Me: Whoever reviews this chapter gets a shout-out next chapter!**


	63. YAYZ!

**YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY! YOU DID IT! OVER 1,000 REVIEWS! THANK YOU MOONSOUL FOR HAVING THE 999th and 1,000th REVIEW!**

**And of course, thanks to everyone else who reviewed last chapter: Samredlamb7, Fernlight, Guest, Cinderxlion00, Strikewing, BittersweetLilies, leturtlewings, RubyArtist334, Spottedfur of Windclan, Swiftstorm of Forestclan, Shadeflower972, Starstar412, Contrary To Popular Belief, Guest, Smokepaw, I am Sky Daughter of Zeus, Pandamoniam, Nightsplash, LeCat101, MewMewLight271, FaiKugawa, Heterica the Great, CandyBunnies, oOJayfeatherOo, Morning last, Russet, Guest, Wolf that Howls at Eclipse, and Guest! Shout outs...**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Spottedfur of Windclan: Yes, she can do it.**

**Guest: Who do you know? What?**

**Guest: I resurrected Ferncloud cuz I'm awesome like dat.**

**ONTO ZE CHAPTER! *Parties***

**P.S. I took a break from the court chapters. They were kinda driving me insane... and several of the reviewers are getting tired of 'em... how would you feel if I went back to normal chapters, but had a few court cases thrown in?**

* * *

"PARTY!" screamed Bramblestar. They were at a Gathering.

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Ferncloud. "I HAVE HAD MORE KITS!" she stepped aside to reveal four kits. "Their names are Vinekit, Cookiekit, Sushikit, Rainkit, Bramblekit, and Goldenkit!"

"I am a prankster!" Vinekit announced.

Everyone fled.

"I am Daisyfoot!" a pretty she-cat ran onto the Island. "Wait... where is everyone?"

"RIGHT HERE!" screamed the toms, stampeding back onto the island, drooling.

"I am Pitchwing, and this is Raggedfur!" mewed a black she-cat.

"Gr..." Raggedfur growled.

"Geez." someone whispered. "What a grump."

"WE COULD BE BEST FRIENDS!" Jayfeather hugged Raggedfur.

"I am Nemoblizzard!" announced a she-cat. "And Niall Horan shall be my future husband!"

"HOW DARE YOU?!" screamed Hawkfire. "DO NOT MENTION THEY-WHO-MUST-NOT-BE-NAMED!"

"They?" HarryPotterkit wondered. "Don't you mean, "He"?"

"ABSOLUTELY NOT!" Hawkfire growled. The 1D-Haters began sobbing. "FANGIRLS! AND OF ONE DIRECTION, REALLY!"

"DO NOT INSULT MY HUSBAND!" Nemoblizzard growled.

"Oh, shushies." Hawkfire snapped.

"I am Avatarbender!" announced another cat. "And I can control earth, water, fire, and air!"

"All hail Avatarbender!" the cats bowed.

"I am Halflight, the reincarnation of Half Moon!" announced a pretty silver she-cat Jayfeather's eyes turned to hearts.

"MARRY ME!"

"And I am Thistlefur, Lionblaze's mate!" a she-cat announced.

"You're cheating on me? Again?" Cinderheart snarled.

"I guess...?" Lionblaze shrugged. "I don't even know this kitty!"

"I am Mouseclaw, and this is Goldleaf! We shall get married!" a tom announced.

"Well, we're doing weddings later, but party's now." Bramblestar mewed.

"I am Moonpaw!" announced a pretty silver she-cat. "I am a tomboy!"

"KK!" the cats mewed.

"I am Strawberryflame!" a ginger she-cat with big blue eyes purred.

"You're pretty." the toms mewed.

"I have random outbursts."

"You're still pretty." the toms smiled.

"And I am Locaptionz!" mewed a cat who had multi-colored fur and sequins around the eyes.

"Random!" Cinderblaze mewed.

"I am Harmonykit!" sang a she-kit.

"Stop singing!" growled Raggedfur.

"I can't!" sang Harmonykit. "These are my littermates, Icecreamkit and Glitterkit! She can FLLYYYY!"

"Cool." Cinderxlion00isawesome mewed.

"I am Bannafeather, and this is Echofrost! We're friends with Jaystorm and Fallenwish!" mewed a yellow-furred tom with green eyes.

"These are Sunbeam, Songheart, and Silverclaw!" mewed Swiftstorm.

"I'm an amazing singer!" Songheart winked. "My new best friend!" sang Harmonykit.

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" Leafpool screamed. "I have another kit! His name is Flashkit!"

A small black tom with a ginger stripe running down his back appeared behind Leafpool. "Sup!" he mewed.

"You're coming with us!" Shadowheart the she-cat growled. She grabbed Flashkit and ran away. Icepool and Tei-Tei followed. "What's she doing to him?" Leafpool asked.

Bramblestar shrugged. "Probably teaching him how to blow things up."

"NO SHE DOESN'T!" Leafpool ran after them. And then she ran back, Flashkit chasing her, trying to blow her up. "I'M YOUR MOTHER! FLASHKIT, STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!"

"Keep going, Flashkit!" Shadowheart called. "Blow her up and I'll give you your warrior name!" Flashkit blew Leafpool into the air and she landed on top of a tree, too scared to come down.

"Well done!" Shadowheart mewed. "Your name shall be Flashparty!"

Since nobody else wanted to end up like Leafpool, they decided to get on his good side. "ALL HAIL FLASHPARTY!" they screamed, bowing to him.

"Wedding time!" mewed Hawkfire. "Quadruple wedding! Yay!" Positivekit mewed to Flashparty.

Flashparty crossed his arms. "Weddings stink." he mewed grumpily.

"The brides are coming! Please stand!" announced the announcer. Ke$ha's "Come On" song came on, Ferncloud stuffed her kits up a tree, and the three brides, Mapleleaf, Swiftstorm, Thistlefur, and Goldleaf danced down the aisle.

Then the minister came out. Surprisingly enough, it wasn't Purdy. It was Flashparty. He did all the normal wedding stuff, until he made them take their vows. "Do you four toms, Mouseclaw, Lionblaze, DA PIE, and Shadowheart the tom promise to blow your wives up?" he asked.

"We d- wait, WHAT?!" gasped the toms.

"And do you four she-cats, Mapleleaf, Thistlefur, Swiftstorm, and Goldleaf, promise to spank your husbands with nunchucks?" asked Flashparty.

"No." the she-cats snapped. "You may kiss the brides." Flashparty rolled his eyes. "That was lousy."

Instead of kissing, Mapleleaf tried to eat DA PIE.

"Hey, wifey!" DA PIE growled. "Whaddya doin'?"

"Trying to eat you!" Mapleleaf mewed, an insane look in her eyes.

DA PIE ran away, Mapleleaf following him.

"Ooh, I wonder where this'll lead!" Flashparty grabbed his video camera and ran out of the church. Shadowheart, Icepool, and Tei-Tei ran after him.

"And this was our random wedding scene." Bramblestar bowed.


	64. I'm Running Out of Chapter Names!

**Okay, wow. I can't believe how many people were driven crazy from the amount of court cases! (I was too, so don't worry)**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Halflight: *Applauds* a beautiful bunny.**

**RicekitxTofukit: I LOVE MAROON 5. What's the best song from them? I like "One More Night".**

**Grasstar helped write the first part of this chapter. But please let me make this clear. I am looking for suggestions of what to do. I don't want you to write the story for me, or else, what's the point of this being MY story? So if anyone has suggestions after this, please don't make a story to go along with it, or else I won't use it.**

**PS has anyone besides me noticed how quickly the amount of humor/parody stories has risen? **

* * *

"Hum dee dum dee dum." Scourge walked into ThunderClan's camp.

"HEY! INTRUDER! GET OUT OF HERE!" screamed Toothfairykit.

"But I heard you kitties were having cake! I want cake!" Scourge whined.

"How'd he find out?!" wailed Bramblestar, who was swinging on a vine like Tarzan, munching on a piece of cake.

"I'm magical." Scourge mewed.

"Oh. That explains a lot." Bramblestar hit a tree and slid down it.

"So, Toothfairykit, can I have cake?" Scourge asked.

"I suppose... but I want your tooth necklace!" Toothfairykit mewed, dancing around in her pretty tooth fairy dress.

"Fine." Scourge took off his collar and gave it to her. "Now, where's the cake?"

"Oh. That. We finished it all!" Toothfairykit grinned, and flew away. "Mwahahaha!"

Scourge collapsed to the ground and sobbed. "NO! NOT MY COLLAR!"

* * *

"Welcome to... Win a Date with Fernlight!" mewed Moonfeather. "And no, you can not win a date with me!"

Fernlight rolled her eyes. "I'm doing this against my will. Again."

"Five toms have been studying (and stalking) Fernlight for this show- to find out what she likes, dislikes, and information about her!" Moonfeather mewed. "Whoever gets the most right wins! The contestants are That Cat, Lionblaze, who appears to be cheating on his many mates, Bramblestar, Onestar, and Purdy!"

"Oh dear." Fernlight face-pawed.

"So... first question! Purdy, what is Fernlight's birthday?" Moonfeather asked.

"I just came on this show to tell my stories out loud." Purdy began yapping about a totally irrelevant story involving an elephant, a mouse, a deranged clown named Bob, and a Cheeze-it.

"Purdy has been eliminated!" Moonfeather mewed brightly. "SECURITY!"

The show's security crew dragged Purdy away.

"Okay, Bramblestar, who is Fernlight's best friend?" Moonfeather asked.

Bramblestar sighed dreamily. "Me."

"No." Moonfeather sighed.

"Ooh! Ooh!" That Cat raised his paw. "Pick me, pick me!"

"Yes, That Cat?" Moonfeather mewed.

"Gorgeousleaf!" he mewed triumphantly.

"Not any more." Fernlight snorted.

"Moving on!" Moonfeather sighed. "Onestar, what's Fernlight's mother's name and what is her special power?"

"Puppy Dog and has the power to eat mice." Onestar answered proudly.

Moonfeather stared at him. "What?"

"Oops, wrong cat." Onestar mewed.

"I should figure." Moonfeather rolled her eyes. "Yes, That Cat?"

"Her mother's name is Scarletleaf, and her power is to change cats' fur colors."

"Correct."

"I wish it wasn't." Fernlight muttered.

"Now, Lionblaze, how do you spell "Fernlight"?" asked Moonfeather.

"T-H-G-I-L-N-R-E-F." Lionblaze announced.

"Well, aren't you stupid." Moonfeather grumbled. "That Cat."

"F-E-R-N-L-I-G-H-T." "Correct."

This went on for a while, and GASP! That Cat won.

"You have to go on a date with me now!" That Cat cooed to Fernlight.

"Absolutely not." Fernlight flew away.

Then Flashparty, Shadowheart, Icepool, and Tei-Tei came and blew up the stage.

"Isn't this fun." Moonfeather sighed. Her fur was singed and smoke rose from her. Icepool nodded. "It is!"

* * *

**Did anyone else notice that Lionblaze spelled Fernlight's name backwards?**


	65. BloodClan wants Num Nums!

**Only 11 reviews last chapter? Come on, guys, you can do better! XD**

**On with the chapter!**

* * *

"We shall go horseback riding!" yowled Bramblestar.

"YAY! HORSEBACK RIDING!" cheered the cats. They stampeded to the stables, and jumped on the horses.

"Giddyup, horsie!" Bramblestar screamed.

The horse just stood there and ate some grass.

"THIS IS A DUMB HORSE!" Bramblestar screamed. "I WANT A REFUND!"

"You didn't pay!" growled the owner of the stables. "You broke in and jumped on the horses!"

"WELL, I STILL WANT A REFUND!" growled Bramblestar.

"You still have to pay." hissed the manager.

"Well, there's no point in paying, cuz I'll just want a refund!" growled Bramblestar.

The horses then bucked the riders off of them. "WE WANT REFUNDS!" screamed the cats.

"You didn't pay!" groaned the manager.

"We still want refunds." snapped the cats.

"Pay!" ordered the manager.

"NO!" screamed the cats. "We just don't pay and then we just go."

"Whatever." the manager sighed. "Just get out of here."

"FINE!" the cats stomped out.

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Turtlewings. "I'm getting married to Thistleclaw!"

"And I'm getting married to Kaboompow!" announced Hawkscreech.

"MORE WEDDINGS!" Hawkfire screamed.

They were poofed to a church.

The bridesmaids were Icepool, Tei-Tei, Shadowheart the she-cat, Fernlight, Moonfeather, and Scarletleaf. The groomsmen were Whitestreak, Hailstorm, Peetahotness, Solar, Lightningstrike, and Lionblaze. The flower girls were Sleetkit and Sugarkit. And the ringer bearer was Pitchblackkit. Then Pitbull's and Christina Aguliara (or however her last name's spelled) song "Feel this Moment" came on and the brides ran down the aisle.

The minister came out. It was Purdy-back on the job. He rambled on and on for about a year, and finally married them. "You two toms may now lick the brides!" he mewed, and then told a story about a tree, a taco, and Bob the Builder.

Ferncloud stuffed her kits up a tree and the new mates kissed.

* * *

Ricekit stomped into ThunderClan's camp. "I WANT TO TAKE OVER THE CLANS!" he screamed.

Hawkfire rolled her eyes. "I wouldn't think. I'm leader and I'm not giving my power to a kit."

"I shall have the power someday." Ricekit growled. He stomped back out.

* * *

"WE ARE BLOODCLAN, AND WE HAVE COME TO TAKE OVER THE CLANS!" Scourge screamed, leading BloodClan onto the island.

"Dude, you tried that a during the first series. You're seriously not going to try again, are you?" Firestar snorted.

"Fine. Then can we have catmint? We want just want to take over the Clans because we heard you have an abundant supply of Catmint." Scourge mewed.

Two toms hauled a big chest up.

Scourge opened it. "CATMINT!" he sang. "YAY!" he opened his mouth to dig in.

Then Bramblestar pulled it away. "Oh no, we just want to make you jealous." he mewed, and the other Clans ate it.

"HYPERNESS!" screamed Lionblaze. "WHEE!"

"NUM NUMS!" screamed NumNumkit.

"NUM NUMS!" sang the Elder Chorus.

"NUM NUMS!" sang Harmonykit and Songheart.

"CATMINT!" screamed the cats, and then they had a celebration. They danced, partied, and ate catmint.

* * *

Ferncloud walked into the nursery. "Ah, a peaceful day." she sighed. "I didn't have to stuff the kits up a tree once!" then she gasped. "AHH!"

The kits were eating Catmint and partying, listening to innapropriate songs sung by the Elder Chorus and Deejayed by Deafkit.

"WHO STARTED THIS!?" roared Ferncloud.

All the kits pointed at Jackfrostkit. "He did it!"

"JACKFROSTKIT DID IT!" sang the Elder Chorus.

Cutekit shrugged. "I helped, too!" she squeaked in her cute, squeaky voice.

"Aw..." everyone "awwed".

"Okay, since Cutekit helped, no one is in trouble." Ferncloud purred.

Grasstar ran in. "EXCEPT FOR PURDY! I WANT HIM TO GET IN TROUBLE!"

"Purdy did it!" sang the Elder Chorus.

"GRR!" Grasstar attacked Purdy, who began singing "Thrift Shop", and ran away.

* * *

**Grasstar helped write the last part of the chapter. ;)**


	66. Directioners vs Directionators

**Guest: I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY PAGES ARE IN THE WARRIOR CODE! *Cries***

**Moonsoul: My friend wants to give you a virtual hug because you like One Direction and she does, too. But my other friend would like to inform you that Niall is hers. O.o**

**Grasstar of WindClan: Sorry! Changed it...**

* * *

"So, Directionators, how can we spread hate to One Direction?" asked Hawkfire.

The cats shrugged.

"This way!" Orphankit yelled. She whispered something in Hawkfire's ear. She snorted and fell off her seat.

"TO ONE DIRECTION!" screamed Orphankit.

They poofed to the barber shop, where the members were getting their hair cut. "Mwahahaha!" Orphankit laughed evilly, rubbing her paws together. She had disguised herself as a barber. She began to shave the band's heads. And all of the band members had completely shaved heads- except for Harry, who had "Stupid" shaved into his hair.

"HAHAHAHA!" the cats burst out laughing and poofed away.

The _Directioners_ were watching One Direction on TV. Then Gorgeousleaf gasped. "SOME EVIL PERSON SHAVED NIALL'S, LOUIS'S, LIAM'S, AND ZAYNE'S HAIR COMPLETELY OFF AND SHAVED "STUPID" INTO HARRY'S HAIR!"

The she-cats burst into tears. "HOW DARE THEY SHAVE MY FUTURE HUSBAND'S HEAD!" sobbed Nemoblizzard.

"Oh, Louis's precious hair..." Poppyfrost rocked back and forth.

Gorgeousleaf stood up. "THEY SHALL BE AVENGED!" she screamed. She ran out of the room. "Wait... who did it?"

"Probably the Hate Club." Poppyfrost growled.

"GRR!" Gorgeousleaf ran out of the room and to the Directionators lair, the other she-cats following.

"WE KNOW WHAT YOU DID!" roared Nemoblizzard. "NOW YOU SHALL PAY!" she leaped at Fallenwish, who used a picture of Niall to protect herself. "I ATTACKED NIALL!" she wailed. Then she bowed down to the picture. "FORGIVE ME, O GREAT ONE!" Fallenwish rolled her eyes.

Gorgeousleaf growled and leaped on Orphankit. "YOU SHAVED THE BAND'S HEADS!" she screamed.

Orphankit shrugged, and dodged Gorgeousleaf. "So?"

"GRR!" Gorgeousleaf attempted to leap on her again. She failed.

"Ooh, another Orphankit and Gorgeousleaf fight!" Hawkfire purred, and pulled out her phone to tape it.

Orphankit used magical powers to send a gazillion mice at her. She was hidden under a pile of mice.

* * *

That Cat was stalking Fernlight again. But when he turned around, there was a cat standing behind him.

"Who are you?" he asked the cat.

"The stalker of the stalker." the cat mewed.

"That's creepy." That Cat mewed. "What's your name?"

"The Cat." the cat answered.

"Okay, then... why are you stalking me?"

"Because you stalk Fernlight." The Cat mewed.

"But I do it awesomely. And you do it... pathetically."

"You do it pathetically. Fernlight isn't supposed to know that you stalk her, yet she does." "I know that you stalk me."

"Then we're both lousy stalkers."

"This conversation doesn't make any sense."

"Or does it?"

"No."

"Hm... I think it does."

"You're creepy."

"Don't get off-topic."

"I think we already are."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Awkward..."

"Isn't it though?"

"Hm..."

* * *

"ATTENTION ALL KITTIES!" Bramblestar's voice rang out over a loudspeaker. "I AM SEXY AND I KNOW IT! THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION!"

"He's not sexy." Lionblaze puffed out his chest. "But everyone wants a piece of this! Come to me, ladies!"

Nobody came to him.

"Pooey."

Cinderheart padded up to him. "Maybe if you didn't have so many mates and didn't flirt with every she-cat you met, maybe more she-cats would like you!"

"Roar." Lionblaze wiggled his eyebrows.

Cinderheart slapped him and walked away.

* * *

"ATTENTION!" yowled Flashparty. "CUTEKIT AND I ARE GETTING MARRIED!"

"Is that appropriate?" wondered Brackenfur.

"Or legal?" questioned Sorreltail.

"I like living on the edge." Flashparty curled his lip. "You gotta problem with that?'

"No..." Sorreltail backed away.

"Well, since this isn't very appropriate, Cutekit shall get her warrior name. Cutekit, your name is Cutecat." Bramblestar mewed.

"M'kay!" Cutecat mewed.

And then they got married. Purdy was the minister, and he tried to tell some completely irrelevant stories, but Flashparty threatened to blow him up, so he hurried along with the ceremony.

Leafpool and Grasstar were sobbing in the front row.

"My little kit's getting married already!" sobbed Leafpool.

Grasstar was too welled up with emotions to say anything.

...

A month later, Cutecat screamed, "I am expecting kits!" and then she gave birth to them.

"Awkward..." the cats mewed.

"The new Ferncloud, I'm sure." Bramblestar rolled her eyes.

"This is Coconutkit, and Picklekit, Soupkit, Bouncekit, Scamperkit, Ninjakit, Flykit, Evilkit, and Hotkit!" mewed Cutecat.

"More hotness?" sighed Moonfeather.

"HOT KITTY!" screamed the toms.

"She's also barely three seconds old, so... NO." Cutecat mewed.

"DANG IT!"


	67. Potatoes vs Kitties!

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Grasstar of WindClan: Actually, Cutekit is not only Grasstar's kit. Ferncloud has a kit named Cutekit (O.o).**

**Strikewing: So I must glue myself to my computer. XD**

**Guest: That doesn't go with my sense of humor, so it's not happening. Hawkfire's not going to die. Even if Hotkit is her reincarnation. Because that's not Hawkfire.**

**Kitkat4546: Same thing, Gorgeousleaf is not dying.**

**To anyone: Please don't suggest I kill any OCs, wether it be mine or someone else's, unless you want them to resurrect, like I do it. Your suggestion will be ignored. People (including me) take time and effort to create the cats- I'm not going to kill them off.**

**Sorry 'bout that, now on with the chapter. Grasstar helped write the first part of the chapter.**

* * *

"APPRENTICE TIME!" screamed Bramblestar. "Do you, Pitchblackkit, Jackfrostkit, and Toothfairykit, promise to learn the ways of StarClan?"

"Yes." Jackfrostkit and Toothfairykit mewed immediately.

"NEVAH!" Pitchblackkit screamed. He leaped up on Highledge and killed Bramblestar.

Bramblestar came back to life. "Okay, Jackfrostkit and Toothfairykit are apprentices, but Pitchblackkit will stay a kit forever because he killed me!"

"WHAA!" Pitchblackkit wailed, and ran into the nursery.

Ferncloud came in after him, and stuck a pacifier in his mouth.

Pitchblackkit sighed contentedly. "Better."

* * *

"AHH!" screamed Gorgeousleaf. "MUTANT JOB-STEALING POTATOES ARE ATTACKING!"

"We know the drill." Starstar nodded. "READY YOUR MUNCHKINS!"

"Yes, General Starstar!" the cats mewed, pulling out boxes of Munchkin Grenades.

"Don't fire until you see the brown of their skins!" Starstar growled. "We have limited ammo, because SOMEBODY jammed up the manufacturing machine!" she glared at Yellowsnow.

He shrugged. "I'm stupid. I'm bound to do stupid things."

"You have a point." Starstar rolled her eyes.

The potatoes appeared.

"FIRE!"

They threw their Munchkin Grenades, and the enemies turned to mashed potatoes.

Fireflight ran up to one of the potatoes that had not been mashed yet. She stuffed it into a Pokeball (or however you spell it). "YES!" she screamed. "I have caught a Job-Stealing Potato!" she struck a dramatic pose, and victory music played and cameras flashed.

Starstar pouted. "And I guided all the cats to victory! Where's my glory?"

"But she caught a POTATO!" a reporter gasped. "I'm the reason she was able to catch it."

"Oh." they began taking pictures of Starstar.

Cinderblaze ran up to Starstar. "The second wave of potatoes are coming!"

"Oh, the Donut Mines'll get them." Starstar mewed dismissively, and continued to pose for the cameras.

"Okay, then..." Cinderblaze skipped off.

The Donut Mines went off and the next round of potatoes became mashed.

"Heehee." Cinderblaze mewed.

* * *

"ATTENTION!" screamed Maplehsade. "GUESS WHAT I HAVE?!"

"What?" asked Mousewhisker.

"TWOLEG FOOD!"

"Ooh..." the cats "oohed".

"NUM NUMS!" mewed NumNumkit.

"I SHALL EAT IT ALL!" Hungryforeverything ate it.

"NO!" Mapleshade dropped onto her knees and wailed. "NOT MY TWOLEG FOOD! WHAT SHALL I EVER DO WITHOUT IT!?"

"Get some more." Hungryforeverything shrugged. "And feed it to me."

"NEVAH!" Mapleshade screamed. "MY PRECIOUS NUM NUMS!"

"Grr..." growled Hungryforeverything. "Grr..." growled Mapleshade. "You will never see a piece of Twoleg num nums as long as I live!" growled Hungryforeverything. "Because I shall eat it all!"

"No." Mapleshade hissed. "I SHALL EAT IT ALL!"

The two began to fight. "MY NUM NUMS!"

"NO, MINE!"

"MINE!"

"MINE!"

* * *

"So, The Cat, how long have you been stalking me?" That Cat asked.

"Since you started stalking Fernlight." mewed The Cat.

"Cool."

"Isn't it?"

"Ya."

"Cool."

"We're getting off-topic again." That Cat mewed.

"Yeah..."

"We're good at that."

"Heehee."

"Cool..."


	68. Taco Cars, Carnivals, and Giant Pandas

**Other people: I never realized so many people hated One Direction! *Hugs* I have found my people!**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Trev12354: I'm sorry, but I can't give Darkfur powers without you answering the question- everyone else did, so it wouldn't be fair if you didn't answer the question.**

**-If you just can't answer this question (who is Russetfur's father) because you don't want spoilers, then answer this (This goes for everyone who wants powers but not spoilers): Which two toms escort Rusty to ThunderClan? **

**Guest: ANOTHER stalker cat?**

**TO THE CHAPTER!**

* * *

"CARNIVAL TIME!" screamed Bramblestar. "TO THE TACO!"

He had rented a car that looked like a taco. You gotta problem with that?

"YAY!" the cats screamed. "A TACO!" they piled inside.

And the other Clans were there. And the Tribe. There was RichClan, WindClan, RiverClan, SkyClan, ThunderClan ShadowClan, the Tribe of Rushing Water, the Tribe of Flying Kitties, and the newest Clan of all, HotClan. The leader was an extremely sexy she-cat named Perfectstar, and her warriors were all muscular, Channing-Tatum-like toms who could not stop drooling over their leader.

"Would you stop raiding my cars!?" Bramblestar face-pawed.

"Rowanclaw's driving!" Blackstar mewed in a sing-song voice.

"Okay then." Bramblestar shrugged.

Rowanclaw jumped out of the car and fled.

"James is a stinky butler." Blackstar pouted.

"You're driving, or all of the Clans and Tribes except for maybe HotClan are getting out of the Taco Car immediately!" growled Bramblestar.

"But I don't know how to drive!" Blackstar whined.

The cats had to walk. Except for HotClan, of course. Bramblestar and the other toms were drooling over Perfectstar, and the she-cats, except for all the pretty kitties, were drooling over the toms.

And then they arrived at the carnival.

About a year later, the other cats arrived.

"LET'S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!" screamed Bramblestar, then hopped onto the carousel.

"Get your cotton candy here!" Goldenwing called. She had set up a cotton-candy stand.

Lionblaze walked over. "Do you have Chapstick flavor?"

"No. That's not a flavor. Have you ever tried cotton candy?"

"Is it similar to catmint?" Lionblaze asked.

"Find out." Goldenwing stuffed a pawful of cotton candy in his mouth.

Lionblaze swallowed it, and his eyes lit up like Christmas lights. "COTTON CANDY!" he screamed. "MUST. HAVE. MORE!" he leaped into the stand and ate all of the already-made cotton candies. Then ate the cotton candy that was being made. And then he ate the ingredients. And then the machine. And then the stand. "MORE!" he screamed.

Goldenwing pulled out a calculator and began calculating numbers. "Hm..." she mewed, then handed him a receipt. "That'll be 4,349,582,345,671,345,566,993,005,146 dollars and 1 cent."

Lionblaze just ran away screaming, "MUST HAVE MORE COTTON CANDY!"

"YOU STILL NEED TO PAY!" Goldewning ran after him, waving the receipt.

* * *

"LOOKIE!" screamed Rootstar. "I HAVE WONZ A GIANT PANDA!" she was leading a giant panda by the paw, around the carnival.

Lavenderbreeze gasped. "Is that a real panda?"

"Yeah!" Rootstar nodded. "Some suspicious, criminal-looking dude gave him to me even though I lost the game!"

Then the Kitty Police came. "Miss, you're under arrest for having stolen a giant panda."

"No wonder he was criminal-looking." Rootstar muttered. Then she gasped. "I HAVE BEEN FRAMED!"

"Yeah, yeah." the cat growled. "Save it for the judge."

"I WILL NOT SAVE ANYTHING FOR THAT HOOLIGAN!"

"What?" the cat asked.

"HE MURDERED MY FATHER!"

"Huh?"

"HE KISSED MY BABY!"

"I beg your pardon?"

"HE STOLE MY ORANGE JUICE!"

"Forget prison, you belong in the mental asylum!"

"MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU, YOUNG SKYWALKER!" Rootstar randomly pulled out a lightsaber.

The cat backed away. "SHE HAS A WEAPON!" he ran away.

Rootstar put the lightsaber away and took the panda by the hand again. They walked off.

* * *

"I bet that I can hold in barf on more rides than you!" challenged E*Tradekit to Orphankit.

"Fine." Orphankit shrugged. "Where to start?"

E*Tradekit narrowed his eyes. "THE TRAIN."

And so they went onto a little train meant for little kits.

* * *

Meanwhile, all the pretty kitties were in the House of Mirrors.

Peppercloud peered in one mirror. "I look super skinny in this one!" she purred.

Bigkit looked into another mirror. "This one makes my butt look big!" she frowned. The other she-cats snorted, but quickly looked away when Bigkit glared at them.

"This mirror makes me look short!" Fernlight mewed.

"This one makes me look tall!" Moonfeather mewed.

"This one makes me look gorgeous!" Gorgeousleaf mewed.

The she-cats sighed. "We're the pretty she-cats." Perfectstar puffed. "So of course it is. It's probably a normal mirror."

"THIS ONE MAKES ME LOOK UGLY!" roared Angelhalo. "HOW DARE IT!" she attacked the mirror. The she-cats rolled their eyes.

Moonfeather tapped Angelhalo on the shoulder. "Do I need to inject sanity into you?"

"No..." Angelhalo shrunk away.

* * *

Orphankit and E*Tradekit stumbled off the train. Both of them looked woozy.

"Ugh..." E*Tradekit moaned.

"Let's do something easier." Orphankit sighed. "Like THAT!" she pointed at a rollercoaster labeled "Super Dangerous, Super Scary, and Super Barfariffic Ride".

E*Tradekit vomited and stumbled away.

"I WIN!" Orphankit began to dance.

* * *

Darkfur was stealing prizes without playing the games and then running away before anyone could catch him. He stole a One Direction cutout without realizing it. "ICK!" he yowled, and flung it away.

"THERE'S A GAME WHERE YOU CAN WIN ONE DIRECTION PRIZES?!" gasped Nemoblizzard. She ran over to it and hugged the worker. "I LOVE YOU! THANK YOU SO MUCH!"

"One Direction stinks." Shadowheart the she-cat growled, and blew up the stand.

The worker fled.

Nemoblizzard sank to her knees. "NO!" she wailed. "NIALL, I SHALL AVENGE YOU!" she got an insane look in her eyes and ran after Shadowheart.


	69. Directioners vs Directionators AGAIN

**Moonsoul: You are! Smile! *Cameras flash***

**Maddogjean1: Sure!**

**Strikewing: Who wants to avenge a nail? You said "nail" instead of "Niall". XD**

**Halflight: So many names!**

**One more thing before I start the chapter: I'M GONNA POP SOME TAGS, ONLY GOT TWENTY DOLLARS IN MY POCKET! THANK YOU FANFICTION! *Rockstar pose* (Just getting that out there...)**

**Okay, that wasn't really necessary... or was it? *Shifty eyes* Onto the chapter!**

* * *

"Dinnertime!" called Ferncloud to her kits and Dustpelt.

"Yay!" Cutekit bounced to the table, which had a big fancy silver platter with a lid. "What is it, Mommy?"

"You'll see!" Ferncloud winked, and the rest of the family sat down. "Presenting... fried Berrynose!" she whipped off the lid to reveal Berrynose laying on a bed of lettuce.

He began to scream. "HAVE YOU CATS NO RESPECT FOR YOUR KIND?!" he wailed, and jumped off the platter. "THIS IS CANNIBALISM!" he began to run around the room.

The kits screamed. "Mommy, the food is alive!" whimpered Rainbowkit.

"I know, I know..." Ferncloud sighed. "CHASE THE PREY, KITS!"

And so Ferncloud, Dustpelt, and all the kits began chasing Berrynose, waving their forks and knives in the air.

"CANNIBALISM, FOLKS, CANNIBALISM!" Berrynose screamed.

They finally caught him and ate him.

But then he gave them serious indigestion.

"And this, kits, is why we never eat our own kind!" Daisy mewed to her new kits, who she had with Solar.

"That was scary!" whimpered Scaredykit. "It isn't real, right?"

"Of course not." Daisy patted her kit on the head. "Just a book to scare you."

What they didn't realize was that Ferncloud, Dustpelt, and their kits were chasing Berrynose with forks and knives.

"Well then..."

* * *

"And if y-oo-oo, want me too-oo, baby say yeah-e-yeah-e-yeah... AND LET ME KISS YOU!" sang the One Direction lovers, including Berrynose, who was dressed up as Harry Styles (I don't know why, but I see him dressing up as Harry Styles O.o).

"Okay, down to business!" Gorgeousleaf mewed. "Fangirl of the month! The nominees are me, Poppyfrost, Nemoblizzard, and Berrynose! And the winner is..." she grabbed an envelope and took a piece of paper from it. "NEMOBLIZZARD!"

Nemoblizzard gave a fangirl scream, and skipped onto the stage. She was awarded with a plaque, a signed photo with One Direction on it, and a medal. She blew kisses into the crowd. "Thank you! Thank you! I dedicate this win to my future husband, Niall! Love you, Ni-ni!" (What's Niall's nickname? Don't tell me.)

Hawkfire and all of the Directionators burst in. "YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT!" she screamed.

"And to non-fangirl!" Fallenwish added, pulling out her defaced portraits of One Direction. The fangirls (Berrynose IS a fangirl) screamed and ducked, as if Fallenwish had pulled out a gun or something.

"PUT THEM AWAY! PUT THEM AWAY!" Gorgeousleaf screamed hysterically.

"HOW DARE YOU DEFACE NIALL!" roared Nemoblizzard, and attacked Fallenwish.

The Directioners applauded. Poppyfrost wiped a tear from her eye. "A true fangirl."

"DIRECTIONERS, ATTACK!" growled Gorgeousleaf.

The fangirl club attacked the non-fangirl club. The Directionators fought with defaced portraits of One Direction, and the Directioners attacked with good-looking photos. And then Gorgeousleaf decided to put on battle music- One Direction.

The Directionators collapsed onto the floor.

"MY EARS!" screamed Shiningleaf.

"IT BURNS!" wailed Fernlight. They fled.

Then Fallenwish stalked back in. She tossed her defaced portraits at the fangirls. "We'll be back." she promised. "And we shall have our revenge!"

"YOU WISH!" roared Nemoblizzard.

Then the cats took a look at the defaced portraits and began to sob.

"Revenge. A dish best served with defaced portraits of One Direction." Fallenwish winked.

* * *

**Shorter chapter than usual... but I know you guys expect me to update often, so, here's the chapter to hold you over for a longer one! XD**


	70. LALALALALALA! (Totally irrelevant)

**Sorry I haven't updated in two days! I was busy...**

**Reply to Reviews: **

**Pandamoniam: I know, but someone had freaked out because I hadn't updated in A DAY. Me not updating in a DAY? I suppose that's illegal now...**

**Grasstar of WindClan: One, no, I meant Cutekit, Ferncloud's kit. I had changed Cutecat to Grasstar's kit, hope that's KK with you, two, I'll try, three, maybe never, or whenever I get time to write a talent show for the kitties, four, when everyone else's new kitties are. And lastly, I said that I am not accepting script thingys. I'm accepting ideas, but I'm not going to have anyone write the story for me. And lastly, you want me to kill Cutecat? I don't think Flashparty'd be KK with that...**

**Smokepaw: No, it's made up of a she-cat leader and Channing-Tatum-like toms.**

**Acornflight: No problem! The more reviews, the better! Unless it's spam... SPAMMITY SPAM! (I got that off of youtube...)**

* * *

"GATHERING TIME!" screamed Bramblestar. "GRAB YOUR JETPACKS!"

The cats cheered, and grabbed their jetpacks. They flew to the island.

Blackstar and Onestar were in bikinis, singing "Sexy Back".

"Aw, dudes! You didn't tell me it was bikini night!" whined Bramblestar. He looked around wildly. "WHERE IS THAT THING!?" he found a glass case put into the Great Oak, like one of the fire extinguishers, but this said, "EMERGENCY BIKINI, BREAK GLASS". Bramblestar took the baseball bat from Goldenwing, who was trying to spank Lionblaze again, and broke glass. He put on the bikini. "Much better."

"I'M BRINGIN' SEXY BACK, YEAH!" the three supposedly distinguished leaders sang.

Mistystar face-pawed. "Geez." she then shoved the toms out of the tree. She glanced at the deputies. "You're the new leaders."

"YAY! CATMINT! NUM NUMS! NINE LIVES! SELENA BIEBER!" Squirrelflight screamed, and then passed out.

Rowanclaw grinned. "Finally! Blackstar will have to stop calling me James!"

Ashfoot purred, and then killed Onestar for the millionth time.

"On the other hand, I SHALL SINGLE-HANDEDLY RULE THE CLANS!" Mistystar screamed.

"Um, you're forgetting about us." Mayorstar and Perfectstar growled.

"Right." Mistystar slunk away.

* * *

"TONNIIIGHHTTTT, WE ARE YOUNG! SO LET'S SET GRAYSTRIPE'S BUTT ON FIRE, HE CAN BURN BRIGHTERRR, THAN THE SUN WHOA-OOH-WHOAAAA!"

Graystripe hissed. "YOU SHALL DO NO SUCH THING!"

"Or will we?" Bramblestar mewed evilly. He held up a match.

"NO!" Graystripe fled, and the psychotic leader skipped after him.

* * *

"I WANNA SCREAM, AND SHOUT, AND LET IT ALL OUT!" screamed Bramblestar and Squirrelflight. Bramblestar was dressed up as Will. and Squirrelflight was dressed up as Britney Spears. They had decided to do a performance of the song "Scream and Shout" and it was mandatory viewing for all of the Clans.

The cats sighed, and Ferncloud stuffed her kits up a tree.

"THIS IS LOUSY!" roared Whitestreak.

"Yeah!" growled Perfectstar. "I'm going home! Come on, warriors!" she stomped out of the camp, her Channing-Tatum-like toms stomping after her.

"RichClan, to the bank!" Mayorstar flew away, to their camp, which was a bank. ShadowClan stalked off to the deep dark pit they called home and RiverClan went home to their fishies and streams, and WindClan went off to the moors and rabbits.

Bramblestar grinned. "Well, since you kitties are already home, you can't leave!"

"I'd rather live in the pit called ShadowClan than listen to you two!" Sandstorm growled, and stomped away.

"Thanks a lot, Mom!" Squirrelflight called after her.

"You're welcome!" Sandstorm called from the forest.

"I'd rather live wherever WindClan lives than live here!" Lionblaze growled.

"This has to be against the Warrior Code..." grumbled Hollyleaf.

The giant panda whispered something in Rootstar's ear. "THE PANDA DOES NOT LIKE IT!" she screamed.

Bramblestar fell on his knees and sobbed. "NOO! THE PANDA DOES NOT APPROVE!"

Squirrelflight waved a piece of bamboo in front of it. "Could I get you to change your mind?"

"He does not accept bribery." Rootstar mewed. "Especially from cats who drink... ORANGE JUICE."

"What does that have to do with anything?" Squirrelflight asked, confused.

"From cats who kiss my pizza!"

"Huh?"

"FROM A TOM WHO SINGS "SEXY BACK"! BRAMBLEY, DUDE, DO YOU KNOW HOW OLD THAT SONG IS?! IT WAS MADE IN 2006!"

"That's not old. THIS IS!" Bramblestar played Usher's "Yeah" song. "2004, LADY!"

"I don't listen to that." Rootstar mewed, confused.

"But what if you're lying?" Bramblestar mewed mysteriously. He put his face right in front of her's and mewed, "Hm?"

"No."

"EVIDENCE!"

The panda took Goldenwing's baseball bat and handed it to Rootstar. He picked up Bramblestar and threw him at Rootstar. She swung and he flew out of camp. "TOUCHDOWN!" Rootstar cheered.

"No, it's a home run!" Baseballkit mewed.

"WHO CARES?!" Rootstar screamed. "NOT ME!" she took the giant panda's hand and skipped out of the camp.


	71. Chapter something oh I've lost count

**I was busy again yesterday! Sorry! Here's the chapter!**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Acornflight: It's fine that you double-posted the review. I know it didn't show up. I decided to moderate guest reviews because some guests have flamed me and I don't like them showing up. So you're reviews are there, I just haven't approved them. Sorry.**

**Grasstar: It's fine! I just didn't know what it was for. It was funny though.**

**ON WITH THE CHAPTER! WHEE!**

**Sorry for the short chapter, but at least it's funny! ...I hope!**

* * *

"WHEE!" screamed Bramblestar. "TACO FIESTA!"

"BUT WE WANT TO GO TO BURGER KING!" whined the kits.

"NEVAH!" yowled Bramblestar. "WE SHALL GO TO TACO BELL!"

"But what if we don't want to?"

"TOO BAD!" hissed Bramblestar. "I'M THE LEADER AND I MAKE ALL DECISIONS!"

So they went to Taco Bell.

"I WANT DORITOS TACOS!" screamed Bramblestar to the worker.

"No." the worker growled.

"WHY NOT?!" wailed Bramblestar.

"Because I don't want to."

"Grr..." Bramblestar "grred". "TO BURGER KING!" he screamed.

"BUT WE WANT MCDONALDS! wailed the kits.

"BUT YOU WANTED BURGER KING!" hissed Bramblestar.

"BUT NOW WE WANT MCDONALDS! screamed the kits.

"TO BURGER KING!" "Whaa!" whined the kits.

So they went to Burger King.

"Can I have a Whooper?" asked Bramblestar.

"No."

"Why not?"

"I don't feel like serving you."

"You're lazy. TO MCDONALDS!" screamed Bramblestar.

"But we want to go to KFC!" whined the kits.

"WHY CAN'T YOU AGREE WITH ME?!" screamed Bramblestar.

"Cuz we're cool like dat." Swagkit mewed.

* * *

"GORGEOUSLEAF STOLE MAH GALEKIT!" screamed Angelhalo.

Hawkfire sighed. "We've been through this before. I really don't think Gorgeousleaf stole your Galekit."

"But I think he has!" growled Angelhalo.

"I don't. See, Galekit's right over there." Hawkfire glanced over at Galekit. "Kissing Gorgeousleaf."

"ARGH!" screamed Angelhalo. She stomped over to Gorgeousleaf and pulled her away from Galekit. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

"Nothing..." Gorgeousleaf mewed.

"YOU'RE KISSING GALEKIT!" roared Angelhalo. "BUT HE'S MINE! MINE! MINE MINE MINE MINE!"

"WHO SAID?!" Gorgeousleaf growled.

"I GOT HIM FOR CHRISTMAS!" Angelhalo snapped. "MY PRESENT! SO HE'S MINE!"

"I wish this world wasn't so strange." Lavenderbreeze sighed.

"Yeah." Jaystorm groaned.

"TOO BAD!" Hawkfire screamed.

"YAH!" screamed Rootstar. "It's too bad you kissed a mouse! That's not appropriate!" "What?"

"You danced with a leprechaun!"

"Huh?"

"And worst of all." Rootstar narrowed her eyes. "YOU ATE A CHEEZE-IT."

"GASP!" the cats gasped. "It is shocking." Rootstar mewed gravely.

"Who are we talking about again?" asked Hawkfire.

"I really don't know." mewed Rootstar happily.

"ALL I KNOW IS THAT A CHEEZE-IT WAS ILLEGALLY EATEN!"

"This makes no sense."Lavenderbreeze sighed.

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Bramblestar. There was another Gathering. "WE SHALL HAVE A TALENT SHOW!"

"YAY!" screamed the cats. "A TALENT SHOW!"

"So sign up on this paper. Write your name and your talent! For the talent show!" mewed Bramblestar.

"YAY!" screamed the cats.

Bramblestar threw the paper in the crowd. And a pen.

"GIVE ME THE PEN!" screamed Squirrelflight, waving the paper.

"NO, YOU GIVE ME THE PAPER!" growled Grasstar.

"NO!"

"NO!"

"GRR!"

"GIVE ME THE PAPER!"

"NO, GIVE ME THE PEN!"

"AHH!"

Orphankit stole both the pen and paper and began to sign up.

* * *

**Talent show! Yay! Grasstar, I decided to use your idea...**

**Okay, so if you want your kitty(s) to participate, just fill out this form!**

**Name of cat:**

**Talent:**

**Who would be their biggest rival?:**

**Would they team up/ do a duet or something along those lines?:**

**So... yeah! Talent show's next chapter!**


	72. Author's Note: Please read

**Hawkstar requested I keep this chapter, so... I suppose I will. :P**

Once upon a time, there were six Clans and two Tribes. They ate catmint, went crazy, and danced to the macarena. They partied and were random and crazy and had a good time.


	73. Talent show part 1

**Thank you all for your opinions! The winner is... the chapter having two parts!**

**I recently met Victoria Holmes and Tui Sutherland! It was so cool! I MET HALF OF ERIN HUNTER *Dies* YAY!**

**Oh, chapter 71 _is_ the most reviewed chapter in this story! AWESOME! (Me and my reviews... *Hugs them* my babies...)**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Pandamoniam: Wasn't it inspiring? My best piece of work, if I do say so myself.**

**Shimmerstar: Yes, you can pick your cat's powers. The first question is, "who is Russetfur's father?" and if you can't answer that one because you haven't read "Yellowfang's Secret" yet, then answer this: Which two toms escorted Rusty to ThunderClan? You must answer one of the questions for powers.**

**RubyArtist334: My fingers don't hurt when I type. But thank you for your concern. :)**

**Grasstar of WindClan: Um, Moonsoul requested that Nemoblizzard be the host. But since there's two parts, Grasstar can be the host of the second part.**

**Leturtlewings: First of all, thank you! And second of all, Eliminator is a critic group. You know, like LawlClan and Critics United. Except crueler. And the members lack patience and get annoyed really easily. They banned me from their forum. I'm just awesome like that.**

** I am Sky Daughter of Zeus: You'll see ;)**

**Guest: Who's Bramblespot?**

**Hawkstar: Um, why not? I won't delete it though...**

**ONTO THE EXTREMELY LONG TALENT SHOW CHAPTER! WHEE!**

* * *

"TALENT SHOW TIME!" screamed Nemoblizzard, the announcer. "First up, Harmonykit!"

All four DAs were judging on a scale of one to ten.

Harmonykit skipped onstage. "TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR!" she screeched.

"MAKE IT STOP!" DA PIE screamed, and fell off of his chair.

"So?" Harmonykit mewed eagerly. "What do I get?"

"Negative one thousand." DA PIE fainted.

"Is that possible?" Harmonykit wondered.

"No." DA PIE revived and fainted again.

"One." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed. "I'm being nice here."

"One." DA KITTY mewed.

"One." DA EPIC ONE growled, covering his ears.

Harmonykit sighed and slunk off the stage.

"Well, wasn't that a hit!" Nemoblizzard mewed weakly. "Well, next up, we have Fernlight and Moonfeather!"

"We shall be singing Demi Lovato's song, "Heart Attack"!" announced Fernlight.

"Whatever you do shall be perfect!" Bramblestar cooed from the audience.

"I'm not sure if you're judgement can be trusted." called Fernlight.

"Yeah. Because you thought skydiving with no parachute would be fun!" snorted Moonfeather.

The audience laughed.

"No, I'm being serious." Moonfeather told them.

They laughed harder.

"Okay, okay, we're getting too off-topic. Let's sing, sistah!" Fernlight mewed.

"I THINK I'D HAVE A HEART ATTACK AAH-AACK!" they sang.

"BEAUTIFUL!" Bramblestar sobbed, taking out a tissue and blowing his nose loudly.

All the other toms applauded wildly, whooped, whistled, and threw flowers at the two she-cats. The she-cats either shrugged or applauded lightly.

The sisters turned to the judges, awaiting their scores.

"TEN!" screamed DA PIE and DA EPIC ONE, their eyes hearts.

"Should their votes count?" wondered Nemoblizzard. "I mean, they're enchanted by their beauty and all..."

Fernlight shrugged. "Then you need to get replacement judges."

"Where am I going to find replacement judges on such short notice?" wailed Nemoblizzard. "All right, they can stay. But their votes may not fully count. She-cats?"

"Um... eight." DA KITTY shrugged.

"Seven." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR nodded.

"Hm..." Fernlight mewed. "Okay, then. Thank you!" she skipped off, Moonfeather following.

"Okay, then, wasn't that lovely! Now we have Jayfeather!"

Jayfeather stumbled blindly onto the stage. "I shall now blow things up!" he mewed.

"Is that safe?" wondered DA KITTY.

Jayfeather blew up the stage.

The screen went white and Nemoblizzard appeared. "While the repair crew is fixing up the stage, please enjoy these commercials!"

Hollyleaf and Lionblaze appeared, singing "NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM..." and so on. It was an advertisement for Kitty NumNums, ThunderClan's top choice in food since yesterday.

"Okay, we're back!" Nemoblizzard purred.

"We now have Shadeflower!"

"And what shall you be doing?" DA PIE sighed.

"BERNIEING!" screamed Shadeflower. "BERNIE!" she began to do the bernie.

The DAs stared at her, eyes wide, jaws open.

"Well, then..." DA KITTY mewed. "That was... interesting..."

"BERNIE!" DA PIE jumped up on the judge's table and began to do the dance. "I'M GONNA POP SOME TAGS, ONLY GOT TWENTY-"

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR pulled him back into his seat. "You're a judge, not a competitor." she mewed irritably.

DA PIE pouted. "That stinks."

"Can I have my ratings?" Shadeflower asked.

"Sure. That was so shocking you get a seven." DA EPIC ONE mewed. "I don't know what else to say."

"TEN!" screamed DA PIE. "TEN TEN TEN!"

"Eight." DA KITTY mewed.

"Eight." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR shrugged.

"Now we have Lionblaze!" mewed Nemoblizzard as Shadeflower walked off the stage.

"I shall be incredibly stupid!" Lionblaze announced. He fell off the stage.

"Well... if that's what you were striving for, you succeeded." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR wrinkled her nose, repulsed at the golden heap of dumb laying on the ground before her. "But I don't like that. Three."

"Four." DA PIE mewed.

"Five!" DA EPIC ONE mewed.

"Six!" DA KITTY purred.

Lionblaze limped offstage.

"Now we have Goldenkit and Bramblekit!" Nemoblizzard announced.

"I shall play the trombone and Goldenkit'll play the trumpet!" Bramblekit mewed.

"Aw..." purred the cats. "So cute!"

They played several songs. They played like angels.

"YOU PLAYED LIKE ANGELS!" sobbed DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR. "That was beautiful! TEN!"

"I don't like beauty, I like epic things." DA EPIC ONE frowned. "Three."

"Five!" DA PIE nodded. "I'm kinda on DA EPIC ONE's side with this."

"Well, I liked it." DA KITTY mewed. "Nine."

"Thank you!" the kits skipped away.

"Now we've got... Dinokit and Scardeykit!" Nemoblizzard sighed. "Oh no..."

"We shall re-enact scenes from Jurassic Park!" announced Dinokit.

The cats groaned.

"Haven't you done that enough already?" grumbled DA KITTY.

"YOU CAN NEVER HAVE ENOUGH JURASSIC PARK!" screamed Dinokit, and then she began to re-enact with Scaredykit.

"BOO!" screamed the crowd. "WE'VE HAD ENOUGH!"

"Cuz you're a kit, I'll be nice. NEGATIVE ONE MILLION!" screamed DA EPIC ONE.

"Clearly, you losers have no taste in movies!" Dinokit snarled. She stomped off.

"Now for Deafkit!" mewed Nemoblizzard.

Deafkit walked onto the stage. "I shall speak in braille!"

"Hm... interesting..." mewed DA PIE, stroking his chin.

She began to speak (I don't know how to speak braille, so...).

"Wow." DA PIE mewed. "That was incredible! Ten!"

"Epic." DA EPIC ONE purred. "Ten!"

"Stop distributing tens willy-nilly!" DA KITTY growled. "Ten." she looked around sheepishly as the two tom DAs glared at her.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR nodded. "Same."

"Now for Rootstar!" announced Nemoblizzard.

"I shall win games without knowing how to play!" Rootstar mewed. "Now, I need someone who knows how to play mahjong..."

Five hours later, Rootstar waved her hands in the air. "I WIN!"

"How?" asked her opponent, Squirreflight, who knows how to play mahjong. "You don't even know how to play!"

"I WAS RAISED TO WIN!" Rootstar announced, and Mario victory music played. "YAY! TACOS FOR ALL!"

Tacos rained from the sky.

"TEN!" screamed DA EPIC ONE.

"ZERO!" screamed DA PIE. "YOU SHOULD'VE HAD IT RAIN PIE!"

"Seven." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed.

"And eight." DA KITTY mewed.

"THANK YOU LOS ANGELES!" Rootstar skipped away.

"Ain't she something!" Nemoblizzard winked. "Now for Echofrost!"

"I shall go crazy!" Echofrost screamed, stuffing big pawfuls of sugar in her mouth. He eyes grew wide and a silly grin spread over her face. "SUGAR! NUM NUMS!" she began to run around the stage. She ran over to Bramblestar and kissed him. She did the tango with Flashparty. She then walked over to DA PIE. "I want to give you something." she mewed. "Hold out your paw."

"Okay..." DA PIE held out his paw, and Echofrost placed something in his hand and closed his claws over it. He opened his paw. "Thanks for... the stick of gum?"

"I know. It's very touching." Echofrost put a paw over her heart.

"Kay..." DA PIE shrugged. "Eight."

"Seven." DA KITTY and DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed.

"And nine. Because catmint is epic." DA EPIC ONE meowed.

"And now we have PSYCH!" mewed Nemoblizzard. "Wait... who's that?"

"I am PSYCH and PSYCH is I!" a she-cat walked onto the stage. "I shall eat nachos!" Nacho Mountain fell on top of her, and she began to stuff her face. After an hour, she announced, "I'm done!"

DA EPIC ONE wiped a tear from his eye. "Beautiful. TEN!"

"ZERO, CUZ IT WASN'T PIE!" DA PIE screamed.

"It made no sense, so five." DA KITTY mewed.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR nodded.

"Fine." PSYCH walked off.

"Now for the Directioners! We shall be singing "Kiss You"!" Nemoblizzard purred. And music blared, and the Directioners walked onto the stage and began to sing.

Hawkfire's eyes rolled to the back of her head and she died. But then she came back to life, cuz she's invincible. "DIRECTIONATORS, FOLLOW ME!" she ordered.

She leaped up onto the stage and began to sing mockingly, the others following.

"NO!" Berrynose sobbed.

"MY EARS! IT BURNS!" wailed Poppyfrost.

"WE WIN!" Fallenwish screamed. They walked off the stage.

"Okay, then... now for Sushikit and Cookiekit!" sighed Nemoblizzard, going back to her announcement duties.

"We shall make rainbows and cookies appear and annoy Bramblestar!" mewed Sushikit sweetly.

"Oh dear..." Bramblestar face-pawed.

"BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BRAMBLESTAR, CAN WE GO TO TACO BELL?!" screamed Sushikit, making a rainbow appear.

Freakishlyoldface smiled, wandered up to the stage, and captured the rainbow. He walked away.

"NAH NAH NAH NAH BRAMBLESTAR, CAN WE GO TO BURGER KING?!" screamed Cookiekit, making cookies appear.

"NO!" screamed Bramblestar. "STOP ANNOYING ME!"

"TEN!" DA EPIC ONE applauded.

"FIVE CUZ THERE WERE NO PIES!" DA PIE screamed.

DA KITTY AND DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR face-pawed. "Three, because this makes no sense." sighed DA KITTY.

"Thank you!" Sushikit and Cookiekit walked off.

"Now we have Grasstar!" purred Nemoblizzard. She walked off, and Grasstar appeared. "Hello! I'll be singing "Titanium" by David Guetta and Sia!" Grasstar began to sing. "You shoot me down, but I won't fall, I am tita-aaaniummmm!"

When she was finished, the DAs sighed.

"That was awful." sighed DA PIE.

''I'm evil. Do you want to get you?" growled Grasstar. "I have learned a few things from my husband, Tigerstar!"

"OH NO!" screamed DA PIE. He dove under the table. "TEN!"

"I'm not afraid of you." DA EPIC ONE mewed boredly. "ONE!"

"I SHALL GET YOU!" screamed Grasstar. She ran after him. Then she hypnotized him to dance to Gangnam Style.

"Okay, now for Pitchblackkit!" Nemoblizzard snorted.

Pitchblackkit didn't even come onto the stage.

"Where is he?" wondered Nemoblizzard.

"He's not backstage!" called a stage crew worker. Nemoblizzard shrugged.

"Then we'll skip him."

And then there was a scream, and Pitchblackkit popped out from the audience. "My talent is scaring people!" he mewed sweetly.

"EVILNESS!" screamed DA KITTY. "ONE!"

"ZERO!" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR cried.

"TEN!" DA EPIC ONE screamed. "SCARING CATS IS EPIC!"

"Five." DA PIE shrugged.

"Next up is Purdy!" mewed Nemoblizzard.

Purdy lumbered onto the stage. "I shall tell stories!" he mewed.

"NEXT!" screamed DA PIE.

Purdy sighed and walked off.

"Now, we have time for one more act before intermission. We have Jackfrostpaw and Toothfairypaw!" Nemoblizzard hurried offstage.

The two apprentices walked onto the stage. "We shall fly!" Toothfairypaw mewed. They began to fly.

"Ooh..." the cats "oohed".

"TEN!" screamed DA EPIC ONE.

"FLYING IS THE EPICEST THING IN THE WORLD!"

"WHERE ARE THE PIES?!" sobbed DA PIE.

"Pies are bad for your teeth." Toothfairypaw scolded him.

DA PIE sobbed. "ZERO!"

"Seven." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed.

"Nine." DA KITTY shrugged.

Nemoblizzard walked onto the stage. "Well, that's all until intermission." she mewed. "And that's all the time I have. After intermission, Grasstar will be the host!" The cats applauded for her. She bowed and walked off.

* * *

**Told ya it was going to be long!**

**Oh, no more talent show requests are being accepted, so please don't send any in :)**


	74. Talent Show Part 2

**This took a while to write- it's longer than part 1...**

**Reply to reviews:**

**Why was everyone panicking when their cat(s) weren't put in "Talent Show Part 1"? I said there would be another chapter!**

**Shadestriker: Yes, I know what Braille is. But that was requested, and since when has this story's intention be to make sense? XD**

**Moonsnow: I liked it, but I said I wasn't taking those types of things. Sorry...**

**Leturtlewings: 2 chapters... sorry...**

**Chococrazygrrl8: ...A story? In my honor? Wow... thank you! So, my cat... I'm gonna do it here because I don't PM. Well, wait, what do you want? Like, a cat form or something? I NEED DETAILS, PLEASE! *Dies***

**And a note, I was serious when I said I wasn't accepting talent show requests after last chapter. I'm sorry, but I shouldn't be going against my own word. :( If only you'd requested it before...**

**ONTO THE CHAPTER, AFTER THIS DISCLAIMER, THAT I FORGET TO DO EVERY TIME!**

**I don't own Warriors, the Hunger Games, talent shows, magic, Fireflies, Sexy Chick, or whatever else. I only own my kitties.**

**NOW FOR THE CHAPTER!**

* * *

"Hello, and welcome back to "Warriors Talent Show"! I'm your new host, Grasstar! Our first act shall be Fattyface!"

Fattyface lumbered onto the stage. "Hello! I shall eat everything in sight!"

"BUT THAT'S MY JOB!" whined Hungryforeverything.

Fattyface stuck his tongue out at him. "TRY TO BEAT ME!"

They ate the whole auditorium. But since eating something that size is impossible, even for them, they threw it back up.

"ZERO!" screamed all of the DAs in unison.

Fattyface pouted and stomped offstage.

"Wasn't that lovely." Grasstar mewed sarcastically. "Next up is Ricekit and Tofukit!"

"This song is dedicated to my EX-LOVE, Roseheart!" Ricekit mewed. Then they began to sing. "YOU COULD'VE HAD MEEEE!"

Tofukit was dressed in a Roseheart costume. "I COULD'VE HAD YOUUUU!"

"MY DEAR, YOU SHALL REGRET YOUR DECISION!" screamed Ricekit.

Roseheart just stared at them. "What is this?"

"I LOVED YOU, BUT YOU DIDN'T LOVE ME, SOOOOOOOO... yeah." Ricekit walked offstage, Tofukit skipping after him.

"Well, then..." Grasstar sighed. "That kit and his broken heart." she snorted. "Now for Toocool!"

A tom walked out.

"And your talent is...?" asked DA PIE.

"Looking awesome." the tom mewed. Toocool just stood there for about an hour and everyone stared at him.

When they were done, DA EPIC ONE applauded. "EPIC!" he screamed. "TEN!"

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT HAD TO DO WITH!" DA PIE screamed. "TEN!"

"What a waste of time." sighed DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR. "Zero."

DA KITTY nodded.

"Kay, bye." Toocool walked off.

"Now for Creepypasta!" mewed Grasstar.

"BOO!" Creepypasta yowled, leaping onstage.

The kits began to cry.

"HOW DARE YOU SCARE MY BABIES!" screamed Ferncloud and Cutecat.

"I just do." Creepypasta mewed creepily.

"You're creepy." Goldenwing commented.

Creepypasta bowed. "Thank you."

"TEN!" screamed DA EPIC ONE. "SCARING CATS IS EPIC!"

"ZERO!" screamed DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR. "I don't like scary things!"

"Five." DA KITTY mewed.

"Seven." DA PIE mewed. "The first number that popped into my head."

"Okay." Creepypasta walked off creepily.

"Now we have Dumbface!" mewed Grasstar.

Dumbface walked onto the stage. "I love Purdy!" she mewed.

Everyone fainted in shock.

"How... could you love... Purdy?" gasped DA PIE. "He's so... Purdy!"

"I still love him." Dumbface mewed defensively. "Okay, we're done here." Grasstar had security drag Dumbface offstage. "Now for the Hunger Games cats and Angelhalo!"

"We shall be singing a parody of PSY's Gangnam Style, called Hunger Games Style!" Angelhalo mewed. "HIT IT!"

"HUNGER GAMES STYLE!" sang the cats.

The DAs stared. "Well then." mewed DA KITTY. "That was... interesting..."

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed. "Seven."

"Same." DA KITTY mewed.

"TEN!" DA PIE yelled. "FOR NO APPARENT REASON!"

"That was interesting, kinda epic..." DA EPIC ONE mewed. "Um... eight."

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I DIDN'T GET ALL TENS!" screamed Angelhalo, throwing an "Angelhalo".

"SECURITY!" Grasstar yowled, running onto the stage. Security dragged Angelhalo away, and the rest of the crew walked off.

"Okay, now for Swiftstorm, Songheart, Starclaw, and Silverclaw!" Grasstar walked off and the four appeared.

"We shall be singing "Fireflies" by Owl City!" Swiftstorm mewed. And so they did.

"Okay, then... ten." DA KITTY mewed.

"Eight." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed.

"SEVEN!" DA EPIC ONE cried.

"Seven." DA PIE shrugged.

"Now we have Lightningstrike!" Grasstar mewed.

Lightningstrike stepped onto the stage. "My talent is looking handsome!" he just stood there. And then someone turned on the fan. He had wind in his fur.

"THAT'S BEAUTIFUL!" screamed DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR and DA KITTY, their eyes hearts. "TEN!"

"Zero." growled DA PIE and DA EPIC ONE.

"Thank you." Lightningstrike mewed and he walked off.

"Now for Trollface!" Grasstar announced.

"My talent is trolling and pranking!" mewed Trollface. He handed DA PIE a pie. "Here."

"YAY!" screamed DA PIE. He stuffed the pie in his mouth. "EW!" he screamed. "THIS TASTES LIKE TOOTHPASTE!"

"MWAHAHAHA!" Trollface laughed. He ran away.

"Okay, then... now for Foreveraloneforever." Grasstar mewed.

"And your talent is?" asked DA KITTY.

"I don't have one." Foreveraloneforver mewed. "Derp."

So they just stood there for a day or so.

DA PIE sighed. "Time to go."

"Okay, now for Vixenclaw!"

"I am a magician!" Vixenclaw skipped onto the stage. "I shall pull a rabbit out of a hat! ALAKAZAM!" she pulled a rabbit out of her hat. Then she ate it.

"I'd like it better if you pulled a pie out of that hat..." DA PIE mewed wistfully.

"I can do that, too." Vixenclaw pulled a pie out of the hat and gave it to DA PIE.

"YAY!" DA PIE screamed, stuffing his face. "TEN TEN TEN!"

"NINE!" DA EPIC ONE screamed.

"Seven." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed.

"Eight." DA KITTY mewed.

"Now for Flashparty!" Grasstar mewed. "My son-in-law!"

"I can kill anyone!" Flashparty mewed. "With anything!"

A bunch of robot cats came out onstage. Flashparty pulled out a dime and began to destroy the robots.

"TEN!" DA EPIC ONE screamed. "THAT WAS EPIC!"

"ZERO!" screamed DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR. "That was repulsive."

DA KITTY nodded.

"Eight." DA PIE shrugged.

"Now we have Ninjakit!" mewed Grasstar.

"My talent is ninja-ness!" Ninjakit yowled, and began going all ninja-crazy. He destroyed the whole stage.

"TEN!" DA EPIC ONE screamed.

"EIGHT!" DA PIE screamed.

"Zero." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR snarled. "Again, repulsive!"

DA KITTY nodded.

"Okay, then..." Grasstar mewed. "Now for Wildthunder!"

"My talent is exploding shtuff!" Wildthunder announced. "Yes, that was said correctly!" she exploded the stage.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR face-pawed. "Zero."

"One." DA KITTY mewed.

"TEN!" screamed DA EPIC ONE. "EXPLODING THINGS IS EPIC!"

"SEVEN FOR NO APPARENT REASON!" DA PIE yowled.

"Okay, now for Turtlewings!" Grasstar mewed.

"This is my talent." Turtlewings took a deep breath. "MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW..." This went on for a year. Turtlewings meowed "meow" ten million times. "So, what's my score?" Turtlewings asked.

"What?" DA PIE jerked awake. "Um, ten... whatever..." he fell asleep again.

"YAY!" Turtlewings skipped off.

"Okay... then..." Grasstar yawned. "Um... we have Leafpelt." she stumbled off.

"Hello, my talent is being invisible!" Leafpelt mewed "Against forest backgrounds!"

"But the background is Taco Bell!" DA PIE called.

"Dang it!" Leafpelt walked off.

"Okay, now for Minecraftstar!" mewed Grasstar.

"Hello! My talent is fixing any gadget! Anyone got any broken iPods or anything?" asked Minecraftstar.

Ninjakit raised his paw. "I kinda broke my new iPhone 5 when I went all ninja-crazy on the stage and Mommy won't get me another one! Can you fix it?" he passed it to Minecraftstar.

In a flurry of paws, making movements that made him seem like he had a billion paws, he handed Ninjakit the fixed iPhone.

"YAY!" Ninjakit yowled.

"TEN!" DA PIE and DA EPIC ONE screamed. "FOR NO APPARENT REASON!"

"Five." DA KITTY mewed boredly.

"Seven." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR shrugged.

"Now for Breezepelt!"

Breezepelt walked onto the stage. "My talent is being annoying!" he announced. "Can I have Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and Hollyleaf come up onto the stage?"

"Fine." Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and Hollyleaf walked onto the stage.

"I hate you three!" Breezepelt whined. "You three strut around like you're so great..."

About two hours later, Breezepelt finished. "What's my score?" he asked.

"Zero." DA KITTY growled. "I wasn't even the one being annoyed, yet you set my fur on edge!"

"She speaks for all of us." DA PIE groaned.

"Gr..." Breezepelt stalked off.

"Now for Leafpool, Squirrelflight, and Sandstorm!" mewed Grasstar.

"HELLO!" screamed Squirrelflight. "OUR TALENT IS... GYMNASTICS!" The three she-cats began cartwheeling, summersaulting, and flipping across the stage.

"THAT'S AMAZING!" screamed DA PIE. "TEN!"

"Eight." DA EPIC ONE shrugged.

"Nine." DA KITTY mewed.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR nodded. "Same."

"YAY!" Squirrelflight, Leafpool, and Sandstorm skipped off.

"Now we have Wolffur!" mewed Grasstar.

"My talent is hypnotizing cats!" Wolffur mewed.

Hollyleaf gasped. "THAT'S AGAINST THE WARRIOR CODE!" Wolffur hypnotized her. "I mean... that's perfectly legal." Hollyleaf mewed dazedly.

"TEN!" screamed all the DAs. "YOU STOPPED HOLLYLEAF'S ANNOYINGNESS!"

Wolffur bowed and walked off.

"Now for Shiningleaf!" Grasstar announced.

Shiningleaf walked out, carrying some balls and a unicycle. "My talent is juggling while riding a unicycle and singing "All Time Low" by The Wanted!"

"I LOVE THAT SONG!" screamed Rootstar.

Everyone stared at her.

"What? Is there a problem that my husband is a tomato?" asked Rootstar.

"What does that have to do with anything?" asked Lavenderbreeze.

Shiningleaf hopped on the unicycle and began to juggle and sing.

Everyone applauded.

"Aren't you talented!" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed. "Nine."

"TEN!" screamed DA EPIC ONE.

"Hm..." DA PIE mewed.

Shiningleaf snuck him a pie.

"TEN!" screamed DA PIE.

"Eight." DA KITTY smiled.

"Thank you!" Shiningleaf skipped off.

"Now for Sandlizard!" mewed Grasstar.

"My talent is training squirrels and mice to do silly things!" Sandlizard mewed. She screamed at a mouse, "PLAY DEAD!"

The mouse died.

"NO, DON'T DIE!" screamed Sandlizard. "PLAY DEAThe mouse stayed dead.

Sandlizard sighed and ate the mouse. "Too bad for him." she shrugged, and skipped off.

"Well then..."

"Now for Flashpaw, Minktooth, Sharkpaw, and Silverstone!" announced Grasstar.

"We're a band!" mewed Flashpaw. "Hit it, guys!" They began to sing and play instruments.

"Eight." DA EPIC ONE shrugged.

"Nine." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed.

"Seven." DA KITTY mewed.

"TEN!" yowled DA PIE. He was still hyped up on pie.

"M'kay!" Flashpaw and the others walked off.

"Now we have Orphankit!" Grasstar announced.

"My talent is karate!" she mewed sweetly, dragging out several wooden boards and a cardboard cutout of Niall.

"Aw, is Niall your karate buddy?" asked Nemoblizzard.

Orphankit chopped the cutout in half.

"NO!" screamed Nemoblizzard. "HOW DARE YOU!" she leaped up onto the stage and chased Orphankit away. Then she cradled the broken pieces of the cutout. "HOW COULD I HAVE LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU? IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME, IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!"

Poppyfrost and Berrynose, pitying their fellow fangirl, dragged another Niall cutout onto the stage and gave it to Nemoblizzard.

"HE HAS COME BACK TO LIFE!" screamed Nemoblizzard. "NIALL IS ALL-POWERFUL!" she hugged the cardboard cutout and skipped off the stage.

"Now we have Albusdumbledorekit!" Grasstar announced. "My talent is arguing and pranking!" the kit mewed.

DA KITTY sighed. "Why?"

"Because I want it to be." Albusdumbledorekit smiled.

"But that's annoying."

"Exactly."

DA KITTY face-pawed. "Go away."

"What if I don't want to?"

"Too bad. Sayonora, hasta la vista, au reviour, bye bye, DO NOT COME BACK AGAIN." DA KITTY hissed.

"Geez." Albusdumbledorekit huffed, and walked off.

"Now we have Bigkit!"

"My talent is being able to fly!" Bigkit jumped off the stage and began to fly.

"TEN!" DA EPIC ONE yowled.

DA PIE nodded. "TEN! I LOVE PIE!"

"This is repetitive. Five." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed.

"Same." DA KITTY nodded.

"Now we have Mapleleaf!" Grasstar mewed.

"My talent is eating pie!" Mapleleaf smiled, and began to stuff her face with pie.

"PIE!" screamed DA PIE. He leaped onto the stage and dove in.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR grabbed DA PIE by the tail and pulled him back to the judge's table.

DA PIE began to sob."ZERO, CUZ I DIDN'T GET ANY PIE!"

"One, because you have no manners!" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR sniffed.

DA KITTY shrugged. "Five."

"Eight." DA EPIC ONE mewed.

"KAY!" Mapleleaf ran off the stage.

"Now for Goldenwing!" mewed Grasstar.

"My talent is applying strawberry Chapstick!" Goldenwing mewed, and took out a mirror and her Chapstick, and began to apply it.

DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR wiped a tear from her eye. "So dainty... TEN!"

"That was boring." DA EPIC ONE pouted. "Zero."

"NO PIE!" DA PIE sobbed. "ZERO!"

"Five." DA KITTY shrugged. "Now we have Bramblestar!" mewed Grasstar.

"I shall be singing to Squirrelflight!" Bramblestar purred. "OH... SQUIRRELFLIGHT MY LOVE, YOU ARE SO PRETTY!"

"BOO!" screamed the cats. "GET OFF THE STAGE!"

Bramblestar pouted and stalked off.

"Now for Ruffledfur!" mewed Bramblestar.

"My talent is being grumpy!" Ruffledfur growled. He glared at the cats.

"Ten, because you succeeded in being grumpy." sighed DA KITTY.

"Zero, cuz I don't like grumpy kitties." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR growled.

"Me too." DA PIE mewed. "I like pie kitties, not grumpy kitties."

DA EPIC ONE nodded.

"Blah." Ruffledfur stalked off.

"Now for Smileypaw!"

"My talent is being the happiest cat around!" mewed Smileypaw. He then began smiling and smiling and smiling and smiling... He smiled for a day and then the DAs dismissed him.

"Now for Ferncloud!" mewed Grasstar.

"My talent is giving birth to kits!" Ferncloud then gave birth to a billion kits.

The DAs just stared, eyes wide, jaws dropped.

"Okay then... you can go..." DA KITTY mewed. Ferncloud and her billion kits walked off. "Now for Smokepaw!" Grasstar mewed.

"My talent is singing!" purred Smokepaw. "Ready? LALALALALALALALA!" "GET OFF THE STAGE!" screamed a cat, and threw a tomato at Smokepaw. He growled and stomped off. "FINE!"

"Next is Hawkscreech and Kaboompow!" Grasstar announced.

"Hello!" Hawkscreech mewed. "We shall be singing a song for you!"

"GET ON WITH IT ALREADY!" screamed Ruffledfur.

"KK!" Kaboompow nodded. "Ready... go!"

"WE ARE SUPER LOUD! YEAH YEAH!" Hawkscreech screeched.

"WE CAN BE HEARD FROM... UM... A PLACE REALLY FAR AWAY!" yowled Kaboompow.

"CUZ WE ARE SUPER AWESOME TOO! AND WE WILL, WE WILL, ROCK-"

"THAT'S ANOTHER SONG, AND THIS IS OURS!"

"POW POW POW! IN YOUR FLUFFY FACES!"

"I LIKE PIE! IT'S BETTER THAN CAKE! PIE POW PURE PIE!"

"I LOVE PIE TOO!" screamed DA PIE and Mapleleaf.

"AAAHHH EEEEE! POW POW PIDDLY POW! WHAT WOW!" screamed Hawkscreech and Kaboompow.

Three of the DAs were speechless.

DA PIE just screamed, "OMG YOU LOVE PIE?! SO DO I! TEN!"

"Kay, that's all we need!" they skipped off.

"Now for Icyclaws!"

"My talent is torturing Berrynose!" the she-cat mewed.

"NO!" Berrynose screamed, and ran away.

"YAY!" screamed DA PIE. "Berrynose is gone! Ten!"

"Kay." Icyclaws shrugged.

All the other DAs were still speechless (Well done Kaboompow and Hawkscreech).

Icyclaws bowed and walked off.

The next cat walked onto the stage. "I'm Daisyfoot!" she mewed.

"You're pretty!" cooed Bramblestar. Daisyfoot began to juggle elephants.

"Whoa..." DA PIE mewed.

The others were still speechless.

"TEN!" screamed DA PIE.

"M'KAY!" Daisyfoot yowled, and skipped off.

"Now... we have Fireleaf!" Fireleaf ran onto the stage and jumped into the air and began flying, and juggled some pies, which she gave to DA PIE, and sang "Thrift Shop".

"TEN!" screamed DA PIE.

DA KITTY banged her head on the table. "REPETITIVE!"

"TEN!" DA EPIC ONE screamed.

"KKZ!" Fireleaf flew away.

"Starstar!" Starstar leaped onto the stage and began to juggle donuts and singing a donut song and so on.

"NO DONUTS SO ONE!" yowled DA PIE.

"Um... five." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR shrugged.

"Eight." DA EPIC ONE shrugged.

"Seven." DA KITTY mewed.

"Now for Angelhalo!"

"I shall tell the stories of all the "Hunger Games" characters deaths!" mewed Angelhalo.

"Good-bye." DA KITTY leaped onto the stage and pushed Angelhalo away.

"Next is Lavendertown!"

"I shall tell some scary stories." Lavendertown mewed.

"HAVE YOU NO RESPECT FOR KITS!?" screamed Ferncloud, stuffing her kits into a tree.

"No." growled Lavendertown. She began to tell the story.

"THAT'S SO SCARY!" screamed Tigerstar, sucking his paw. Everyone stared at him. "What?" he mewed defensively. "Even evil cats get scared."

"SO SCARY YOU DON'T GET A SCORE!" screamed DA KITTY.

"Fine." Lavendertown stalked off.

"Next is Shimmerstar!" mewed Grasstar.

"My talent is tricking toms into doing my bidding!" Shimmerstar smiled.

Bramblestar ran up to Shimmerstar. "I stole the iPhone for you!" he mewed.

Shimmerstar purred. "See?"

"Zero because stealing is wrong." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR and DA KITTY mewed.

"Ten because stealing is epic." DA EPIC ONE mewed.

"Five!" DA PIE announced. "Just to be in the middle of things."

"Now for Wolfheart!"

"I can read the Hunger Games really quickly!" the tom mewed. He read all three real books, all the fanfiction, and guidebooks in 0.000000000000000001 seconds.

"I DON'T BELIEVE IT!" screamed Angelhalo. "WHO GETS HIJACKED IN MOCKINGJAY?!"

"Peeta." Wolfheart mewed.

"OMG HE'S RIGHT!"

"Seven." all the DAs mewed.

"Hm..." Wolfheart walked off.

"Now for Firestorm!" mewed Grasstar.

"I shall eat ice cream!" Firestorm mewed, and began eating ice cream.

"Amazing." DA KITTY mewed boredly. "Two."

"Seven." DA EPIC ONE mewed.

"Two." DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed.

"ZERO CUZ IT WASN'T PIE!" DA PIE screamed.

"Lastly, Silvermoon!"

"I am sane!" a she-cat walked onto the stage.

Everyone but Lavenderbreeze and Jaystorm fainted in shock.

"Okay, then, I guess that's it..." Grasstar mewed.

"NO IT ISN'T!" Bramblestar screamed, running up onto the stage, all the toms following. "WE HAVE SOMETHING TO SING!" They began singing "Sexy Chick" by Akon. "DANG GIRL, THAT'S A SEXY CHICK!" sang the toms.

"Well then..." Grasstar face-pawed.

* * *

**Okay, so normal chapters after this! *Squeal* Next chapter's the 75th! How exciting!**

**Since I made a super long chapter for you, can you review for me? Please? *Puppy dog eyes***


	75. Chapter 75 I Need Ideas!

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Cloudystorm123: No, she is! I made _sure _of it. I re-re-read it to make sure Orphankit was in there! I didn't want a repeat of the Whinykit incident!**

**Acornflight: I'm not sick, just extremely busy. But thanks for your concern :) **

**Guest: Each chapter can take from the shortest time being 15 minutes, to the longest taking about 2 hours.**

* * *

**Chococrazygrrl8: Here's the form: **

**Name: Hawkfire**

**Clan: SunClan**

**Age: 20 moons**

**Rank: warrior (later deputy then leader)**

**Appearance: brown she-cat with darker brown stripes and icy blue eyes**

**Personality: She is very smart and a quick learner. She is patient and good at training apprentices. **

**Mate: Future mate is Smokefang (dark gray tom with green eyes)**

**Kits: Future kits are Sunnykit (tortoiseshell she-cat with a golden dappled tail), Blazingkit (bright ginger tom with green eyes), and Cloudkit (white she-cat with blue eyes)**

**Can I have details on the story or am I supposed to wait? ;)**

* * *

**Silverstrek: Yes, I did meet half the Erin Hunters. It was so cool!**

**Shimmerstar: She will be. And since you read this story, too, along with "The Last Hope Epilogue"- No, I am not. (I've been getting a lot of comments about this lately. Am I really good enough to be compared to Erin Hunter?)**

**75th chapter! **

* * *

"TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK..." screamed Furstar.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" yowled Jaystorm. "YOU'RE DRIVING ME INSANE!"

"Thats my intention!" Furstar mewed sweetly.

"ARGH!" Jaystorm stomped away.

"Heehee." Furstar purred. Then she skipped away.

* * *

"AMERICA RUNS ON DUNKIN!" yowled Rootstar.

"THEY DO?!" cried PSYCH. "I THOUGHT THEY RAN ON TRACKS, OR SOMETHING, NOT COFFEE CUPS!"

"Well, that's not what this commercial says!" mewed Rootstar seriously. She turned on the TV and pointed at the screen. "See?"

"America runs on Dunkin!" the announcer said.

"THAT'S NOT TRUE!" screamed PSYCH. "THEY RUN ON TRACKS AND SIDEWALKS AND STUFF!"

Smartkit rolled his eyes. "It's just the company's slogan! It just means a lot of people in America drink coffee from Dunkin' Donuts!"

"Thanks for ruining it." scoffed Rootstar. She stomped away.

"You're welcome!" Smartkit called after her.

* * *

"Hey, Rootstar, you know that your husband died during the talent show?" growled Onestar.

"TALONSTRIPE DIED?!" gasped Rootstar.

"What? I thought a tomato was your husband!" Onestar mewed.

"I'm random. What am I expected to say?" Rootstar snorted. "Calling a real cat is my husband is normal. But a _tomato..._ now, that ain't normal at all!"

"Right..." Onestar moved away.

* * *

"I challenge you to a running race!" Bramblestar challenged Fastpaw. "We shall race around the world!"

"M'kay!" Fastpaw shrugged.

"READYSETGO!" screamed Bramblestar, and began to walk (WHAT a slowpoke!).

Fastpaw blew past him and raced across the world in 0.0000000000012345 seconds.

Bramblestar finished a year later. He scrambled past the finish line, panting. Fastpaw was waiting for him. "How did you go so fast?" he breathed, grabbing a bucket of water and drinking it all.

"That's part of my name. Fastpaw." the apprentice shrugged. "I'm supposed to be fast."

"Right." Bramblestar sighed.

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Cutecat. "I HAVE HAD MORE KITS!"

"What are their names?" Ferncloud asked excitedly.

"Littlecutekit, Flashkit, Catkit, Partykit, Torturekit, Chainsawkit, Bombkit, and Bulletkit!" Cutecat mewed. The cats jaws dropped and their eyes popped.

"Flashparty came up with Torturekit, Chainsawkit, Bombkit, and Bulletkit." Cutecat mewed. "I came up with the rest."

"Yeah, that makes sense." the cats nodded.

* * *

"GIVE ME A DONUT!" screamed Starstar at Cinderblaze.

"NEVAH!" screamed Cinderblaze, hugging a box of donuts.

"BUT I AM ZE QUEEN OF ALL ZE DONUTS! GIVE ME A DONUT OR I SHALL SEND MY MUNCHKIN WARRIORS AFTER YOU!" screamed Starstar.

"Heehee. Munchkins are small. What will they do? Throw munchkins at me?" Cinderblaze giggled.

Then a bunch of buff toms stomped up to her.

"_These_ are the Munchkins." Starstar purred.

"SEE YA!" Cinderblaze threw the box of donuts at Starstar and fled.

"Mwa hahahaha!" Starstar took one of the donuts and bit into it. "Works every time."

"What if it didn't?" Cinderxlion00isawesome mewed mischievously, popping up behind her. She stole the box of donuts and ran towards Cinderblaze. She tossed the box to her.

"HEY!" screamed Starstar. She stomped over to Cinderblaze. "GIMME THOSE!"

"Cinderxlion00isawesome! Catch!" Cinderblaze tossed the box over Starstar's head to Cinderxlion00isawesome.

"MUNCHKINS, HELP ME!" roared Starstar.

The Munchkin Warriors ran over and tried to catch the two she-cats. So then it turned into a donutball game (Football but with donuts!).

Announcerkit (Ferncloud's kit) began announcing the moves of the game.

"Ooh, Munchkin Warrior Number 1 dives at Cinderblaze, misses! Starstar's chasing after Cinderxlion00isawesome, who has the box! Ooh, that was a close one! So close, Starstar! Cinderxlion00isawesome passes the box to Cinderblaze... now they're playing "Monkey in the Middle" with three of the Munchkin Warriors... oh, and Cinderblaze is off... she's going, going... GONE! TOUCHDOWN!"

"WHEE!" screamed Cinderblaze. She tossed the box into the air and the donuts fell out, raining on her. She began to do Gangnam Style, while stuffing the donuts in her face.

"I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE!" screamed Starstar, and flew away.

* * *

**Sorry for the short chapter, but I've been very busy lately. **

**Tell me, should Ferncloud stop having kits? I don't think so, but, whatever. Tell me what you think! And should I have another contest? (Like the hottest and stuff...)**

**I need ideas, that's also a reason that this is so short...**

**I think the author's notes are longer than the chapter itself! O.o I NEED IDEAS SO HELP ME. (Fernlight, I know you like giving ideas... SAVE ME)**


	76. Two Chapters in a Day! Yay! (It Rhymes!)

**Yay, two chapters in one day! Thank you all for your suggestions! And in the next few chapters, I will do a contest, but as you can see, there is a little argument going on, and it doesn't seem right to be doing it right now. **

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" yowled Dinokit. "I HAVE STOPPED OBSESSING OVER JURASSIC PARK!"

"YAY!" the cats applauded.

"INSTEAD, I'M OBSESSING OVER JAWS!"

"Aw..." whined the cats. Dinokit began reciting a bunch of facts from Jaws.

Squirrelflight covered her ears and began to scream.

"Okay, folks, we must sing as loud as possible to drown out Dinokit's horrendous singing!" Harmonykit whispered to her choir.

"M'kay!" Purdy smiled.

"All right, as we practiced... a-one, a-two, a-one two three four!" half the Elder Chorus began singing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" and half began singing "God Bless America".

The cats stared at them. Even Dinokit stopped reciting to stare at them.

As soon as they finished singing, Harmonykit began to applaud madly. "Well done, well done!" she purred.

"You mean... that was what was supposed to happen?" Lavenderbreeze mewed.

"Oui." Harmonykit mewed seriously.

"Would you prefer to listen to One Direction remixes?" asked Nemoblizzard. "Me and my friend, Desiredwishes, and the fangirl club have been working on some awesome remixes to go along with their latest CD!"

"NO!" screamed Hawkfire. "EVEN THE ELDER CHORUS IS BETTER THAN THEM!"

"She has a point there." Shiningleaf mewed seriously.

The fangirls began to sob. Desiredwishes, Nemoblizzard's BFF and fellow 1D fangirl, stalked over to Shiningleaf and slapped her.

"Oh no you did-n't!" Shiningleaf snapped sassily.

"Oh yes I di-id!" Desirdwishes snapped her claws.

"DIRECTIONERS AND DIRECTIONATORS WAR!" screamed Fallenwish at the top of her lungs. "HATERS, ATTACK!"

"LOVERS, ATTACK!" yowled Nemoblizzard, and they crashed head-first into battle.

Everyone else moved away.

"Awkward..."

* * *

"Line up!" Moonfeather mewed. "Time for everyone to get their shots!"

"NO!" screamed Bramblestar, sucking his paw. "Shots scare me! Mommy, can I have a hug?"

Ruffledfur, who was in line before him, growled, "No. And since when was I your mother?"

"I don't know..." Bramblestar shrugged.

"BUT JUST GIVE ME A HUG!" he began to sob.

"I'LL HUG YOU!" Desiredwishes screamed dramatically. She burst into the room and hugged Bramblestar for no apparent reason. Then she ran off.

"Thank you!" Bramblestar called after her.

"That is one strange she-cat..."

Then Bramblestar walked over to Moonfeather, who was dressed in a nurse's outfit. "Ready for your shot?" she asked cheerily.

"Well, I think I have a fever... can you kiss my forehead to see?" Bramblestar mewed flirtily.

Moonfeather pushed him into the seat, and rubbed his shoulder with a piece of gauze wetted with whatever it is that goes onto your shoulder before a shot. "Hold still. This may pinch a little!" she got out a giant needle and injected it into Bramblestar.

Well, Americans, you've heard about the "shot heard 'round the world", right? Well, the noise Bramblestar made is officially known as "the scream heard all 'round the universe". The scream lasted for eighty-four years, two months, one week, three days, twelve hours, forty-two minutes, nine seconds, and twenty-three milliseconds. Bramblestar holds the world record for the longest and loudest scream from a cat.

All thanks to flirting with Moonfeather.

* * *

The Dark Forest was standing around ThunderClan's camp. And so was Grasstar, who is Tigerstar's wifey, and Shimmerstar, who is Hawkfrost's wifey. They all clutched stuffed animals, and there were piles of them at their paws. "Ready?" Brokenstar growled.

"Ready." the cats whispered.

They began to scream, "STUFFEDCLAN IS ATTACKING!" and threw the stuffed animals into the camp.

Cloudtail ran around in circles. "OH MY STARCLAN STUFFEDCLAN IS ATTACKING STARCLAN SAVE US!" he wailed.

Brightheart gasped. "But I thought you didn't believe in StarClan!"

"DESPERATE TIMES CALL FOR DESPERATE MEASURES!" screamed Cloudtail.

Then Hawkfire appeared. "The Dark Forest, Grasstar, and Shimmerstar are just throwing stuffed animals into the camp. StuffedClan is not attacking."

"Oh." Cloudtail mewed stupidly.

Hawkfire face-pawed.

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Deafkit. "I AM HOLDING A BRAILLE-SPEAKING CLASS! SIGN UP IF YOU WANT TO!"

A lot of cats rushed over to sign up.

"Okay, class is starting!" Deafkit mewed. "First word: ... .. "

"What does that mean?" wondered all the cats. "Rootstar raised her paw. "OOH, OOH! I KNOW! IT'S TACO!" "WHAT!?" Deafkit yowled.

"Right. Sorry." Rootstar mewed. "... .."

"CORRECT!"

"How do you know?" asked Bramblestar.

"I was taught Braille as a little girl." Rootstar sighed dreamily.

"Really, this seems like Morse Code." Smartkit muttered.

"YOU HAVE NO RESPECT FOR BRAILLE!" yowled Rootstar. She translated into braille and told Deafkit what he'd said.

Deafkit started screaming in Braille.

"What's she saying?" asked Smartkit.

"Go away, and... um... you don't want to know." Rootstar bit her lip. "Bye bye, now."


	77. The Day the Catmint Died

**Thank you all for your ideas! You're amazing! Please, if you have ideas, continue sending them in! I'm going to try to do every single idea that was given, so I'll need more! ;)**

**I'll be doing the contest in the next chapter or so. So you can suggest categories! There's going to be a lot more cats participating, as I am going to try to get every OC and some of Erin Hunter's characters in. So there will be a lot more categories.**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Samredlamb7: Yes, I know what Braille is. I should probably be having Deafkit try to teach the cats sign language instead, but that's what SuperGrower requested.**

**Mossfang: Does Desiredwishes have a member of One Direction she obsesses over, too? Because it might be helpful if there's a specific member of 1D she fangirls over.**

* * *

"Oh StarClan..." Jayfeather groaned. "We've used up all the catmint. Time to go gather some!" he walked to the twoleg nest. Then he felt around. "OH MY STARCLAN THE CATMINT HAS DIED!"

Lionblaze ran to him. "What?" he gasped. "The catmint died?"

"Yes!" Jayfeather mewed gravely.

Bramblestar ran in. "THE CATMINT DIED?!" he screamed.

"YES!" Jayfeather and Lionblaze sobbed. Then the whole of the ThunderClan ran in.

"THE CATMINT DIED?!" they screamed.

"YES!" Bramblestar, Lionblaze, and Jayfeather sobbed.

Then all of the other Clans and the Tribe, StarClan, the Dark Forest, the loners, rogues, and kittypets ran in. "THE CATMINT DIED?!" they all screamed.

"YES!" everyone else yowled.

"NO!" they sobbed.

"WHO WOULD DO SUCH A TRAGIC THING?!" wailed Lionblaze.

"I SAW LAVENDERBREEZE AND JAYSTORM KILL IT!" sobbed Blackstar.

"But the catmint is in ThunderClan's territory. How would you know about it?" asked Fernlight.

"Um, I may or may not stroll through other Clan's territories when you are asleep..." Blackstar mewed.

Then Hawkfire appeared. "What's wrong?"

"THE CATMINT DIED!" screamed Lionblaze.

Hawkfire tried to use her powers to resurrect it. But it stayed dead. "OH MY STARCLAN THE CATMINT HAS DIED!" Hawkfire fainted.

Tigerstar, Hawkfrost, Shimmerstar, and Grasstar loomed dangerously over Lavenderbreeze and Jaystorm.

"How dare you?" Tigerstar growled.

"We were sick of the cats eating catmint on top of being hypnotized." Jaystorm shrugged.

Then Lionblaze announced, "We shall have a funeral for our fallen catmint." he mewed solemnly.

"Agreed." everyone nodded.

Hawkfire clapped her paws and they went to the church.

There was a tiny coffin with the ripped-up leaves of the catmint in there. Cats walked up and mewed their final words to the shredded leaves.

Then service started, and slow, death music played and cats weeped and told stories about all the good times they had had with the catmint.

Then they buried it.

A few moons later, at a Gathering, Mistystar announced, "RiverClan has had a small case of Greencough, but thankfully, we had catmint to cure it!"

"CATMINT!" screamed ThunderClan. They stampeded over the cats and ran into RiverClan's territory, and began stuffing their faces with catmint.

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" yowled Hawkfire. "I'm making a boot camp to whip naughty and annoying kitties into shape! Bramblestar, Tigerheart, Blackstar, Onestar, Lionblaze, Purdy, Flashparty, Grasstar, Shimmerstar, Shadowheart, Icepool, Tei-Tei, the Dark Forest, and some other kitties are going!" she clapped her paws and the cats disappeared.

The annoying and naughty cats appeared in a big, grassy clearing with a fence around them.

"No one encages Blackstar!" Blackstar growled. He tried to jump over the fence, but was tossed back.

Flashparty laughed. "An electric fence!" he snorted.

Then Whitestreak appeared, a whistle around his neck. "I'm gonna shape you up!" he roared.

"Not happenin'." Flashparty snorted. He blew up the electric fence and everyone fled.

* * *

"PROBLEMO, FOLKS!" yowled Cinderblaze. "KILLER UNICORNS ARE ATTACKING!"

"MUNCHKIN WARRIORS, ASSEMBLE!" ordered Starstar.

"Explosion Friends, assemble!" growled Shadowheart.

"THUNDERCLAN, ASSEMBLE!" screamed Bramblestar.

"Directionators, come together!" Hawkfire yowled.

"Directioners, to me!" called Nemoblizzard.

Darkfur stood there, his eyes strangely red.

Then the killer unicorns appeared. Their eyes were bloodshot and their horns were chipped. Their fur was messy and they were plain creepy.

"ATTACK!" yowled Starstar. The Munchkin Warriors threw Donut Grenades at them. They didn't work.

The Explosion Friends (Shadowheart, Flashparty, etc), tried to blow them up. It failed.

The Directionators tried to kill them with the original One Direction songs. It didn't go too well.

The Directioners put on the Directionator's evil remixes. That didn't work, either.

Then Darkfur shot the Killer Unicorns with eye lazers and they all died.

"Well then..." Bramblestar stared at him.

"Awkward..."


	78. Contest chapter!

**Contest this chapter! Gosh, there are so many categories and so many cats... a lot of cats, though, were put in twice or more, because there were categories that fit them. So please don't get mad if your cat is only in one category.**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Kylestar: Yeah, but I changed Blazekit's name (my OC's kit, I can do it), because I liked Blazingkit better. And I don't know. It says something like, "Forgot your password" below, but I'm not sure what to do if it's an email account you're putting in incorrectly (Gee, I'm so helpful :P)**

**Moonbeam141: Is it just me or did you figure out the answers yourself? I looked at your profile and it had stuff on it, and you had a new story. But since I don't know if you figured out how to PM, you just go to profile pages and there's something that says "PM" at the top of the profile. Or you can go through reviews. There's a sign on the side of the top of the reviews.**

**Grasstar: No, technically, they weren't singing to her. Bramblestar was supposed to say, "This is for all the pretty kitties out there" (Fernlight, Moonfeather, etc), but I suppose that got cut off. Grasstar just face-pawed because it was stupid and unecessary for them to do that. Sorry if I got your hopes up.**

**Featherpool16: Stop being mean? What do you want me to say? I don't really reply to reviews unless someone's asking me a question, if I'm discussing an error I made in the story and somebody else pointed out, if someone needs help on something in their account, or something else that involves me replying to reviews. None of your reviews seem to need replies. Shimmerstar's right- I can't reply to every single review, or I'd never have time to write anything.**

**Samredlamb7: Yeah, Flashparty can win things, but it isn't "chainsaw juggling" or anything like that. The categories include "epicest", "stupidest", "randomest", etc.**

**Fuzzywhiskerz: Sure.**

**ONTO THE CHAPTER!**

* * *

"CONTEST TIME!" yowled Hawkfire. "TO THE AUDITORIUM!" she clapped her paws and they poofed to the auditorium.

"Yay, contest time!" screamed Stupidkit. "Wait... what's a contest?"

"Why bother explaining it?" Hawkfire grumbled. "Okay, now to the categories! There is stupidest, prettiest she-cat, hottest tom, cutest kit, randomest, best singer/ singing group, epicest, brattiest, ugliest, sanest, hopeless flirter, weirdest, funniest, evillest, prank-est, naughtiest kit, most fangirl-ish, and coolest!"

"I bet I'll be nominated for hottest tom." Foreveraloneforever wiggled his eyebrows.

"Did you ever wonder why you were named "Foreveraloneforever"?" Lavenderbreeze face-pawed.

"No." Foreveraloneforever mewed innocently. "Why?"

"Never mind." Lavenderbreeze sighed.

"Okay, now for nominees!" Hawkfire mewed. "For stupidest, we have Dumbface, E*Tradekit, Lionblaze, Hungryforeverything, Stupidkit, Dumbheart, and Fartkit!

"For randomest, we have Starstar, Furstar, Chocolate Pie that Tastes so Darn Good, Lionblaze, Heartshadow, Rootstar, Cinderblaze, and Cinderxlion00isawesome!

"For brattiest, we have Spoiledkit, Whinykit, and Angelhalo!

"For best singer/ singing group, we have... the Directioners, Directionators, The Elder Chorus, Songheart, and Harmonykit!

"For epicest, we have myself, Flashparty, Darkfur Lightningstrike, Whitestreak, Shadowheart, Orphankit, Goldenwing, and the Munchkin Warriors!

"Then, prettiest she-cat... we have Peppercloud, Fernlight, Moonfeather, Whispersong, Swiftstorm, Cloudfeather, Sweetcat, Angelhalo, Gorgeousleaf, and Perfectstar!

"For hottest tom, we have Trollface, Whitestreak, Lightningstrike, Solar, and Peetahotness!

"Ugliest is Freakishlyoldface, Fattyface, and Foreveraloneforever!

"We actually have sane cats! So you can choose between Lavenderbreeze and Jaystorm!

"Cutest kit is between Bigkit, Wolfkit, Cutekit, and Sleetkit!

"Hopeless flirters include Bramblestar, Lionblaze, and That Cat, and Foreveraloneforever!

"Weirdest include Dumbface, for her love for Purdy, Purdy, for telling all these strange stories, Freakishlyoldface, for just being so very obsessed with rainbows and sparkly things, Fattyface and Hungryforeverything, for their unhealthy passions for eating, and Weirdkit, for, well, being weird.

"For funniest, we have PYSCH, Furstar, Rootstar, Cinderblaze, Cinderxion00isawesome, and Starstar!

"For evillest, we have Grasstar, Shimmerstar, Flashparty, Shadowheart the she-cat, Tei-Tei the Yandre, and Icepool!

"Prankiest includes Orphankit and Chucklez-Lives-On!

"Naughtiest kit includes Innocentkit, Bulletkit, and Ninjakit!

"Most fangirl-ish has Nemoblizzard, Destinysoul, Berrynose, Gorgeousleaf Poppyfrost, and Angelhalo! Who happens to be the only non-One Direction fangirl in this category! Oh, wait, and Dinokit! For Jurassic Park and Jaws!

"And coolest. Whitestreak, Toocool, and Lightningstrike!

"Well, that's it! Good luck, and may the odds be ever in your favor!" Hawkfire purred.

"OMS OMS SHE JUST SAID "MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR! THAT'S A HUNGER GAMES QUOTE RIGHT THERE OMS THAT'S AMAZING!" Angelhalo screamed.

"A true fangirl right there..." Bramblestar snorted.

* * *

"HOW DARE YOU TAKE THE BIRD'S EGGS, YOU BAD PIGGIES!" screamed Bramblestar, tapping his iPhone furiously.

Stupidkit wandered over. "Birds... equals... FOOD!" he screamed, looking at the iPhone. He ate it.

"HOW DARE YOU!" Bramblestar screamed. He began to do the heimlich maneuver on Stupidkit.

Stupidkit spat it out.

Bramblestar picked up broken, slobbery, pieces of his phone. "NOO!" he screamed.

"Funeral, anyone?" Hawkfire scoffed.

Minecraftstar shook his head. He then fixed Bramblestar's phone.

Bramblestar kissed him.

"THAT'S NOT NECESSARY!" yowled Hawkfire.

Ferncloud stuffed her kits up a tree.

* * *

**Okay, I have decided to put the list on my profile. Things will be a little different this time around, because I think critic groups are more aware of me now (because this is the most reviewed story on a larger fandom) and Eliminator already doesn't like me. So I have a list of the cats you can vote for on my profile.**

**Rules:**

**You can only vote once, and one cat from each category, unless you're voting for the same cat in a different category.**

**If your cat loses, don't complain. I was actually considering not doing this again, because with so many cats, and so many new people, I wasn't sure if everyone would be gracious with their defeat. If you aren't... um... go scream into your pillow or something, but please don't complain here. XD**

**You will have 18 chapters (for 18 categories) to vote! So get them in!**

**I've also decided that I shall do the voting on a poll. You have a day to vote for each individual category. I'll try to make a new chapter each day, to remind you. But I don't want to do it here, because of the critic group thing. But if you're a guest... I'll let you vote here, but I won't let the reviews show up. I'm not sure if this is just working around the rules, but, you know. If you're a member on fanfiction and you vote here, I may not let them count. So, you've got to go to my profile.**

**The prize shall be the same as before. A chapter with a winning cat's POV. Unless it is one of my OCs or one of Erin Hunter's cats. And if a cat wins in more than one category, they will only get one chapter.**

**Good luck, and may the odds be ever in your favor!**

**(Supergrower, added her in)**

**(Leturtlewings, added her in)**


	79. INTO THE PIT OF IDEAS!

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Spottedfur of WindClan: Oh geez. Saw the reviews . That's DISGUSTING! _What _a troll. Sadly you can't report guests, I've tried before. You can't block them either. Fanfiction doesn't have control over guests because they don't have accounts, meaning they can't keep track of them. You can remove them, though. Go to "reviews", click on "remove review", select the story, and all the guest reviews show up. Click the "remove" button for all of them. And a suggestion: have you ever tried moderating the guest reviews instead of automatically letting them through? You can go to "reviews" then "moderate reviews". If something like that shows up again, don't even bother letting it through. Whoever wrote those is messed up. **

**Kylestar: Yeah, you're a guest, I guess, because you can't log in and vote on the poll.**

**People, again, if you have accounts and vote for the cats in reviews, I'm not counting them, because I'm not sure if it's against the rules. I'm sorry, but you've got to vote on the poll if you have an account or your opinion can't be included.**

**RicekitxTofukit: That _would _be a good category, but you're the only cat who has submitted healthy cats, giving you an automatic win, and that isn't fair. Sorry.**

**Leturtlewings: No, you didn't miss it. I just added him in after you told me.**

**Wolf that Howls at Eclipse: Yeah, I meant Wolffur... I changed her category. I was reading the roleplay on RandomClan.**

**Shimmerstar: Sure you can! (Why do I keep forgetting to add that in?)**

**(PS... new poll up! For the "randomest"! Please vote!)**

* * *

One night, at a Gathering, a bunch of weird cats appeared and began to chant. And then a hole opened up in the center of the island. The cats smiled and poofed away.

Hawkfire grinned. "THE PIT OF IDEAS!" she screamed.

"The pit of... what now?" Lionblaze asked, dumbfounded.

"The pit of ideas!" Hawkfire purred. "If you jump into it, you get a lot of ideas!"

"Well... I do need ideas on how to win the "evilest" competition!" Shimmerstar purred. "Count me in!" she dove into the pit. Then jumped out. "I GOT IT!" she screamed. "BRIBERY!" she sashayed up to Lionblaze. "If you vote for me in the "evilest" competition, I shall give you fur polish!"

"DEAL!" screamed Lionblaze. "Wait... but I wanted Goldenwing's Chapstick! Can I take back the deal?"

"You can, but I won't let you."

"Oh."

"I need a new way to torture someone!" Flashparty announced. He jumped into the pit. Then jumped out. "ATTACK OF THE KITS!" he yowled, and sent Ninjakit, Bulletkit, Chainsawkit, Bombkit, and Torturekit after poor Bramblestar, Flashparty's next victim.

"NEED... PRANKING... IDEAS!" Orphankit yowled. She leaped into the pit. Then she hopped out, and sprayed Dovewing and Ivypool in silly string. "MWA HAHAHA!" she screamed, and ran away.

"That's one cuckoo kitty." DA PIE whispered.

Orphankit smushed a pie into his face, and he blew up.

Rootstar screamed, "HALLELUJAH!" and did a swan dive into the pit. Then she floated upwards. "ME NEED MORE WAYS TO BE RANDOM!" she yowled.

"Aren't you random enough?" CaptainObviouskit asked.

Rootstar's eyes turned red. "NO." she began to whack Bramblestar with a butterfly.

"What are you doing?" Bramblestar hissed.

"Um, eating your mother." Rootstar shrugged.

"YOU'RE DOING WHAT?!" gasped Bramblestar. "THAT'S CANNIBALISM!" he began to cry. Rootstar sighed. "It's part of being random, bro. I'm not eating your mother." then a stupid, wide, grin spread over her face. "I'm eating your sister!"

"TAWNYPELT!" wailed Bramblestar. "NO!"

"Dude." Tawnypelt sighed. "I'm right here."

"WE MUST HIDE YOU! ROOTSTAR IS PLANNING TO EAT YOUR FACE!"

Tawnypelt slapped Bramblestar. "You can't deal with the RANDOMNESS!" Rootstar screamed.

Bramblestar scoffed. "I can deal with randomness." then he screamed into the Pit of Ideas, "HOW DO I DEAL WITH RANDOMNESS?!" he leaped into the pit, then hopped out. "THE ALL-WISE PIT TOLD ME THAT TO DEAL WITH RANDOMNESS, I MUST BE RANDOM!" he stomped over to where Lionblaze was selling catmint. "Catmint me!" he growled.

Like a bartender or something, Lionblaze slid a bunch of leaves over the counter. "Two mice." he growled, like a bartender or something.

Bramblestar threw two mice at Lionblaze and stuffed the catmint in his mouth. Then his eyes got really wide, and he started to sound like a really squeaky chipmunk. Then he squealed and put on a bikini. He began singing Eminem's "Lose Yourself" while doing a cross between Gangnam Style and the Harlem Shake.

"OH MAH STARCLAN THAT LOOKS LIKE FUN!" screamed Rootstar. She put on a bikini, got a chipmunk voice, and began singing and dancing with Bramblestar.

"NO! HAVE ANY OF YOU HEARD EMINEM'S SONGS?!" screamed Ferncloud. "THEY ARE INAPPROPRIATE!"

Of course, Dustpelt felt that the time was right to start singing "Cinderella Man".

Ferncloud stuffed the kits up a tree, took out her duck tape and gagged her mate, Bramblestar, Rootstar, and everyone else who had joined in. And that was everyone.

Stupidkit laughed stupidly, falling out of the tree, and wrapping himself up in duct tape.

Lionblaze screamed. "NOOOO!" he wailed. "THE SILVER MUMMY HAS RETURNED FOR VENGEANCE!" he ran around in circles. "OH, WHATEVER SHALL WE DO?!"

"Die." Ruffledfur mewed sarcastically.

So that's exactly what Lionblaze did.

But Hawkfire resurrected him, because he had to be alive if he was going to win anything in the contest.

"What did the Silver Mummy do in the first place?" Brackenfur asked.

The Silver Mummy crashed into a tree.

"THAT!" Lionblaze screamed. "HE CRASHED INTO A TREE... IT WAS SO SCARY, I WET-"

"More information than we need to know!" Hollyleaf covered her ears.

"These times just keep getting weirder." Lavenderbreeze face-pawed.

Jaystorm shrugged. "We knew this would come."

"Yeah..."


	80. Chapter 80! Heehee

**Reply to Reviews:**

**MoonpoolOrHalflight: I don't PM, so I'll do it here, if that's okay with you. You make a story by going to "New Story" under "Publish" and then answer a question about the category, fill in the genre, select a document from document manager, write the summary, choose the rating, etc. then "create new story". There you have it. And the document manager is where you write/copy-and-paste your story chapters. And I haven't a clue what a story ID is. (I'm so helpful :P)**

**Silverstar-of-ThunderClan: I might have, but I lost it anyways. Would you mind sending it again? And I was serious when I said your vote couldn't count if you sent it in by review. Please vote on the poll for your opinion to count. Sorry, but I don't want this story to be reported and removed- I've worked really hard on this, and it seems like everyone enjoys this.**

**-Speaking of poll, the next one is up! So please vote! It is for "brattiest". **

**Shadowheartdragon: I know, right? It was so annoying! **

**Cinderxlion00: Yeah, it is pretty good.**

**MouthOfChayton: I doubt you're reading this, but I gave a warning that this would be random. Don't like, don't read.**

**Remember to vote on the poll! Now onto the chapter!**

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Goldenwing. "I HAVE COME UP WITH PIE FLAVORED CHAPSTICK!"

"PIE?!" screamed Mapleleaf and DA PIE. Then their teeth fell out, because the pie rotted them.

"EW!" screamed the cats.

"Not to worry!" yowled Jayfeather. "I have been testing things in my lab, and I have come up with pie flavored dentures!"

"PIE FLAVORED DENTURES?!" screamed Mapleleaf.

"Wait... wasn't your lab taken away?" asked DA PIE, confused.

"Um... maybe..." Jayfeather mewed.

"Where is it?" Mapleleaf asked.

"Not tellin' you." Jayfeather growled.

"If you don't, we shall hand you over to the Kitty Police for having gotten a new lab." DA PIE mewed calmly.

Jayfeather pointed into his den. "There's a secret stairway that leads to my lab."

"TO THE PIE FLAVORED DENTURES!" the two cats screamed, and ran into Jayfeather's den then into his lab. They broke a bunch of stuff then wandered out with their pie-flavored dentures. Mapleleaf was covered in green, goopy stuff and DA PIE's fur was spiky and rainbow-colored.

"What did you do?" Jayfeather wailed.

"Bumped into a lot of stuff and made a mess." DA PIE mewed simply.

"What do you do in that lab, anyways? Cuz this is WEIRD!" Mapleleaf mewed, trying to paw off a clump of the goop.

"Try to find a cure for diabetes." Jayfeather mewed innocently.

Bramblestar growled, and stared at Jayfeather threateningly. "JAYFEATHER..."

"Okay, okay! I'm trying to come up with poison to take over the Clans!"

"OH MY STARCLAN JUST LIKE PRESIDENT SNOW!" Angelhalo screamed and fainted.

"Well, I think you've found your poison..." Lavenderbreeze glanced at DA PIE, who, instead of trying to paw it off or go into the lake or a river, tried to lick it off. His eyes were large and droopy and had a lost look to them. His fur was sagging and the rainbow color was wearing off, leaving his fur a sickly yellow.

"OH MY STARCLAN JAYFEATHER YOU HAVE CREATED KITTY MORPHLING!" Angelhalo revived and then fainted.

"OH MY STARCLAN IT'S A POTATO!" yowled Cinderblaze, pointing at Lionblaze. He pouted.

"I don't look like a potato! I look like hotness!" he puffed out his chest.

"No you don't." Roseheart growled. "That is what hotness looks like." she pointed at her mate, Whitestreak. About a billion she-cats were mooning over him. Roseheart growled. "PAWS OFF MY MAN!" she screamed, and began to drive the billion she-cats away.

"NOMNOMNOMNOM WUPPA GANGNAM STYLE!" screamed Cinderxlion00isawesome. Then she skipped over to Normalkit. "Thank you, Grandpa, for dry-cleaning my doughnuts!" she mewed cheerily.

"Awkward..." Normalkit ran away.

Starstar leaped on her. "WHERE DID YOU GET YOUR DONUTS DRY-CLEANED?!" she screamed. "I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO FIND ONE OF THOSE PLACES SINCE FOREVER!"

Cinderxlion00isawesome got a silly grin on her face and whispered something into Starstar's ear. Starstar's expression turned shocked, then angry. She slapped Cinderxlion00isawesome and ran away laughing.

"Does anyone have any idea what just happened there?" asked Fernlight.

"Nope." Hawkfire's eyes were wide.

Then Rootstar ran by singing, Swedish House Mafia's "Don't you Worry Child", while juggling squirrels with her nose and swinging a golf club.

"Does anyone know anything about that?" Fernlight asked.

Moonfeather shrugged. "You can only blame her randomness trait and catmint."

**DUN DUN DUN...**


	81. Mrs Cuckoo Banannas

**Reply to reviews:**

**Jayleaf1: My bond with the reviewers is mutual. They expect updates frequently, so is it so wrong that I should ask for a lot of feedback? Plus, I was trying to joke. Didja notice the "XD" at the end? XD**

**-Oh, PDA means "Public Display of Affection"**

**Chococrazygrrl8: OKAY! HERE YOU GO! XD (Jayleaf1, see what I mean?)**

**The new contest is up! It's for the "best singer". So please vote!**

**This is continued from next chapter. **

* * *

"CATMINT!" screamed Rootstar. She stomped over to Lionblaze's Catmint stand. "GIMME, GIMME, GIMME!" she screamed.

"OKAY!" Lionblaze sobbed, and gave her a large bucket of catmint.

Rootstar smiled psychotically and dumped the bucket over her head, and like a vacuum cleaner or something, she sucked it all up. "NUM NUMS!" she screamed. Then she stomped over to Foreveraloneforever. "HEY YOU!" she screamed.

Foreveraloneforever jumped. "W-w-what, psycho kitty?" he asked.

"YOU ARE TOO SEXY!" Rootstar kissed him and began to flirt with the giant panda.

"ROOTSTAR, WIFEY!" yowled a tom. "WHADDYA DOIN'?"

"Hiiiiii Talonstripe!" Rootstar giggled, twirling her fur.

"She's hyped up on catmint." Moonfeather whispered to him.

Talonstripe face-pawed.

Then a bunch of she-cats came up to him, drooling.

"Hiii, hotness." flirted Squirrelflight.

"I am in a relationship." Talonstripe pushed them away.

"How about you dump Mrs. Cuckoo Bananas over there and we go out?" Blossomfall smiled.

"MY NAME IS ROOTSTAR, NOT MRS. CUCKOO BANANAS, YOU NO GOOD JACK FROST!"

"What's a "Jack Frost"?" wondered Stupidkit.

Jackfrostpaw face-pawed. "That would be me."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"OKAY, KITTIES!" yowled Bramblestar. "WE SHALL LEARN THE HARLEM SHAKE!"

"Whoo!" Mistystar cried.

Bramblestar put on his iPod and the music blared out. "AFTER ME!" he yowled. He flopped onto the floor and began acting like a fish out of water.

"That's not how you do it!" Squirrelflight snapped. "This is how you do it!" she climbed up onto a tree, then fell out of it, then began to flop around.

"That's not how you do it!" Whitestreak face-pawed. He then did the Harlem Shake perfectly.

"That's definitely not correct." Bramblestar scoffed. "I don't think you know anything!"

Whitestreak took a deep breath. "Just ignore him." he muttered to himself, and walked away.

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" yowled Fernlight. "I HAVE GOTTEN MOONFEATHER CHAINED UP AND WE SHALL HAVE A DATING SHOW... FEATURING HER!"

"Ooh!" Bramblestar cooed. "I shall sign up!"

They were poofed to a stage. In chairs, there was Bramblestar, Lionblaze, Thornclaw, Onestar, Graystripe, and Foxleap. And chained to the wall was Moonfeather.

"Welcome to "Win a Date with Moonfeather"!" Fernlight purred. "I'm your host, Fernlight! And I shall ask a series of questions to the contestants, and whoever gets the most right wins a date with Moonfeather!"

"All right!" Lionblaze whooped.

"I have been preparing for this day." "Then let's start with you, Lionblaze! When is Moonfeather's birthday? Hint, it's the same as mine!"

"Uhhh... I DIDN'T KNOW THE QUESTIONS WOULD BE ABOOUT YOU!" sobbed Lionblaze. Fernlight face-pawed.

"Moving on! Bramblestar, Moonfeather was the one who gave you the shot that created the record-breaking scream, correct?"

Bramblestar nodded. "It hurt, but I am willing to overlook it for love." he mewed solemnly.

"Lovely! Well, Moonfeather used her largest needle on you. How big is it?"

"Um... a gazillion feet long!" Bramblestar blurted out.

"Nope! It may seem like that, but it's only five feet two inches long and three feet wide!" Fernlight snorted. "Now for Thornclaw! What is Moonfeather's profession?"

"No fair!" cried Lionblaze. "He gets an easy question!"

"Um... fairy princess!" Thornclaw guessed.

Fernlight face-pawed again. "I'm guessing I was wrong."

"Yeah... now to Onestar!"

Every single tom got every single question wrong until the very last round, when Ferncloud asked Bramblestar, "Who does she hate the most?"

"Me." Bramblestar sighed. "But we are destined to be together, I'm sure!"

"CORRECT IN BOTH WAYS!" screamed Fernlight. "YOU ARE GOING ON A DATE WITH MOONFEATHER!"

"YAY!" screamed Bramblestar. He puffed out his chest and strutted over to Moonfeather. He wiggled his eyebrows. "You and me, baby."

"No." Moonfeather broke free of the chains and flew away.

"The prize just flew away." Bramblestar mewed bleakly. Then he fell onto his knees. "MY FUTURE WIFE HAS RUN AWAY!" he sobbed.

Fernlight face-pawed so heard she knocked herself backwards.

* * *

"FIREFLIGHT, FOR THE LAST TIME, JOIN OUR BAND!" screamed Coppercreek. He and Tenderfoot were holding Fireflight hostage because she wouldn't join their band. They had already been there for a year and she hadn't said yes. "No." Fireflight snarled, struggling at the ropes that tied her to a chair.

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"DIE!"

"Huh?"

The building exploded.

Coppercreek and Tenderfoot were standing in the ashes, their fur all black. Fireflight smiled, and ripped free of the ropes, her fur not black. Then she ran away.

"That's what she meant..." Coppercreek mewed.


	82. Another random chapter

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Jayleaf1: I changed it. Sorry 'bout that. But you can't think when you're attempting to be funny. Well-though parodies are often pretty bad because the authors try too hard. And "XD" is just like another way to do ":D".**

**Chococrazygrrl8: HERE'S MORE! *Throws chapter* XD**

**Swiftwing1: You can't speak braille. It's bumps on paper. But this is a random story, why are people pegging me about accuracies? And no, there wasn't a DA BOMB. That was what Reedwhisker thought DA EPIC ONE's name was when he decided to have RiverClan blow up the lake. And who was your cat? I apologize, but I might have missed him. Aren't you the creator of Swiftwing, though? I've had her in here.**

**Moonsoul: There's a 100 chapter limit? Where does it say that?**

**NeonfoxXTrot: You've read this story... five times? I'm honored!**

**Okay, onto the chapter!**

**Disclaimer (I have no clue why I keep forgetting these): I don't own Warriors, Air Buddies (that movie's practically forgotten :P), or any of the OC cats except for some.**

* * *

"So, for Cat News!" mewed an announcer. "The weather is- OH MY STARCLAN BREAKING NEWS!" he yowled. "FERNLIGHT AND MOONFEATHER HAVE BEEN SEEN WITH TOMS!"

"WHAT!?" screamed Bramblestar. "BUT ONE OF THEM WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY MATE!"

Squirrelflight face-pawed. "I really don't think so."

"Well, I do." growled Bramblestar. Then he began to yowl, "TELL US MORE!" "You want to hear more?" the announcer winked. "Well, here you go! The two hot twins have been spotted with two other hot twins! Toms, I mean. They've been at a carnival and the toms have been winning the she-cats a lot of things..." he cut to a clip of the carnival and Fernlight was walking with a giant pink stuffed bear, and Moonfeather had a large heart-shaped stuffed bear, and the toms had a bunch of other things in their paws. Moonfeather was twining tails with one tom, and Fernlight with the other.

"I'm going to go over there." Bramblestar growled. He stomped out of the den and ran to the carnival. "HEY!" he yowled. "WHADDYA DOIN' WITH MY WOMEN?!"

"Um... we're their cousins." one of the toms, who had a nick in his right ear, snorted.

Bramblestar stared at the she-cats. "Then why were you twining tails with them?"

"To get toms like you jealous." Moonfeather shrugged.

"Who are they, anyways?"

"The one with the nick in the right ear is Wolfclaw, and the one with the nick in the left ear is Wolftalon." Fernlight mewed.

"Well, then..." Bramblestar mewed. "This is awkward..." then a weird gleam got into his eyes. "THAT MEANS YOU TOO ARE STILL ON THE MARKET!" he immediately started to flirt with them.

Fernlight face-pawed.

* * *

"Goldenwing, can I touch your Chapstick?" asked Lionblaze.

"NO!" yowled Goldenwing. She pulled out something.

"What are those?" asked Lionblaze.

"Chapstick Grenades." Goldenwing mewed simply.

"Oh no." Lionblaze slowly backed away.

"Oh yes." Goldenwing smiled evilly.

"AHHH!" Lionblaze screamed, and began to run. "SPARE ME, SPARE ME!" he yowled.

Goldenwing hissed. "I'm going to get revenge for you touching my Chapstick!"

"BUT I HAVEN'T DONE IT YET!" Lionblaze sobbed.

"What?" Goldenwing paused. "You haven't?"

"No."

"Oh."

"Awkward..."

"Well, too bad, because chasing you is FUN!" Goldenwing yowled, and began to chase Lionblaze.

* * *

Shimmerstar pointed a claw at Ivypool. "You once had a relationship with Hawkfrost, so I must say this to you." she growled. "YOUR HAMSTER ATE MY KETCHUP!" she screamed.

"But I don't have a hamster!" Ivypool protested. "If I did, I probably ate him. I've been trying to cut back on the mice lately. I'm turning into Graystripe!"

An extremely fat Graystripe dragged himself by. "What's wrong with me?" he puffed.

"Oh, nothing..." Ivypool bit her lip.

"Okay." Graystripe began to drag himself again. "So... far..." he panted.

"What? The mountains?" Shimmerstar asked.

"No, the fresh-kill pile." panted Graystripe. "I know! I shall use the force! HUMMMMMM..."

"That sounds like Buddha from "Air Buddies" or something." Ivypool mewed.

"Whatever." Graystripe continued to drag himself over to the pile, to find Hungryforeverything had eaten it all. "NOO!" he screamed, and then ate the pile. Or where the pile used to be. Now there's a big pit in the center of ThunderClan's camp.

"Where was I?" Shimmerstar wondered. "Right. By the royal decree of I, the awesome Shimmerstar, herby dub thee mud!" she then flew away on a polka-dot penguin.

"Penguins can't fly, though!" Ivypool called.

"This is a random world. I can do whatever I want, and penguins can be eligible to fly!" Shimmerstar retorted, and flew away back to the Dark Forest where her hubby Hawkfrost currently resides.

"Awkward..."

* * *

**I think Lionblaze and Goldenwing have an *ahem* _love-hate _relationship, if you know what I mean. Goldenwing, care to reply? :D**

**New poll's up. It's for epicest.**

**(PS. If Moonsoul's right and there's a 100-chapter limit, do you think we could make it to 2000 reviews before I have to start a new story for this?)**


	83. La-dee-da

**Shimmerstar: No, you don't sound bossy. I'll try to do some more with them, but Shimmerstar is also in here a bit more than a lot of others who only have one OC. So please try to be flexible if I don't fit them in.**

**SummerLeaf: That's personal.**

**Mossfang: I have no idea what was going through my mind, and we'll see about the Desiredwishes thing.**

**Amberspirit: Technically, they won't let you get an account until you're a teenager, but I think it would be okay to maybe post your stories under a parent or an older sibling's account- like, sharing it or something.**

**Fuzzyheart: Acornflight is right- I can't respond to everything. And the point of reviewing is to give the author feedback/constructive criticism.**

**RubyArtist: Geez, you do love caps, huh? *Highfive***

**Next poll's up. For the "prettiest she-cat"**

**I used some YouTube things in this story (Tigerstar and Scourge) and put them together. Don't own it! Or anything else...**

* * *

"I'M GONNA POP SOME TAGS, ONLY GOT TWENTY DOLLARS IN MY POCKET!"

"Hold on!" cried Ferncloud. "Is this the explicit or clean version?"

Bramblestar put his hands on his hips and rolled his eyes at Ferncloud. "Explicit. Duh."

"THEN PAUSE!" screamed Ferncloud. She pushed her kits into the tree and then shoved soap into the singers' mouths. "Continue."

Bramblestar spit the soap out of his mouth. "THIS IS-" he paused. "Now my mouth feels too clean to be singing such a dirty song."

Ferncloud purred.

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Bramblestar. "WE ARE GOING TO WATCH A REENACTMENT OF THE TIME WHEN TIGERSTAR MET SCOURGE!"

"YAY!" Mosskit squealed. "DRAMATIC FLASHBACK TIME!" she purred. "There haven't been enough of those lately!"

"Okay, Boulder, take me to Scourge!" Tigerstar mewed. "All right, Tigerstar, but if this experience is anything like the time you insisted that we try to crash that "Twilight" premiere party, I will-"

"Quiet, Boulder!" Tigerstar snapped. "Cats are staring." he stomped out of the camp, and Boulder ran after him.

...

"How could anybody live in a place like this?" scoffed Tigerstar. "I mean, it's so drab! It needs a nice pink."

"Oh, shush Tigerstar! I know Scourge doesn't have the best taste in fashion, but he could kill you if he wanted to!"

"Oh su-" Tigerstar paused. He saw a small black cat. "OhmyStarClan is that Scourge?" he breathed.

"Yeah."

Tigerstar ran right up to Scourge and put his tail around his neck (What a flirt). "Hey, I just met you!" he sang. "And this is cray-zee! But here's my number! So call me may-be! And all the other booooyyyysss... try to chhaaase me! But here's my number! So call me may-be!"

Scourge pulled himself away from Tigerstar. "Do I know you?"

"Can I give you a hug?" Tigerstar cooed.

"No."

"You seem tense. How about a massage?" Tigerstar wiggled his eyebrows.

"I'm fine, really."

"How about a kiss?" Tigerstar smiled.

"Are you flirting with me?" Scourge hissed.

"What _ever_ gave you that idea?" Tigerstar wrapped his arms around Scourge's neck."

"Um... well... this." Scourge mewed awkwardly, pulling himself away from Tigerstar.

Tigerstar sobbed. "WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS?!" be wailed. "WHY-"

"Oh, shut up and go away." Scourge flicked his tail.

"Fine." Tigerstar stomped away. "BUT I SHALL HAVE YOU SOMEDAY!"

Scourge turned to Boulder. "That sounds dirty."

"His two wives broke up with him and nobody was willing to go with him to the prom. Give him a break."

"TWILIGHT IS THE BEST BOOK EVER!" screamed Blackstar. They were at a Gathering again.

All of the Twilight cats ran over to ShadowClan's cats.

"NO, HARRY POTTER IS THE BEST!" yowled Bramblestar.

"PERCY JACKSON!" screamed Onestar.

All of the Percy Jackson cats ran over to them.

"HUNGER GAMES!" screeched Mistystar.

All of the Hunger Games cats ran over to them. "Twilight is for mary-sues." scoffed Bramblestar.

"No." Blackstar growled defensively.

Squirrelflight flicked her tail. "Well, those two aren't helping your case." she mewed, motioning at Edwardkit and Bellakit, who were making out.

"That's creepy." mewed Bramblestar.

Ferncloud did the reasonable thing of stuffing her kits up a tree.

"The Hunger Games is practically just about a freak love triangle and some more." Bramblestar growled.

"Oh snap!" Onestar snapped his fingers in a z-formation.

"And Percy Jackson is just plain weird." Bramblestar mewed.

"Why is Bramblestar dissing all of us?" sobbed Blackstar, wiping his eyes on his Twilight tee-shirt.

"Because that's just who I am!" Bramblestar mewed sassily.

"You're mean!" sobbed a WindClan kit.

"Thanks." Bramblestar strutted away.

"Well... this is awkward..." DA PIE moved away.


	84. Truth, Dare, Kiss, Promise, or Torture

**Wow. I was really surprised with the last poll's result. I'm not sure if I should be telling you this, but it was Gorgeousleaf. And a lot of people voted for her. I'm not sure wether I should be honored or feel implied to pull her from the contest. Instead of a poll for the contest, can I request that you vote on this poll: "Was your desicion to pick Gorgeousleaf as "prettiest she-cat" affected by the fact that she is my, the author's, OC?". I don't know who voted, and I won't, so please voice your answer honestly.**

**I have also decided that this will be your last chapter to submit OCs. I do not get all them in a fair amount, and I don't think I can keep this up for the whole story. So this is your last chapter. If you submitted a kitty before this and they haven't been in yet, they will. But if you submit cats after this chapter, I won't be able to use them.**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Lantern in the Dark: Yeah, I know! It's awesome! And I was the first story on this fandom to reach 1000 reviews. Hopefully 2000, and maybe 3000... (I dream)**

**ICanHasCheesburger: What's Gayle?**

**Meow: Yeah, I did. **

**Max Saturday: (These are more or less replies from my other stories) I'm glad you like them, but it's highly unlikely I'll update either of them anytime soon. My main priority is this story, because of how popular it is, and I have no inspiration for either of the other stories. Sorry.**

**Happy Easter and April Fish Day! I learned that, in France, schoolkids make paper fish and stick them on people's backs. I wanna do that!**

**Someone: Are you posting that comic somewhere? I'm perfectly fine with that, but if this is gonna go public, I'd like to receive the proper credit ;)**

**(Sorry I didn't make an Easter chapter, I've been busy)**

* * *

"TRUTH, DARE, KISS, PROMISE, OR TORTURE!" yowled Bramblestar. "WE SHALL DO TRUTH, DARE, KISS, PROMISE, OR TORTURE!"

"Yay!" the cats cheered.

"We must spin ze bottle." Bramblestar grabbed a bottle and spun it. "It has landed on... Moonfeather! Roar..." he wiggled his eyebrows.

"I'll do truth." Moonfeather sighed.

"Boo!" Whitestreak booed. "Truth is boring!"

"Bramblestar'll do something really bad if I chose anything else." Moonfeather defended herself.

"What would he do?" snorted Whitestreak.

"Dare me to make out with him, kiss him, promise to marry him, and, um... I can't say the last thing out loud because Ferncloud hasn't gotten her kits out of here yet." Moonfeather scrambled over to Whitestreak and whispered it to him.

Whitestreak's eyes got wide. "Is this game allowed to go that extreme?"

Moonfeather shrugged and sat back down. "Okay, Bramblestar, what do I have to do for my truth?"

"Am I sexy?" Bramblestar wiggled his eyebrows.

"First, stop wiggling your eyebrows, that's getting you nowhere." Moonfeather snapped at him. "And second, no. I wouldn't think you were sexy even if you were."

"Oh." Bramblestar mewed quietly. Then he wiggled his eyebrows. "You're just shy."

Moonfeather slapped him. "Stop wiggling your eyebrows, and no, I'm not "just shy". I'm a medicine cat and unlike many others-" she glanced at Yellowfang, Spottedleaf, and Leafpool. "I'm loyal to my duties."

"So you're saying, if you weren't so loyal, you'd go out with me?" Bramblestar asked.

"No."

"Shy! You're just shy." Moonfeather slapped him and then she spun the bottle. It landed on Firestar. "Okay, Firestar, truth, dare, kiss, promise, or torture?"

"DARE!" screamed Firestar. He puffed out his chest. "I'm manly."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Okay, your dare is to wear this pink, frilly, dress, climb to the top of the tree you usually use for Gatherings, and sing Flo Rida's "Right Round" as loud as you can. After that, go to both Spottedleaf and Sandstorm and ask them to sing with you. If either of them say yes, you've got to sing it again with them." Moonfeather grinned.

"M'kay." Firestar shrugged. He pulled on the dress and shimmied up the tree. "YOU SPIN MY HEAD RIGHT ROUND, RIGHT ROUND,..."

The cats started laughing loudly.

"Good one, Moonfeather!" Squirrelflight laughed.

"Hey Dad!" yowled Leafpool. "You look gorgeous!"

"I do?" Firestar asked.

"KEEP SINGING!" ordered Moonfeather.

"Right. YOU SPIN MY HEAD..."

The cats continued laughing.

When he'd finished, he strutted up to Sandstorm and Spottedleaf. "You guys wanna sing it with me? It's fun!"

"No." Sandstorm sighed.

Spottedleaf's eyes were hearts. "I'LL SING IT WITH YOU, MY PRECIOUS FIRESTAR!"

So they both climbed up into a tree, Spottedleaf in her pink, frilly dress and they sang.

"I never knew Flo Rida could be used to humiliate cats so badly." ABCkit laughed.

Firestar climbed down the tree and spun the bottle. "Let's see... Orphankit!"

"Bring it on, Gramps!" Orphankit rubbed her paws together. "Dare!"

"Hm... you're a kit, so I can't do anything too extreme..." Firestar rubbed his chin.

Orphankit crossed her arms. "I can deal with whatever you can give me." "Okay, then... I dare you to wear this bikini, stand on Blackstar's head for no apparent reason, and sing "Thrift Shop" while doing the Harlem Shake."

"Ooh!" the cats oohed.

"That's a good one, Firestar!" Onestar laughed.

Orphankit picked up the bikini top by the straps. "What is this?"

"Bikini top."

"Seems more like a rubber band type thing." Orphankit mewed. "The straps could make it one." she aimed the top at Ashfur and flung it onto his face.

"EW!" Ashfur screamed, and began to run around, the top covering his eyes. "Get it off me!"

The cats laughed really hard.

"Orphankit, do the dare or you'll get torture!" Firestar growled.

"Kay." Orphankit took the top off of Ashfur's face, put it on, along with the bottoms, stood on Blackstar's head, and began to sing, "I'M GONNA POP SOME TAGS..." while doing the Harlem Shake. She accidentally fell off Blackstar's head afterwards.

"That was weird..."

"Okay, then..." Orphankit spun the bottle. It landed on Rootstar. "Truth, dare, kiss, promise, or torture?" she asked.

"Promise!" Rootstar mewed cheerily.

"Okay, then... promise you'll marry the panda."

"But-"

"Do you want torture?"

"No. But I'm already married."

"What?"

"Talonstripe, remember?" mewed Rootstar.

"Oh. Yeah..." Orphankit mewed. "Well, if you're not going to do the promise, you get torture! Your torture is to watch this video of Talonstripe kissing Fernlight!"

"WHAA!" sobbed Rootstar. After it was over, she spun the bottle. "Shimmerstar! Truth, dare, kiss, or promise?"

"Kiss!" Shimmerstar mewed. Then she put a paw over her mouth. "Oh no... I wasn't thinking... can I change it?"

"No! Kiss the cat to your right, then left, and judge who is the better kisser!" Rootstar mewed.

Shimmerstar kissed the cat to her right, Ashfur, and the cat to her left, Hawkfrost. "Hawkfrost is the better kisser!"

Hawkfrost is her hubby. So duh.

* * *

**I love doing chapters like these! I love daring the cats and stuff... so, I need your opinion! Would you read a story that is entirely made up of this type of thing? **


	85. The thing that annoys Squirrelflight

**Okay, I'm glad that that was the reason about the poll. Well, now it's for the "hottest tom". So please vote!**

**So you guys would read a "truth, dare, kiss, promise, or torture" story from me?**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**OnceInABlueSun: Yeah, there is ;)**

**In the next few chapters, I will get in the OCs that haven't been in here. So... yeah.**

**ON WITH THE CHAPTER! I DON'T OWN ANYTHING EXCEPT FOR OCS!**

* * *

"APPLE BOTTOM JEANS, BOOTS WITH THE FURRRRRR..." screamed Bramblestar.

"SHUT UP ALREADY!" screamed Squirrelflight. "YOU'VE BEEN SINGING THAT STUPID SONG FOR ALMOST THREE WEEKS NOW, AND YOU HAVEN'T SHUT UP! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!"

"I just love this song!" Bramblestar smiled.

"It was made in 2009."

"So?"

"It's OLD!" Then Thornclaw burst in. "YOU BETTER LOSE YOURSELF-"

"That's old, too."

"YEAH, YEAH, YEAH-" sang Brackenfur.

"OLD!"

"I'M BRINGIN' SEXY BACK, YEAH!" yowled Bumblestripe.

"OLD OLD OLD!" screamed Squirrelflight.

"YOU SPIN MY HEAD RIGHT ROUND-" sang Mousewhisker. "SHUT UP!" screamed Squirrelflight.

"SHUT UP, SHUT UP!" yowled Squirrelflight. "WHY MUST YOU SING SO MANY OLD SONGS?!"

"To annoy you!" Bramblestar blinked innocently.

"ARGH!" moaned Squirrelflight. She stomped away.

The toms ran after her. "You better lose yourself..."

"Apple bottom jeans..."

"You spin my head right round..."

"I'm bringin' sexy back, yeah!"

"You got me like oh my gosh, I'm so in love..." more toms were joining in.

"AHHHH OLD SONGS SAVE ME SAVE ME!" Squirrelflight yowled, and began to run around in circles.

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Bramblestar. "I HAVE GOTTEN CHINESE FOOD!"

"Fascinating!" Blossomfall mewed.

"I CALL THE CHOPSTICKS!" yowled Weirdkit. He took a pair of chopsticks and stuffed them in his mouth.

"What are you doing?" asked Bramblestar, bewildered.

"I said I called the chopsticks. But these are a little dry..." Weirdkit mewed, and continued eating chopsticks. "Can I have some soy sauce here?"

"I WANT A FORTUNE COOKIE!" screamed Whinykit.

"Here you go." her mother mewed, handing her a cookie.

Whinykit opened the fortune cookie. "You get annoyed by small things". WHAT A STUPID FORTUNE! I WANT A BETTER ONE!" she screamed.

"I wonder how the fortune got to her." Brackenfur mewed innocently.

"So do I..." Sorreltail bit her lip to prevent herself from laughing.

"SHUT UP!" yowled Whinykit. Then she screamed at her mother, "GIVE ME A BETTER FORTUNE! NOW!"

"But you only get one-" she began. "I DON'T CARE! GIVE ME ANOTHER COOKIE!"

"Here, have mine!" her mother mewed hurriedly.

"Annoyance is a big emotion for you"... AHHHH! THESE FORTUNES ARE AWFUL! I HATE THEM, I HATE THEM, I HATE THEM!" Whinykit screamed, and ripped up the paper.

"What a whiner..." muttered Brightheart.

"Indeed." Cloudtail snorted.

* * *

"LET'S MAKE A CAKE!" screamed Hawkfire.

"YAY!" screamed the cats. "CAKE!"

"But... what about pie?" whimpered Mapleleaf.

"Not today, bro!" Hawkfire mewed. She poofed up all the ingredients made for a cake.

"CAKE!" Weirdkit squealed, and then began to throw pawfuls of flour at cats.

"Weirdkit, stop it!" Ferncloud scolded him. "You don't throw flour at cats! That's plain rude!"

"WHEE!" Weirdkit began throwing cake mix at cats.

When he was done throwing things, everyone looked like they could be turned into cakes. Weirdkit cooked his sister, Tinykit, and she looked like a cake shaped like a cat when she got out of the oven.

"Somebody help me..." she muttered.

Weirdkit used a claw to scrape some cake off of Tinykit. "Tasty, but furry." he mewed.

"That's creepy."

"Indeed."

* * *

**Yes, I know this is rather strange, but this story's supposed to be weird... :)**


	86. onto the plane!

**Sorry I haven't updated in three days, I couldn't think of what to write. But... here it is!**

**And wow... this story has 100 favorites! I can't believe something I wrote could get so popular!**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Berryheart101: Of course you can make a parody! I'm not the Queen of Parodies or something. As long as you aren't taking my ideas, it's all fine. You didn't need to ask for permision.**

**alleycute: Yeah, I get what you're saying.**

**Chococrazygrrl8: Whatever... surprise me :)**

**Silverstrekofthunderclan: You figured out how to post things... You just have to write the story and put it up. ;)**

**Ivyheart and crazycat1000: You came a little too late, I said I couldn't accept OCs after chapter 84. Sorry.**

**Kylestar: Seriously, it's fine. It's not like you have to review or something. :)**

**Oh, new poll's up! It's for "ugliest".**

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" screamed Bramblestar. "WE ARE GOING TO FLORIDA!"

"YAY!" screamed the cats.

"What's Florida?" asked Stupidkit.

Everyone died from shock.

Then they revived.

"Stupidkit, Florida is the home of Disney World! And Universal Studios, and warmth... they don't have proper leaf-bares there!" mewed Cloudtail.

"Oh."

"Well, what are we waiting for? TO THE PLANE!" screamed Bramblestar. They ran to the plane. Of course, the other Clans and the Tribes were there.

Jayfeather, Snowkit, and Deafkit ran into the cockpit. The cats were flying "Air B&D". Which meant the cats who worked for that airline were either blind, deaf, or both. "B" stood for "blind", and "D" stood for deaf. But I'm sure you got that.

"Welcome, passengers, to flight 152 to Orlando! I'm your pilot, Jayfeather, and my co-pilots/flight attendants are Snowkit and Deafkit! So, we're about to take off! Buckle up, turn off your electronic devices... and yeah, that's it! When we reach an altitude of... um... I kinda forget, but- SNOWKIT, NOT THE MANUAL! Oh, StarClan help me... um, we're going to be taking off now. The flight attendants will be coming around taking beverage orders and giving out bags of peanuts and that type of stuff when we have reached the proper altitude! Bon voyage!"

As soon as the plane started moving, the kits began to scream, "ARE WE THERE YET?! ARE WE THERE YET?!"

"No, we aren't even in the air yet." Ferncloud mewed patiently.

"Oh." the kits mewed. "Well, can we have some candy?"

"No, but you can get some snacks when the flight attendants come around."

"Oh." the kits mewed. "When will they come around?"

"When we reach a safe altitude."

"What's that?"

"The pilot can't remember."

"When will he?"

"I don't know."

The plane lifted off the runway.

"FREEDOM!" screamed the kits. They unbuckled and began running around the plane.

"No! Kits! We aren't at the cruising altitude yet!" Ferncloud chased after them.

"Well, now we are at cruising altitude, feel free to move about the cabin. The flight attendants will be coming around shortly." Jayfeather mewed.

Snowkit and Deafkit began to wander down the aisle.

"Do you want anything to eat or drink, M'am?" Deafkit asked Squirrelflight.

"I'll have pepsi, please." Squirrelflight mewed.

"What?"

"Pepsi."

"Huh?"

"Pepsi."

"WHAT?! SPEAK UP- I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"

"PEPSI!" roared Squirrelflight. "PEPSI, PEPSI, PEPSI!"

"I'll just get you a random drink." Deafkit muttered, and wandered off. Squirrelflight face-pawed.

Then Jayfeather's voice came over the loudspeaker. "Attention, cats, we are facing some minor turbulence, so buckle up!" Then the plane started bouncing up and down and up and down and up and down... and well, you get the idea.

The kits paws shot into the air."WHEE!" they screamed. "What a fun roller coaster!"

Ferncloud leaned over and whispered to Dustpelt. "Let them think that."

Jayfeather's voice came on again. "We're going to be landing in Orlando shortly. I know that this is a very stinky airline, but on behalf of the crew, I thank you for flying Air B&D."

"How are we landing so quickly?" called Brackenfur.

"We're crash-landing." Jayfeather mewed simply. "Duh."

They began to fall from the sky.

"WHEE!" the kits screamed. They had slipped out of their seatbelts and their backs were pressed against the top of the plane, their paws out.

"This is an even better roller coaster!" yelled Stupidkit.

All of the other cats began to scream. Then they crashed. "CRASH-LAND!" yowled the kits, and high-pawed each other. They stumbled out of the plane, whooping.

"We aren't flying with that airline back, are we?" growled Squirrelflight.

Bramblestar grinned sheepishly. "Um..."

Squirrelflight face-pawed.

"We're in Orlando!" Bramblestar smiled weakly. He tried to make a convincing smile, but all he was thinking, _I'm dead_.

* * *

**Okay, the ending was strange, but they're in Orlando! What fun! You can request things you want the cats to do... even if they haven't been in this yet (HINT, HINT)**


	87. TO THE MAGIC KINGDOM!

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Kylestar: why are you insulted? I just meant that you don't have to review every single chapter. People get busy or get involved with other things, I can respect that.**

**Chococrazygrrl8: Universal is in both places. **

**ClearDrops: I guess they are. I don't have as much time to update as usual.**

**Spottedfur of Windclan: Well, it's good he stopped. I actually thought he would start spamming me once I said that! **

**Coolkat123: Sorry, I'm not accepting cats, even if they are Disney workers.**

**Kitten Riding Panda: Sorry, I'm not taking script things... but if you were just trying to show it to me, it was funny :)**

**Jayleaf1: No...**

**Roseheart4271: Sorry, but no. The only cat I may accept would be Sodakit, but he would be another one of Ferncloud's kits. **

**Okay, so I'm going to do like, a chapter for every theme park. I think it's different than the talent show and court case thing because they can do different things, where a lot of court cases and talents got repeated.**

**Also, expect updates to be sparotic. I. Next week, I'm going to be EXTREMELY busy. So expect little to no updates, but the week after that, I think can garuntee at least three chapters (and they'll be longer than this one) in the same day.**

**The next poll is up, it's for the "cutest kit".**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any Disney things, Warriors, or OCs. Only my cats and Ferncloud's kits.**

* * *

"Okay, folks, today we are going to the Magic Kingdom!" Bramblestar grinned.

"YAY!" screamed the cats. They ran to the Magic Kingdom.

"OH MY GOSHNESS IT'S MICKEY MOUSE!" screamed Sugarkit. She ran over to Mickey and began to squeeze the life out of him. "YOU'RE MY IDOL!" she squealed.

"Line up for a picture with Mickey, kits!" Ferncloud purred.

"YAY!" the kits screamed, and got into a line.

"ROAR!" screamed Ninjakit, running up to Mickey. He bared his teeth (they took his nunchucks away. Even though he was a kit, security saw his criminal record and decided they couldn't trust him).

"A KIT'S GONNA KILL ME!" wailed Mickey, and fled.

"Poor Mickey." sighed Ferncloud. "Well, at least they can get a replacement!"

"That's the one Mickey there is!" wailed Smallkit.

"No, no, sweetie, that's a cat in costume." mewed Ferncloud.

"MICKEY'S FAKE?!" wailed the kits. "No, no! Well, on-screen he's real, but so many cats wanted to meet him, he had to get some assistants to help him." Ferncloud mewed.

"Oh." the kits calmed down.

In front of the castle, the princesses were doing a show.

"OMG MAH BFFLS!" squealed Berrynose, who had a "Sleeping Beauty" dress on. He ran up to the princesses and began to hug them and kiss them and flirt with them. (Remember, he's a tom)

The princesses screamed and ran away.

"Awkward..." muttered the rest of the cats.

Then Firestar ran into the castle with Berrynose and they both got princess makeovers.

"Don't I look gorgeous?" Firestar fluffed his fur.

Sandstorm moved away.

"LET'S GO TO SPACE MOUNTAIN!" screamed Bramblestar.

They all ran to Space Mountain and the roller coaster started.

"THAT WAS AWESOME!" yowled the kits. "LET'S GO ON IT AGAIN!"

Several cats began to barf. "AGAIN!" the others yowled. "AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN!"

They went on it fifty billion times.

By then, all of the adult cats except for Rootstar, Cinderblaze, Cinderxlion00isawesome, and Starstar (you know, they're practically still kits) had vomited at least fifty times.

But the kits were still screaming, "MORE, MORE, MORE!"

"No..." moaned the others.

The kits began to cry.

"Hm... let's go on the Dumbo Ride!" Ferncloud ushered her kits to the ride.

They went to the Dumbo Ride and leapt onto it.

"Ooh, I hope it goes upside down!" squealed Energykit.

The ride started.

The kits pouted. "All we're doing is going around in circles." pouted Grumpykit.

After the adults recovered, they went on Splash Mountain.

"WHEE!" screamed the kits. "Wait... we haven't done anything yet."

Then they plunged down the waterfall.

"WHEE!" screamed the kits. "THIS IS MORE LIKE IT!" As soon as it was finished, they screamed, "AGAIN, AGAIN!" So they splashed and splashed and splashed and splashed... and well, you get the idea.

"MY FUR IS SOAKING!" screamed Angelhalo. "OMG THIS IS NOT A GOOD LOOK FOR ME!" she ran off to the bathroom.

"ONE MORE TIME!" yowled the kits.

"Okay, but be sure to buckle up!" a worker warned them.

But why bother listening?

When they went down, the kits slipped out of the cart and just fell down the waterfall.

"WHEE!" screamed the kits. "THAT WAS FUN! AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN!"

Everyone was soaking wet and then they went to the Space Ranger Spin.

"POW, POW, POW!" screamed BuzzLightYearkit. He began to shoot the aliens with his blaster. When they were done, he screamed, "HIGH SCORE! YESH!" They went on it again and again, again.

Then they went on the Barnstormer. "This is better than most of the roller coasters!" sighed Scardykit in relief (not that I don't love the Barnstormer). Then the poor kit fell out of the cart and began to wail loudly.

BuzzLightYearkit used his wings, dove down, and saved his brother.

They went on it fifty billion times, then went on every single other ride. Then they raided the gift shops.

The kits were wearing "Disney, 2013" t-shirts and had a bunch of toys. The others had everything else. Gangsterkit was wearing a flat top hat with a picture of Mickey with a blue-and-purple mohawk.

"That's not appropriate for kits..." mewed Rootstar awkwardly.


	88. ISLAND OF ADVENTURE!

**I am so sorry I didn't update- I couldn't. Again, I was very busy and what happened in Boston didn't help anything at all... so I'm afraid that the three-chapter update is out of question. But I will be going back to regular updates. (This is the longest I've gone without updating... a week and it seems as though people are panicking) **

**I hope you and your families are okay- I know a lot of people go to watch the Boston Marathon- and THANK STARCLAN for the Watertown police for capturing the second brother (the alive one, I mean). **

**And Texans- so... an explosion that was recorded as a 2.8 on the Richter scale... hope anybody in Texas who reads this is OK and their families are too.**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Mossfang: Haha, no. But as a matter of fact, I was there. I asked Victoria if she read fanfiction. I had been hoping I could show her my stories. And, I was also considering going around asking people if they were on Fanfiction. XD Yes, I was considering doing that.**

**Ds3Dstar and Guest: Not accepting OCs! Sorry!**

**Guest: Thank you for your opinion. Now, let's see you write 88 chapters and counting of funny and random things. I DARE YOU. :P**

**RicekitxTofukit: No, actually, the only thing I'm getting from this is that (I think) there is a three-way argument between you, Kylestar, and Sparrowing.**

**Moonsoul da great: 59,849 views.**

**Ericclaw: Kind of the intention!**

**Chococrazygrrl8: There's a box with a line through it at the top of the document manager. **

**One more thing: OH MAH STARCLAN 2000 REVIEWS OH MAH STARCLAN 2000 REVIEWS YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME VIRTUAL CANDY FOR ALL! WHEE! YAY SPARROWING! THANK YOU!**

**ONTO ZE CHAPTER!**

**(PS. They spend most of the day at the "Wizarding World of Harry Potter". I'm a huge Potterhead, so... yeah)**

**Oh, and the next poll is up- for the "sanest". **

* * *

"NOW, TO ISLAND OF ADVENTURE!" screamed Bramblestar. As if he was Superman, he leaped into the air and flew there.

"YAY!" yowled the cats, and they, too, flew.

They ran through the entrance and then pelted all the way to the "Wizarding World of Harry Potter".

"INTO HOGWARTS!" screamed Bramblestar, and flew into Hogwarts.

Everyone else cheered and followed.

"OH MY STARCLAN GRYFFINDOR IS WINNING THE HOUSE CUP!" screamed Hawkfire, bouncing up and down like an excited kit.

"SLYTHERIN'S SECOND!" screamed DracoMalfoykit. "COME ON, BEAT GRYFFINDOR!"

"No. Just no." Hawkfire mewed, and continued to walk through Hogwarts.

Then they got to the ride.

"AHHH!" screamed Wimpykit. "DEMENTORS!"

Rootstar randomly pulled out a wand and screamed, "DIE DEMENTORS, DIE!"

Starstar rolled her eyes. "Gimme that." she mewed. "EXPECTO PATRONUM!"

Nothing happened.

"Well, we know that you're not a witch." Bramblestar grinned.

Starstar slapped him. "Shut up, Snape. I may not be a witch, but I'm still the donut queen, so you must respect me."

"I'M NOT SNAPE!" roared Bramblestar. He puffed out his chest. "If anything, I'm Sirius Black!"

"I thought Sirius Black was manly, brave, and unafraid of death. And you are none of the above." snorted Squirrelflight.

Bramblestar growled. Then he screamed. "A DRAGON! SAVE ME SAVE ME!" he clutched onto Squirrelflight.

"Yes, my brave Sirius Black." Squirrelflight rolled her eyes and patted his head. Bramblestar whimpered some more.

Then the ride stopped and they got out.

"THAT WAS AWESOME!" screamed Awesomekit. "Now for the "Triwizard Challenge"!" grinned Bravekit.

The majority of the adult cats, again, except for Rootstar, Starstar, Cinderblaze, and Cinderxlion00isawesome threw up on that one.

Then they went on "Flight of the Hippogriff". Nobody threw up on that one.

Next, they raided all of the gift shops. Hawkfire wound up in robes that looked like they had belonged to Dumbledore. She had made poor Whitestreak put on an outfit that must've belonged to Professor McGonagall. Bramblestar was dressed up like Snape, Mayorstar as Flitwick, Perfectstar as Madam Pomfrey, Mistystar as Professor Sprout, Onestar was dressed up as Madam Hooch, and Blackstar was Professor Trelawny. The cats burst out laughing at Whitestreak, Onestar, and Blackstar. They did look quite ridiculous. Rootstar had on Ravenclaw robes and Luna's strange glasses. HarryPotterkit had on Quidditch robes, as did GinnyWeasleykit and RonWeasleykit. HermioneGrangerkit had Gryffindor robes on, as did the rest of ThunderClan. ShadowClan had Slytherin robes, RiverClan had Ravenclaw robes, and WindClan had Hufflepuff. RichClan was another Gryffindor Clan, and HotClan was Ravenclaw.

"How strange those cats are." Lavenderbreeze whispered to Jaystorm. Together, they snuck out of the park.

Then the cats had a bunch of butterbeer and were hyper for the rest of the day.

They went to the Jurassic Park area (you're welcome, Supergrower XD). They went on the aerial ride and flew over the area. Then they went on the ride with the T-Rex and other dinos and splashed down the waterfall. They went on all of the rides about fifty times, courtesy of Dinokit, who refused to leave the area. Eventually, they just ditched her and went elsewhere.

Next, they went to the Marvel area and went on the Spiderman ride, then the Hulk Rollercoaster as soon as the coaster did it's first corkscrew, the cats threw up- even the kits. And although they were all a little green when they got off, the kits insisted that they go on again. And again. And again. And again.

Then they stumbled over to the Dr. Seuss area. They went on the train ride and carousel. "Not as fun." Epickit frowned.

* * *

**Don't forget to vote on the poll!**


	89. UNIVERSAL STUDIOS!

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Meow: At least you've been to Disney! :)**

**NinjaPiplup: Haha, that's a good idea. I'll probably use that, but once they get back to their home.**

**Sparrowing: Okay, I was confused.**

**Shimmerstar: Butterbeer's good! Too bad you puked. :(**

** Supergrower508: Um... that's a little awkward...**

**Jayleaf1: There isn't a full theme park, but Islands of Adventure has a pretty big section for HP.**

**Kitten: Oh my.**

**Silverstreak of ThunderClan: Soon. I know you submitted her before I said no more OCs.**

**Mossfang: Yeah... I think I remember that.**

**skystepthegreat: Again, I'm not accepting OCs. **

**MoonpoolOrHalflight: I think they'll be back home when they do the contest results. There's only three theme parks left (Animal Kingdom, Hollywood Studios, and Epcot), and there's more than three polls left.**

**The next poll is for the weirdest!**

* * *

"Why wouldn't you guys like the Dr. Seuss area?" Rootstar complained.

"Because it's simple." snorted Extravagantkit.

"And childish."

"You are children."

"Kits."

"Whatever. I'm practically a kit but I still love the Dr. Seuss area."

"Nobody cares what you think."

"Well, nobody gives a bean about your tacos."

"ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ."

"Um... okay?"

"ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA."

"What?"

"TO UNIVERSAL STUDIOS!" yowled Bramblestar, barging between them.

Yowling, "TACOS! NACHOS! SOUR SPRAY! CHEEZE-ITS! MICE KRISPIE TREATS! CHINESE FOOD!" Rootstar flew after him.

The first place they went was the Hollywood-themed area and they went into the "I Love Lucy" tribute building.

"I LOVE LUCY!" yowled Cinderblaze randomly.

"Um..."

"I'm just saying the name of the show." Cinderblaze mewed simply.

"Okay..."

"Lucy's a babe." Freakishlyoldface mewed dreamily. "I remember when the show was still running... oh, how I miss it."

"That's not appropriate!" screamed Ferncloud. Since there were no trees in the building, she stuffed her kits behind the glass of "I Love Lucy" props.

"That's strange..." Bramblestar bit his lip.

"How'd she get them in there without breaking the glass?" wondered Sorreltail.

"Magic." Ferncloud purred.

"Okay." Sorreltail shrugged.

Then they went on the "Rockin' Roller Coaster". The kits didn't bother to buckle up and fell out of their seats as the coaster moved vertically up. "WHEE!" screamed Excitedkit, pulling a plug that deployed a parachute. The rest of the kits did the same. All of the other cats, except for Rootstar, Starstar, Cinderblaze, and Cinderxlion00iawsesome threw up.

Then they went to the Simpson's area and played a bunch of carnival games. But since they're rigged, they didn't win, so they just stole all of the prizes.

Then they went on the Simpson's ride.

"OH MY STARCLAN WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" screamed Bramblestar, clutching onto Squirrelflight, as the ride started to bounce up and down.

"THAT WAS AWESOME!" yowled the kits. "AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN!"

So they went on it again, again, again.

After that, they went on the "Despicable Me" ride.

After the ride, Amazingkit mewed, "I liked it, but the Simpson's one was better."

"Yeah." the kits agreed, and then screamed, "LET'S GO TO THE SIMPSON'S RIDE AGAIN!"

Then, reading the map, Blossomfall commented, "They celebrate Mardi Gras for almost a month-and-a-half after it's actually celebrated!"

"Whatever." Anti-Frenchkit rolled his eyes. Blossomfall shrugged.

"Next, we shall go to the E.T ride!" Mayorstar announced.

Although they expected it to be very fun, it's one of the oldest rides in the park so it was actually rather boring.

"Blah." Modernkit stuck his tongue out.

However, Rootstar was having the time of her life, her paws in the air, screaming as though she was on a high-speed roller coaster. "WHAT FUN!" she shouted.

The other cats face-pawed.

They went on Shrek's 4-D ride and the Men in Black ride.

"WHEE!" the kits screamed as they spun around. "AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN!" they yowled, when they got off the ride.

And we all know who tossed their cookies after "again, again, again".


	90. Bramblestar's Secret

**HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN SINCE I UPDATED?! DAYS, WEEKS, MONTHS, YEARS, OR CENTURIES?! *spazzes* Pineapples! Peach cobbler! WORMTAIL! Nah, just six days ago (although I think that's a second to when I hadn't updated for over a week).**

**Okay, this is the Animal Kingdom! And the place where we learn about Bramblestar's secret...**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Sparrowing, RicekitxTofukit, and Kylestar: You guys were having an eye-narrowing contest. I wasn't sure what that was about.**

**Kylestar: Cool!**

**Goldenarrow of SeaClan: Sorry, I'm not accepting OCs.**

**Jayleaf1: The second Universal Studios theme park in Florida. AND YOU'RE GONNA PLAY QUIDDITCH?! OH MY POTTERHEADS TAKE ME WITH YOU!**

**Shoutfinder: No, I promised that it wouldn't end. And I'm trying to figure out whether you like this story or not... **

**Skystep of StormClan: I don't know. Did you suggest a cat who likes Febreeze? And called yourself "skystepthegreat"?**

**Eaglefan2569: Look, I know you wanted Fallstar in, but you submitted her after the deadline, and I'm not making excpetions. Sorry.**

**Acornflight: Why do you sigh?**

**Strikewing: That's for me to know and you to find out. The winner will be announced when the others are.**

**Golden: Plagiarism doesn't happen very often- especially when it comes to Fanfiction. The most plagiarism I've seen is someone copying "Tales of Beedle and the Bard" from Harry Potter. But plenty of people have reported it. You could always copyright it, I guess. If someone copies, people jump to the occasion pretty quickly, and the FF administrators see the reports, they'll remove the copied story. As for what you do, do whichever you'll enjoy writing more. But if you do do random chapters, you can't take my ideas. **

**New poll is up: for the "hopeless flirters".**

* * *

"Okay, folks, we are going to the Animal Kingdom today!" Perfectstar announced.

Bramblestar smiled dreamily. "My second wife lives there!"

"I'm your first wife." snorted Squirrelflight.

"Noooooo, there's Penny, my first wife, oh, she was a hottie, my second one was Flora, she wasn't as good-looking, but she could reach things in very high places-"

"Are you implying that your second wife was a giraffe?" Squirrelflight asked, bewildered.

"Yes. But after I divorced her, I went onto Alexis, and what a babe she was! Then there was Maysilee- oh, she's there, too..." Bramblestar droned on and on about his 652 wives before Squirrelflight. One was in prison, two were now supermodels, apparently he'd had a short-term relationship with Perfectstar but then she dumped him so she could flirt with more toms because of her hotness, he'd gotten married to an elephant from the San Diego Zoo before realizing that their relationship wouldn't work, and he had about five wives in Animal Kingdom- a giraffe who apparently had given birth to his child, a tiger who had gotten mad at him and tried to eat him on their honeymoon, that was Maysilee, a penguin who ditched him for Tuxedo Sam (Hello Kitty), a peacock who turned out to be cheating on him ("you can't trust peacocks because of their feathers" states Bramblestar), and Monica- a 20-foot long python who tried to suffocate him, but Bramblestar thought she was hugging him so he got married to her then Tawnypelt slapped him and told him that Monica was trying to kill him, and since Bramblestar thought the evidence was "overwhelming", he just fled.

"Ooh, I never divorced her! No wonder she keeps texting me!" Bramblestar exclaimed.

Tawnypelt face-pawed. "Well, you can get divorced now. We're going back there."

"Yeah, okay." Bramblestar agreed. When they walked in, they noticed there was a new exhibit.

"Ooh, can we go there first?" Rootstar squealed like a kit.

Ferncloud, who was practically mother to everyone now, nodded, and patted Rootstar on the head. "Of course, sweetie."

So they made their way over to the new exhibit.

Turns out, it was cats. No, not like lions or tigers or cheetahs or anything like that, but cats. Like the Clans.

"Hello!" Stupidkit waved to them. "Do you speak cat?" he made motions that indicated that he was saying these things.

"We're not stupid." snorted one of the cats. "Of course we can speak cat. We are cats."

"Oh."

"I am Vegankit, kit of Ricekit and Tofukit!" announced a green-pelted kit with ginger splotches. "That's not appropriate..." Rootstar mewed, wide-eyed. Everyone else nodded.

"I am Prettycolors, and my fur can change colors!" mewed a she-cat, who's light blue fur faded into a mint green.

"Cool..." Bramblestar mewed, entranced.

"I am SweetNSpicykit!" mewed a cute, small, she-cat.

"Aw..." the cats "awwed".

"And I am Silverstar!" purred a silvery-gray she-cat.

"You remind me of Silverstream, but you're hotter!" Graystripe mewed dreamily. Silverstream slapped him.

"I get that a lot. Well, not the part about Silverstream, but that I'm hot." Silverstar mewed.

"You definitely should!" Bramblestar mewed. "Hi, I'm Bramblestar, your new mate!" he wiggled his eyebrows.

"No thank you." Silvertail frowned and inched away from him.

"I am Piplupwing, Jayfeather's apprentice!" announced a silver she-cat, more silver than Silvertail but not as pretty.

"HOW MANY APPRENTICES DO I HAVE NOW?!" yowled Jayfeather.

"Two, I think." Leafpool mewed.

"Oh. I thought it was more." Jayfeather sighed. "Because it seems like it."

"Awkward..."

"I am Lightpelt, Darkfur's mate!" announced another she-cat.

"Heehee, your name is kinda opposite of Darkfur's!" Cinderblaze giggled.

Lightpelt rolled her eyes, her eyes red.

"YOU HAVE POWERS TOO?!" yowled Cinderblaze. She then bowed to Lightpelt. "SPARE ME, O GREAT ONE!"

"And I am Sprinklefart!" mewed a tom. He had matted fur with sprinkles stuck to it. Then he farted, and sprinkles came out.

"HA HA, HE FARTED SPRINKLES!" laughed Immaturekit.

"I am Wildcall, Fireleaf's brother!" then he did the "Call of the Wild" directed to Dustpelt.

He began to scream and run around in circles.

"Daddy's gone bonkers again..." Anotherkit mewed, eyes wide.

"I am Wafflesarebetterthanpancakes!" a really hot tom announced.

"PRETTY!" screamed the she-cats. The toms face-pawed and slapped them.

"I am Onyxstar, and I can control minds!"

"Oh dear..." Bramblestar groaned.

"And I am Angelkit!" mewed a little white kit sweetly.

"Aw..." the cats "awwed".

"I am Grammarwarrior!" mewed a hot gray tom.

"HOTNESS!" screamed the she-cats. The toms slapped them.

"I am Eviltacos, and I HATE TACOS!" he screamed. Mexicankit was munching on a taco, and he stomped over to him, snatched the taco, threw it to the ground, and jumped on it.

Mexicankit began to cry, and Ferncloud promised to buy him a new taco, so he calmed down.

"I am Rainfire!" mewed a nerdy-looking she-cat.

"Hi, I'm NumNumkit!" NumNumkit mewed.

"Would you like an orange?"

"I'm allergic."

"Okay then."

"I am Flamingfeather!" announced a ginger she-cat with a big, fluffy tail that looked like fire.

"OMSC FIRE!" screamed Bramblestar. He ran to Flamingfeather with a bucket of water and dumped it on her tail. Her tail looked wet but remained the same. "AN UNQUENCHABLE FIRE!" sobbed Bramblestar. He patted Flamingfeather on the back. "I am so sorry you had to perish this way."

Flamingfeather snorted. "My tail always looks like this! It isn't actually on fire!"

"Oh." Bramblestar mewed.

"I am Echowing and this is Silverheart! We are mates!" Echowing, a silver she-cat with a black stripe down her back mewed.

"And I am Karatekit, best friend of Ninjakit!"

"How ya, doing, bro?" Ninjakit and Karatekit fist-pumped.

"I am Healthykit!" mewed another she-kit.

"ANOTHER HEALTHY CAT?!" gasped Tofukit. "YAY!" she hugged Healthykit, along with Tofukit and Vegankit.

"I am Catforyou and this is my mate, Valencat!" announced a tom.

"You have a funny name." giggled Moleohimustbecomingdownwithacold.

"And you don't?" Catforyou scoffed.

"No..." Moleohimustbecomingdownwithacold mewed, then ran away.

"I am Sweetforever and I-" she paused, staring at Foreveraloneforever. "You're pretty!" she mewed dreamily.

"I know. But you and I seem to be the only cats who can see this!" Foreveraloneforever mewed impatiently.

A silver-and-purple tom walked up. "I AM ANNOYINGSTAR!" he sang, opera-like.

"That's weird." Bramblestar mewed.

"And annoying." Squirrelflight agreed.

"I am Runningbrook, and this is my mate, Creeksplash! We have kits named Eaglekit, Hawkkit, and Falconkit!" mewed a very pretty she-cat.

"A FAMILY OF HOTTIES!" screamed the cats. "We're married, and our kits are off-limits!" snapped Runningbrook. The cats shrank back. "Okay..." Blackstar put on a pouty face. "You didn't have to be mean about it..." "I am Derpyeyes, Jayfeather's apprentice!" mewed another cat. "HOW MANY IS IT NOW!?" yowled Jayfeather, pulling out his fur. Leafpool sighed. "Three." "And I am Waterbone." mewed a she-cat quietly. "You're shy." Stupidkit giggled manically. "Um..." Waterbone moved away.

"I am Meadowstream!" mewed another pretty she-cat.

"PRETTY!" screamed the toms, then they bowed to her. The she-cats slapped them.

"And I am Wildthunder!" announced another pretty she-cat.

The toms bowed to her and the she-cats slapped them.

Then they went around, Bramblestar insisting they look for his wives. They easily found Flora, because she had a baby cat with a very long neck, Maysilee was easy enough to find because she had a Tuxedo Sam plush by her side, and Monica was easy, too, because she was suffocating a lot of things, then Bramblestar told her they were getting divorced and she tried to suffocate him. Then they found the tiger ripping apart meat. Bramblestar didn't bother to say "hi", he just ran away. Then they found the peacock, who he slapped because she was cheating on her current mate and then she attacked him.

Then they went on the rides, but since Animal Kingdom is mainly a giant zoo...

"Next stop, Epcot!" announced Bramblestar.

* * *

**Well, that's the last of the OCs! Please tell me if I missed your OC (if you submitted it before I said you couldn't).**

**Oh, whoever submitted Grammarnazi, I didn't really like the name, and I don't really want to write about a cat with such a name, so I just changed it to Grammarwarrior. Hope that's okay.**

**And don't forget to vote! ;)**

**PS. oOJayfeatheroO how would you feel if Sweetforever and Foreveraloneforever got married?**


	91. TO THE NEXT THEME PARK!

**Wow, I didn't realize I'd missed so many cats! I think something funky's going on with my computer... I've been trying to find one review and I can't seem to!**

**Reply to reviews:**

**Grasstar of WindClan: I probably didn't see the review with those cats, because I have a vague recollection of them but I don't remember seeing a review with the forms.**

**People who submitted cats who got mates but not kits: Yes, I know kits weren't in it, but there was just way too many people who wanted mates to appear and kits, too. They will come in later chapters.**

**Trev12345: Yeah, I know her powers, but I still thought it would be cool for her to have eyes like Darkfur.**

**Petalfall11 and Griffinblitz****: I'm not accepting OCs! Sorry!**

**Strikewing: Echofrost was already in, with the last group of cats.**

**And, last but not least... *alarm blares* FLAMER ALERT! FLAMER ALERT! Haha, but seriously...**

**MissAmazing: Wow. Just because you can understand what's written in my story doesn't mean it has bad spelling. Congratulations undermining your own argument. **

**AND I QUOTE: "U call dis a story? U are horrible at writing! U don't even no how too spel good. U are n idit. Shut up!"**

** Pardon me, but what you wrote clarifies who's who here. There are 9 spelling mistakes in this sentence, and some grammar issues as well. If you're going to tell me that I've got bad spelling, then at least spell correctly yourself. GROW UP.**

**(PS. Acornflight, this troll really isn't hurting my feelings. But if they're going to give garbage to me, they'll get some right back... and actually, it's kind of funny that the flamer had the NERVE to say something like that when their own spelling was so stinky.)**

**ONTO THE CHAPTER! AND THE NEW POLL- FOR THE FUNNIEST- SO PLEASE VOTE! **

* * *

"EPCOT!" screamed Bramblestar, and he barrelled through the cats, and then crashed into more.

"I am Epicstar!" a she-cat mewed. "YADDAYADDABLABBABLABBA!"

"MY BEST FRIEND!" screamed Rootstar, and then hugged Epicstar.

"And I am Acornflight!"

"I am Silverstreak!" mewed a pretty silver she-cat.

"WHATEVER!" yowled Bramblestar. "I WANNA GO TO EPCOT!" he ran into the park.

The cats looked at each other to Bramblestar, to each other, and to where Bramblestar had disappeared.

"WHY NOT?!" screamed Rootstar.

"LET'S GOOOOO!" yowled Echofrost.

So they ran in.

They went into that golf-ball like thingy at the front of Epcot and although they were expecting something really exciting as if it was space mountain. But it wasn't.

But... Shimmerstar, Grasstar, Hawkfrost, and Tigerstar had ripped off a big part of the track and then they plunged down.

"SAVE US!" screamed Bramblestar. "STARCLAN SAVE US!"

"STARCLAN IS I, YET I CAN'T SAVE YOU!" yowled Bluestar.

"WHEE!" screamed the kits, as usual, having no understanding that they could be very well plunging to their deaths.

Then Minecraftstar, wearing a Superman outfit, flew in, and then caught the carts and put them on the track. Then he fixed the track and they were on their way.

"MY HERO!" sobbed Bramblestar, flinging his paws around Minecraftstar's neck and kissing him. "That's what the she-cats do in the movies- not the toms." Squirrelflight told him.

"Oh. Then..." he took Squirrelflight's paws and put them around Minecraftstar's neck. "MY HERO!" he sobbed in an impersonation of Squirrelflight. Then he smushed Squirrelflight's lips onto Minecraftstar's cheek.

"That's just creepy..." Minecraftstar inched away.

Then they went on "Soarin'" and the kits nearly fell off near hot-air balloons because they weren't taking proper safety precautions.

After, they went to France.

A bunch of cats walked out looking very... French.

And they went to all of the other places.

All the cats walked out looking very... other places. For dinner, they went to the Beer Gardens in Germany.

"YAY!" screamed the kits. "A GARDEN OF BEER!"

"_Noooo_, kits, there isn't a "garden of beer", that's just the name of the restaurant!" Ferncloud told them.

The kits frowned. "Aww..."

"But there is alcohol in there!" Bramblestar told them.

"YAY!" screamed the kits.

"But you won't be drinking it. You aren't of age." Ferncloud told them.

The kits frowned. "Aww..." Then they went in.

And when the performers on the stage took a break and stupidly left their instruments where they weren't exactly safe, the kits stole them, performed several songs that just sounded like animals attempting to sing, then smashed the instruments and threw the pieces into the crowd after that.

Then the performers came up with the manager.

"You broke these performer's equipment... you shall pay!" roared the manager.

"No thank you." Bramblestar mewed. "And we won't pay for dinner, either."

With that, they fled, and that was their day at Epcot.


	92. Chapter 92

**Reply to reviews:**

**Destiny Willowleaf, Iceflash, and Milarion Forever: I'm not accepting OCs! Sorry!**

**Griffinblitz: The reason that your OCs are not being accepted are because you submitted them after the deadline. The cats I put in were the last of the OCs who had been submitted before it. Even if you only want one in, she cannot be accepted. Sorry.**

**Trev12345: When the kits come in is my decision. Please try to be patient. **

**Misty the Grey Kitten: I know that, but this story really isn't supposed to be that realistic, is it? :)**

**Chococrazygrrl8: One of the four Disney theme parks in Florida. **

**Silverstar: All righty, then. As for her appearing regularly, I'll try, but no garuntees. And you need to answer a question for her to have powers. **

**Windyspirit of Moonclan: The only cats who could be accepted would be the kits, and they would be names of kits in Ferncloud's litter, but they wouldn't be anything special. **

**Strikewing: Echofrost has been in before- with... Bananafeather, I think? (Unless I'm having deja vu...)**

**Spottedfur of WindClan: I wrote you a review telling you what to do. Remember to ignore the spammers.**

**Guest: As random as it is, that's the intention of this story. As I said, if she gives garbage, she'll get some back. She didn't even complain that the story's confusing. **

**SC 3 TC: I mentioned that I couldn't find some reviews. Who are your cats?**

**Next poll is up! For the "evillest".**

* * *

"I HAVE A SONG TO SING!" yowled Lionblaze.

"What?" asked Squirrelflight.

"GATHER 'ROUND, Y'ALL!" Lionblaze screamed.

"What?" growled Cloudtail. "I haven't slept enough!"

Lionblaze ignored him. "This is a blues song that I wrote." he took a deep breath. He then mewed in a mournful voice, "My mother doesn't love me, my brother doesn't love me, nobody loves me..."

The cats stared.

"My father got run over by a car, my dog ran away, nobody loves me..."

"Hoo, boy." Hollyleaf face-pawed.

"Hollyleaf fell off a cliff and got eaten by a shark, Hollyleaf fell off a cliff and got eaten by a shark, nobody loves me..."

"Oh no..." Dovewing bit her lip.

"Dovewing pushed Hollyleaf off the cliff, Dovewing pushed Hollyleaf off the cliff, nobody loves meeeeeee!"

Nobody applauded.

"Hey!" Lionblaze pouted.

"The polite thing to do is applaud!"

"Not when you're saying I fell off a cliff!" growled Hollyleaf.

"And I pushed her off it!" snarled Dovewing.

"And you say I got run over by a car!" Crowfeather growled.

"And apparently, I don't love you!" Leafpool sighed.

"Well, it's true that I don't." grumbled Jayfeather.

"But it didn't happen!" protested Lionblaze.

"YET." hissed the cats. They started to advance on him.

"AHH!" screamed Lionblaze. He then ran away.

"Haha!" the cats laughed.

Jayfeather was about to continue to run after him, but nobody else did.

"Aww, guys, why'd you stop?" "Because we just meant to scare him." Dovewing sighed.

"But... I really wanted to get him!" whined Jayfeather.

"You're a messed up kitty." sighed Hollyleaf.

Jayfeather purred. "Thank you. I try."

"Yeah, you do..."

* * *

"OH, TOOCOOL AND PRETTYCOLORS, DUMBFACE AND PURDY, AND DARKFUR AND LIGHTPELT ARE GETTING MARRIED!" screamed Lovekit. "GO TO THE CHURCH NOW!" she ordered.

They were all poofed to a church.

Flashparty was the minister. "YADDA YADDA BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH, that was the ceremony. Now, grooms can kiss the brides or the brides can kiss the grooms, whatever floats your boat." he shrugged.

"That's slightly awkward, but, okay..." the cats shrugged and then they kissed each other.

"ROMANCE IS TOO MUCH TO BEAR!" screamed Flashparty. Then he fainted.

"IT IS TOO MUCH!" sobbed Shimmerstar, Tei-Tei, Grasstar, Shadowheart the she-cat, and Icepool. They fainted, too.

"Love shouldn't make you faint!" sighed Lovekit. "It should make you purr, and your eyes turn to hearts, and "aww", and put your paws over your hearts and stuff!"

"Well, love's gross to me!" Flashparty revived and then fainted.

* * *

"I am Burnpool, and these are Cookies, Skyflower, and Spacerocket!" mewed a tortoiseshell she-cat.

"I like your fur!" Dovewing complimented her.

"Well, you know what, I DON'T LIKE YOURS!" screamed Burnpool. Then she took a bite out of bacon.

"That's just evil..." Dovewing walked away.

"That's kinda the intention." Burnpool mewed.

"Why?" Dovewing sighed.

"Well, because I'm evil."

"Why?"

"Because I am."

"Why?"

"You sound like a kit."

"Why?"

"I don't know. You're the one asking "why" way too many times."

"Okay, away from that, why are you evil?"

"Well, I'm related to Grasstar and Tigerstar, so that might help." Burnpool mewed.

"That would make sense." Dovewing nodded.

* * *

**My friend made the blues song- I got permission to use it. She's actually more crazy than me, so she's quite helpful for this story. XD **


	93. Oreos and Taco Bell (none of which I own

**Next poll is up- for the "prankiest"! **

**Reply to reviews:**

**Meow: I have read Percy Jackson and liked it!**

**Iceflash: ...Burnpool isn't in the poll. And I'm not accepting kits- the only thing I'd accept is kit names, and they'd either be used for Ferncloud's or Cutecat's litters, (the deadline was after chapter 84 was posted). And wow, that's cool! Thanks! ...How did you want to help with a chapter (I'm trying to be as original as possible and try to write on my own)? **

**iheartbadboys14: Yes, you had. But I think there's something funky going on with my reviews and I couldn't find a lot of forms. Would you mind re-submitting her?**

**Raven: Yes, you did. But I'm not accepting any OCs like that. The most they could be is warriors in HotClan. They wouldn't be anything special. And yes, people are crazier than me. **

**Spottedfur of Windclan: That's great! Trolls are really just weak- you probably could tell them off yourself as well- are you moderating your reviews now?**

**L: What you're stating is the intention. It's supposed to be a bit confusing- people find this funny. And I know the plot isn't very developed, but the whole point of this story is to just relax and have a laugh. As for the interesting thing, this is just me spitting out ideas that come to my head. This most certainly is not my most professional piece of work. I'm just trying to be random, I'm just lucky that people like the things I'm spitting out onto the keyboard.**

**Silverstar234: You probably did, but I lost it... :P thanks for doing it again! :) **

**FoxspeakerofRiverclan: Well, that's also one of the intentions of the story- to lift you up when you're down. But I'm sorry, I don't think I'll accept OCs again. I let people submit OCs for... hm, let's see... 71 chapters. I feel slightly like I created a freak Create-a-Cat and I probably should have stopped admitting OCs way earlier than I did. But thank you so much for asking before you submitted. Not a lot of people respected that.**

**And Fernlight, upon request of FoxspeakerofRiverclan, how would you feel if Fernlight got cat-napped by That Cat? This wouldn't mean that they had to be mates or anything.**

**Oh, I also posted a chapter for "Prophecy for a New Generation". If you read that, check out the new chapter!**

**All right, so I guess I haven't been clear enough about this OC situation. I don't plan on accepting anymore OCs. Any names that are given might only be used for either Ferncloud's or Cutecat's kits, or warriors in HotClan or RichClan. But there won't be any special introduction for them, and they'll just be cats used when I need someone to say a line, kind of like what I do with Ferncloud's kits. I've got a lot of OCs and I definitely haven't been giving them all enough time in the spotlight. I just can't fit any more in. Sorry. **

* * *

"OREOS!"

"ME WANTS TO GO TO TACO BELL!"

"OHMAHSTARCLAN IT'S A FRUIT LOOP!"

"TAKE A HIKE, YOU NO-GOOD CRACKER JACK!"

Rootstar and Epicstar were having a random spasm.

"FISH HOOKS!"

"DAVID LETTERMAN!"

"I HEART HARRY POTTER!"

"TEAM JACOB!"

"WHEN THE MOON MEETS YOUR EYE LIKE A BIG PIZZA PIE IT'S-"

"SHUT UP!" screamed Ruffledfur.

"You're dumb." giggled Rootstar.

Then Cinderblaze crashed between them "WUPPA GANGNAM STYLE!" she screamed. "Thank you, Grandpa, for dry-cleaning my donuts!"

"COME ON CINDERBLAZE, TELL ME WHERE YOU GET IT DONE!" screeched Startstar, crashing on top of Cinderblaze.

"ME WANTS A RUBER DUCKY!" yowled Rootstar.

"The insaneness is overwhelming." sighed Jaystorm.

"Attention!" called Fernlight. "I have decided to find a date!"

"PICK ME!" screamed Lionblaze, falling from the sky and crashing in front of her.

"NO, ME!" yowled Bramblestar, crashing on Lionblaze.

"ME!"

"ME!" "YARRRRGH!" Fernlight sighed. "Well, I guess I'll have to go through all the toms here." she called, "Line up, boys!"

The toms instantly lined up.

"Hm... too brambley..." Bramblestar slunk away.

"Too Lionblaze..." Lionblaze sobbed and ran away.

"To stalky..." That Cat growled and stomped off.

"No, no, no... NO, NO, NO!" yowled Fernlight. "None of you are worthy of being my mate."

"WHAA!" the toms cried. Moonfeather appeared and rolled her eyes. "It's not like you had a chance with her anyways."

"What about you?" the toms asked.

"Absolutely not." Moonfeather growled.

"But..."

"Bramblestar, we've been through this. I am a medicine cat." Moonfeather pulled out a syringe.

"Yes, yes, we have!" Bramblestar mewed hurriedly. "Sorry, sorry!" he ran away.

"You better be." Moonfeather wrinkled her nose.

"I WANNA CELEBRATE AND LIVE MY LIFE, SAYING AY-YO, BABY LET'S-"

"Shut up, Thornclaw." Bramblestar mewed irritably. "Why? You usually love karaoke night!" Thornclaw mewed.

"But I don't tonight." Bramblestar sighed.

"Why?"

"Because Fernlight and Moonfeather rejected me. And my Cheeze-its are stale. I tried some and they tasted gross!" Bramblestar stuck out his tongue.

"Cheeze-it troubles, eh?" Thornclaw mewed. "Just get some more."

"BUT I RAN OUT OF CASH!" Bramblestar sobbed. "THEY CUT UP MY CREDIT CARD AND I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING IN THE BANK OR MY POCKETS!"

"Okay then..." Thornclaw inched away.

* * *

"DANCING QUEEN, YOUNG AND SWEET- OF THE SEVENTIES!" sang Bramblestar.

"Look, don't go old-school." scoffed Squirrelflight.

"The seventies ain't old girlfriend!" Bramblestar was dressed like a hippie.

"Let's see... this year is 2013, that was the 1970s... so over forty years ago!" Squirrelflight snarled.

"So?"

"IT'S OLD!"

"You have no respect for my likings!" sobbed Bramblestar.

"I don't like old things, I'll respect anything modern you like, but nothing in the 1900s!" Squirrelflight mewed.

"Your ancestors were alive in the 1900s." mewed Bramblestar. "What would they say?"

"OH FORGIVE ME!" screamed Squirrelflight, falling onto her knees. "FORGIVE ME, STARCLAN, FORGIVE ME, ANCESTORS!"

"Haha." Bramblestar giggled.

Squirrelflight frowned. "You sound like a girl."

"Thank you. I try."

"Well, that's not weird at all..." Squirrelflight slowly backed away.


	94. The Candy Jail

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Grasstar of WindClan: That's going to be the surprise! ;)**

**Frequent Fandom Hopper: Ooh, I want one of those! And yes, I would love some! My mustache is fake, in fact. I can tell you my supplier, though, if you'd like. Can I use that in the story?**

**Windyspirit of Moonclan: Uh, kinda both, I guess!**

**SC 3 TC: Okay, I remember them.**

**Destiny Willowleaf: You may have submitted it on chapter 44, but there is an edit on chapter 13 or 14 that says no OCs are being accepted anymore. Sorry!**

**Petalfall11: You're welcome!**

**Eaglefan2569: Sorry, as I mentioned Fallstar wasn't going to be accepted.**

**Sparrowwing and Shimmerstar: For the couple of troll comments - I'd like to know what I did, that you felt it is okay to say such rude things (if it was actually you or someone else - which I think is more likely - using these names)? Rude ****reviews are not gonna show up, so really, all you're doing is wasting your time.**

**Next poll is up! For the "fangirlish". **

* * *

Bramblestar walked up to Squirrelflight wearing a tuxedo and carrying a ring box. "Hi, Squirrelflight." he mewed.

"Are you proposing to me again? Because Brambly, hon, you've done that already. And we've gotten married." Squirrelflight mewed patiently.

Bramblestar made a face. "Ew, no! Why would I propose to an old bat like yourself? I was going to ask you where Fernlight was." Bramblestar mewed.

"Okay, then..." Squirrelflight growled. "She's right over there." she directed a paw to Fernlight, who was having a discussion with Gorgeousleaf and Moonfeather.

"Thank you, peasant." Bramblestar marched past her. "Fernlight..." he mewed, getting onto one knee. "Will you marry me?"

"No." Fernlight growled.

"Fine. Gorgeousleaf, will you marry me?"

"No." Gorgeousleaf hissed.

"Moonfeather, will you-"

"No."

"Shiningleaf, will you-"

"No."

"Silverstar, will you-"

"No."

"Cloudfeather, will you-"

"No way!"

"Whispersong, will you-"

"Nope!" "Swiftstorm-"

"No way, Jose! I'm married!"

"Peppercloud-"

"No. Just no."

"Sweetcat-"

"Nopey-dopey!"

"Perfectstar-"

"Ew, no!"

Finally, it was down to one she-cat. Angelhalo. "Angelhalo, will you marry me?"

Angelhalo looked at Bramblestar in disgust. "I'd rather lose my beauty than marry you." she snarled. "And coming from me, that's saying something."

Bramblestar frowned. "It is." then he brightened. "Well, I have been preparing for this." Snapping his claws, they all poofed onto a deserted island. "You shall stay here until one of you marry me." Bramblestar mewed. Then he walked away.

"Oh, that's supposed to stop us." Fernlight rolled her eyes. They poofed out of the island and then attacked Bramblestar, all wild-style. They killed him and left.

But unfortunately, he's a leader. He still has lives left.

* * *

Lionblaze strutted up to Goldenwing's Chapstick, which was put in a glass case with a bunch of security. He asked the Chapstick, "Will you go on a date with me?" he asked.

The Chapstick was quiet.

"Oh, the glass must block the noise." Lionblaze mewed. He picked up the bat that he'd stolen from Goldenwing when she had been trying to whack him, and then hit the glass case. It didn't break, but it did set off an alarm that sent Goldenwing running in with her backup baseball bat, along with the Kitty Police.

"Wha... oh, hi, guys!" Lionblaze mewed cheerily. "Do you want to help me break into this case so I can go on a date with Goldenwing's Chapstick?"

"Sure." the Kitty Police shrugged. "It's not like we've got anything better to do."

"You were called here because he's trying to STEAL my Chapstick!" Goldenwing growled.

"Ooh... that's why we got an alarm back at the station." the Kitty Police mewed as though the realization had just hit him.

"Yeah..." Goldenwing face-pawed. "Well, since you probably won't be any help, I guess I'll have to do it myself. As the saying goes, "if you want to beat up your arch-nemesis, you've got to hit him with the bat yourself". THIS- IS- SPARTA!" she screeched, waving the baseball bat in the air and running towards Lionblaze.

"See you later, Chapstick, because, rest assured, I'll be back." Lionblaze whispered towards the glass case, and then he took off in a black Mustang.

Goldenwing leaped into the Kitty Police's truck and then sped off after him.

"Ooh, a car chase." Rootstar mewed. "Let's go, friends!" she called to Epicstar, Cinderxlion00isawesome, Cinderblaze, and Starstar. They jumped into a really small, clown-like car that surprisingly went really fast and had a funny horn.

"WHEE!" screamed Cinderblaze.

"Who are we chasing after?" asked Starstar.

"Well, we're chasing after Goldenwing who's chasing after Lionblaze... so I guess it's Lionblaze!" Rootstar mewed cheerily.

"Okay!" Starstar shrugged.

"STOP, YOU NO-GOOD PICKACHUS!" screeched Rootstar.

"YES, STOP IN THE NAME OF THE CHICKEN!" yowled Epicstar.

"No thanks!" both Lionblaze and Goldenwing called.

But then they caught both of them and they were put in Candy Prison which had chocolate slabs as the walls and candy canes as the cell bars.

"How'd you build this?" Lionblaze asked, entranced.

"We just did, Young Skywalker." Rootstar mewed wisely.

"Okay." Lionblaze mewed.

"Now, don't try to escape, for there is no way!" Epicstar warned them.

"Okay." Lionblaze mewed.

But when they walked away, Lionblaze mewed, "I've tried some of the jail. You can eat your way out!"

"All right, then start chomping!" Goldenwing ordered.

"Well, you need to help if you want to get out." snapped Lionblaze.

"But you're the one who wants to eat."

"Well, I don't want to help you get out. If you want to get out, you need to help." Lionblaze crossed his arms.

"Then we'll never get out." Goldenwing mewed.

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

"FINE!"

"FINE!"

So they spent the rest of their life in Candy Jail bickering to their hearts content.

Just kidding.

After three days, they got so annoyed with each other they both busted out, helping each other do it.


	95. Chapter 95

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Sparrowing and Shimmerstar: Again, do either of you know anything about the troll comments? Both of you reviewed after I asked last time, but didn't say anything about it. Even if you don't know anything about it, I would like you to say something so I can get this cleared up.**

**RicekitxTofukit: Um, if you want your kitties to become warriors, that's KK with me. **

**Kylestar: I'll what?**

**Griffinblitz: I'll see about it, but it may not be until I need a random cat to say a line. But in my clarification, I said I just might accept names, but I can't guarantee anything. Sorry!**

**UnknownProdigy: I respond to reviews that need to be responded to. Like answering your question, or things about OCs. **

**Cinderxlion00: Technically, they licked and then bit. I've tried to bite a candy cane without licking and it hurt. **

**iheartbadboys14: LIONBLAZE CANNOT HAVE ANY CHAPSTICK! YOU SHOULD NO BETTER THAN THAT! XD but seriously... Chapstick is practically forbidden to him.**

**Next poll is up! For the "coolest".**

* * *

"I love my... SPORK!" screamed Epicstar, waving a spork in the air.

"Congrats, bestie!" Rootstar hugged her. "Are you gonna get married?"

"EW NO!" screeched Epicstar, and then tossed the spork into the river. "I like to keep my options open!"

"Cool." Rootstar mewed like a hippie.

Then they both started to sing "Single Ladies". They marched through the camps singing loudly.

"Ooh, single ladies!" Lionblaze mewed. "THEY'RE SINGLE!" he ran over to them. "Hello, laaaaddddieeeezzzz!"

They took one look at him and smacked him. Then they continued marching and singing.

Lionblaze chased after them. "WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU?!" he sobbed. Then he ran by Goldenwing. He then ran back to her. "Hi, do you have your Chapstick with you?"

"Of course, since obviously, I can't trust the Kitty Police to be the living protectors of it." Goldenwing mewed, as if Lionblaze's question was the dumbest thing she'd ever had said to her.

"Oh... kay." Lionblaze mewed. "Do you have a... bat?"

"Not with me, not right now." Goldenwing mewed.

"Great!" Lionblaze then attacked her and snatched the Chapstick.

Suddenly, Goldenwing's eyes turned red. "VIOLATOR-RIGHT-HERE. TARGET-IDENTIFIED. CHAPSTICK-THEIF. LIONBLAZE- HAS- STOLEN- THE- CHAPSTICK." her eyes then shot lazers.

"EEEKK!" shrieked Lionblaze, throwing the Chapstick into the air, and then fled.

Goldenwing was leaning against a tree all gangster-like. "I see you met my friend."

"What is this thing?" Lionblaze panted, running around the tree with the robot Goldenwing continuously shooting the lazers.

"Goldenwing 2000, or the Chapstick Protector." Goldenwing shrugged.

"Well, I suppose that makes sense, because I'm not gonna give up on trying to get your Chapstick." Lionblaze then ran away from the tree with the Chapstick Protector pelting after him.

"Well, this is awkward..." Lavenderbreeze mewed, from where she was sharing a mouse with Jaystorm, and Lionblaze and Goldenwing 2000 chasing in circles around them.

"Look, we've been through this before. All we've got to do is pretend this isn't happening and we're in a perfectly sane Clan." Jaystorm mewed calmly.

Then Goldenwing 2000 lazered their mouse.

"Well, I don't mind my meat well-done." Lavenderbreeze mewed mildly.

"Yes, it tastes okay." shrugged Jaystorm.

So they continued to eat like nothing happened.

Until Lionblaze stepped on their mouse.

"Paw-tasting mice are okay." Jaystorm mewed.

"Yeah... let's just get a new mouse. There's no pretending here." Lavenderbreeze rolled her eyes.

"Yeah..." Jaystorm mewed. "Why do we bother pretending?"

"Who knows..."

* * *

"I HAVE PUDDING!" screamed a random cat.

"Who're you?" asked Lionblaze.

"VIXENCLAW!" yowled the cat. She began tossing spoons and pudding cups into the air.

"PUDDING!" screamed Nemoblizzard. "Wait... do you have forks?"

"You eat your pudding with a _fork_?" Rootstar mewed, mystified. "I'm extremely random and even I don't do that!"

"It's for Liam!" Destinysoul put her paw over her heart.

"Why?"

"HE'S AFRAID OF SPOONS!" screamed Nemoblizzard.

"Are you?" Strikewing stuck out her lip.

"No, but we're just too loyal not to do so." Nemoblizzard growled.

"That's dumb." Hawkfire grumbled.

"That's an obsession." growled Shiningleaf.

"It's called LOYALTY!" Berrynose screamed.

"No, it's an obsession." Shiningleaf hissed.

"Loyalty."

"Obsession."

"Dedication!" Destinysoul offered.

"Obsession."

"Loyalty!"

"Obsession!"

"Dedication!"

"LOYALTY!"

"OBSESSION!"

"DEDICATION!"

"Well, I'm okay with loyalty and dedication, but "obsession" is a definite no-no." Gorgeousleaf snapped.

"Whatever." Strikewing rolled her eyes.

"NOT WHATEVER!" roared Berrynose. He attacked Strikewing. "ONE DIRECTION IS EVERYTHING!"

"DIRECTIONER AND DIRECTIONATOR WAR!" screeched Hawkfire.

And so they fought.

* * *

**Yes, Liam of 1D is afraid of spoons. I learned that from my "dedicated" friends.**


	96. When Pretty Kitties go Golfing

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Cinderxlion00: Well, they REALLY love 1D. **

**xXBreezefeatherxX, Serena222, TheWarriorOfTheRiver, Hollowflight: Yeah, I'm not accepting OCs. Probably never again. Sorry. And Hollowflight, what d'you mean by your blog?**

**Shimmerstar: Okay, thank you. :) Sparrowing?**

**Spottedfur of Windclan: Your problems have come back. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE moderate your reviews. Those are disgusting and it isn't a good thing to have them showing up. You need to do more removing.**

**Foxspeaker: Cool! But the name "Niall" also starts with "Ni". I just didn't know what to call it.**

**Guest: I've got over 2000 reviews now. So no, sorry!**

**Griffinblitz: Griffinkit will be used if a line needs to be said. And I cannot garuntee that that will be ever, no matter how much asking you do. Sorry.**

**Next poll's up. For the "naughtiest kit".**

**CLARIFICATION: Destinysoul is actually called Desiredwishes. I messed up.**

* * *

"Hey, guys, let's go play mini-golf!" Fernlight mewed.

"Kay!" the other pretty kitties agreed.

So they went mini-golfing. When the arrived, they went into the place that gives out the golf balls and putters.

"Hi, can we have some golf balls and putters?" Moonfeather asked.

The cat behind the counter nodded and began to deal out the balls and putters. When he got to Fernlight, she shook her head. "I don't need a golf ball. But I need a very large club." she patted her big, cat-shaped bag that she had dragged into the place with her.

"Oh... okay?" the cat mewed. He went into the back room and brought out the largest club that they had.

"BRAMBLESTAR GOLFING!" screamed Fernlight when they reached the first hole. Using her very large club, she pulled out of her cat-shaped bag, Bramblestar. She rolled him into a ball and began to putt.

He rolled away and into the river.

"Oops, I lost my ball..." Fernlight mewed.

"Well, no one's gonna complain about losing that one." Moonfeather mewed.

"No, definitely not." Fernlight mewed. So Fernlight went to get a new ball and they continued playing.

Just before they left, Bramblestar popped up in front of them and asked,

"Missed me?"

"No way." Fernlight scoffed, and then they pushed past him and he was stamped by hotness.

Literally. When he got up, there were pawprints on his fur.

* * *

"LA...LA...LA...LA!" screamed Bramblestar.

"Shut up, now." snarled Ruffledfur.

"No!" screamed Bramblestar.

"Why not?" Ruffledfur hissed.

"Cuz you're dumb." giggled Bramblestar.

Ruffledfur furrowed his brow. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Beats me." giggled Bramblestar.

"SPORK ATTACK!" yowled Rootstar.

"Why would you have such a thing?" Smartykit mewed. "That is highly illogical, considering-"

"WHY MUST YOU BE SUCH A DOWNER?!" sobbed Rootstar. "ALL MY LIFE, I'VE JUST BEEN TRYING TO BE RANDOM, AND EVERY TIME, YOU BRING ME DOWN, SAYING THAT WHAT I'M DOING IS _ILLOGICAL_, OR WHATEVER THAT IS!"

"You are a disgrace to the name of randomness!" Epicstar hurried to support Rootstar.

"What?" gasped Smartykit. "Are you kidding? A disgrace to randomness is someone sane! That would be Lavenderbreeze and Jaystorm!"

"You're right!" gasped Rootstar. Then she raised a paw into the air. "OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!"

"LET THEM EAT CAKE!" added Epicstar.

"Ooh, is this another French Revolution?" asked Frenchkit.

"OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!"

"LET THEM EAT CAKE!"

They marched over to Lavenderbreeze and Jaystorm, who were again trying to have a sane meal.

"YOU ARE TRAITORS TO SANITY!" screamed Rootstar. "YOU SHALL BE BEHADED!"

"First off, though, would you like some cake?" asked Epicstar, holding out a big birthday cake.

Lavenderbreeze and Jaystorm stared at it, bewildered.

"I'm sorry, they didn't have deathday cakes at the store!" Epicstar pouted.

"OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!" Rootstar leaped on top of Lavenderbreeze. Epicstar jumped on Jaystorm.

But since Rootstar and Epicstar were trained _insanely_ and Lavenderbreeze and Jaystorm were trained _sanely,_ in other words, they were trained properly, like warriors, so they won.

Haha. In Rootstar's and Epicstar's faces. Sometimes saneness wins.

But then Rootstar and Epicstar went into random spasms and nearly drove Lavenderbreeze and Jaystorm to the brink of madness. So they stomped away.

No, saneness will never win.

"Not in my house!" Rootstar stared at the screen and wagged a claw.

"No, no, not in my house!" Epicstar agreed.

Whoop, whoop!

* * *

**96TH CHAPTER COMPLETE! *Does a dance***

**I plan on trying to get the 100th chapter up next Friday. That is when the winners of the contest will be announced.**

**Oh! I was listening to Ke$ha and Will. I. Am's new song called "Crazy People", and all I could think of was this story. XD Has there been anything you saw/heard or anthing like that that reminded you of this?**

**-In other news, I have 99 favorites as an author! And since most of those favorites come from this story, thank you guys so much! No, I really can't believe something I wrote could do such things... (Yes, it's a gushy moment. BRING IT IN, FELLAS!)**


	97. Chapter 97

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Pumpkinfur: Sorry, no OCs are being accepted!**

**Meow: Only people with accounts can favorite/follow.**

**Guest: Thank you! :) **

**Minnowpaw of ImagineClan: Yes, I will.**

**Shadowheartdragon: Thank you :)**

* * *

The Elder Chorus was singing "All Night Longer".

"You have got to be kidding." Redpaw stared at the elders.

Ferncloud stuffed her kits up a tree, of course, except this was a REALLY thick tree, and before she did so, she put earplugs in her kits ears, 'cuz that song is SOOOOOO not kit-friendly.

"Your most inappropriate song yet!" groaned Fireflight.

"Thank you." bowed Purdy.

"Could you sing something less inappropriate?" asked Cutecat. "I don't like doing what Ferncloud does to her kits, but I'm very close to doing so with this person's music."

"Well, none of the artist's songs are very kit-friendly, so... NOPE!" yowled Purdy.

"He doesn't have any appropriate songs?"

"Not really!" grinned Purdy, handing Cutecat an iPod. She plugged the headphones in and then screamed. "Aw, that's not appropriate!"

Bulletkit snatched the iPod away from his mother. "Cool!" he yowled.

Cutecat facepawed and tried to take the iPod from Bulletkit. "Give-that-to-me!" she screeched.

Bulletkit pulled away. "No thank you, Mommy." he mewed innocently.

Cutecat frowned. "Flashparty, a little help?"

"No can do, wifey." Flashparty mewed from where he was reading a magazine.

"I happen to be a supporter of his music, so I'm gonna call this father-son bonding and ignore it."

"Really, Flashparty? Really? They're about two moons old. They are not ready for such songs!"

"Father-son bonding." Flashparty mewed lamely.

"No..." Cutecat mewed impatiently. "Father-son-scar-your-kit-for-life. Help me!"

"Who are you kidding, they're raised by me. They can't be scarred for life. They're raised to listen to these things." Flashparty growled.

Cutecat face-pawed. "Um... who could help me... Whitestreak!" she called. "Can you help me get this away from Bulletkit?"

"Sure, Cutecat." Whitestreak padded over and tugged it out of Bulletkit's paws.

Quickly, Bulletkit stuffed the headphones in Whitestreak's ears.

"WHOA THAT IS INAPRO-PRO!" screamed Whitestreak, and he threw the iPod away like it was burning his ears.

"HAHA!" Bulletkit laughed maniacally.

Cutecat growled at Flashparty.

"Ooh, Mommy and Daddy are having some issues!" Bulletkit had this really weird smile on his face and giggled maniacally.

"Fighting is part of a healthy relationship." Cutecat mewed calmly.

"Right, Flashparty?" she glared warningly at her mate. "Yeah, yeah, sure..." Flashparty mewed absently.

"Again, Mommy and Daddy are having issues." Bulletkit grinned.

* * *

"Hey dudes," whispered Cloudtail. "Let's prank-call!"

"Ooh, yes!" cried Bramblestar. "Who first?" Cloudtail took out the phone book and pointed to a name.

"Oh, that's good!" Thornclaw nodded.

They dialed the number.

"Hello? Is your refrigerator running?" Bramblestar mewed in a disguised voice.

"How cheesy." grumbled the cat, sighing. "Yes."

"WELL YOU BETTER GO CATCH IT!" screamed Bramblestar, losing his disguised voice.

"BRAMBLESTAR, I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" screamed the cat. "I WILL COME OVER TO YOUR HOUSE AND GET YOU!"

"GRASSTAR'S GONNA KILL ME!" shrieked Bramblestar, running around in circles. "GRASSTAR'S GONNA KILL ME!"

Grasstar stomped over to Bramblestar. "I'm going to beat you up!" she hissed.

"No thank you." Bramblestar ran away.

"You sure? I've been practicing some fighting moves, and I'd love to try them!" Grasstar ran after him.

"Again, NO THANK YOU!" yowled Bramblestar. He began to run faster.

"Too bad." Grasstar leaped on top of him.

Grasstar took out these weird candy cane swords, and Bramblestar took out some as well

"FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" chanted the overexcessive dumbheads that always do that when fights occur.

"Actually, no thanks." Bramblestar walked away. "I'm not feelin' it today. See ya." he walked away.

"I will get you someday, I hope you realize that!" Grasstar yowled.

* * *

**The polls are all done! The winners will be announced during the hundredth chapter. **


	98. Chapter 98! Woo!

**Chapter 98! Wow... 2 more chapters until 100!**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Kylestar: The review just said "you'll".**

**Sparrowing: Sorry about what? And do you know anything about the troll comment?**

**Guest: No, I'm not accepting OCs. Sorry.**

**UnknownProdigy: There will be more than just the announcement of the winners.**

**Shimmerstar: Oh, she's a pretty kitty too? I can't keep track anymore...**

**Riversong Fellow: You're welcome! :)**

**Disclaimer- I don't own anything you've seen or heard of before this story.**

* * *

"ANNOUNCEMENT!" yowled Sweetforever. "FOREVERALONEFOREVER AND I ARE GONNA GET MARRIED!"

"WEDDING-NESS!" screamed Shadowheart. "TOO MUCH GUSHY ROMANCE AND STUFF!" She fainted.

They were poofed to a church, as usual.

"Attention! The penguin is in the nest! The penguin is in the nest!" the announcer seemed to be a spy or someone who spoke in code like that.

"WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!" wailed Stupidkit.

"The bride is coming, so please stand." they realized the announcer was Bramblestar. "What's the point of a wedding if you can't speak in code?"

Squirrelflight face-pawed.

"LA Story" played and Sweetforever crashed through the church doors in a VW Beetle. She drove down the aisle, occasionally crashing into pews. Then, at the end of the aisle, she hopped out and the minister came out. Purdy, of course, was the minister. The ceremony, of course, went on for a year because Purdy would not shut his mouth telling a lot of stories.

Finally, they were married.

Ferncloud covered her kits eyes.

Hawkfire crossed her paws and whispered to Whitestreak, who was sitting next to her, "I'd find this a lot cuter if Foreveraloneforever wasn't so ugly."

Whitestreak snorted. A couple of cats looked at him, and he quickly covered his mouth.

"What about Foreveraloneforever? His name doesn't fit him anymore- so can he even use it?" asked Flamingfeather, flicking her tail.

Bramblestar made a REALLY weird face, his eyes wide and lips smushed together or something like that. "Your tail is on fire again," he whispered.

Flamingfeather smacked him. "You know it always looks like that."

"Or do I?" Bramblestar backed away into the shadows.

"Eh, because if Sweetforever dies first, he'll never get another she-cat." Hawkfire mewed. "So no, we needn't change his name."

"You can say that again." Whitestreak rolled his eyes.

"WHAT that she-cat saw in him, we may never know."

Roseheart growled. "Would you stop hanging out with Hawkfire? It seems you're trying to flirt with her or something!"

"MOMMY AND DADDY ARE HAVING ISSUES!" Puzzlepaw screamed.

"Oh, give me a break." sighed Whitestreak. "Roseheart, of course I'm going to hang out with her- she's my friend and I'm basically her deputy." Roseheart sighed. "You too are too close for my own liking."

"Issues." whispered Puzzlepaw, eyes wide. "That's what this is."

And then Whitestreak and Roseheart started kissing.

"PDA!" screamed Cinderblaze, running around in circles. "PDA!"

Ferncloud looked around frantically. "WHERE ARE THE TREES?!" she wailed.

Goldenwing mewed, "Goldenwing 2000 destroyed them."

"ARGH!" Ferncloud yowled. "WHY?!"

"'Cuz Lionblaze wasn't there." she mewed.

Ferncloud wailed. Then she stuffed her kits in Freakishlyoldface's cloud of denture cream **(Yes, that is a thing, don't judge me!)**.

"Not as good, but it'll work until the trees come back." she shrugged.

Immaturekit stuck his head out. "I really don't think so, Mommy."

Ferncloud screamed and then yowled at Goldenwing, "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" she began to chase after her.

"Blame Goldenwing 2000!" Goldenwing screamed.

Lionblaze stuck out his lip as she ran past him. "Now you know how I feel."

"But Ferncloud ain't chasin' me with a baseball bat." Goldenwing ran around him. "So not exactly."

"Don't be so sure about that." Lionblaze nodded towards Ferncloud. She had a giant golf club.

"Still not the same. Plus, I'm a lot more capable of getting out of this than you." Goldenwing grinned and hopped into the cloud of denture cream and sailed away.

"HEY, YOU WHIPPERSNAPPER! I NEED THAT!" yowled Freakishlyoldface, and began to hobble after her.

"I'll give it back to you later, Freaky! I need it right now!" called Goldenwing, and she sped off into the sky, and then there was a flash like a star, like the thing you see in movies.

"Well, this is awkward..." Lionblaze mewed.


	99. Chapter 99! LALALALA!

**LALALALA... 99TH CHAPTER! EEE!**

**...What's all this talk about me ending this story? I signed a virtual promise to Skystep of StormClan that I would not end this. But the 100th chapter is a HUGE deal. It's a pretty big milestone- not many stories get up to it.**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Minnowpaw of ImagineClan: As much as I hate to say this, you might want to like your crush more. You can't marry or date the story. I'm already doing so! XD **

* * *

"SHAKE YOUR BUTT IN THE AIR LIKE YOU JUST DON'T CARE!" screamed Bramblestar, shaking his butt.

The cats began to shake their butts in the air like they just didn't care.

Then Hawkfire poofed in. "START DECORATING THIS PLACE!" she screamed. "WE SHALL HAVE A PARTY!"

"Parties are cool." nodded Toocool.

Hawkfire poofed the party decorations.

"I CALL SETTING UP THESE CONFETTI CANNONS!" screamed Cinderblaze.

"BUT I WANT TO DO THEM!" screamed Starstar. She shoved Cinderblaze out of the way and ran over to the cannons. There were bags of confetti beside them.

Starstar reached for a cannon and Cinderblaze bowled her over. "NO, NO, NO, NOT IN MY HOUSE!" she screamed.

"WELL, THIS AIN'T YO HOUSE, SISTAH!" yowled Starstar.

"What if it was?" Cinderblaze mewed.

"Well, it isn't." Starstar growled. "SO GIVE ME THAT CANNON AND THAT BAG OF CONFETTI!"

And so then they began to pull on the bag of confetti and it exploded.

"WHEE!" screamed Cinderblaze and began to dance in the confetti. "IT'S RAININ' CONFETTI!"

Starstar face-pawed. "Hawkfire, we're going to need more confetti."

"Here ya go." Hawkfire clapped her paws and more confetti rained down on them.

Starstar face-pawed again. "IN A BAG, HAWKFIRE!"

"Kay." Hawkfire clapped her paws again and then a giant bag of confetti fell on Starstar.

Starstar groaned and then pushed the bag off of her. "At least it was confetti." she grumbled.

Hawkfire bowed and then started singing "L.A. Story" really loudly.

"What is with you and that song?" Jayfeather growled.

"I love it. I love all of his songs!" Hawkfire sighed dreamily

"OOH, HAWKFIRE HAS A CRUSH!" screamed Dramatickit.

"NO, I JUST LIKE HIS MUSIC! AND AT LEAST, IF I DID, HE ISN'T ONE DIRECTION!" Hawkfire wrinkled her nose.

"WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST THEM?!" screamed Desiredwishes, falling randomly from the sky and onto Hawkfire.

"I just don't like them." Hawkfire growled.

"Oh boy, this is going to happen again?" sighed Hippiekit. "Why can't we just live in peace?"

"Cuz it is not possible." Hawkfire snapped.

"DIRECTIONER AND DIRECTIONATOR WAR!" screamed Strikewing, and crashed onto Desiredwishes.

"I'M COMING, FRIEND!" yowled Nemoblizzard, crashing onto the ground. She ran over and flung Strikewing off and then Strikewing jumped on her. She slid out from under her and leaped on her. Then Strikewing did the same, and Nemoblizzard again, Strikewing, Nemoblizzard... it went on for a while.

"STOP IN THE NAME OF PARTY ROCK!" howled Hawkfire. "I KNOW WE ALL LOVE TO HATE ON EACH OTHER, BUT WE'VE GOT A PARTY TO PUT TOGETHER!"

"Kay." Rootstar mewed.

And then there was more confetti explosions.

"This is quite the randomness empire." Hawkfire mewed fondly.

"You know that the party will never happen if they don't work?" Whitestreak face-pawed.

"What do you know? With a clap of my paws I can get it all done." Hawkfire made a face. "GET WITH THE PROGRAM, WHITESTREAK!"

"If you can do that, why are you making them put it together?" "Because it's fun to boss them around." Hawkfire mewed. She clapped her paws and everything was put into place.

"CONGA LINE!" screamed Bramblestar. He began to do the conga. A lot of kitties joined him.

"Save it for the party!" ordered Hawkfire.

"Can the party be now?" asked Bramblestar.

"No. Later." Hawkfire mewed.

Bramblestar was quiet for a second. "Now?"

"No."

Pause.

"Now?"

"No."

Pause.

"Now?"

"No!"

Pause.

"Now?"

"NO!" Hawkfire growled. "WHEN I SAY WHEN! AND NOT A MOMENT EARLIER!"

"Party pooper." Bramblestar growled, crossing his paws. "You are a control freak."

"And you are annoying." Hawkfire scoffed.

"OOH... BURN!" yowled Dramatickit.

Hawkfire tossed her fur and strutted away.

Bramblestar stared after her. "Okay..."

A day later, Hawkfire walked back in. "Okay, now." she mewed.

A confettit cannon went off.

** BOOM.**


	100. Chapter 100! YAY!

**Well, having the 100th chapter up on last Friday really didn't work... I haven't had any time the past few days... whatever. You've had enough excuses from me.**

**100 chapters... wow... I really can't believe I've gone so far! I know this is fanfiction but I'm so happy! So literally, in under a year, in about a 7/12 of a year, this has become the first story on the Warriors Fandom to get over 1000 and 2000 reviews, and a lot of other things but I don't want to brag...**** But it couldn't have been done without you guys, meaning, of course, I'm going to have to do the big amount of thanking...**

**I put most of the thank-yous on my profile, or you'd just be reading me gushing on and on about how great all of you are. So to save time, it's there. Feel free to check it out. This is the one mushy thing I kept on here:**

**Thank you all for participating in the success that was made out of something I had intended to just be a place to spew all these dumb ideas and get randomness out of my system, for making this a very successful "Randomness Empire". Because of you, I was able to create something out of nothing. **

**Without further ado, the 100th chapter :)**

* * *

"100! 100! 100!" screamed Hawkfire.

"PARTY! PARTY! PARTY!" yowled Bramblestar.

Lavenderbreeze face-pawed.

"Wait, before the party starts, we need to announce the winners for the contest!" Hawkfire announced. Clapping her paws, they were poofed to the auditorium.

Desiredwishes was on the stage. She was going to be the announcer for the winners. "Hello!" she chirped. "Who's ready to get started?" she mewed.

The crowd cheered and whooped.

"All right, the prize for the "stupidest"! In last place, we have E*Tradekit and Hungryforeverything, with zero votes! Then Fartkit, then Dumbface, then Lionblaze, and then Stupidkit! A very close race! But Stupidkit wins!" Desiredwishes grabbed a golden pineapple (oh gosh, I'm not sure if there's enough fruit for this...) and handed it to Stupidkit, who had stumbled onto the stage.

"Sweet!" Stupidkit took a bite out of it and fell off the stage.

"Well, that one's done..." Desiredwishes looked down at Stupidkit. "Onto the next category! The "randomest! In last place, Furstar, Heartshadow, Cinderblaze, and Lionblaze! Then Chocolate Pie That Tastes so Darn Good, next, Cinderxlion00isawesome, then Starstar, leaving Rootstar to be the winner! Congratulations, Rootstar!"

"Banana ice cream for all!" Rootstar skipped onto the stage and received her prize- a golden apple.

"Next is "brattiest"! In last place, Whinykit! Then Spoiledkit! Angelhalo is the winner!" Desiredwishes laughed. "I WON! HAHA!" Angelhalo stuck her tongue out at her opponents and strutted onto stage and received her prize. It was a golden pear.

"NO FAIR!" screamed Whinykit.

"RECOUNT!" Spoiledkit growled. "I DEMAND A RECOUNT!"

They were "escorted" from the auditorium by security.

"Next is the "best singer/singing group"! In last place, Songheart! Then the Directioners..." Desiredwishes sighed. "Then Harmonykit! Oh, this was close... but the Elder Chorus comes in second, leaving the Directionators to be the winners!"

"WHOO!" screamed the Directionators, and leaped up onto the stage to receive their prize- a basket full of golden fruit.

"Now for the epicest! In last place, Whitestreak, Lightningstrike, and Darkfur! Next is the Munchkin Warriors! Then Shadowheart, next is Flashparty, then Goldenwing, and Hawkfire is the winner!"

"Cool!" Hawkfire purred. She leaped up onto the stage and hugged Desiredwishes. She got her prize, a golden tomato (it is a fruit). She smiled, "Thank you!"

"Now, prettiest she-cat! In last place, Whispersong, Swiftstorm, Angelhalo, and Sweetcat! Next, Peppercloud and Perfectstar! Then Fernlight, then Moonfeather, and Gorgeousleaf won!"

"Whee!" Gorgeousleaf skipped onto the stage and got her prize, a golden coconut. She skipped off the stage.

"Now for "hottest tom"! In last place, Solar! Then Lightningstrike, then Trollface, then Peetahotness, and Whitestreak wins!"

Whitestreak smiled and took his prize, a container of golden blueberries.

"Now for "ugliest"! In last place, Fattyface! Then Foreveraloneforever! Freakishlyoldface wins!"

Freakishlyoldface smiled (he'd forgotten his dentures, uh-oh), and received his prize, a golden orange.

"Now for "cutest kit"! In last place, Bigkit! Then Sleetkit, leaving Cutekit the winner!" Cutekit cheered cutely and then cutely climbed the stage and cutely received her prize, a golden banana.

"Next is "sanest"! Jaystorm and Lavenderbreeze were the only two in here! It was very close, but Lavenderbreeze won! Congratulations!"

Lavenderbreeze sighed. "The insane kitties." she climbed the stage and took her prize, a golden prune. It's a prune because those are gross and being sane here is gross.

"Now for "weirdest"! In last place, Dumbface, then Fattyface! Then Hungryforeverything, then Purdy, then Weirdkit, and Freakishlyoldface! His second win!"

Freakishlyoldface smiled his toothless smile and took his next prize, a golden lime.

"Now for "hopeless flirter"! Foreveraloneforever and Lionblaze are after... Bramblestar! He's the most hopeless flirter of the most hopeless flirters!"

Bramblestar walked up onto the stage. He smiled flirty-like. "This goes out to the prettiest she-cat I know... Fernlight!" he winked.

Desiredwishes gave him his prize and he walked off. "Now for funniest! In last place, Furstar and PSYCH! Then Epicstar! Then Cinderxlion00isawesome, then Cinderblaze, then Rootstar, then Starstar! Congratulations, Starstar!"

Starstar walked up and received her prize, a golden donut. "BOW TO THE DONUT QUEEN!" she screamed.

"ALL HAIL STARSTAR!" the cats bowed immediately.

"Now for "evillest"! In last place, Shimmerstar and Icepool! Then Tei-Tei the Yandre, then Flashparty, then Grasstar, leaving Shadowheart- the she-cat- to be the winner!"

Shadowheart strutted up onto the stage and took her prize, a golden bag of peas (I've taken to using vegetables because I can't think of any more fruit! Don't judge me!). "What are these?"

"Peas." Desiredwishes mewed innocently.

"I'm evil. I'm a carnivore. I want to remember this with MEAT!" roared Shadowheart.

"Sorry, sorry..." Desiredwishes dove behind the stage and came out again with a golden steak.

"Thank you." Shadowheart marched off the stage, waving her golden steak in the air.

"Well, then... now for the "prankiest"! Now, this one was very, very, very close... and it would have been a tie if it weren't for one more voter! In second place is Orphankit, and the winner is Chucklez-Lives-On!"

"BOO-YA!" Chucklez-Lives-On yelled and jumped up onto the stage.

"Aren't you modest!" Desiredwishes snorted. "Here's your prize, a golden candy bar!"

"Num nums!" Chucklez walked off the stage.

"Next is most fangirlish! Oh, I'm in this category! Um, well, Poppyfrost and myself came in last place, Dinokit and Gorgeousleaf next, Angelhalo next, then Nemoblizzard, leaving Berrynose to be the winner!" The fangirls all applauded politely as Berrynose gave a squeal and bounced up onto the stage to take his prize- a golden peach.

"I SHOULD'VE WON!" screamed Angelhalo, jumping up and down.

Security took her away.

"The coolest, now! Lightningstrike and Toocool tied, leaving Whitestreak for his second win in this contest!" Whitestreak came up and took his prize, a golden pear.

"And lastly... naughtiest kit! Bulletkit came in last, then Innocentkit, then Ninjakit... Orphankit wins!" Orphankit bounded up onto the stage and took her prize, a golden bunch of grapes.

"Now for the party!" Hawkfire yowled.

"BOO-YA!" screamed Bramblestar, and they poofed to the party.

"BOOGIE OOGIE OOGIE!" screamed Flamingfeather, shaking her tail.

"FIRE!" screamed Bramblestar.

Flamingfeather rolled her eyes. "Get over it, buddy!"

Lightningstrike suddenly announced, "I no longer like Moonfeather!"

"A SEXY TOM ALL UP FOR GRABS!" screamed the she-cats, and basically stampeded over to him and started to fangirl or something.

"Marry me, Lightningstrike!"

"Can I have your autograph?"

"Can I have a clump of your fur?"

"Can I have your face?"

Hey. There are wackos everywhere.

"WHEE!" screamed Rootstar, plunging into a ball pit.

Whitestreak scratched his head. "When did we get a ball pit?"

"I thought the kits would like it." Ferncloud mewed fondly as about a billion kits plunged into the ball pit after Rootstar.

"Um... okay..." Whitestreak inched away.

So they partied, and got crazy on candy and soda.

"NUM NUMS!" screeched Bramblestar, running around in circles.

"WHEE!" then he sashayed up to Fernlight.

"Hel-"

"No." Fernlight snapped at him.

"Okay." Bramblestar sashayed away.

Silverstreak walked in. "HELLO!" she screamed randomly.

"HELLO!" the others screamed and then they began to party even more crazier.

If that's even possible.

* * *

**And that is the 100th chapter.**

**-I told you, Mossfang, I'd consider it. I hadn't forgotten, because I was thinking hard about that. I was very close to having Hawkfire do it, because this is pretty special.**

**For the contest winners's creators, and that includes Pandamoniam, FoxFaceFan1, Fernlight, Goldenwing Eats a Flower, llioning, LeafAkemi, Starstar412, and Cloudystorm123.**

**The prizes are the chapter, and it can be:**

**-A day of randomness in your winning cat's POV**

**-The cat's history (if this is so, then give me details about the cat's history)**

**-A day where your cat is responsible for the Clans (as in, they replace Hawkfire for a day)**

**-Other, if you can think of something else**

**Goldenwing Eats a Flower and Fernlight, Freakishlyoldface and Whitestreak won twice, so it's up to you if you want one or two chapters.**

**Thankfully, all of you who had winning cats have accounts, so to get your cat(s) chapters, you have to go onto my forum and post of the thread I created for this. I don't PM, so you have to do it there. I hope you understand.**

**And one more thing: **

**Guestidy Guest: Obviously, you do not like this story or else you wouldn't have said that. And don't bother reading or commenting my story anymore.**


	101. Chapter 101!

**Chapter 101! Whoop, whoop! *celebrates* This is a normal chapter- the next one will be a "winner's chapter". I am also considering doing a normal chapter in between each. There are a lot more winners this time, and I'm not sure if people who did not get their cat in will enjoy having it rubbed in their faces so many times in a row.**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Cloudystorm123: On the forum, please. I can't accept it anyway else.**

**Grasstar of Windclan: Such as what?**

**Griffinblitz: You submitted her after the deadline. I said that I MIGHT use them. unfortunately, she may never get in. I know you want Griffinkit in, but asking more won't help (and might make it that she won't get in at all).**

**Kylestar of AwesomeClan: Why is it annoying? It's not like you have to read the reviews. XD**

**RandomKitty: Happy birthday :)**

**RandomKitty, Raptor, Amberstar of Randomclan, Sorreltail Is Awesome: Sorry! I'm not accepting OCs! (And nothing that you say or do will make me change that... I'm already swamped with OCs and I don't have room for any more.)**

**lloining, LeafAkemi, Starstar412, FoxFaceFan1... do you have any ideas for your cats' chapters? **

**One more thing, I created a SYOT on the Hunger Games fandom, and I want to get started on the real chapters. If you've read the Hunger Games, would you check it out? Please?**

* * *

"STANLEY CUP FINALS!" yowled Hockeykit.

"BRUINS FOR DA CUP!" screamed ThunderClan, WindClan, and RichClan.

"BLACKHAWKS FOR DA CUP!" screamed ShadowClan, RiverClan, and HotClan.

"Why the Blackhawks?" Bramblestar made a sassy face. "Blackstar, that's a new low for you."

"Why the Bruins?" Blackstar mewed mockingly, making his impression of Bramblestar's sassy face. "Bramblestar, that's a new low for you."

"The Bruins won in 2011. They should win again! For the second time in three years, they could take home the Cup!"

"The Blackhawks haven't won since 2010! They should win again! For the second time in four years, they could take home the Cup!" Blackstar was basically copying Bramblestar.

"Can't you think of something else to say besides my arguments?" Bramblestar puffed.

Blackstar blinked innocently. "No." Bramblestar face-pawed. "Well, I think the Bruins'll beat 'em. The Bruins mopped the floor with the Penguins!"

"Well, the Blackhawks only had five games with Kings!" growled Blackstar.

"And the Bruins had only four games with the Penguins! And they won all four of them! Can you say the same about the Blackhawks? And to help me along in this argument, the Penguins were the favorite to win the Stanley Cup!"

"Well, um, the team with the best goalie is usually the one to win the Cup! In the regular season, the Blackhawk's goalie was better!"

"But in the playoffs, the Bruin's goalie was better!"

"Chicago, a bigger city than Boston, is backing up the Blackhawks!"

"Well, in Vegas, most bets are on the Bruins 'cuz of how they played against the Penguins!"

"Consider their first playoff games against the Leafs! They won in the final game in the last five minutes! How desperate can you get?" Blackstar scoffed.

"At least they won!" Bramblestar stuck out his tongue.

"Shut up and have some pie!" Cinderxlion00isawesome mewed cheerily, walking around and waving a blueberry pie under their noses.

"HOW COULD YOU THINK OF PIE AT A TIME LIKE THIS! YOU SHOULD THINK OF HOCKEY! AND BEER! OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT!" Blackstar yowled.

"Beer is bad for your health." Cinderxlion00isawesome mewed seriously. "Have some pie." she stuck it under Blackstar's nose again.

"Yeah, you have a point..." Blackstar shrugged. Then he took the pie and stuffed his face.

Cinderxlion00isawesome frowned. "What did you do that for?"

"You stuck it under my nose and said, 'have some pie'. What was I supposed to do?"

"Get your own." she growled. "Well, too little too late." Blackstar grumbled. "No, you can still pay me for the coast of that pie! And that was 12,345,678,910 dollars."

"Where did you get the pie? RichClan?" Blackstar asked. "That's a ridiculous amount for a simple blueberry pie!"

"Yes, I got it from RichClan. And seriously, a pie is worth ANY amount of money!" Cinderxlion00isawesome. "Pie. Is. EVERYTHING." she got an insane look in her eyes.

"Okay, okay... pie is everything..." Blackstar backed away. She grinned.

"Good."

* * *

**The next day...**

"The BLACKHAWKS WON!" screeched Blackstar in triumph.

"NO... THE BLACKHAWKS WON!" sobbed Bramblestar.

"Pie?" Cinderxlion00isawesome was dressed like a flight attendant, waving pie under their faces.

Bramblestar whimpered. "I MUST DROWN MY SORROWS IN PIE!" he snatched up the pie and smushed his face in it.

"That'll be 1000000000000000000000000000001 dollars." Cinderxlion00isawesome mewed.

Bramblestar burst into tears and gave her the money.

"A pain on the heart and the wallet!" Squirrelflight snorted.

"YOU AREN'T HELPING MY PAIN!" Bramblestar cried.

"Haha." Blackstar mewed smugly. Then he walked away.

* * *

**I was watching the first of the Stanley Cup finals while working on this. Sorry if you're not very into hockey or you are from a different country and don't even know who or what I'm talking about. But I get inspired by the strangest things- and here we go. And I would've posted this earlier, but I got busy. Again. The same, lame excuse. HOORAH! *Waves fist in the air like a crazy person (which I guess I am XD)***


	102. Chapter 102- Whitestreak's first chapter

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Griffinblitz: For people who had cats win in the contest, their cats get a special chapter focused in on them.**

**CandyBunnies: Hey, cool! I knew it was invented in Canada but I didn't know the other part!**

**xXxTimestarxXx: The Blackhawks JUST won. Last night. I really didn't know what you were talking about when you said that they'd already won when you'd wrote your review. **

**Guest: No, Jayleaf1 most certainly did not make me mad! Guestidy Guest was a reviewer who used *ahem* _unkind _words directed towards me in a review. The reason you did not see it is because I deleted it before it ever showed up. **

**BTW, I wanted the Bruins to win SO BADLY! I have strong opinions when it comes to sports.**

** PS. Look up "Toronto Sun" on Google, if you've had any opinion on the Stanley Cup, then take a look at the cover of the June 25th cover of the newspaper. If you're a Blackhawks fan, you will laugh. If you're a Bruins fan such as myself, you will want to go to Toronto and slap the staff of the "Toronto Sun".**

**This is Whitestreak's first winner chapter, dedicated to Fernlight, his creator. He's VERY OOC in this chapter, although I'm not sure if I have been accurately potraying his personality at all, but he's somewhat more cuckoo than I have been portraying him- and I just felt a little crazier than usual... so... yeah!**

* * *

One day, Fernlight decided to take a walk. It was a beautiful day. The frogs were singing and the birds were croaking. Life couldn't be more perfect.

Could be when That Cat came along. "Hello, Fernlight, daughter of Scarletleaf and Hailstorm, sister of Whitestreak and twin to Moonfeather, and cousin to Wolfclaw and Wolftalon."

"Hello, weirdo." Fernlight tried to move past him, but he blocked her. "Ahem... good-bye, weirdo."

"Aw, thank you, sweetheart." That Cat wiggled his eyebrows. "But I must insist that you don't say good-bye yet. Or forever. Because I'm catnapping you."

"You're going to put me into a short, light, nap?" Fernlight mewed uncomfortably.

"Oh, my lovely, I think you know what I'm talking about." That Cat mewed.

Fernlight slapped him and walked in the other direction.

Then ninjas came and carried her away.

"Yes, I knew." Fernlight rolled her eyes. "But I'm perfectly capable of handling you, you know."

"Presumably." That Cat shrugged. "Well, ninjas, take her away! You know where to go."

* * *

"Has anyone seen Fernlight?" Gorgeousleaf asked.

"No..." Bramblestar shook his head. "And I was planning on asking her out today!"

"You do that every day, hubby. And every day, she rejects you." Squirrelflight mewed. "Plus, you're my mate. You need to stop asking that she-cat out!"

"But I like Fernlight!" he whined.

"Cry a river, build a bridge, and GET OVER IT!" yowled Squirrelflight, and began whacking him with a pillow which she magically pulled out from behind her.

"Blah." Bramblestar crossed his paws and pouted. They searched everywhere but could not find Fernlight.

"I SHALL GO ON A QUEST TO SAVE MY SISTER!" Whitestreak raised a claw in the air. "EVEN THOUGH I HAVE A BIG SIBLING RIVALRY WITH HER!"

"I'll come!" offered Moonfeather.

"And me!" Scarletleaf offered.

"NO!" Whitestreak growled. "THIS IS A TOM'S JOB! WOLFTALON, WOLFCLAW, AND HAILSTORM SHALL COME WITH ME!"

Moonfeather rolled her eyes. "I'm more courageous than you."

"No, you- EEK! A BEETLE! WHAA! BEETLES ARE SCARY!" Whitestreak screamed, and leaped behind Scarletleaf.

"Okay, Mr. Courageous."

"I'm just afraid of beetles. I have a tragic past involving beetles."

"I grew up with you- I was around you for almost all of my life. You most certainly do not have a tragic past involving beetles."

"But what about the times you weren't around?" Whitestreak stuck out his lip.

"I know of everything you did. You always did have detailed stories when you were asked "how was your day"." Moonfeather snorted.

Whitestreak puckered his lips and his eyes widened. Then he began to belt out "All Night Longer" really loudly.

"What does this have to do with anything?" Moonfeather crossed her paws as Ferncloud stuffed her kits up a tree. "And why this song, of all the songs you could've belted out?"

Whitestreak blinked innocently at her. "Because I felt like singing something inappropriate."

"Very mature."

"Thanks."

"WE'RE WASTING TIME! FERNLIGHT IS MISSING! GO SAVE HER!" screamed Gorgeousleaf, slapping Whitestreak's face.

Scarletleaf nodded. "There's really no need to waste so much time over something so irrelevant to the current predicament we have on our paws."

"Fine. READY YOURSELVES MEN!" Then Whitestreak turned into Iron Man, Wolftalon turned into Batman, Wolfclaw turned into Superman, and Hailstorm into Captain America. And then they ran out of the camp.

"Five mice that they don't even return with a cat. Or the wrong cat."

"Deal!"

* * *

So, out of camp, they had found the freshest scent of Fernlight they could find. It was mixed with the scent of That Cat and ninja kitties.

"You know, we were really stupid. We should've figured." Wolftalon mewed.

"We don't tell them we didn't have a clue that it was him." Whitestreak bit his lip.

"Agreed." the others nodded.

So they sniffed around and began to follow the scent trail into a forest. That was made of candy.

"LET US EAT OUR WAY OUT OF THE FOREST!" Whitestreak raised a claw in the air.

"Or we could simply walk through it." Hailstorm suggested.

Whitestreak pouted. "That takes all the fun out of it!"

"Are we here to rescue Fernlight or eat sweets?" Hailstorm growled.

"Both." Whitestreak grinned. "We're saving Fernlight first." Hailstorm mewed.

Whitestreak crossed his paws and pouted. "That's stupid."

"You're not a kit anymore, so quit acting like one. Let's go."

Walking through the forest, having to stop several times because Whitestreak, who seemed to have turned into a sweet-deprived toddler, kept trying to eat this or that, they found the cave.

"Okay, toms, I'm sure That Cat has armed the entrance of the cave, so be cautious!" Whitestreak warned. Then he ninja-rolled into the cave.

Nothing happened and the others simply stepped in.

"I wish he'd armed it- it would've been more fun." Whitestreak rolled his eyes. Hailstorm face-pawed.

"Hey, look!" whispered Wolftalon. "It's Fernlight!"

Fernlight was in a princess dress, and That Cat was in a prince costume. He was also flirting with her.

"What is he doing?" asked Wolfclaw, bewildered.

"Who knows why That Cat does anything?" Hailstorm grumbled.

Then Whitestreak charged at That Cat. "PAWS OFF MAH SISTAH!"

That Cat fell over as Whitestreak barreled into him. The others hurried to grab Fernlight and they ran out of the cave.

Whitestreak leaped off of That Cat and then they ran home, eating candy in celebration.

* * *

"WE FOUND HER! WE SAVED HER!" Whitestreak roared triumphantly, bursting into camp.

"Who'd you find and who'd you save?" Fernlight stepped out from the crowd of cats.

Whitestreak's eyes popped out of his head and his jaw dropped. "Buh... bwa... you... wha...?"

"Oh, so apparently That Cat found the Fernlight robot." Fernlight rolled her eyes. "I went on a walk, but I knew that That Cat was planning to catnap me, so I got a Fernlight robot so I wouldn't be catnapped."

"Whoa..." Whitestreak still had the same face.

"HEY!" screamed the Fernlight robot. "I AM THE REAL FERNLIGHT! The Fernlight robot got way too smart and decided that instead of her replacing me, I'd replace her!"

The Fernlight robot growled. "Drat! My own plan was foiled by my real-life lookalike!" she ran away.

The real Fernlight rolled her eyes.

"Yay for Whitestreak!" the cats cheered.

"You owe me five mice!"

"Dang it..."


	103. Why Prank-Calling is Bad for You

**This is a normal chapter- the next one will be a winner's chapter. Lloining, LeafAKemi, any ideas? (Are you guys even still reading this? I haven't heard from LeafAKemi in a while...)**

**Reply to Reviews: **

**Amberstar of Randomclan and piZza PiE: No, I am not accepting OCs. Sorry!  
**

**Bookworm45669: I'M SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN TO TAKE YOUR MICE! *sobs* OH WILL YOU EVER FORGIVE ME?!**

**Guest: Oh, you know Jayleaf1? Well, can you tell him/her (I never know if it's via internet) that I'm not mad and I can respect that they don't want to read it anymore, and that this story is just me being crazy and it can get out of control and it isn't exactly going to work for everybody- and that the way they said it was kind- better than some people would've put it. So thank him/her for me, actually.**

**ifsmith: Yes, That Cat catnapped her and the robot hadn't taken her place.**

**EchoShade: I keep forgetting that... sorry...**

**DidSomeoneSayDipperPines: Of course! As I have told others, I am not the "Queen of Parodies" and you shouldn't be asking for permission to do it- I'm not the first to do so. You just can't use any of my ideas at all. **

* * *

"Hey, Moonfeather!" laughed Squirrelflight. "What are we gonna do tonight?"

They were at an all-she-cats sleepover. And all the she-cats in ThunderClan, ShadowClan, RiverClan, WindClan, HotClan, and RichClan had come. No toms. All she-cats.

"Let's prank-call boys!" grinned Sweetcat.

"Ha, we should!" Moonfeather grinned. She tossed Squirrelflight her iPhone. "Feel free to use my contacts. I've got so many toms' numbers, it's not even funny."

Squirrelflight scrolled through the contacts. "Indeed... hm, let's do Thornclaw!"

"Remember to add in the other digits so it shows up as a blocked number," added Brightheart.

"Right." Squirrelflight punched in the digits and it began to ring. She turned the speaker and set it in the middle of the large circle of she-cats.

After several rings, Thornclaw picked up. "Hello?"

"Hello?" Squirrelflight began in a ridiculous accent that sounded like a cross between British and Italian. "This is Sugar Bon-Bons. I have had your kits and you haven't even come to visit me or help out ONCE! How irresponsible can you be?"

"Who is Sugar Bon-Bons?" Thornclaw asked confusedly.

"I am Sugar Bon-Bons, your girlfriend!" shouted Fernlight into the phone.

The she-cats burst out laughing.

"Apparently, Sugar Bon-Bons is the name of two twin she-cats who both had kits with Thornclaw." whispered Sorreltail.

"I don't have a girlfriend named Sugar Bon-Bons." Thornclaw mewed.

"Of course you do!" mewed Squirrelflight, continuing the ridiculous accent. "But you recently hit your head and have no recollection of who I am! But now that you remember, you must help take care of your kits!"

"Okay." Thornclaw sighed into the phone. Then he hung up.

"LET'S TRY HIM AGAIN!" screamed Perfectstar, laughing.

"Yeah, like he'd be as stupid as to pick it up more than once."

"You never know." Moonfeather mewed mischievously, so they dialed him again.

After one, two, three, four rings, he picked up. "Hello?"

"It's-a Sugar Bon-Bons! I'va had your kits! Come and visit me, please!" Squirrelflight yelled into the phone with the accent.

"What?" Thornclaw was bewildered.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE HE ANSWERED AGAIN!" Moonfeather wiped a tear from her eye. "What a moron."

"It's-a me, Sugar-Bon-Bons!" grinned Squirrelflight. Then she dissolved into a fit of laughter.

Thornclaw hung up.

"Again, again!" Angelhalo laughed.

"Okay, but he really can't be as stupid as to pick up a third time." Blossomfall narrowed her eyes.

Squirrelflight was already dialing.

Thornclaw picked up on the third ring. "Yes?"

Instead of continuing the nonsense, they all burst into laughter and simply laughed into the phone.

"Good-bye." Thornclaw hung up.

"Let's try again." Angelhalo mewed.

"Kay." Moonfeather dialed.

It didn't go through. Thornclaw had blocked them.

"Well, that was fun while it lasted. Who now?" Perfectstar purred.

Squirrelflight considered this for a moment. "Bramblestar."

"Kay." Perfectstar whipped out her phone and began to dial, and placed it in the middle of the circle.

Bramblestar picked up on the second ring. "H'lo?"

"This is Fernlight!" Squirrelflight mewed, in her best impression of Fernlight.

"I'm going to go out with you!" "NO YOU WON'T CUZ YOU'RE NOT FERNLIGHT!" Bramblestar growled. "YOU DO NOT SPEAK LIKE FERNLIGHT!" he hung up.

"Let's try him again. He's stupider than Thornclaw, so he'll probably pick up." Squirrelflight grinned.

They tried him again. Blocked number.

"_Thornclaw's_ the stupid one here?" Blossomfall gasped. "Well then..."

"Let's try Blackstar! I've got a Chinese food prank I want to do!" Tawnypelt mewed, and dialed Blackstar's number.

"Hello?" Blackstar picked up.

"This is the Chinese food restaurant! We did not receive your order, so could you say it to us again?" Tawnypelt mewed.

"I didn't order Chinese food..." Blackstar mumbled.

"But we have an order coming from your number! Who did?" Tawnypelt asked.

"Dunno."

"Well, since there is an order from this number, you must order something. OR I SHALL SEND THE THAI NINJA PANDA AFTER YOU!" Tawnypelt screamed into the phone.

Blackstar gasped. "HOW DO YOU KNOW MY GREATEST FEAR?!"

"I stalk you." Tawnypelt mewed simply. "Good day!" she hung up.

The she-cats stared at her.

"Interesting..." Snowbird mewed.

"What's the Thai Ninja Panda?" asked Mistystar.

Tawnypelt made a face. "Long story."

And then Bramblestar walked into the den. Yes, the she-cats had decided to have a sleepover at Squirrelflight's. He caught them with the phone, laughing. "Squirrelflight, you've got to be kidding me."

"Oopsies..." Squirrelflight grinned sheepishly.

"DESTROY THE EVIDENCE!" screamed Mistystar. She threw the phone at the wall and it broke.

Bramblestar face-pawed.

Moonfeather groaned. "There goes all my contacts!"

**In conclusion, prank-calling is bad.**


	104. Thank You Whitestreak!

**Whitestreak's next chapter! And it's dedicated to Fernlight, his creator!**

**Reply to Reviews:**

**Bookworm45669: Well, now I feel stupid...**

**Spottedstar2013: No, I am very aware of what Braille is! I have seen Braille and have written it before. That had been what was requested, and now I'm somewhat regretting doing it...**

**TECHNO Kitty and Guest: Not accepting OCs! Sorry!**

**Cinderxlion00: I think that "Greg from the Honda Dealership" has trouble all over the place. I remember about two or three years ago, this boy announced that he'd prank-called someone named Greg from Honda and he'd threatened to call the police. **

**Goldenwingrocks: ...Whitestreak's got a mate. And Fernlight never said that he liked Hawkfire, so I can't make him jealous like that.**

**iheartbadboys14: Yeah, I was hoping someone would ask for that :) Thanks for doing so!**

* * *

"TIME TO CELEBRATE MY HUBBY FOR SAVING HIS SISTER!" Roseheart yowled, and began to throw pawfuls of confetti in the air.

"YAY FOR WHITESTREAK!" a bunch of random cats chorused and began to throw pawfuls of confetti.

Whitestreak walked into the room. "What are you doing?"

"Celebrating you." Roseheart smiled sweetly.

"Why?"

"You saved Fernlight!"

"Oh yeah. But Fernlight already gave me a big cake in thanks, so... I'm not sure how this'll compare."

"I told her to let me make the party!" Roseheart growled angrily.

"Nah, I'm just yanking your chain." Whitestreak licked her ear. "Thank you."

"SURPRISE!" a bunch of other cats jumped out from random furniture that had been placed in the room.

Several cats hoisted Whitestreak onto their shoulders and put him on a king's throne. Then they put a king's cape thingy around his shoulders and a big bejeweled crown on his head.

"GIVE YOUR PRESENTS TO ZE KING!" screamed one of the cats.

And they lined up with the presents.

Fallenwish was up first. "I don't have much, but I would like to present you with my iPod!" she mewed sweetly.

"Aw, thanks." Whitestreak put in the headphones. "OH COME ON!" he screamed.

"Yes?" Fallenwish mewed innocently.

"This is the iPod that has the He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and the Death Eaters music!" Whitestreak growled. "AND the buds are stuck in my ears!"

"Hee hee. Don't ya like it?" Hawkfire smiled.

"Hawkfire!" yelled Whitestreak. "You were part of this?"

"Course. It's fun torturing you, just sayin'." Hawkfire laughed.

"Thanks so much." Whitestreak crossed his paws. "There's no turning it down, is there?"

"No... that was Shimmerstar's special touch. She broke the volume button." Fallenwish smiled.

"Go figs." Whitestreak grumbled.

"Yeah..."

"Well, thanks for rescuing Fernlight!" Hawkfire smiled sweetly. Then they skipped away.

"How precious..." Whitestreak rolled his eyes.

Then Bulletkit, Ninjakit, and Flashparty came up with another iPod. "This better not be like Fallenwish's and Hawkfire's present." Whitestreak snapped.

"Oh no, very different." Flashparty grinned wickedly, and turned it up high enough that Whitestreak could hear it over He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, and the Death Eaters. "All Night Longer" blared from the iPod.

"Oh, this is ridiculous." Whitestreak grabbed the iPod and threw it as far as he could as Ferncloud stuffed her kits up a tree. "NO MORE PRESENTS!"

"Aw..." the other cats whined as they threw their presents away.

"Time for cake!" Roseheart mewed. And a giant cake was rolled out. It had a picture of two elderly Twolegs and the writing said, "Happy 50th anniversary, Ted and Barbara!"

"Who is Ted and Barbara?" Whitestreak asked, bewildered.

"The people who the cake was meant for. We were given the wrong cake!" Roseheart mewed angrily.

"Oh well. We can still eat it!" Hungryforeverything said enthusiastically. Then he ate it all.

"Thanks for ruining the cake!" Roseheart hissed at him.

"Welcome." Hungryforeverything licked his paws to get any pieces of icing off of them.

"This is disastrous." Roseheart shook her head. "I'm sorry, Whitestreak."

"That's okay, but we may want to be done." Whitestreak patted her on the back.

Suddenly, all the balloons popped.

"Yes, let's be done."

* * *

**-Somewhere Else-**

"Happy fiftieth, Ted and Barbara!" a bunch of Twolegs cheered as a giant cake was wheeled out.

"Why does the cake say "Thank you for saving Fernlight, Whitestreak?" the male Twoleg, Ted, scratched his head.

"We got the wrong cake..." a female Twoleg hung her head. "I'm so sorry."

"Well, cake is cake. Dig in, everyone!"

* * *

**Plushies for everyone who knows who "Voldemort" and the "Death Eaters" are!**


	105. The Thai Ninja Panda

**Regular chapter! **

**Last chapter, the guesses were disappointing. One person knew who I was talking about! Randomstar of AwesomeClan was the only person who knew at least part of it, and MrsSykes37 was the only one who knew that the sense I was talking about. "Voldemort" was referring to Justin Bieber, and "Death Eaters" were One Direction! Didn't you get it? Fallenwish and Hawkfire are definitely the most outspoken Directionators, and they gave Whitestreak and iPod with music! Voldemort and his Death Eaters would not make pretty music, I'll give you that, but I wudda thunk more people would've known what I was talking about! Plushies for MrsSykes37 and Randomstar of AwesomeClan! (MrsSykes gets more though because she knew both...) **

**Bookworm45669: Aw, that's too bad! **

**ONTO THE CHAPTER! It's about the randomness in ShadowClan! *Whoop, whoop* XD**

* * *

"THAI FOOD TUESDAY!" screamed Blackstar. "WHAT DOES EVERYONE WANT?!"

"I want something different. We have Thai Food Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday!" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR crossed her paws. "Then what do you suggest?"

"Chinese food!" butted in Rowanclaw.

"Shut up, no one likes Chinese food." Blackstar shook his head. "Come on, Rowanclaw!"

"Chinese food!" DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR mewed.

"Oh, that's a great idea!" Blackstar purred. "Everyone loves Chinese food!"

"I JUST SAID THAT!" screamed Rowanclaw.

"But it sounds better coming from DA REPLACEMENT RUSSETFUR." giggled Blackstar. "Not as much from you."

Rowanclaw rolled his eyes.

Blackstar looked up the number for the nearest Chinese food place. Then he called and ordered twenty of everything off the menu.

So they stuffed themselves with Chinese food.

That night, while Blackstar was asleep, voices came in his head.

"Blackstar, why did you get Chinese food?"

"Where is your loyalty?"

"Do you know that the voices in your head echo?"

"Never mind that voice, but what do you think the Thai food place will do?"

"Go apologize to them tomorrow! And double your regular order to make up for a missed day!"

Blackstar woke up and ran to the Thai food place.

"Where were you yesterday, Blackstar?" growled the takeout receptionist.

"Um... I was... in the... hospital! Yeah, the hospital!" Blackstar stuttered.

"When you broke your paw and you went to the hospital, you used your cell phone to order Thai food."

"O-oh, did I say hospital? I meant... I was in Australia!"

"You know we do over-ocean service. You've used it before- when you went to Disney in Florida."

"Right..." Blackstar bit his lip. "Okay, I've got nothin'."

"You, who we thought was our most loyal customer, have betrayed us. You shall SUFFER!" the takeout receptionist screamed, and clapped her paws.

A giant panda dressed like a ninja with ninja swords and stars and those thingies jumped out from behind the desk and roared.

"AHHH!" Blackstar screamed as one of the ninja stars whizzed past his ear. "I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY! I WAS HERE TO ORDER DOUBLE TO MAKE UP FOR MISSING YESTERDAY!"

"It is too late." the receptionist growled. "You made the mistake, and you shall suffer for it!"

Blackstar ran into the dining area and the panda chased after him. He leaped on tables and sent plates crashing to the floor. The panda leaped on tables and sent the tables crashing to the floor. Blackstar leaped onto the lighting and then leaped off of it. The panda leaped and sent the lights down.

"SPARE ME, PLEASE!" Blackstar ducked as the panda took a swipe at him with his ninja sword.

"Traitors are never spared." the receptionist called.

"Poop." Blackstar ran out of the building and into ShadowClan. "PREPARE YOURSELVES FOR THE THAI NINJA PANDA!" he screamed.

"The Thai... what?" Tawnypelt mewed, bewildered. The panda crashed into the camp.

"Ooh, Thai Ninja Panda!" Tawnypelt nodded as the panda threw a ninja star into Blackstar's den. She laughed. "That makes sense!" then she stopped. "Wait... no it doesn't! Why is a ninja panda chasing our leader? Not that I'm complaining..."

"No, don't." Shadowheart was sharpening her claws.

"Hee hee." Tawnypelt giggled as Blackstar ran out of the den, screaming, "SAVE MEE!"


	106. How Rootstar Got Her Randomness

**Winner's chapter! Dedicated to Pandamoniam, Rootstar's creator (the cat whose chapter this is... ;))**

**Lloining, LeafAKemi, Starstar412, are you still out there? Because I can't do a winner's chapter for your cats unless you tell me what you want...**

**Foxsplash: No, I am not. Sorry! **

**Evil kittystar: ...If you're getting your influences from this story, I'm not sure how great they are XD And I would like to read your story, but I've decided that I have to refrain from doing so, because of how far I've gone with this one, I can't get accused of plagarism, and it does happen like that. You forget that you read the idea, which already published, then pass it off as your own idea. I don't want that to happen.**

**JayJay's Pie Stand: Oops, my bad! I guess I missed your review... *blushes* whoopsies! Plushies for you, too!**

**Natasha: Not accepting OCs! Sorry!**

** Randomstar of AwesomeClan: Kinda seems like the Directionators are doing that, but now that I think of it... I have an idea...**

**Kitty lover: Yes. And thai food is food that originated in Thailand. **

**ONTO ZE CHAPTER... AND I DON'T OWN WARRIORS...**

* * *

"Rootkit, you're getting your apprentice name today!" purred her mother.

"Yay!" Rootkit squealed. She ran out of the nursery.

"Rootkit, until you get your warrior name, you will be known as Rootpaw!" Onestar mewed. "Sunstrike will be your mentor."

"Cool!" Rootpaw purred as she touched noses with Sunstrike.

"Rootpaw! Rootpaw! Rootpaw!" cheered the Clan.

* * *

"Sunstrike, can you show me the territory?" asked Rootpaw.

"Sure, I don't see why not." Sunstrike led her out of the camp. A little bit later, on their way back, they saw two kittypets skipping around their yard, singing about marshmallows and a stinky panda named Mo.

"Who are those cats?" asked Rootpaw, mystified.

"Screwy and Bolts. They're really weird. WindClan has labeled them insane and we need to avoid them. You as well. Stay away from those kittypets- they're bad news."

"Okay." Rootpaw mewed, nodding.

* * *

A few moons later, after passing by Screwy and Bolts several times on patrols and becoming more and more amused by them each time, Rootpaw decided to run away from WindClan and get randomness training from them.

And so she did.

"Hello, dear chap!" Screwy screamed to her as she neared the fence. "Would you like some tea and Indian food?"

"...What?" Rootpaw frowned.

"Rice and sugar. What did you think I said?"

"You just said tea and Indian food." Rootpaw mewed. "And then rice and sugar."

"No, I said Twix bars and shish-kebabs. Tea and Indian food and rice and sugar make no sense whatsoever, why do you think I'd say those?"

"Whatever. Will you teach me to be random?" Rootpaw asked.

"Oui, Ms. Taco!" Bolts began samba dancing.

"Okay. What first?" Rootpaw asked.

"Well, randomness is something that just happens... so... try to be random, Miss Prickles!" Screwy purred.

"I'm Rootpaw, not Miss Prickles!" Rootpaw sighed.

"See, this is not random. Try harder!" Bolts yelled.

"The point is to not try!" screamed Screwy. "Randomness is just doing things without thinking!"

"Oh." Rootpaw mewed.

"Well, try it! Do something without thinking!" Bolts urged Rootpaw.

"But that just seems abnormal..." Rootpaw mewed.

"Well, it is! Randomness is abnormal!" Bolts sighed.

"Hum." Rootpaw grumbled.

* * *

After a month, Bolts and Screwy gave up on trying to get Rootpaw's randomness.

Bolts threw his paws in the air. "Give up, Rootpaw!" he yelled. "We've tried for so long but you aren't any more random!"

"But I want to be random!" sobbed Rootstar. "Isn't there anything else you can do?"

"There's one thing..." Bolts mewed. "But it is so dangerous, so drastic, so bold, we may all die!"

"Really?" Rootpaw gasped, eyes wide.

"No." Bolts sighed. "RANDOMNESS!"

"Oh."

"So, do you want to do it?" Screwy asked.

"What is it?" Rootpaw asked.

"Um... whacking you with balloons until you lose all sanity." Screwy bit his lip.

"Okay!" Rootpaw mewed. "Wait, what?"

"TOO LATE!" screamed Screwy, and began to whack Rootpaw. Bolts quickly joined in.

After a lot of hits, Rootpaw fainted. When she woke up, she screamed, "I WANT CHEESY PIES!"

"YES!" screamed Screwy and Bolts, then they hugged each other. "WE HAVE ACHIEVED GREATNESS!"

"So now, I give you your randomness name! Rootpaw I name you Rootstar!" Bolts cried. "Y'know, it's not supposed to be "star" but another warrior name... but we're random, so... yeah!"

"THANK YOU, DARTH VADER!" screamed Rootstar.

**And so, Rootstar got her randomness.**

* * *

**To clarify this, Rootstar became random merely through the kittypets. The balloons damaged her brain so all she knows is to be crazy and random. She was not hypnotized by StarClan, as most of the cats who were hypnotized by them are not spewing out random words 24/7, and are more accurately to be called "moderately crazy". Because she was with the kittypets, she forgot about StarClan so they were unable to summon her.**


End file.
